


Anonymous

by saaurus



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Lies, M/M, Mystery, Romance, Secret Identity, Stalking, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-03-21 00:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 89,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13729170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saaurus/pseuds/saaurus
Summary: Aiba Masaki works for a prestigious and severely strict company where flaws lead to imminent dismissal. When a mysterious phone number appears to have stolen Aiba's phone number and begins to message him, Aiba must choose if he would rather ignore a stalker or answer to their cry for help, all while he undergoes the task of uncovering their identity.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Finally got around to post this. I've been working on this fanfic for several years believe it or not and I really love what has come out of it, so I'm excited for you to read it! As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 

His hand hesitated before turning the door knob. His palms grew sweaty and he worried the sweat would show through his shirt. If not, the big coffee stain over most of his suit would be bad enough.

 

_“You can do this, Masaki. Just tell them all you have and you’ll be fine.”_

  
  
Aiba Masaki did not expect to wake up that morning and be running late for work, nor did he plan on crashing into one of the employees at the office and getting drenched in the co-worker’s breakfast. All this just in time for his secretary Ohno to let him know the director was evaluating his project that same day.

 

It had to be a joke, thought Aiba, even laughing at Ohno in disbelief at some point. When the latter didn’t find it amusing in the least, Aiba thought his heart would stop beating all together.

 

Why, out of all days, would the director decide to see him today? He could have chosen any other day, when he wasn’t hungry, and stained and unprepared. Out of all the days, it had to be the one where he would be most likely to be fired.

 

And he could see it in the director’s expression when he walked into the conference room. Director Sakurai was accompanied with two other representatives from the accounting management division. Looking as clean, sharp, and well dressed as ever, they were ready to eat him alive.

 

Aiba couldn’t escape from the looks the gentlemen shot at him, knocking down his securities one by one, or at least what was left of them. He didn’t even have to look up to feel the director’s heavy sighs all the way through his presentation. So much for pretending he knew what he was doing. Instead he was attacked with questions of why his work was incomplete, why was it taking so long, and most of all, why was he making their client wait.

 

All the blows came from the accounting managers, none of them from director Sakurai himself. The latter didn’t bother to look at Aiba throughout the meeting. Yet, why would he be surprised? That was just like him, so full of himself, so ignorant. He didn’t care about his employees, he was too busy making himself important.

 

Even when the torturous meeting was done and the accounting managers and director excused themselves, the director turned away, ignoring Aiba’s farewell and walking out the door without a word.

 

~

 

“What an asshole!” Said Nino, perhaps a little too loudly for someone in the middle of their company’s public café, but Aiba had completely surrendered to the mortification, laying his head over table, and urging the earth to swallow him whole. “He’s making a sport out of humiliating his employees! That son of a-”

 

“He’s the director, Nino. How else do you think he gets people to respect him?” said Aiba.

 

“Don’t make me laugh. The only thing that guy is getting is his ass kissed. He gets paid to make a show out of his employees and still expects them to follow him around. This is all a big joke.” At this point, Nino had stopped pretending he was cleaning the small coffee table for the fifth time. His manager wouldn’t even notice him.

 

“Yeah well, that show is my job. And I would have nothing if I lost it, so keep it down. The last thing I want is to be caught gossiping about the director.”

 

“Right. I forgot we could summon the devil…”

 

“Ah!” Masaki lifted his head when a thought hit him. “If I lose my job, I can’t pay my rent! I’m going to return to my parent’s place! I’ll be cleaning dishes in their restaurant for the rest of my life!” his elbows fell loudly over the table as they held his head.

 

“If I were you, I’d go back in there and start cleaning my desk right away. It’ll save you some time.”

 

“Do you think he would notice if I’m gone?” 

 

“I think he would thank you.”

 

Aiba groaned knowing the young barista was right. Today was not like any ordinary evaluation. Usually it would be Ohno who delivered their presentations to the director before passing them to the accounting managers, but reviewing it themselves over half of the members of the board could only mean they wanted a bloodbath. It wouldn’t be long before they start calling names, sending emails, making calls. They were planning a make-over and Aiba might just be one of the first in line to go. It was only a matter of time.

 

He had made it far, getting accepted into the advertising company he always wanted to work at, getting a seat in his department and doing the work he always dreamed of only to discover the fiend that lived in Sakurai Sho. The one man who seemed to enjoy seeing his employees fail to impress him, rather than celebrating their success.

 

Aiba may have seen him as a different person at some point when he first stepped into the office, but as the work rolled in along with the pressure of his rigorousness, he learned just how much avarice lived in the person he was forced to call his boss.

 

And if his stuck-up attitude wasn’t enough, there was always the office rules displayed in their bulletin board as a reminder of how much he liked to control his employees. It included a dress code, strict and limited lunch hours, and prohibited of any sort of romantic involvement inside the office. Masaki always feared each day for whoever broke them, even if accidentally. It was a one-way ticket to humiliation.

 

~

 

The elevator stopped on his floor, and out the doors, there was a crowd of his co-workers, all murmuring impatiently, obstructing the way to his desk. _What is it now_ , he thought as he made his way through them. All he asked for was a quiet and eventless afternoon so he could return home in one piece. The director had other plans in mind apparently.

 

He couldn’t walk any further towards his desk. From between the employees that stood witnessing, he could make out secretary Ohno, the director and his cubicle partner, Kazama Shunsuke.

 

“Sir, I swear I will contact the client right away. My drafts are ready. I will deliver their contract myself, please-”

 

“Ohno…” the director calls for his secretary, who steps up to hand Kazama a folded paper. The latter takes it hesitantly, refusing to unfold it once he catches the first lines. “But sir-!”

 

“I hope to see your desk emptied when I return.”

 

With those last cutting words, the director made his way through the office. His employees opened a path to his exit towards the elevators, bowing their heads as he passed them by. Only Aiba, who had not caught up with the gesture, catches a glance of the director and the burning hint of his dull eyes. Before he could stop it, it was already too late, the director’s eyes hand landed on him. They burned of anger but felt cold stone to touch. That second was enough to send a clear message to Aiba. If he left his guard down for even a moment, he would be next.

 

~

 

Kazama refused to face Aiba, who had offered to help him clean up his things at least a dozen times. His cubicle neighbor and childhood friend decided to pack his things in silence as the last order he would follow from the director. And before he knew it, Kazama Shunsuke’s desk was vacant.

 

It had been enough to witness for a single day of work. The clock hadn’t even strike 3:00pm and Aiba had a big urge to get home, down a couple of beers and let it all roll away. Find some peace, before the chaos of the next day would come.

 

But until then, he had to continue with his job, working on his projects and endorsing his clients plans. It would have been much easier if he’d already received the Shibuya station response for their ad placement. But he couldn’t work miracles, not even if he wanted to. Not even if Sakurai Sho asked him to.

 

Aiba’s phone rang with a notification from his email. He picked up his phone to read the message when he caught a glimpse of the sender and subject of the email.

 

“ _Metro Railroad Association…?”_ He read aloud, before quickly putting his phone down and rebooting his desktop.

 

 _Metro Railroad Association_ was the first email in the list. He did not delay opening it and read the content of the email, this one being the legitimate letter he had been waiting to receive this past few days. It contained an apology for their late reply with no excuse of why they’ve bailed on him, as well as an apology for not being able to offer Shibuya station for their ad endorsement spot, for it had already been compromised. Instead, the manager of their station had found an open spot in Yokohama station, which he hoped he could offer to their client and continue with their negotiations. The letter finished expecting to receive a reply before the end of the week and signed off by the manager of the Shibuya station himself.

 

Aiba fell back on his seat disbelieved that this was the work of his summoning. How was the manager of the Shibuya station replying to him when he had sent those emails to the MRA? As far as he knew, whenever they found they couldn’t carry on with their proposals, the MRA always made sure to send back an email rejecting their ad endorsement in their stations directly. How would this get in the hands of the station manager?

 

Aiba continue to scroll down the email when he found an additional last message at the bottom. It seemed this mail was forwarded from another address. Someone whose name was only a combination of numbers.

 

From: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

_I hope this could help._

Help? The word repeated in Aiba’s head as he realized, this was not his own doing. It was not his mail they were replying to.

 

Aiba’s reflex was to turn around. Look around the office and scan over his co-workers’ heads, slightly looking into their monitors to see if anyone had the same latter displayed in it. But everyone seemed submerged in their own world. None of their faces turned towards him, no one payed him any of their attention. There was no reaction he could pick up, no one he could point out. Only the email staring back at him.

 

~

 

That afternoon when Aiba finally got home, stripped off his clothes and got rid of the coffee smell from his skin, he grabbed a can of beer and crashed on his sofa. By now, the can of beer in his hand meant something else completely; It was the celebration of his negotiations with his client. He had sent his reply to the Shibuya station manager right away and notified his clients of their offer. By the end of the day, his client had already given him the “Ok” to continue with their plans with the Yokohama station.

 

All of this would have made a big difference if he’d only gotten before his evaluation with the board. Luckily, now he had good news to report to secretary Ohno first thing in the morning. But still, Aiba couldn’t help but pounder on that one question their boss would be asking him the next morning. How did he get the station manager to contact him?

 

Aiba was no good with lies, neither did he have much luck with them, but if anything spilled about someone else having to step into his project to keep the negotiation running, Aiba would be looking at a certain scolding from the director. And even he could tell where that would end.

 

Aiba grabbed his phone. Maybe Ninomiya’s expertise of getting out of trouble with his boss could give him tips on how to avoid his own dismissal. He should still be up at this hour, probably emerged in his video games.

 

When he unlocks his phone, he finds himself in his email, the letter from the MRA already read and the name of its sender along with it. And he remembered he should probably thank them for saving his job, regardless of the trouble it could bring later. No doubt this someone was from the office. Someone who had stepped out of their own work for his sake. That was enough reason for Aiba to compose a new mail.

 

Re: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

Subject: _Thank you_

_Thank you so much. The negotiations are moving on perfectly. I couldn’t have done this without your help._

 

 

He sent the mail without thinking it further and set his phone down. He took a swig from his beer before his phone rang again. Aiba stared at it for several seconds before taking it. It couldn’t be, but it was a new email.

 

From: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

Subject: _

_I’m glad._

 

 

~

 

The office was just as busy the next morning as the board’s evaluations on their employees continued. Thankfully, Aiba couldn’t inform the director personally about his progress in the project but he trusted he could rely on secretary Ohno to pass on to the director. After the secretary typed his report into his board, the message had taken off, hopefully to not return with any doubtful questions.

 

The second he turns around from Ohno, some unexpected hit encounters him, bumping on his side and making the other drop all of their belongings.

 

“I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to get in your way,” the employee who had crashed into Aiba, dropping the boxes blocking his sight, apologized.

 

“No, please. It was my bad,” Aiba leans down to help him pick up the papers and objects that have scattered on the office floor.

 

“I wasn’t looking, I should have been more careful,”

 

“It’s fine. At least it wasn’t coffee.” Aiba joked more to himself than at the man putting away his things. It is not after Aiba hands him over the last pieces of scattered paper that he gets a glimpse of who he addressed.

 

There is something sophisticated about the way he looks. Something mature yet vibrantly young in him has caught Masaki unprepared. The fondness of his eyes and the faint smile in his lips felt almost like a warm touch. And he is staring back at him, without a word, just for a brief second, hinting a spark in the way the beauty spots in his lips curl.

 

“Thank you,” he said, taking the papers from Aiba’s hand, with a hoarse tone that didn’t settle well in Aiba’s stomach.

 

“No problem…” was all he could mutter before getting back on his feet.

 

“Again, I’m sorry for the trouble. I think I’m kind of lost and I can’t find who’s in charge around here.”

 

 _And you’re better off without him_ , thought Aiba.

 

“But, maybe you could tell me…. if there’s a vacant chair with my name I might be missing?” Aiba frowned at the curly, black haired man and offered his help. “I was just sent here by administration. They said they just found a vacant seat and they wanted me to take it. So, I had to move in right away.” And that was how Kazama’s job was given away, thought Aiba. “I’m… Matsumoto Jun, by the way.”

 

Aiba cleared his throat to greet his childhood friend’s replacement formally. “I’m Aiba Masaki.”

 

“Aiba… I hope we can work well together.” Jun bowed to him a little too excitedly to be moving into that office. “Do you happen to know where I can meet with the floor’s director?” he asked.

 

Is was going to be a long day.

 

~

 

Aiba showed him to his desk and Jun was pleased to find out he would be neighboring with his first encountered at the office. In the meantime, Aiba referred him to secretary Ohno so he could complete the formalities of his transferring into the office. Jun thanked him profusely for his help before leaving to find the secretary.

 

Aiba couldn’t turn away as he watched him take off. There was something so lively and glowing in him that he hadn’t seen before in that office. It made him wonder, just how long would it take for the director to shut it all away.

 

Aiba sat back at his desk, submerging himself in his work before getting his hands busy again. Once again, he found himself staring at the interface of his emails. The email sent from 4398@saymail still sat there. Still without a response. Yet Aiba wondered if he even needed to respond to them again. It seemed like things were settled, whatever this meant. There shouldn’t be anything else he was missing, no? Except, things never worked out that way for Aiba Masaki. Because he was never pleased until he could return whatever favors he received, and this was a stranger who had risked his time to help him, he couldn’t let it rest this way. His mails didn’t smell of trouble, so what else could he lose? And because he had pondered on it all night long, Aiba decided to write another email.

 

To: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

Subject: _Thank you_

_If there’s any way I can repay you, please let me know._

 

 

He sent it off without taking a second glance and closed the tab.

 

~

 

He returned to his work for a while before Jun had gotten back from talking with secretary Ohno and started to settle himself in his new cubicle. Aiba had to admit, it was distracting watching Jun from the corner of his eye arranging his desk probably just the same way as he had it in his previous work station. And it was even more interesting to see the sort of things he would take out of his box. His pens, all different colors, a selection of books he used for references, his bright purple tape dispenser, the tiniest of bonsai Aiba had ever seen, and more of his folders and notebooks.

 

Aiba cleared his throat, realizing he was caught stupidly staring at his neighbor’s desk, while his work was left unattended. Something told him work was going to be a little more arduous from now on.

 

Aiba invited Jun along for his lunch break and promised to show him around the office if they made it back on time, which was questionable for Jun who wondered what they could possibly be late for. After talking over a sandwich at the café and receiving quite the stares from Nino at the register, Aiba took Jun for a walk around their floor. It was a quick tour just to review over certain areas of the office like their break room, bathroom, printing room and finally stopping at the bulletin board near the elevators and making him read the rules that were displayed in it.

 

“They may not seem like a big deal, but I suggest you take them seriously. The director has a keen eye when it comes to rule breaking. That’s just one of his charms.”

 

“There’s something I don’t understand yet.” Said Jun contemplating the list. “I keep hearing people say this Sakurai is a terrible guy, but if he’s so terrible, then why do they keep walking on their toes with him. They just let him do whatever he wants.”

 

“It’s not that simple,” said Aiba. “It’s true not everyone likes him but, it’s because of that that everyone is trying so hard. Rather than hating on him, our job is to impress him. We just want that recognition from the boss for ourselves, so we risk our work trying to do the best we possibly can to make it happen. Yes, he is probably the least liked around this place, but… it’s because of his attitude that we strive to keep working. To prove him wrong.”

 

At some point in his talk, Jun had turned to look at Aiba without a reason, capturing the fondness in his words and the admiration that reflected in his eyes as he stared at the board. It was the voice of a man who really loved his job.

 

~

 

As soon as they sat down at their desks, Aiba’s phone vibrated on his pocket. A new notification had arrived in his email and already knowing it’s sender, Aiba waited no further to start up his computer again. He opened the first message in his inbox and read.

 

From: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

Subject: _

_I don’t want to bother you but, perhaps there is something you could do for me._

Aiba immediately scrolled down to type his message.

 

To: [4398@saymail.jp.com](mailto:4398@saymail.jp.com)

Subject: _Of course_

_Just let me know and I’ll do what I can._

He sent the message. Aiba returned to his work, redacting papers, and sending emails as the afternoon rolled away. The office seemed rather peaceful as the evaluations were taking place in the conference room and secretary Ohno wasn’t expecting everyone to hand over reports of their clients for a change. The office seemed quiet. Until Aiba was interrupted by the buzzing of his phone. This time it was a text which he received. From the contacts of an unknown number. It could have been a client trying to contact him, hopefully a representative from the Yokohama station and he was trying to arrange a meeting. But as Aiba read the text in his phone, he slowly remembered the kind of luck that always followed him around.

 

  
_‘Perhaps we could talk like this for a while?’_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is Chapter 2! Let's see what this mysterious person really wants. Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks!I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 2

 

Aiba stares unblinkingly at his phone. He froze in his chair, suddenly becoming too aware of his movements. His sight switched from his desktop to the text he had just received.  
  


_‘Perhaps we could talk like this for a while?’_   
  


For a brief second, he doubted this could be the same voice. There was no proof the phone number and the numbers in the email could be related. It had to be a joke. Then again… who would send him such a text right after replying to his email?

Aiba unlocked his phone and replied with the most neutral message he could think of. He could be wrong.

 

_‘I’m sorry, who is this?’_

Almost immediately after sending, the recipient was typing.

 

_‘We haven’t stopped talking.’_

  
Masaki gulped.

  
_‘I don’t understand.’_

_‘I don’t mean to startle you. I was just_  
wondering… if we could talk.’  
  


  
_‘How did you get this number?’_

  
_‘Would it make a difference if I told you?’_

  
Masaki fell back on his chair with a sigh. He wondered, if he looked around the office thoroughly enough, would he find whoever was at the other side of the conversation?  
  
  


_‘What do you want?’_

_‘I wanted to know if I could make use  
 of your attention.’_

_‘I’m sorry?’_

_‘I want to get to know you…’_   
  


_‘Is this a bad joke? Is someone pranking me?’  
‘Whoever it is, this is not funny.’_

_‘I know you must feel unsettled about this,  
 but I swear, this isn’t a joke.’_

_‘Please think of your words wisely. I could  
report you for this.’_

_“Please, that is not my intention, believe me.’_   
  


_‘Why should I believe you? Why won’t  
you tell me who this is?’_

_‘Please, give me a chance to prove myself to you.’_  
‘I want to be as honest as possible and prove to you  
 I don’t mean any harm.’  
‘I wish you would hear me out…’

_‘What do you want from me?’_

  
  
_‘I want to meet you, Aiba Masaki.’_   
  
  


~

“Tell me all about him. And I want details! Where the hell did you get him?” Nino poured beer into Aiba’s cup, inviting him to speak before digging into their meal.

 

“It’s not what you think. Matsumoto is just a new employee. New people keep coming and going these days. He just… happens to sit next to me.”

 

“You mean that hottie is your new trainee?”

 

“Well… I’m not really training him or anything but… he follows me around.”

 

Nino felt something clench in his chest. “I don’t think I could survive a minute with something like  _that_  following me around, breathing on my neck! I think you finally scored your highest, Masaki.”

 

“Want me to introduce you?” asked Aiba, almost making Nino choke on his drink.

  
  
“Are you serious? Would you really!?”

 

“I don’t see why not. He seems like your type after all.”

 

“But… aren’t you going to give it a shot too? I mean, you saw him first. You called dibs, right?”

 

“I wouldn’t mind if it’s you. Besides… it would never work for me.”

 

Nino rolled his eyes. “Let me guess… You never get this lucky?” he scoffed seeing Aiba didn’t respond. “Right, because the whole universe is against you…”

  
  
“But that’s the thing, Nino,” said Aiba pointing his chopsticks at the young barista. “You of all people know things like this never happen to me without a reason. Suddenly something good comes around and there is always a catch.”

 

“Because of a tiny bit of bad luck?” said Nino, tired of hearing the same words from his friend.

 

“Exactly! I’m telling you, something always happens to me. Nothing is ever that perfect. Not even Matsumoto Jun. I mean… think about it. He could be straight!”

  
  
“Oh, Masaki. Since when is a thing that hot ever straight? You keep taking this too far. Why don’t you give it a rest for a while? Instead of thinking everything is going to go wrong, why don’t you go and take your chance?”

 

“And run into another failed relationship? I think I’ll pass.”

 

“Aiba,” Nino inched closer to the other side of the table. “Think about this carefully. This could be destiny’s way to say ‘I’m sorry’. It’ll be your big break from all that bad luck and those horrible relationships you’ve had so far. Wouldn’t you like to know if this could possibly go somewhere?”

 

Aiba sighed, looking down at his plate of ramen. If anything, he wanted Nino’s words to be true, but he didn’t know how much more he could bear if he was just clinging onto false hopes. Besides, now more than ever, Aiba was doubting if it would be wise to make such an approach towards someone after remembering his messages.   
  


“Nino… There’s something I need to show you.”

  
“What is it?”

  
Masaki clung onto his phone on his lap, fighting between the thoughts of showing him or dealing with things himself. He could predict Nino would probably say it was just a bad prank and he would brush it off suggesting he just block the number. He would probably say that, once again, he was making a big deal out of nothing, but Aiba’s instincts were telling him something completely opposite to Nino’s reasonings. Something he knew he couldn’t fix by just erasing their messages and expecting to forget about it the next day. Something he needed to do himself.  
  


“I… forgot what it was. Sorry…” he laughed nervously.

  
“Well, you better stop spacing out and get in your game! Matsumoto may be new in the office, but he won’t last if you leave him to run the earth on his own. Who knows… he might be into shorter guys. And yes, I mean me.”

 

“You know… there is a rule against relationships in the office.”

 

“So, what? Those guys can shove those rules up their asses for all I care!”

 

That was just like Nino, thought Aiba, taking the initiative on everything. He would shove everyone out of his way and never look back. He was the kind of person who wouldn’t survive a day in the office.

 

~

 

Aiba arrived home several hours after taking a very tipsy Nino to his own apartment. He was exhausted and after dumping his shoes, tie, and suit to the side, he collapsed on his sofa. Nino had ordered far too many bottles for a weekday. He decided to skip the TV for tonight.

 

After a nice long bath, he reached for his phone for any missing notifications and was pleased to find nothing. Perhaps he could finally get some rest for today, except his mind has never taken a second to stop thinking about the unanswered texts in his messages.

 

Curiously, he opens the chat room with the unknown number and finds the same conversation he had decided to abandon that afternoon. The sender’s last unsettling message was still waiting for his reply.

  
_‘I want to meet you, Aiba Masaki.’_

  
Why his name? What were they trying to prove? His fingers had begun to type on the keyboard on their own, knowing he was going to regret it in the morning.

  
_‘Meet me how? I don’t understand_  
what it is that you want?’  
  


He set his phone down and got under his covers, decided to read their answer in the morning. Just then, his phone rang. He was tempted to look. He didn’t want to seem too attached to the fact a stranger was texting him, but he also knew it wouldn’t let him sleep if he didn’t. Once again, and giving up to curiosity, he reached for his phone.

  
_‘I thought you wouldn’t respond.’  
‘I thought I scared you off.’_

_‘Close, but I probably will if you  
don’t tell me who this is.’_

  
_‘I’m sorry…’_

  
They took their time to reply.

  
_‘Can’t we leave that for later?’  
‘Right now… I just want to talk for a while.’_

  
  
_‘Talk? About what?’_

  
_‘Whatever you can tell me.’  
‘About you, I mean… if that’s okay.’_

  
  
_‘No it’s not. I don’t know anything_  
about you either, so why should I trust you?’  
  


  
_‘You are right. And you have all the right to not_  
trust me, but…’  
‘I just… I don’t know how to approach you.’

  
_‘Approach me?’_

  
_‘At work.’  
‘I don’t know how to talk to you.’_

  
_‘Why would you want to talk to me? Out  
of all people?’_

  
_‘I… don’t exactly fit in with the rest.’_

  
_‘How so?’_

  
_‘I usually don’t have anyone around.’_  
‘I work every day, but no one really meets  
 eyes with me.’  
‘I’m alone.’

  
_‘Then… why talk with me?’_

  
_‘I guess… you’re different._  
You don’t usually turn people down, you are   
very hard working and you never get mad at  
anyone. You stand out from the rest.’

_‘I’m not too sure about that…’_

  
_‘I think someone like you is… just right.’_

  
_‘Right for what?’_

  
_‘As a friend.’_

  
_‘You want to be… friends?’_

  
_‘If that’s possible.’_

  
_‘Then why don’t you come up to me in_  
the office and ask me? We could share lunch,   
share a coffee, if that’s what you want.’

  
_‘I can’t.’_

  
_‘Why?’_

  
_‘I can’t do that.’_

  
_‘I don’t understand. Is there something you’re  
ashamed of? I won’t judge you.’_

_‘I simply can’t.’_

  
_‘Then how can I trust you if you’re  
 hiding from me?’_

  
_‘I know this is wrong. I know I’m not_  
doing the smartest move, but at least…  
let me try.’  
‘Let me prove to you… you don’t have to be afraid   
of me. I am not a menace, I am not trying to lie to  
you or take advantage of you. I just… I want to know you.’  
‘Even if you don’t tell me anything about yourself… I  
want to know you.’

_‘And how will you prove that to me?’_

_‘Only if you give me a chance.’_   
_‘I’ll try to be honest with you and gain your trust.’  
‘I ask for nothing more.’_

_‘And this is what you want, for helping me  
with my work?’_

_‘Yes.’_  
‘Nothing more.’  
  
  
Masaki sighed and stared at the ceiling for long seconds. His senses kept warning him this was probably a bad idea. But he could also pick up their cry for help. Whoever they were, they seemed desperate, using their last resources to reach out to him. But what good would he do for them? He wasn’t anyone special, nor could he offer what they were probably seeking in him. Although they didn’t seem to be asking for much but time, Aiba wondered if he could even spare that with a stranger.

  
  
_‘Would you at least tell me your name?’_

  
It was all Masaki could think as a condition. Not before long, the recipient was typing.

  
_‘I would prefer it if I stayed anonymous.’_

~

 

That morning, Masaki received an email from the station manager in Shibuya informing him that the manager from the Yokohama station was available near noon for a consultation about their plans. With a big weight lifted off his back, Aiba forwarded the email to secretary Ohno and informed him he would be meeting with them before arriving to the office. Hopefully, the director would have no problem since it was for the sake of their client.

 

Aiba made it to the Yokohama station early in the morning to look at the sights and secure his meeting with the station manager. Shortly after sitting for a few hours with the manager, the papers were read, made and ready to send to their client for the final changes. Soon enough, the project would be out of his hands.

 

As soon as he was finished, Aiba took the train to return to his company. He had missed breakfast and he couldn’t afford taking any more time outside the office so he resolved on buying a bento at the station and eating it on his way there.

 

He took out his phone to kill time, but found himself staring at his late-night conversation with the unknown messenger.

 

After they had refused to reveal their name to Aiba yet again, he knew nothing he could say would change their mind. Whoever it was, they were determined to keep things at bay.  _Perhaps it’s better this way_ , thought Aiba. Nothing bad ever happened with people he didn’t know.

 

~

  
“Excuse me, Aiba,” When he stepped out of the elevator, he was immediately ambushed by his co-worker, Mistushima, who greeted him with a small voice.

 

Mitsushima Hikari was another face in the office, hired simultaneously with him. They’ve been sharing the same roof since they arrived at the company, yet there was so little Aiba knew about her. She was slightly introverted and didn’t seem to like standing outside her bubble, yet for some reason she’d been working as their office’s event organizer.

 

“I came to inform you… we’ve decided to have a dinner to welcome our new employees. If you would like to join, we are asking for donations to rent a room at the restaurant down the street.” She handed him a half-sheet of paper with all the information she had just reported in print. “Please confirm your attendance in time.” She arranged her glasses and walked away without further word, her eyes never meeting with Aiba’s.

  
Aiba observed the paper in his hand. At least he didn’t have plans that weekend.

 

When he finally made it to his own desk, he collapsed in his chair.

 

“You look like you’ve already done a day’s work.” Said Jun whose attention was drawn into his phone.

  
“And it feels like it too,” Said Aiba, feeling his back grow sore.

  
“Welcome back,” Jun greeted him with a smile this time.

  
Aiba’s phone vibrated in his pocket. An incoming message, perhaps…

 

_‘I was wondering if you would make it today.’_

Their first message of the day.

 

_‘Glad to see you came around.’_

  
_‘I was visiting Yokohama station._  
I received their response just this morning and   
decided to head out first thing in the morning.’

  
_‘So, everything worked out?’_

  
_‘Perfectly! I couldn’t have done it without  
your help.’_

  
_‘The pleasure is mine.’_

  
A smile curled in Masaki’s lips. His thumbs refused to leave the keyboard.

 

_‘Are you sure me just talking with you_  
is enough to pay you back  
for your help?’

 

_‘I’m sure.’_

_‘Wouldn’t it be better if I were_  
to return you the favor by helping  
you with something from your own projects?’

  
_‘That won’t be necessary.’_

_‘Why? I mean… it’s only fair.’_

_‘I don’t think the administration  
would like us conspiring.’_

_‘You mean the director?’_  
‘In that case, I understand.’  
‘But, can I at least treat you for lunch?’

 

There was hesitation from the recipient.

 

_‘Maybe not go with you, but pay for it?  
It’s the least I can do.’_

  
_‘I usually skip lunch. Too much work.’_

  
  
_‘Well, that can’t be good for you._  
You should catch a meal while you can.  
You’ll be more exhausted in the afternoon.’

  
  
_‘Aiba Masaki is worried about a stranger’s  
health?’_

_‘Is that surprising?’_

  
_‘That you’re worried about me, it is.’_  
‘Is there anything you would like to recommend?’  
  


  
Masaki paused, thinking about the question thoroughly. If they were honest enough to follow his recommendations, this could be his one way of knowing.  
  


  
_‘Why don’t you try the sandwiches at the café_  
in the fifth floor? It’s not much but they have this  
 very nice handmade bread. I’m sure you’ll like it.’

  
_‘I’ll think about it.’_   
_‘Do you go there often?’_

_‘Yes. My friend works there. They usually run_  
out, but he always saves some for me.’  
  


_‘I bet you have many friends.’_   
  


_‘I don’t, actually.’_  
‘I’m not as popular as you may think.’  
  


_‘That isn’t necessarily bad, is it?’_   
  


_‘No, it isn’t.’_  
‘I suppose you don’t have much people  
to trust around the office either.’  
  


_‘No.’  
‘And I would like if it stayed that way.’_

_‘Why?’_  
‘People here aren’t so bad. Once you get to know  
them, I mean.’  
  


  
_‘I doubt they would want to know me.’_   
  


_‘You’re wrong.’_  
‘The people here don’t usually shut others  
away. But it all comes down to if you’re willing  
to give it a chance or not.’  
  
  


_‘Why should I when I know they don’t trust me_  
in the first place? Why should I risk it knowing  
I’ll get shoved away.’  
‘I’m sorry…’  
‘I must seem like an introvert to you now…’

_‘And there’s nothing wrong with that.’_  
‘I understand why you would be afraid, so  
I won’t try to push you, but maybe taking   
small steps would help you take down   
those barriers.’  
‘It may seem hard at first but it’s necessary.’  
‘No one should feel alone.’

As Aiba sent the message, he noticed his co-workers standing up from their desks, all in perfect order. Aiba put his phone away quickly and did the same, urging Matsumoto on his side to stand as well. Just then, the formidable presence of director Sakurai walked into the room, followed by his less formidable secretary close behind. The office bowed to him in unison as he walked past and retreated to his office further into the room, sealing himself away from the rest of them. Once out of sight, everyone returned to their own work.

  
“Say...” Jun addressed Aiba. “Do we have to do this every time he comes around?”

  
Masaki shrugged his eyebrows with a sigh. His silence was enough to answer Jun.

 

Taking back his seat, Masaki looked at his phone once again, displaying a new message.

  
_‘I knew you would understand.’_  

~

  
After work, Aiba stopped by the café to see Nino. Regardless of feeling tired after a long day and having a sore back, he needed to see his friend. After all this time, he realized he had told him nothing about the secret messenger in his phone, and Aiba could use some of Nino’s advice right about now. He always came in handy whenever Aiba was conflicted. Although he didn’t know if Nino would rather scold him for not focusing on getting closer to Jun as he had ordered him to do.

  
As he walked towards the café, he almost didn’t take notice of the person walking his way and unintentionally bumped into them violently, accentuating the pain on his shoulder. Aiba’s hand clenched in his arm from the impact and he was ready to apologize to the other, but all he got was a glimpse of his profile before they walked away hurriedly without saying a word. Aiba stared at their direction as they got away.  
  
The moment he stepped up the counter he noticed Nino had not stopped staring behind Aiba, watching as the person hurried over to the elevators before getting out of sight.

  
“Well that wasn’t totally weird.” Said Nino with a trace of sarcasm.   
  
  
“Why am I getting run into so much lately?” Aiba soothed his aching shoulder.  
  
  
“That was the most awkward client I’ve ever talked to.” Added Nino.  
  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
  
“Well first, he didn’t know what he wanted to order, then it was like he couldn’t read the damn menu and I had to spell it out for him. When he finally decided on a sandwich, I wait for him to pay up but he just cancelled his order and ran off. He was a total weirdo.”

 

  
Masaki’s mind paused and traced back to Nino’s words. “Wait… A sandwich?”

 

  
“Yeah, I know, right? Good thing there was still some left from lunch. They usually run out before three.”

 

  
“Did you write his name?”

 

“What?”   
  


  
“His name! Did you write it with his order?”

  
  
“No… he cancelled it before I could take his name. I can’t say I’ve seen him around here much.”

  
Masaki immediately turned to the elevators at the other side of the café as the last person who had entered them had already disappeared. With just a trace of a glimpse, he couldn’t say for sure he had made them out correctly. He must be overreacting, but only a mere coincidence could explain why Ohno Satoshi would come to buy a sandwich after office hours.

  
“Yeah… weird.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: That's the end of Chapter 2. What do you think, does this mystery person sound trustworthy at all? Thanks for reading and see you next chapter! Comments and kudos are very much appreciated~


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is Chapter 3! Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 3

 

 

 

_‘Why does time never expire?’ _

 

_ ‘Good morning. You seem to be lost in thought quite early.’ _

 

_ ‘Long night. You?’_

 

_ ‘I’m good. Too many emails to answer.’_

 

_ ‘Aiba Masaki can take care of it.’_

 

_ ‘I’ll deal with them before lunch.’ ‘Just 4 more hours to go.’_

 

_ ‘Do your best._ ’

 

_ ‘Can I ask you something?’_

 

_ ‘I’m all ears.’_

_ ‘Is us talking this regularly mean I have to refer to you as anonymous all the time?’_

 

_ ‘You can call me anything you like. I don’t mind.’_

 

_ ‘Are you sure? They say I’m pretty good coming up with nicknames! You wouldn’t want to risk it, would you?’_

 

_ ‘Hit me with your best shot.’_

 

_ ‘In that case, I won’t hold back!’ ‘Hm… what about 4398? Like your email. Or something shorter, 43? 98?’_

 

_ ‘I’m sure you can think of an actual name.’_

 

_ ‘Well, since you won’t tell me yours, it’s harder to come up with something that reminds me of you.’_

 

_ ‘In that case you would have to rely on the things you **do** know about me.’_

 

_ ‘Well … I know you’re from the office.’_

 

_ ‘Right.’_

 

_ ‘You like skipping lunch.’_

 

_ ‘Maybe.’_

 

_ ‘You work very hard.’_

 

_ ‘Average.’_

 

_ ‘Meaning you represent over half the people in the whole building.’_

 

_ ‘Yeah… sorry about that.’_

 

_ ‘I got it!’_

 

_ ‘?’_

 

_ ‘You said you wanted to remain anonymous, so, why don’t I use that?’_

 

_ ‘Stick with Anonymous?’_

 

_ ‘No. Anon!’_

 

_ ‘Just Anon?’_

 

_ ‘It’s shorter and easier to type.’ ‘Do you like it?’_

 

_ ‘Suit yourself.’_

 

_ ‘I think it fits you very well.’_

 

_ ‘Then… how should I call you?’_

 

_ ‘Aiba is okay.’_

 

_ ‘Very well then, Aiba.’_

 

 

_ ‘What are you having for lunch?’ _

 

_ ‘You just can’t stop now, can you?’_

 

 

Ninomiya arrived at the end of their conversation and silently placed down Aiba’s phone.

 

“What do you think?” asked Aiba sitting across from him at a table in the café.

 

Ninomiya sighed with crossed arms. “I think you have a stalker.”

 

“B-But it’s not that bad, right? I mean… he’s friendly.”

 

“So, you know it’s a ‘he’?” asked Nino.

 

“I suppose?”

 

“You’re just guessing then?”

 

“We’re… getting to know each other.”

 

“For what exactly?” Nino shot a fulminating look at the older.

 

“For nothing! We just talk. There is nothing wrong with that. And… it seemed like they really needed a friend. They even asked nicely, I can’t deny them that…”

 

“Sure. Let’s be friends with the stranger who stole your contacts and has been following you for who knows how long?”

 

“It’s not like I’m not worried about it too. It was pretty scary when they first started texting me…”

 

“Then why are you allowing it? You don’t owe them anything. They helped you because they just wanted your attention.”

 

“But what if they desperately needed it then? What if they were about to give up on themselves because they couldn’t come up to me in person? What if this was the only way they could face their fear?”

 

“You’re not their psychologist, Aiba. Again, you don’t owe them anything.”

 

Aiba sighed, looking down at his phone. “Maybe I’m not… but I want to help. And I was hoping you would too…”

 

Nino raised a brow at him.

 

“I want to find out who they are, find their name. Maybe then I could be of some help to them.”

 

“Help them how?”

 

 

“I don’t want them to be so insecure about themselves. They shouldn’t be hiding. No one deserves to be alone like that. As their friend, this is the least I can do for them.”

 

 

“I swear, you’re the first person I know who calls their stalker their ‘friend’.”

 

“Call it whatever you want Nino. Are you going to help me or not?”

 

The young barista stared at the older questionably, but Aiba knew very well he wouldn’t let him do it alone. “And I’m not getting anything out of this?” Nino asked.

“I’ll pay our meals for a month.”

Ninomiya sighed. He was probably going to regret it later. “Sure… what do you want?”

 

Aiba smiled knowingly at Nino. “Well, so far, I can’t say I’ve found much. Their email was from a different address than the one they make us use in the company,”

 

“Obviously. He is erasing his trace.”

 

“Right. And I checked a few contacts from what I could find in the registry, and none of them matched with their number. I’ve been trying to get them to spill their name, but they’re not giving themselves away that easily. I need to change tactics. That’s why I need you. You see everyone that comes and goes around here and you know many more employees than I do, so…”

 

“Yeah, I get it. I’ll look around.”

 

“Thank you.” Aiba drank the last of his coffee as it was about time he returned to the office.

 

“Someone in particular you want me to watch out for?” Asked Nino before Aiba could go.

 

He thought about it for a second, remembering what he had seen some days before. But he didn’t want to draw any names yet. It was too soon.

 

“Anyone from my office.”

 

 

~

 

_ ‘What does one have to do to get some coffee around here?’ _

_ ‘You read my mind, Anon.’_

_ ‘Slow day too?’_

_ ‘Busy.’ ‘Instant or brewed?’_

_ ‘At this point, I can’t even tell the difference.’_

_ ‘If you meet me at the break room, I could make some for you.’_

_ ‘I don’t have the energy to laugh.’_

_ ‘Not even in this state you let your guard down?’_

_ ‘Sadly.’_

_ ‘Dark or milk?’_

_ ‘Is this an interrogation?’_

_ ‘It’s an innocent question, Anon. That can’t possibly blow your cover.’_

 

_ ‘…’ ‘Milk.’ _

 

_ ‘There should be some to spare in the break room.’ _

 

_ ‘Do you think the hands of a clock move slower while you stare at them?’_

_ ‘I’m going to make some coffee.’_

_ ‘Have a nice trip.’_

 

_~_

Aiba couldn’t help but smile to himself as he set his phone aside and got up from his chair, simultaneously as the person right next to him. The two looked at each other in surprised.

“Are you…?”

“I was about to get some coffee.”

“Me too…” Jun smiled at the other, a small chuckle escaped his lips.

 

~

 

“How are you getting around so far?” asked Aiba as he poured water into the machine.

 

Jun leaned against the break room’s sink pensively. “Not too different from my previous one, but people seemed to be much reserved around here,”

 

“That’s just in office hours. We’ve been trapped in here all day so things tend to give out that sort of aura. They try to loosen up occasionally, for events and such…”

 

Jun observed how Aiba worked the coffee machine expertly until it finally began to pour into the pot.

 

“Speaking of events, are you… going to tonight’s dinner?” Jun asked as he cleared his throat.

 

“I always go. It’s nice to get out of the routine.” Masaki served their coffee in separate mugs. “Are you going? I mean, you should. You’re one of the guests of honor.” Masaki handed him his cup.

 

“Of course. I’ll be there.”

 

Masaki wet his lips with the hot beverage. “I should probably finish as soon as I can… I still have some things to get ready before tomorrow,” he thought aloud.

 

“If you want, we could head there later… after you’re done.”

Masaki looked at the younger. “No, it’s okay. I wouldn’t want to make you late. You should go with the rest. I won’t take that long.”

 

“Actually… I haven’t had the time to get to know anyone. You’re the only one I’ve properly introduced myself to and… It’s kind of hard getting around the rest.”

 

“You… haven’t met anyone else?”

 

“Surprisingly, I’m not good with meeting people.” Jun sipped into his cup as his throat was hit with its sudden bitterness, which transformed his whole expression. “Is there any milk?”

 

“There must be some in the fridge…” Masaki’s voiced turned small. Observing Jun as he searched the milk carton and mixed it into his drink.

 

 _It’s just milk_ , thought Aiba. It was just a preference. A minor coincidence. There was no reason to overthink everything.

 

“What do you mean you’re not good with people?” Aiba carried on with their conversation, unintentionally digging into his words.

 

“I find it hard to introduce myself and start off a coherent conversation for the first time with someone. It doesn’t come out as natural.”

 

“It seemed pretty natural when we met.”

 

“Yeah, but you… You were different, somehow.” Aiba paused over his drink. “Like… you were very relaxed, you didn’t put pressure on me like others do. You somehow give out your own aura of security.”

 

Masaki chuckled. “My own aura?”

 

“You’re… different, but it’s nothing bad. It’s… just right.”

 

Aiba observed the younger, taking the hot beverage to his lips and savoring its milk-sweetened flavor. It was almost stupid to think he had heard these words before. Still, that this time they would come from a voice and he could hear them aloud didn’t mean a thing. Why would he deprive those words from Jun? They didn’t belong to Anon. Maybe they were right and that was just the impression he gave out to others. Maybe his face screamed a ‘just-right’ kind of guy. So, there was no reason to think it had anything to do with Anon. There was no reason to think about Jun in such a way. Just a minor coincidence.

 

~

 

The coffee helped Aiba wake up and realize the work he still had to go through if he wanted to make it to their gathering that night, but his mind kept drifting off to another scenario away from the office, more specifically to their dinner.

More than half of the employees had already agreed to meet there. There would be food and drinks, probably lots of drinking. It was an occasion where people were rarely left behind. Aiba trusted tonight would not be the exception.

 

This time, when he grabbed his phone, he scrolled over Anon’s chatroom and opened a different one.

 

 

_ ‘Nino, you there?’ ‘I have a plan.’ _

 

 

It took several minutes for the younger to pick up his phone.

 

_ ‘This better be good.’ _

 

_ ‘We’re having a party tonight.’ ‘The whole office is going to be there.’_

 

_ ‘I don’t know if I should feel offended. And you’re not going to invite!?_ _ ’ _

 

_ ‘Let me finish! ’ ‘If it’s an office party, it should be obvious right? Anon will be there too?’_

 

_ ‘I don’t see why not.’_

 

_ ‘In that case, I need to make sure that everyone is there.’ ‘I’ll keep you posted.’ _

 

 

_ ‘Wait… I don’t get it. Does this mean I’m not invited?’ _

 

~

Aiba looked up from his phone and at the serenity of the office. The employees scattered across the room, each in their own world just inches from each other, murmuring to not disturb he stillness of the afternoon. Hidden behind his monitor, Aiba scanned the office until he found his subject near the entrance. The secretary, Ohno stood in a corner, typing away into his tablet as he listened to a young employee’s concern. Ohno was a slightly smaller man from the average employee, and regardless of his position, he still held a gap of years between him and the director.

 

Even when he was the only one the employees liked to consult things over with, half of the time, they couldn’t tell if Ohno paid them any attention. To some, it seemed more like Ohno nodded his head out of their conversations in most occasions.

 

For Aiba, Ohno always seemed like a compromised man who looked for the greater good in the office. He may have been lacking in some aspect but perhaps things like his loss of sleep could be linked with his hard work. He had the background to assume such a post in the office, but it was concerning when Ohno didn’t get their messages across to the director.

 

Once Ohno had finished typing into his tablet and the young employee had returned to his own cubicle, Ohno headed down to the director’s office by the far side of the floor. As brief as it seemed when he watched Ohno walking past him and after giving him a detailed look, he realized there was no doubt he had seen Ohno Satoshi’s profile before, that afternoon at the café.

 

Aiba could have sworn he’d noticed the secretary glaring in his direction as he passed by his cubicle, yet his clever hiding skills behind his monitor helped to drift his attention away and, shortly after, Ohno disappeared into the director’s office. Now was his chance.

 

Jun had taken notice of his cubicle neighbor acting quite on edge before he finally decided on leaving his chair and walking to the other side of the office. Jun’s fingers paused over his keyboard to watch Aiba cross the room and stopping at a far desk where a female sat by. If he remembered correctly, it was the same one who had asked for donations for their dinner. 

 

They exchanged a brief conversation before he saw Aiba returning, and he fixed on his screen before Aiba would notice.

Aiba let out a loud sign as he sat on his chair before reaching for his phone.

“Everything okay?” Jun tried asking him looking as detached from Aiba’s business as he could.

 

Aiba turned to younger, finding his attention glued to his monitor and his fingers working on his keyboard as if he didn’t have to move an inch to take notice of his movement.

 

Aiba’s answer was nothing more than a weak chuckle to spare him any made-up explanation that might had made complete nonsense, but still managed to make himself look like an idiot in front of Jun.

 

To avoid eye contact, Masaki unlocked his phone and opened his recent messages.

 

 

_ ‘It’s done. I think everything should work out just fine.’ _

 

 

_ ‘I have no clue of what you’re talking about but good for you.’ _

 

_ ‘I was making sure everyone was invited to tonight’s dinner.’  _

 

_ ‘Everyone… meaning?’ _

 

_ ‘Secretary Ohno.’  _

 

_ ‘I totally know who you’re talking about.’ _

 

_ ‘Your costumer yesterday.’  _

 

_ ‘The creep? Why would you want him there?’ _

 

_ ‘I need to look into something.’ ‘Anyway, I have to go.’  _

 

_ ‘You do you.’ _

 

_ ‘P.S.: Why is Matsumoto’s chair so close to mine all out of a sudden? _ _ ’  _

 

_ ‘Going with your instinct? _ _’_ __

 

_ ‘It’s not me, I swear!’  _

 

_ ‘Sure thing’ ‘Call me when you get to his lap.’ _

 

_ ‘NINO!’ _

 

~

 

_ ‘Finally finished for today!’ _

 

_ ‘Thank you for your hard work.’_

 

_ ‘I could use a cold beer right about now.’_

 

 

_ ‘That sounds quite tempting.’ _

 

_ ‘I hope there’s enough to go around at the dinner.’ ‘Will you be there?’_

 

 

_ ‘…’ _

 

_ ‘Everyone’s going.’ ‘It’ll be impossible to tell who you are.’ ‘I promise I won’t try if that’s what you’re worried about.’ ‘I just wanted to know if there was a chance we could share a drink together. As my thank you.’_

 

_ ‘In that case, I will make sure to drink with you.’_

 

_ ‘You will?’ ‘Thank you!’_

 

~

 

Masaki sent the message and grabbed his coat to head out the empty office. Jun stood by the elevator, fumbling in his phone which he put away once Aiba came to view. As they had arranged, he waited for Aiba until he finished with his work for the day, hoping they would be of each other’s company for the evening.

 

~

 

The room for their gathering may have seemed bigger if there were less people than the ones present by the time Aiba and Jun arrived. Both men were invited to sit by the far side of the table, where there still was some space left for them. Apparently, they had arrived just in time for the food to start being served. The plates took up the entirety of the table by their quantity. As they began to pour drinks into one another’s cups, Aiba looked around the table and all the attendees were perfectly lined up on all his sides. So far, there were no signs of the subject of his interest.

 

Meanwhile, Jun had begun to pour the first serving of alcohol into Aiba’s cup in a kind gesture. Aiba slightly bowed his head at the younger and returned the favor as he served Jun’s cup. The table was so cramped they both had to squeeze in together to get a spot to place down their drinks, even if their shoulders brushed every now and then. Aiba hoped this wouldn’t last all night as he began to feel a small blush on his cheeks he hoped Jun wouldn’t notice by their proximity. If not, the alcohol was a good excuse to hide it.

 

Aiba decided to take this as a reminder. If Anon had promised to drink with him tonight, confirming their presence there, while Aiba had promised he would not look for them, why would he still work himself up to find them? The only one he had compromised himself with was Nino, but even he wasn’t putting much care into Aiba’s search. At least Nino pretended to listen, but Aiba was doubtful when it came to rely on him. In any case, it would make Nino even happier if Aiba forgot about the whole deal and just went on with the evening. It was the end of the week, at least he deserved to take it easy for just a moment, eat to his heart’s content and let the rest of the night roll away.

 

The paper door to their room slid open. Secretary Ohno had arrived.

 

~

After the toast routine, which in this occasion was headed by Ohno himself with his invitation to enjoy their evening to the fullest, their dinner officially began. After the food was served, the drinks kept coming in, passing from one another until every cup was full, before being emptied right away.

 

For the first half of their evening, Jun remained seated quite closely to Aiba, enjoying little chatter with the latter as the room got filled with joyful laughter and voices speaking over each other. The night moved slowly and both men limited themselves on nibbling on food. It must have been by the time one of their co-workers had begun their demonstration in the folkloric dances of Hokkaido that Jun had been snatched by a couple of female employees who had begun to hit him with an endless list of questions. By then, it was just Aiba and his drink.

 

He tried to divert his attention to the main source of entertainment as most of the room laughed drunkenly at their employee’s mispronunciations of their typical songs, but Aiba wouldn’t find this to his enjoyment. His attention diverted somewhere else when he saw his friend and former cubicle neighbor, Kazama Shunsuke drinking at the other side of the table.

 

 

For a moment, it may have seemed like a misplacement of some sort, as Kazama didn’t seem to be taking part of the spectacle yet he was present in the premises. He wasn’t specifically drawn to the songs and dances either. He simply drank from his own cup of beer quietly as if the ambience couldn’t reach him. No one paid him much mind as he wasn’t trying to engage in conversation with anyone. He was alone, almost apart, and isolated from everyone else. Everyone, except Aiba, who could see him. But there was no way to get to him, not if he wanted to talk and ask of what happened after the moment he was fired. But it was not at this place and time that this seemed ideal. If he would have wanted to talk to Aiba about it, he would have contacted him before. Besides, he seemed to be quite absorbed in his drinking.

 

 

Aiba turned away from this idea to a different scenario at the back of the room. While one side was the life of their party, the opposite side was an empty corner with decorations of flower vases to fill in the empty walls. By that corner of the room he found Ohno. Their solitary secretary, who had seemed to lose his place in the room without the director to boss him around, was giving his back to the rest of the world, sitting on the floor all by himself admiring a single vase of radiant white lilies.

 

His slumped shoulders gave out a sigh occasionally. In his hand, his glass was almost running empty, yet he wasn’t looking willing to return near the table to refill. At this point, getting on his feet would be walking out the door. But by no means was this what Aiba had planned. He grabbed the nearest bottle before getting up from the table and approaching Ohno at the other side of the room.

 

Jun reached to his side, signaling Aiba for a way out of the conversation he had been dragged through for a while now, before he realized Aiba had disappeared from his spot. For a second, Jun thought he had lost Aiba to the talks and laughs of the room and he searched for him discretely as to not interrupt his female co-workers endless chatter, until he finally spotted him approaching the secretary by the end of the room.

 

“May I?” asked Aiba to the older who had a hard time building a reaction to Aiba’s visit.

 

When Ohno finally raised his sight to whom asked to join them, he could barely return him a nod in approval. Aiba took a spot beside him, setting aside his cup to serve another drink into Ohno’s.

 

“Thank you for your hard work.” Aiba repeated in protocol.

 

Ohno said nothing but to signal him to stop pouring.

 

“Thank you for coming all this way.” Aiba presumed it was only natural to acknowledge his assistance. After all, he had no idea of the kind of work he could be putting off at the moment to be there. “We appreciate you’ve joined us for tonight. I hope it wasn’t of any trouble.”

 

Ohno nodded, his eyes never meeting with Aiba’s. It was no surprise his words were so hard to come across.

“How are you enjoying the evening, sir?” His words didn’t seem to be put of interest to the one beside him.

 

 

Ohno’s gaze contemplated the tatami mat, his finger tracing on the straws, as if he’d forgotten Aiba was addressing him.

 

 

“If you’re not comfortable with this sort of gathering, I understand. Perhaps we would have arranged something different if we knew you were coming before hand,” Aiba tried again, this time surprised by a heavy sigh from the other. He waited for the right timing to not make him feel pressured. “Is… everything okay?”

 

“Say…” Ohno began rather slowly. “Would you… tell me something?” his voice sounded broken, perhaps he already had his proper service of drinks.

 

“Anything, sir.” Aiba inched closer, allowing his muffled words to reach him.

 

“Have you ever -hiccup-… been in love?”

 

Masaki almost choked on his breath. His thoughts froze unable to process the words Ohno spoke. Still Ohno didn’t seem the least shaken nor embarrassed to have said them aloud. Masaki cleared his throat a couple of times before speaking.

 

“I- I’m sorry… what was that, sir?” 

 

Ohno groaned as he pouted drunkenly. “I’m so pathetic…” Ohno hid his face in his palms. “What gives… he doesn’t even know who I am.”

 

Aiba’s eyes bulged, not daring to meet eyes with him, afraid he might be witnessing something he was not supposed to hear.

 

“I can’t go up to him. I can’t talk to him, but then, why do I have to think about him all the time… It’s so tedious. And then when I look, always, he just _happens_ to be there!” The secretary waved his hands drunkenly. “I mean… I’m trying to work! Why can’t he go bother someone else? And then… it’s _me_ who gets scolded. And then there’s that… stupid Sakurai! I don’t get paid enough to be pushed around like this… he is so stupid! Stupid!”

For once Aiba was grateful the director always refused to join in their gatherings.

 

“It was going okay… I was fine being invisible… so why did I have to talk to him…? Why did I have to blow it? Now he hates me.”

 

“D-Don’t say that…” Aiba tried stepping in. Not sure of what he was doing himself, he hoped the alcohol in his system would take over. “You don’t know that for sure. There is still a chance that you can be honest about your feelings. But… You should tell them straight and stop avoiding it. If you really like them, you must be honest with yourself. It’s the only way you can truly open up to them about what you feel and, regardless of what their answer might be, I promise you, you will feel so much better. But you can’t let your fear make that decision for you.”

 

“You think so…?” said Ohno is a small voice.

 

“I’m positive. So, don’t give yourself a hard time. Who knows what their answer might be? And don’t try deciding for them either. That is completely up to them. But… once your feelings get across, you’ll feel much better.”

 

There was a faint sound of a sob which Aiba could tell straight away it had come from him. The drunk secretary sniffed repeatedly, his head facing down as to not let his state be shown. He wiped his face with his sleeves, getting rid of any traces that may have proven his crying.

 

“Thank you…” said Ohno with a drunk and broken voice.

 

 

Masaki contemplated the older, still wiping tears from his eyes and downing what remained in his glass before setting it down loudly. Masaki could only begin to wonder what sort of troubles Ohno carried with him each day. With such strict conditions of never showing a hint of feeling or complaint to anyone, his job as the director’s right hand never seemed any more arduous. Like a mask, he wore his indifference as if it was just another part of his suit. But now, as Aiba sat up close to him, he could see the shadows that framed his eyes and the light of his young-looking visage fading away only to be replaced by the trace of countless sleepless nights.

 

 

Ohno’s head began rocking, his eyes no longer focused on the wall. Eventually, there was not much of a battle to fight before his head surrendered to sleep and leaned on Aiba’s side, surprising the younger with the new weight in his shoulder. Aiba didn’t bother to shake him off; instead he allowed him the favor. He couldn’t imagine all the things that may have happened today alone for him to be feeling this way and now part of him felt sorry for dragging him to their party.

 _He’s just another one of us_ , thought Aiba. _Another employee trying to survive, someone who has it rougher than others_. And indeed, Ohno had quite some guts to be able to face the director every single day and fulfil every one of his orders without a miss. On the bright side, Aiba was glad he had insisted Mitsushima to extend him the invitation. For other non-selfish reasons, Ohno needed to be there, he needed this night for himself. To drink away his own worries and patch together the pieces of his broken heart.

 

The liveness of the party had still not faded from the table as the laughter and chatter continued. The two co-workers in the back of the room had captured two pairs of eyes, a pair which watched over them fondly and another to whom the site seemed to be a sore to the eyes.

 

 

~

 

 

After the evening had begun to wind down, the guests began to slowly disappear, returning to their homes with their families or undertaking their quest to find their next bar. Aiba had returned to the table as his body had started to give up on his drinks. His hand held his cheek as he began to doze off to the decreasing chatter. His eyelids could barely hold themselves open for a second as he noticed a figure approaching him and sitting right beside him on the table.

 

By then, Aiba’s head surrendered and fell over on the table, refusing to fight against the alcohol and sleepiness. All he could perceive was the sound of a drink being poured into his glass and the clinging of their drinks in a silent toast. His effort to talk came out as an incoherent mumble, catching only but a shadow of the one next to him. The latter’s glass set down on the table loudly, moving away from Masaki’s side and disappearing with everyone else out the door.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the end of Chapter 3! Ohno seems to have a lot to say. And could this mysterious person be who we've been waiting to see? Thanks for reading and see you next chapter! Kudos and Comments are very much appreciated~


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Welcome to Chapter 4! I'll be doing weekly posting from now on, but don't worry, the chapters WILL get longer. Hope you enjoy!   
> Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks!I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 Chapter 4

 

  
_‘It’s a lovely night.’_

_‘Did you saw the moon?’_

_‘I don’t think I’ve seen it so close before.’_

_‘It’s shining so brightly makes me think of…’_

_‘I think I’ve had enough drinking for tonight.’_

_‘Aiba?’_

_‘Are you still out?’_

_‘Be careful on your way home.’_

_‘Good night.’_

  
  
~

 

_‘Good Morning.’  
  
_

_‘I suppose you had a long night?’_

_  
‘Yeah… sorry I didn’t see your messages.’_

_  
‘No worries. You had fun?’_

_  
‘I guess. Morning sickness is protocol.  
And you? Did you have a good night?’_

_  
‘Surprisingly, I did.’_

_  
‘Why are we trapped in this laboring system?’_

_  
‘I ask myself the same thing.’_

_‘I’ve never yearned for a free day more.’_

_‘What does Aiba Masaki do on his free days?’_

_  
‘Everything I can’t do over the week.  
Groceries and cleaning. I’ll go out if I have to  
but I don’t like moving around much.’  
  
_

_‘So you would just stay at home and do nothing?’  
  
_

_  
‘I deserve to do nothing occasionally.  
It’s better than the office, at least.’  
‘What about you?’_

_  
‘I do my own things.’_

_  
‘Such as…?’_

_  
‘The usual.’_

_‘For example,…?’_

_‘I get things done, I guess?  
What do you want me to say?’_

_‘Sorry if I’m being so straight forward, but  
I feel I’ve been very honest with you and I thought  
maybe I could talk less about me and learn a bit  
 more about you for a change.’_

_‘Why would you want to know about me?’_

_‘Well you did ask me to be your friend.  
It is only fair I get to know you too.  
It would make me quite selfish if I didn’t.’  
‘So tell me about yourself.’  
‘Who is Anon when he is not in the office?’_

_‘Fine… It’s more of the same. Responsibilities,  
running errands, going places. Boring adult stuff.’_

_  
‘That’s not bad.’_

_‘I don’t think I can rest without feeling the least  
bit accomplished.’_

_  
‘That’s nice, I’ve learned something new about you.’_

_  
‘I think I’m getting too carried away.’_

_  
‘No, it’s fine! It’s not like your telling me your life story.  
This is nice.’_

_  
‘I guess.’_

_  
‘I think… you should open about yourself a bit more.’_

_  
‘I really shouldn’t.’_

_  
‘Anon, it’s okay. You don’t have to hide from me.  
You know you can trust in me.’  
  
_

_‘…’_

_‘I think it was very brave of you to start talking to me  
like this. It must have taken a lot of courage and I  
really appreciate it. Truly, I’m flattered. You don’t have to   
be afraid of me now.’_

_‘All I’m saying is… I want to try.’_

_  
‘Try…?’_

_  
‘To get to know you.’_

_‘If you allow me that is.’_

_‘This is unfair.’_

_‘?’_

_‘You know I can’t say no to you.’_

_‘Why don’t we play a game?  
To make things fair.’_

_‘Game?’_

_‘You know… like the ones you ask a question,  
I answer and then I make a question for you.’_

_‘Taking turns?’_

_‘Exactly!’  
  
_

_‘I don’t know…’_

_It’ll be fun!’_

_‘I guess, we could try just a little...’_

_‘Fine! I’ll start!’_

_‘But… didn’t you propose the game?’_

_  
‘Yeah, so I start the game!’_

_‘No. The person next to the one who shuffles  
the cards start the game, which, in this case  
I’m the only candidate.’_

_‘No. In **this** case, I’m pretty sure you’re not next  
to me (unless you’re riding my train) and if   
I look to my left I can see my reflection so, yes. It’s still me.’_

_‘Now stop typing, I’m trying to write a question.’_

_‘_ …’  


_‘Okay… Do you have any pets?’_

_  
‘Pets? Is that really your first question? Out of all  
thing?’_

_  
‘Hey! You’re not following the rules! If you  
want to make a question you have to answer   
mine first.’_

_  
‘Okay… No, I don’t have any pets.  
I don’t really have much time to take care of animals.’_

_  
‘I see. I understand.’_

_‘And, to answer your question, yes, pets.  
I’ve heard they’re quite a good   
conversation starter. Now it’s my turn again!’_

_‘What? That’s not right! I answered you, it’s my turn!’_

_‘You already asked me a question and I  
already answered, so it’s my turn.’_

_‘That can’t possibly count as question! I demand  
a revision of the rules.’_

_‘Fine… request granted_ _.’_

_‘Thank you.’_

~

  
Aiba typed nto his phone, crumpled in a corner of the silent elevator along with several other employees that came in that morning. If it were rude to be that engrossed in his conversation while in a public place, it didn’t occur to him, but he was determined to get as many answers from Anon before the workday would officially begin.

 

The elevator made a stop on a floor preceding his, when another employee suddenly shouted a firm “Good morning, director!” while the rest of them repeated the greeting. Aiba’s attention had been drawn away from his phone acknowledging when the Sakurai's figure was revealed at the elevator's opening. He joined the rest as they offered apologetic bows to Sakurai while everyone stepped out of the elevator, allowing him to get in once it was emptied.

 

 Even when granted the luxury to ride the elevator on his own, the director refrained from showing gratitude towards his employees. Each time they were abstain from any sort of comment and watch silently while the doors closed on the almost empty elevator as it set off to Aiba’s floor. The employee’s frustration was clear in their groans as they called for the next one, but regardless of finding it just as tedious as the rest, Aiba preferred not to manifest his complains so publicly and put on his best smile. It was his boss after all. Who knew who could be listening.

 

~

 

 

_‘When is your birthday?’_

_‘Going personal?’_

_‘Just a little.’_

_‘December 24 th.’_

_‘How convenient.’_

_‘Not when your parents use it as an excuse to  
give you a single gift for the whole year.’_

_‘I see why that would happen.’_

_‘Believe me, it is not the most fortunate for a child.’_

_  
‘I never took you as greedy.’_

_‘Well, not right know of course.  
We grow up eventually.’_

_‘Are these revelations from your childhood?’_

_‘Most likely.‘  
  
_

_‘Alright, your turn.’_

_‘You did two in a row, so I get  
to make two.’_

_‘That last one doesn’t even count!’_

_‘Are you allergic to anything?’_

_  
‘No…’  
‘Are you even taking your game seriously?’_

_‘Hey! It’s still my turn!’_

_‘I’m only saying, you can take your time to  
think of your question. You don’t have to ask  
me right away.’_

_‘But you type so fast! And if I take any more  
time, I might get scolded for using my phone during  
work hours. Now, shh!’_

‘…’

 

_‘Actually…’  
 ‘There is something I’ve been meaning to ask.’  
‘I don’t know how to say this…’_

_‘Ask and I’ll take care of the rest.’_

_‘Alright…’  
‘Are you a man?’_

_‘Not the only one who is going personal.’_

_‘You gave me the idea.’_

_‘So?’_

_‘… Yes, I am.’_

_‘I thought you would hesitate.’  
  
_

_‘I thought about it.’  
‘But you would’ve found out sooner or later.’  
‘I can’t hide everything from you.’  
  
_

_‘You’re right. I suppose I’ve known for a while.’  
‘Guess I wasted my two questions.’  
‘Still, I wanted to be sure.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘I don’t know.’  
‘It’s been on my mind.’_

 

~

  
Aiba’s phone rested on his desk at close range, going off with a constant buzzing that’d captured even Jun’s attention. Aiba would look at each incoming message with great regret, unable to answer them right away. Conscious of the work he still had to do, he tried to fix his attention on his monitor before realizing he couldn't fight back the urge to look at his new messages. Slyly, he hid his phone under his desk, and hiding a smile that tried to escape his lips, he proceeded to answer them one by one.

 

“Excuse me,”

  
Masaki froze by the sudden intrusion of another’s voice behind him. Slowly, he turned towards the secretary as he slid his phone under his body.

  
“May I have a word with you?” Ohno half-asked, half-commanded.

  
Aiba exchanged a look with Jun before realizing it had been him who Ohno spoke to. Jun gave Aiba a questioning look, wondering if this meant he had gotten in any trouble, to which Aiba simply didn’t have an answer to. Without an option, Aiba got up from his chair and followed a stiff looking Ohno, walking through the office and towards the much-avoided door by the end of the room; the director’s office.

  
Masaki’s steps got smaller, holding his breath, almost refusing to approach the door any further, but eventually walking through as Ohno allowed him to go in first. The rest of the office had somehow grown in murmurs, as the two men disappeared through the door. Soon, comments and speculations began to rise in the silence of the office, all wondering what the director could possibly be planning now.

 

But Masaki’s nerves calmed when he realized the empty silence extending beyond the door. It hadn’t been many the times that Aiba had walked into the director’s office, and even less the opportunities he had been there without him present in the room. But if it wasn’t the director that wanted to see him, then…

 

“Ohno…?” Aiba turned to the secretary who still faced the door, staring down on his hand holding on to the door knob. He sighed deeply as he let his shoulders loosened and his head banged against the door.

  
“I’m sorry…” His voice was small and almost pitiful. “I shouldn’t be doing this…”

  
“Is… everything okay?”

  
Ohno faced Aiba, or at least he tried to as his eyes were still glued to the ground. “I don’t’ know how to say this,” Ohno stalled. Aiba didn’t realize what was going on until he noticed how Ohno’s hands gripped on the rim of his suit jacket. Could this… finally be it?

  
Ohno’s body arched in a bow. “Please!” His voice almost cracked with the suddenness of his gesture, which took Aiba unaware. “I’m begging you! Please forget everything that happened!”  
  
  
“I-I’m sorry?” Said Aiba, confused by Ohno’s gesture.

  
“Last night… I was really drunk, I barely remember what I spoke about and I deeply regret it! I shouldn’t have done such things in front of you. It was simply not professional. It was my mistake so please... I’m asking if you could kindly forget about everything.”

 

“Ohno… It’s okay-“

  
“I don’t want you to have a wrong impression of me. I’m not like this, I swear-“

  
“Ohno!” Said Aiba, firmly, cutting the older’s words. “It’s fine. I understand. You don’t have to worry. I will not speak a word.”

  
Ohno sighed anxiously, realizing he’d gotten too carried away. “I’m sorry,” the secretary repeated. “I was such an idiot. I mustn’t have bothered you. I really should have been more careful.”

  
“N-No! It was nothing, believe me. Besides… it sounded like you needed to let things out a little.” The secretary’s pitiful look returned. “But you shouldn’t feel bad about it. You can trust me. I promise, I wont say a word.”

 

“Thank you…” His body finally relaxed.  


“If I may suggest, you should be careful to whom you talk to next time. You wouldn’t want to get in trouble.”

 

“Yeah-“ Ohno paused as if he was hit with a sudden thought that only got confirmed when he raised his sight to Aiba. “Say…” his voice became smaller. “Did I… perhaps, say something about the director?”

 

Without a doubt, Aiba remembered the few curses the drunk secretary had let escape in his momentary rampage, but they weren’t things he necessarily had to worry over. At some point, everyone in the office may have thought the same way he did.

 

“You don’t have to overthink it. It’ll be fine. He won’t hear a thing.” Aiba promised him.

 

~

 

Jun observed his cubicle partner since the moment he saw him coming back from the director’s office in one piece. There was nothing shaken in him to be worried about nor was there a sign of a disaster having taken place. Aiba had simply sat back on his desk, proceeding to continue his work and answer his emails.

 

“Is everything okay?” Jun approached him over the silence of the office.

 

Aiba turned to the younger whose worry was very clear in his eyes. “Yeah. Just fine.” Aiba’s reassuring smile was not enough to convince Jun.

  
“What did they want with you?” he tried again.

  
“Nothing.” His words seemed so empty, Jun couldn’t put a finger on what may had happen, but regardless of Aiba being a bad liar, he knew he was not going to get an answer out of him.

 

For a moment, Jun decided to drop the matter and let Aiba return to his work. It was probably none of his concern nor anyone else’s. Yet, Jun couldn’t ignore the constant whispering of his co-workers when Aiba walked into the director’s office. Half of them saying Aiba was approaching the secretary more than usual, the other half asking what Aiba could possibly be plotting with the secretary again, all remembering their previous evening and the moment the two of them had shared at their dinner the night before.

 

Jun refused to believe their speculations. If anything, Aiba was only trying to make the secretary feel included and less of a stranger to most of them who only saw him as an extension of the director. Unfortunately, they didn’t know Aiba the way he did.

 

“I’ve been meaning to ask you…” Jun turned to Aiba once again. “What are you doing for lunch today?”

 

 

~

 

_‘Half a day done. Going for lunch?’_

_  
‘That’s correct.’_

_  
‘Really? You’re eating?’_

_  
‘I don’t know what you think of me, but I DO  
eat. Some days more than others. The office   
has me stressed all the time so my appetite  
usually dies down.’  
‘Regardless, I enjoy a good meal.’_

_  
‘You should have told me sooner!’  
‘And here I thought you were starving yourself.’_

_  
‘You worry too much about strangers, Aiba Masaki.’_

_  
‘At any case, the stranger makes me worried.’_

_  
‘I’m flattered.’_

_  
‘And what’s with this Aiba Masaki treatment, Anon?  
I told you to call me Aiba.’_

_‘Sorry_ _…’_

_  
_ ~

 

“You wanted to talk about something?” Both co-workers sat at the café sharing a small meal over cold drinks.

 

Matsumoto leaned back on his chair, relaxing his body with a sigh, thinking of where he should start. “I don’t know why but, I feel I can open up to you better than others.”

 

Aiba left his food untouched to listen to the younger carefully.

 

“I’ve been kind of troubled lately, outside the office I mean. I don’t know how to bring this up…”

 

“Is there is something you need help with?” Asked Aiba, before Jun realize his stalling was only making the other worry.

 

“Actually it’s… my mother. She has been sick for some time…”

 

“Your mother?” Aiba repeated, certainly not waiting for such a conversation to take place.

 

“She’s been hospitalized for several weeks, waiting for recovery, but things are looking rough lately. I can’t look after her all the time so I’ve been asking for help from some relatives but… other than that, we’re on our own. She needs surgery very soon, but I haven’t been able to give the doctors an answer because our situation isn’t the best. Or… at least it wasn’t until I got promoted to our department. I have a better salary now, and I think it might just be enough to make the first payment to the hospital. That means she will have to be rushed to surgery as soon as possible, maybe next week...”

 

“That’s good news, no?”

 

“Still… What I meant to ask you… I don’t know how to approach the director about this.” The worry in the younger’s eyes glowed genuinely. “I keep hearing things about him, to not let my guard down or to not be fooled by him, but I don’t know what else to do. I need to be with my mother. I can’t let her do this alone.”

 

“Then ask him.” Said Masaki. “Forget about what everyone else says and go up to him. Let him know how important this is for you and just be honest. I know he may seem a little cold hearted sometimes but he must understand your situation. No matter how inhumane he may seem, he must have a mother too.”

 

Aiba’s words allowed a small chuckle to escape from Jun’s lips.

 

“Honestly, you shouldn’t be afraid of him. Try going in the morning. Right after secretary Ohno serves his coffee and he’s inside his office is the time of the day he’s most likely be in a good mood so he won’t get too rough on you.”

 

“And you know all of this, how?”

 

“I’ve had my years of experience working for him so there are a couple of things I’ve learned on the way. If I’ve made it this long, there must be something I’m doing right.”

 

“In that case… I believe you.” The way Matsumoto’s lips curled for him and the deep look in his eyes he could easily get lost in was enough to send a small heat to Masaki’s cheeks. There was something in Jun’s gaze that Aiba couldn’t seem to look away from, like a natural glow his appearance emitted that was hard for him to understand.

 

“Your drink, sir.” A new voice between them brought his thoughts back to earth when a cup of coffee was placed in front of them.

 

“I-I didn’t order any-” Said Masaki before being cut off by his friend.

 

The barista dragged a chair from another table to sit between the two office men that had seemed to be carried away by the silence of their conversation. Nino took his place rather loudly and laid back on his chair, staring at the two who he’d seem to have been taken unaware with his intrusion.

 

“Did I ask if you ordered anything?” Nino scoffed at Aiba. “You ought of start calling me next time before you come in here.” He said before turning to Matsumoto and transforming his complaint into a charming smile. “Won’t you introduce us?”

 

“Oh… Matsumoto, this-“

 

“Ninomiya Kazunari. It’s a pleasure.”

 

Jun looked confusedly at Aiba before replying. “I’m… Matsumoto Jun.” He made a small bow in greeting.

 

“Matsumoto! I’ve heard so many things about you-” Ninomiya’s chair was kicked roughly by Aiba’s foot, making his words fall short. The barista turned to his friend who threw suggestively murderous looks his way. “Anyway… thank you for taking such good care of Masaki. He may have his flaws up there but, I can assure you there is a lot more good in him to go around.”

 

“Ah, no. He is… very kind indeed.” Said Jun. His words coming in rather timidly.

 

“Thank you, Nino.” Aiba said behind clenched teeth.

 

“I mean it! He’s a little clumsy, and forgetful, and needs all the attention he can get, but he has a big… heart.”

 

“I thought you were in the middle of your shift? ” Aiba signaled him menacingly.

 

“Yeah, but I needed to take a break away from my manager. He’s been on my ass since this morning and I’m bored out of my mind! Besides, I wanted to come and say hi since you’re too busy to introduce me to your friends.”

 

“Actually, I think they might be needing you right about now…” Aiba signaled to the counter where a large line of clients was getting formed and there were only a couple of employees working between the register and the coffee machines.

 

Nino sighed profoundly with great disgust. “Why can’t I even take a minute…” he said to himself, surrendering and getting up from his chair.

 

“Anyway… are we still up for tonight? I’ve been dying for some ramen,”

 

“Yes, just… go!” Aiba brushed him off, more concerned about Jun’s impression than the number of costumers pilling up waiting for their orders to be served.

 

Finally, free from Nino’s overwhelming presence, Aiba felt he could breathe again while Jun remained quite silenced.

 

“I’m sorry about that.” He said to Jun. After finishing their lunch, both of them decided to make their way back to the office “Nino is a little… meddlesome.”

 

“He… seems like a nice guy.” Said Jun. Aiba took note to pass on the review to Nino later. He was sure it would make him very happy.

 

“I swear, he is actually very kind once you get to know him.” Said Aiba as called for the elevator.

 

“Sounds like he looks after you quite often.”

 

“He does, even though he doesn’t like to show it much.” A vacant elevator arrived, working conveniently for their conversation to carry on.

 

“He must be a very caring boyfriend…”

  
Aiba paused after pressing the button to their floor and the elevator’s door sealed completely. For a second he thought he may have heard wrong, but Jun’s insecure silence only reaffirmed his assumption. Aiba tried holding back his laughter in an attempt to not seem rude in front of Jun, but he had little success as the mere thought came back to him.

 

“I’m sorry…” Aiba soothed his last chuckles before speaking again. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

 

“No?”

 

“No, we’re just really good friends.”

 

“Oh… I see. My bad.”

 

“It’s fine. We’re pretty close and we’ve known each other for a while. It’s nothing strange.”  


“In that case… can I make another guess?” Matsumoto turned towards Aiba as the elevator rode up.

 

Aiba frowned at him, tilting his head, curious to hear whatever things he wondered about.

 

“Is… the person texting you all the time your boyfriend?”

 

Jun could trace each muscle in Aiba’s fetures as the smile he carried on his lips washed away entirely, this time replaced with a look of perplexity. All while Aiba’s hand unconsciously reached for his pocket containing his phone.

 

“…What-?”

 

The elevator opened before Aiba could utter a sentence. Jun and Masaki turned in unison to find not only the director Sakurai, but also his secretary and several other of his friends from the accounting management division. Sakurai looked inside the elevator with a frowning look at the two employees.

 

It wasn’t until Aiba finally found the ability to move and bow apologetically to the director and the rest of them that he was able to excuse Jun and himself, pulling on Jun’s sleeve to walk him out their way, feeling the director’s sight follow them before they disappeared down the corner and into the office.

 

~

 

_‘Its’ been a long day. I’m glad it’s finally over.’_

_‘Thank you for your hard work.’  
‘What got you so exhausted?’_

_‘It feels like I’ve been running all over the place,  
talking with everyone at the same time.’_

_‘I get that feeling too.’_

_‘And when I thought I was going to relax a little  
over some ramen, my friend cancels on me.’_

_‘Sorry to hear that.’_

_‘At any case, I’m glad to be home. So, for the rest  
of the evening, I’m all yours.’_

_‘In that case, I got my next question.’_

_‘After you.’_

_‘If you could describe your childhood with  
one word, what would it be?’_

_‘Interesting…’  
‘Work.’_

_‘Elaborate.’_

_‘My parents own a restaurant in our home town.  
It’s been my father’s life since before I was born.  
My mother works with him too so I spent most   
of my childhood with my grandparents. Even when I   
wanted to see my parents they always had the same  
 excuse. They were at work. And all my life I’ve been    
told it was going to be me who was next to take care  
 of the restaurant. But I didn’t want it. I didn’t want   
that work to take control of my life too.’_

_‘I think I spoke too much…’_

_  
‘No, I’m… quite impressed. I had no idea.’_

_‘I’m kind of curious to visit the restaurant now.’_

_‘But thank you for sharing that with me. Really.’_

_  
‘Well, you got a lot out of that question alone.  
You seem to be quite good at this game.’_

_‘And of course, you should visit us! It’s not too  
bad of a place.’_

_‘Alright, my turn. But what should I say…?’_

_‘Just think of a good one. Anything.’_

_‘Alright…’  
‘Do I know your name?’  
‘When I asked for your name, did you  
refuse to tell me because I’ve heard it before or…  
is it something else?’_

_‘Ask me that later.’_

_‘You’re going to avoid my question?’_

_‘If you allow me, yes. For now.  
Please, ask me something else.’_

 

_‘Alright’_

_‘In that case, tell me about your childhood.  
What kind of home did you have?’_

_‘I was quite the troublesome child, always  
seeking for attention. My parents were very busy people.’_

_‘But I admired them. And I wanted them to see me  
as something they could be proud of.’_

_‘Did you follow any of their careers?’_

_‘Not exactly.’_

_‘You could say I’m making my own way.’_

_‘That’s good that you’re doing something  
 that comes out of you.’_

_‘Yeah, I guess it is.’_

_‘Hey, you made two questions, isn’t that  
cheating?’_

_‘Oops! I’m sorry, I forgot…’_

_‘Go ahead, you can make 2 questions.’_

_‘Why advertising?’_

_‘I wanted to be part of the things that gave  
 life to my surroundings. Advertising is just   
another way of expression and the satisfaction  
 of helping build what a person wants to express   
means so much to me.’_

_‘Have you ever regretted anything in your work?’_

_‘Regardless of some everyday struggles…’_

_‘No, not a second.’_

_‘What’s the first thing you notice in a person?’_

_‘Dangerous question.’_

_‘I remembered you said I left a good impression on you.  
I wanted to know what it was.’_

_‘Usually… their posture.’_

_‘That’s too ambiguous.’_

_‘I like to see where they stand. How sure  
of themselves they are. How much effort  
they put into what they believe in. How  
they defend their ideals.’_

_‘Alright, I get it.’  
 ‘Your turn.’_

_‘Do you have any other hobbies  
you always wanted to develop?’_

_‘In my youth. I was ambitious  
and wanted to become many things. I tried sports and  
music but nothing really fit with me. I still  
have a guitar somewhere back at home but  
it’s nothing I’m too proud of.’_

_‘I would have liked to see that.’_

_‘Was it your first impression of me what made you  
decided to come up and talk to me?  In other words,   
you spoke to me because you knew, even past  
 your insecurities, I was not going to reject you?’_

_‘You’re not wrong. But… that’s not the  
only reason.’_

_‘What is it then?’_

_  
‘You will have to ask me when it’s your turn.’_

_‘Alright then, ask.’  
‘…’  
‘Anon?’  
‘…’  
‘Are you busy?’  
‘I have a feeling you’re not making your next question   
because you don’t want me to ask again.’_

_‘I’m that easy to read, aren’t I?’_

_‘It’s okay. It’s getting late, so I won’t ask now,  
but you have to promise, when I do ask again   
you will answer.’_

_‘I understand.’_

_‘Promise?’_

_‘Promise.’_

_~_

When Aiba first arrived at the office that morning, Jun was not at his desk. His things appeared to be in place so perhaps he hadn’t arrived yet. He remembered what Jun had said about his mother and for a moment he regretted not having his phone number to check if everything was okay. But he couldn’t do much for him being in the office, so if anything, he would make a good excuse to the director if it even occurred him to ask about it.

 

In addition, Nino had also disappeared without a trace after their talk yesterday. The surprise of his message came without an explanation on why he had to ask for a raincheck on their plans, so Aiba had no way of knowing if he should be worried or it was just another one of his false alarms whenever a new video game came out.

 

The next morning when Aiba arrived at the café for his first doses of caffeine and possibly to get an answer out of Nino, he still hadn’t arrived to work. One of the usual employees there could only answer he was running late, which was something Aiba thought poorly of.

 

Nino’s absence had also taken away his desire to pay for coffee so he resolved on making his own in the break room at the office. It was not the same if Nino wasn’t there to distract him. Yet he couldn’t help but find it strange that he hadn’t said a word. No matter how much Nino expressed his deep hatred for his job, he wouldn’t miss a day for a penny less on his paycheck.

 

After starting his computer, Aiba thought of grabbing his phone and resume his conversation with Anon as he had been thinking of new questions for the day. Perhaps if he used the right words, he could know at least what they were up to, or even where. If that would even make a difference, he had to know for sure.

 

A loud slam suddenly shook the floor, a noise coming from the back of the room in direction of the private office. When Aiba turned to the source of the noise, all eyes were fixed on Jun. The new employee made his way to his desk with a clearly upset look, his hand holding tightly to his papers and his eyes emitting an aura Aiba had yet to experience from him he could only address as anger.

 

Jun’s papers landed loudly on his desk, refusing to take his seat. Instead his body hovered over his desk for several seconds as he took a deep breath and let it go in a heavy sigh. Some eyes looked away, returning to their previous positions on their monitor, others like Aiba still watched over him with worry.

 

“Matsumoto-?”

  
“Can we get out of here?” Jun said before Aiba could express his concern.

 

Aiba looked at the clock displayed by the wall. It was not yet time for a break but remembering where Jun had come out from, he was willing to risk it.

 

~

 

“I don’t get it… I don’t think I’ve ever been this mad about anything related to work. You should have seen the look on his face, hell, he didn’t even look at me in the eye to say those things! All that time he was just on his phone. And his secretary was just… standing there like an idiot not doing anything. I felt laughed at, humiliated! He wouldn’t even listen to what I said!”

 

“I understand, I really do, but you need to keep your voice down.” Aiba soothed Jun who paced impatiently all over the place. Luckily this time Jun had taken them to the terrace to let himself get some air. Yet Aiba worried of any little number of employees that might be wandering around.

 

“I’m… I’m sorry. I’m just…. I can believe him.” Jun leaned on the rails next to Aiba, taking in the air that blew against their hair.

 

“What exactly did the director say to you?” asked Aiba, trying to determine a possible reason.

  
“You mean other than “No”? … He said he couldn’t give me a day off because I was still under evaluation period. That I had to complete a full 720 something hours in less than a month to pass my trial period and be legitimately enrolled in the office. And if I missed a few days of work, it would be a major setback and I could lose my post or even worst...”

 

“Then… You’d be risking your job?”

 

“Yeah… but I asked if there were any hours for sickness to use in that period and he said they only qualified for new contracts and since my case was only a promotion, it didn’t apply. What kind of a nasty joke is that?”

 

“At least he is being honest. He doesn’t want you to lose your post.”

 

“Yeah, but at what cost?” Jun brushed back his hair with a frustrating sigh. “My mother needs this surgery now… and I need to work to pay for it. I know I shouldn’t do this but… I don’t want to let her go through this alone.”

 

Aiba observed the younger with great pity, knowing there was nothing he could do to help.

 

“At least that Sakurai could’ve offered me an option to make up for those hours. Hell, I’ll come in during the weekend if he asked me to, but he wouldn’t even…” Jun bit on his tongue, not letting his words finish. “He didn’t even care, Aiba… He didn’t even look at me as I spoke.”

 

“Believe it or not, he is like that with all of us.”

 

“I’m starting to think he doesn’t care about anything but himself. The way he treats his employees… that’s no leader. He’s just an arrogant jerk.”

 

“But I’m sure he listens, I mean, he could have let you lose your job if he hadn’t told you about your evaluation period until now and it would have been worse for you-”

 

“Aiba…” Jun called him making their glances encounter one another under the sunlight. “Why are you defending him?”

 

Aiba’s words died down, realizing these weren’t the words Jun wanted to hear. Still Aiba couldn’t help but think there had to be a motive beyond his answers and the anger he caused Jun. There was simply no way this would be the director’s answer. Or was it him who had started to underestimate his cold methods? At any case, Jun was right. This was no way a leader would act.

 

~

_‘How many eyes are in the office?’_

_‘I’m guessing 60 - 70 times 2?’_

_‘At least a quarter of them have been following  
me since noon.’_

_‘How so?’_

_‘I don’t know. Maybe because of this morning  
and that I had to take a small break before lunch hours.’  
‘I hear them talking about it too.’_

_‘You think so?’_

_‘It’s starting to bother me.’  
‘I just want some coffee but I’ll feel they’ll just start  
saying I’m leaving my desk more than usual today.’_

_‘Do you need to believe any of them?’_

_‘Guess not.’  
‘I think I’m out of it today…’_

_‘Something bad happened?’_

_‘Not necessarily but… I don’t know.  
I can’t stop thinking about some things.’_

_  
‘I’m sorry.’_

_‘What for?’_

_‘I don’t know.’  
‘It felt like you needed to hear it.’_

_‘You don’t have anything to be sorry for, Anon.’_

_‘Yeah… I guess.’_

_‘Unless there is something you want  
to tell me?’_

_‘No. It’s nothing.’  
‘Just forget I said anything.’  
‘I’m just tired that’s all.’_

_‘Yeah, I understand…’  
‘I want to go home_.’

 

_‘You can talk with me if you’re bored.  
It’ll help you get your head off things.’_

_‘Are you bored too  
or am I distracting you?’_

_‘A little of both.’_

_‘So, you’re putting off your responsibilities to  
text me, that can’t be good.   
You’re making me look like I’m a bad  
influence on you!’_

_‘Indeed, you are.’_

_  
‘Fine then I’ll stop!’_

_‘Even if you stop, I can still send you messages.’  
‘I know you’re reading them so this really won’t work.’_

_‘Aiba…’_

_‘…’_

_‘I won’t stop until you text me back.’  
  
_

_‘Are you done with your  
responsibilities?’_

_‘No, but neither are you.’_

_‘At least I’m done with the important ones.  
I can leave the rest for tomorrow.’_

_‘You’re still slacking!’_

_‘_ _… ‘_

_‘I don’t want to work right now. I want to  
talk to you.’_

_‘So, I’m your excuse to procrastinate?’_

_‘Not procrastinate but… take a breather  
from everything else.’_

_‘A get away.’_

_‘My guilty pleasure.’_

_‘I’m your guilty pleasure?’_

_‘No! I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to send that.’_

_‘What did you mean then?’_

_‘I don’t know.’_

_‘I have nothing…’_

_‘Hmm… I see. This is how it is.’  
‘In that case, I might as well have  
my fun too.’_

_‘?’_

_‘Just a warning. I won’t hold back with  
my questions from now on.’_

_‘I… didn’t expect you to?’_

_‘Shh! Make your question.’_

_‘Fine.’  
‘Will you play your guitar for me some time?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘Why not?’_

_‘Wait for your turn.’_

_‘Where were you born?’_

_‘Tokyo.’_

_‘Why not?’_

_‘Because you would laugh at me.’  
‘What is your favorite food?’_

_‘Anything eatable.’_

_‘That’s too ambiguous!’_

_‘What if I promise not to laugh?’_

_‘You will! I already told you I’m not good.’_

_‘It’ll be just for me. Only a little.’_

_‘I won’t! What will you do in return,  
anyway?’_

_‘I’ll think of something.’_

_‘In that case, until then, no more questions  
about it!’_

_‘Fine! Then I’ll have to get back  
to work.’  
  
_

_‘Fine!’_

_‘Fine.’_

~

_‘Hey… I’m sorry about last night. Something  
came up.’_

_‘I figured.’_

_‘I’m still free tonight if you want to.’_

_‘Don’t know. I’m kind of tired.’  
‘But I feel there’s stuff we need to   
catch up on.’_

_‘I’m out in 15 minutes.’_

 

~~~

 

“Aren’t you going to tell me what you’ve found so far?” Nino spoke up after his friend had remained silent since they’ve arrived at the restaurant, distracted by the floating noodles in his bowl of ramen.

 

  
Aiba looked at the younger in surprise. He had been hesitating to bring up the conversation on Anon with Nino since most of his thoughts disagreed with his actions. Yet, Aiba had nothing else in mind to share over their dinner which resulted in his silence.

 

  
“You’re oddly off today. What’s on your mind?” Ninomiya frowned at his friend whose voice was almost too heavy to project. The first thing that came out of him was a sigh. “You’re thinking about them, no?” asked Nino, not at all surprised. “What did they say today?”

 

  
“It’s not what he’s saying but… what he’s not saying. I don’t understand why he needs to hide from me.”

 

  
“He is probably a creep. Big surprise.”

  


“Still… he said he wanted to meet me at first, so why is he so afraid to see me in person?”

 

  
“If he is hiding, he obviously doesn’t want you to see something. The obvious guess is he’s lying to you.”

 

Aiba stared at Nino solidly, unable to complete the thought he had started. “Why…?”

 

  
“How should I know? Try tracing back his steps. Why do you think all of this started?”

 

 

Aiba took several seconds to recollect his mental notes and memories, all the things he had seen, said and done. They were all pilled in drawers with no name, under the labels of something unknown.

 

  
“It was just an email. He was helping me with work. It wasn’t their responsibility or anything, but they still risked it to try saving me from an uncomfortable situation with the boss.”

 

 

“Then, he knows about your job, meaning he is from your office. So, the question here would be, how would he know how to help you?”

 

 

Aiba stared silently down at his bowl. “Jun arrived around that time.”

 

 

“Matsumoto? That’s your first guess?”

 

 

“I’ve seen him on his phone quite often, although it might not mean much.”

 

 

“It never hurts, go on.”

 

  
“He just moved into the office, maybe he needs someone he can depend on.”

 

  
“But why hide when he can talk to you just fine?”

 

 

“Maybe there are things he can’t say to me in person. Maybe he needs to.”  


 

“Even when he sits right next to you? It must be some sort of disorder for him to act like that.”

 

  
“They drink the same coffee.” Suddenly said Aiba, his thoughts coming faster than his words. “Anon and Jun, they like their coffee with milk.”

 

  
“So, you’re convinced? Even with how ridiculous that sounds?”

 

  
“I don’t know… But, even when I read his texts, it kind of sounds like his words. Like it could be him.”

 

  
“You like the idea of him being Anon?” Asked Nino, but his effort was vain, for he had lost Aiba to his reasoning.

 

 

“Then again… Ohno is so confusing. Why was he at the café that day? And what he said at the party, it made me think like I could have been wrong about everything and I was judging too fast. Lately, everything I hear turns into Anon, even when it’s not meant to. It’s as if…  it is all I think of.”

 

“You’re obsessed with him,” said Nino between a question and a statement, but he spoke with such a small voice, the intentions in his words barely reached Aiba.

 

 

“I… I don’t think-”

 

 

“What? That thinking about him all the time to a point where everything you hear or say or see is him is not an obsession? Then, what would you call it?”

 

 

Aiba was almost taken aback by the forwardness in his questions. “I… I’m just… curious. All we do is talk, it’s nothing serious,”

 

 

“And after that? What comes after the talks? And after you tell him all about yourself? What would you do when you find him?”

 

 

“I just want to know what I can do to help,”

 

 

“Why? Has he asked for your help?”

 

 

“N-… No, but-”

 

 

“Then, what _does_ he want? You’re giving yourself away to someone you don’t even know, and for what? He’s not even being honest with you, why are you still being baited by his lies?”

 

 

“I know he is not being completely open about himself, but he is not a liar. He is only trying to-”

 

  
“To what? Use you? Take advantage of you?” said Nino. Aiba’s words were gone as his thoughts arrived at a dead end. “Masaki… I don’t want to be harsh on you, but… I don’t want you to get fooled by someone like this either.”

 

  
“I’m not stupid, Nino.” Said Aiba, trying to hold back the tiredness of his tone. “I want to know. And no matter what you may think, he isn’t forcing me or menacing me to talk to him. I decided to do this. For myself.”

 

 

Ninomiya looked at his friend who returned to his bowl of ramen, probably intending to finish it sooner than expected. The younger simply served himself another cup, but before shooting it down his throat, the comment escapes him.

 

“Why would you give him any of your time when you don’t even know if he’s real.”

 

 

Masaki stares at Nino right after the words escaped his lips. The traces of it being choked by the alcohol he shoots down his throat like a pill. But Masaki can replay it in his mind, along with the lost look his eyes avoided to show him. And, as if he hadn’t learned his lesson, Masaki’s mind is put to work again, thinking of reasons, trying to find why, trying to imagine what Nino would be thinking to make him say such a thing, eventually coming to terms that he didn’t know the answer to his mood swing. And new questions kept drawing in, pilling one after another, learning he could have been wrong all along.

 

 

“Nino…” Aiba calls him, intending to prove his thoughts wrong. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

 

But Ninomiya was gone and his voice refused to show itself to Masaki for the rest of their meal, easily pretending he had arrived all alone to their table and possibly intending to leave as so. This was the same attitude he would put up to not be read by Aiba, when the words were too close to his lips he knew he was better off not speaking at all. By then, Aiba had lost to Nino, but he also won something that would follow him all the way back home, even though he felt bad for suspecting of his friend.

 

~~~

 

 

_‘You awake?’_

_‘Can’t sleep?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘Me neither._

_‘What’s on your mind?’_

_‘Too much. And too late for me to care.’_

_‘Feeling stressed?’_

_‘I feel like I did so many things today and  
still ended in nothing.’_

_‘So, you’re thinking in an existential matter?’_

_‘Could be.’_

 

_‘I talked to you all day, does that  
still count as nothing?’_

_‘Do you plan to talk to me all night too?’_

_‘Depends on what you’re thinking.’_

_‘I rather listen to what you have in mind.’_

_‘Hm… Another round of questions?’_

_‘Alright then.’_

_‘You have trouble sleeping?’_

_‘I don’t know, it’s almost as if I don’t know how  
to fall asleep anymore.’_

_‘That’s the worst. Have you looked up alternatives  
for sleep?’_

_‘Yeah, many. Nothing quite worked. At least not like  
the alcohol.’_

_‘I understand you perfectly.’_

_‘Have you also had trouble sleeping constantly?’_

_‘You could say so, yes.’  
‘So far I’m already use to it. But mornings  
are just awful.’_

_‘What do you think is causing it?’_

_‘I don’t know… maybe my place is too empty  
and I don’t feel comfortable in it.’  
‘And you?’_

_‘Every time I think of sleep it makes  
it harder for me to close my eyes. I think  
I’m just so drained from my work I think  
it takes away my ability to sleep too.’_

_‘That’s quite the problem.’_

_‘In what ways is your place empty?’_

_‘Since it’s just me around, I don’t feel  
completely comfortable in it. Which is weird  
I thought I would have gotten used to it by now.’_

_‘When was the last time you invited  
anyone over to your place?’_

_‘Are you asking relatives? Person of interest?’_

_‘Like girlfriend/boyfriend?’_

_‘Neither.’_

_‘Explain.’_

_‘Nor my relatives or any girlfriends/boyfriends, nothing.’  
‘I don’t like people poking into my life.’_

_  
‘Then what kind of permission did  
you grant me to poke into your life?’_

_‘You’re a special case.’_

_‘I’m special?’_

_‘By all means.’_

_  
  
_

_‘I thought I was Anon’s distraction.  
Or what did you call it…?’  
‘Your guilty pleasure?’_

_‘Yeah… sorry.’_

_‘You don’t need to. I thought it was funny!’_

_‘You think I’m funny?’_

_  
‘I think you’re a good friend.’_

_  
‘What else do you think of me?’_

_  
‘I don’t know yet. Ask me later.’_

_  
‘Nothing comes to mind?’_

_  
‘Just a little confused.’  
‘I thought I had an idea but, nothing  
is for certain. It’s like I’m back to square one.’  
‘But enough of that. It’s my turn and you made   
far too many questions.’_

_‘Sorry… my bad.’_

_  
‘Oh! I thought of some good ones in the bath!  
Do you like dancing? Or singing?’_

_‘?’  
‘I thought you said good ones.’_

_‘Hey!_ ’

_‘Your answer…?’_

_‘I don’t know what to think about either but  
I like music, does that count?’_

_‘I’ll take it.’_

_  
‘Since something came out before, I was a little curious to ask…’  
‘Any bad experiences with partners you would  
like to share?’_

_‘And I do mean boyfriend/girlfriend, whichever you  
prefer.’_

_‘Oh…’_

_‘?’_

_‘I’m sorry. I was not expecting this to  
come out. I don’t know if I want to  
think about it right now.’_

_‘Is it that bad?’_

_‘You wouldn’t believe it.’_

_‘I understand. Don’t answer it. I’m sorry  
I asked.’_

_‘Don’t worry about it.’  
‘You can make another question if you  
want to.’_

_‘No, you go ahead. I have to think of something else  
before I make things awkward again.’_

_  
‘It’s fine, really.’  
‘Maybe we can talk about it some other time  
when I’m less tired.’_

_‘Only if you want to.’_

_‘I don’t mind.’_

_‘Alright... Do you work out?’  
  
_

_‘What?’_

_‘Do you go to the gym? Regularly or have any  
sort of training?_

_‘Of course. Definitely.’_

_‘Really?’_

_  
‘Every minute of every day.’_

_‘You’re lying.’_

_  
‘I keep a lifting weight under my desk, so when I’m  
stressed out, I just take a couple of hits and I’m all better.’_

_‘Don’t be ridiculous.’_

_  
‘You’ve never noticed because I do it under my desk. That’s  
where the real party is at.’  
‘You can just ask around the office whose  
the one who lifts weights around and they’ll  
direct you to me.’_

_‘You’re not even taking my question seriously!’  
  
_

_‘Oh, so you weren’t kidding with that one?’  
  
_

_‘What are you inferring?’_

_‘I thought we were making an ironic round.’_

_‘You’re such a douche!’_

_‘It’s pronounced bodybuilder.’_

_‘ Haha!’_

_  
‘And you?’_

_‘Oh, you think you know me, but you haven’t seen  
the real Aiba Masaki yet, Anon! You’re in for a treat!’_

_‘Haha’_

_‘Thank you for today, Anon. This really means  
a lot to me.’_

_‘What does?’_

_‘Well, when I first started talking to you, I was  
very unsure of what you wanted, but I didn’t  
feel forced to do this.’  
‘It’s fun talking to you and getting to know  
 about you little by little. And even if you  
give the impression of not having any confidence  
in yourself, you’ve proven to me that you are much   
more than what you think.  
So, thank you.’_

_‘Even though you have no reason to?’_

_‘I think…’  
‘Today, I realized I do have a reason.’_

_‘What’s that?’_

_‘I could use a good friend.’_

_‘Does that mean you trust me?’_

_  
‘It means I am willing to.’_

_  
‘Then… I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?’_

_  
‘Can’t I still not see you?’  
‘It would be nice if we could have these talks  
face to face, I mean.’_

_  
‘Aiba…’  
‘Will you give me some time?’_

_  
‘For?’_

_  
‘I want to be ready.’_

_‘If that’s what you need, then gladly,  
I will wait.’_

_‘Thank you.’_

_‘Good night.’_

_‘Wait! I have one last question before you go.’_

_‘Yeah?’_

_‘That night, at the party… was it you? Did you  
serve my last glass before leaving?’_

_‘…’_

_  
‘I was almost passed out, I couldn’t see who it was,  
but I had a feeling it could’ve been you.’_

_‘Since you promised.’  
‘Am I wrong?’_

_‘...’_

_‘Please?’  
‘I won’t ask again.’_

_‘In that case…’_

_‘My answer is no.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: That's the end of Chapter 4! A lot of chats have come with this chapter and we keep learning about Anon. Jun is not left behind as he reveals a very intimate situation. But why has Jun decided to relent this on Aiba? It's starting to look like Nino has pretty harsh opinions about this whole situation but Aiba is still determined to continue his search. Thanks for reading and see you next chapter! Kudos and Comments are very much appreciated~


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: We're already in Chapter 5! An important one, nonetheless. A very special thanks for my rl friends Shion and Dhay for their very helpful tips ^^. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 

_‘Did you get a haircut?’_

_  
‘What are you assuming?’_

_  
‘I’m just curious. Did you?’_

_  
__‘If I say yes, are you going to trace down whoever_  
had a hair cut in the office?’

_  
‘If I did, would I find you?’_

_  
‘No.’_

_  
‘_ _…_ _’_

_‘Are you just saying that, so you mislead  
me into thinking you didn’t get a haircut?’_

_‘What’s with you and the haircuts today?  
I didn’t get a haircut!’_

_‘And even if I did, I wouldn’t say something  
so obvious.’_

_  
‘Then… did you get a new tie?’_

  
‘How would you know who’s wore which  
tie before?’

_  
‘I could ask around.’_

  
‘People will really think you’re a creep who  
obsesses over ties.’

  
‘Then, when I come around you,  
 would you answer me?’

_  
‘I will probably laugh.’_

_  
‘That would give you away.’_

_‘Are you sure you wouldn’t just freak out?’_

_  
‘Freak out? What do you take me for?’_

_‘Honestly? Maybe like a young kohai,  
since you do talk to me like your senpai.’_

  
‘Are you getting cocky?’  


_‘Well, you asked.’_

_‘Am I wrong?’_

_‘I never said you were.’_

_‘That doesn’t mean I’m wrong!’_

_‘No comment.’_

_‘This is supposed to be the part you confess  
your admiration towards me.’_

  
‘Says the person who comes in late  
almost every morning.’

  
‘Hmm. So, you are quite observant,  
aren’t you?’

 _  
_ _‘Rather, it’s hard to miss.’_

_  
‘I see.’_

_‘Since we are just assuming then,  
why can’t I assume anything about you?’_

  
‘I didn’t say you couldn’t,  
I’m just clarifying.’

_  
‘I think you’re just shy, that’s all.’_

_‘But that’s nothing bad.’_

_‘It’s actually cute.’_

_‘…’_

_  
‘What?’_

_‘Did you just blush?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘You’re a bad liar, Anon.’_

_‘I can see your cheeks reddening  
from here.’_

_‘What?’_

 

 

The sound of smashing glass emerged from the back of the office, suddenly. Not far from the break room the secretary was sprinkling apologies as he’d made a mess of the director’s coffee, staining the carpeted floor. He proceeded to pick up the shards when a couple of employees came to offer their help, suggesting Ohno prepared a new drink for the director right away.

 

Ohno allowed them to take care of the mess, recollect himself and moving back to the break room to start the coffee machine again. Aiba’s eyes followed as the older appeared to be shaken for no apparent reason. The question always emerging, could this have been the work of his texting?

 

This wasn’t the first time Ohno had lost his sense of direction that morning. Today had also marked the first time the secretary was running late for work. Even if it was no more than 15 minutes that Ohno took to get there, his delay was still a huge setback on the director who’d been asking for Ohno since early morning. For anyone else, making the director wait would have meant a notice of their dismissal right the next morning, but Ohno’s position was far too irreplaceable for even Sakurai to toy with.

 

 

“You think he’s okay?” Asked Jun, observing beside Aiba. But Aiba knew very well a miss of this degree would be of minor concern compared to the gravity of work Ohno managed to pull off for the director weekly.

 

 

“I don’t think he would be here if he weren’t.” Aiba returned to his phone, replying to the unanswered message displayed on his screen.

 

 

_‘I’m kidding.’_

~~~

 

That noon, Aiba decided to take a leap and invite Matsumoto for lunch, but the younger had to excuse himself this time, as he was getting prepared for his project evaluation that same day. Despite feeling defeated, Masaki understood and, after giving all his support, he compromised with visiting the café again today.

 

In truth, Masaki didn’t want to show up at the café on his own, as he was afraid he would catch Nino in a bad mood. He wasn’t sure how much more he had to listen to the millions of reasons of why his friend was against his bonding with Anon. If anything, Aiba had thought of all those consequences and perhaps even more, but gradually he had seen in Anon an understanding. That he was not luring him into danger, but instead he wanted to keep Aiba as away as possible to hide his identity. And Masaki found nothing harmful towards him in his reasons, only things harmful to Anon himself.

 

Nino had yet to understand Anon was not like any stalker he may have come across. That wanting to help Anon get out of his comfort zone was Aiba’s decision, and if that still didn’t convince Nino, he would just have to maintain his trust in Anon.

 

Once Aiba arrived at the café, he took a seat by a far side table, just the right spot where Nino could see him over the counter. The barista was still in the middle of his shift, serving coffees and taking orders with great focus. His movements trying to match the speed the orders were shot at him.

 

Aiba found himself amused as he observed the other. He could barely recall a time he had seen Nino so emerged in what he was doing, other than when he played video games. There was something noticeably different in him, like a new glow in his body he couldn’t trace. Somehow, the Nino he observed today was different from the one who sat across him at the ramen shop every other night.

  
Aiba brushed off the thought and took out his phone. The rush hour faded just in time for Nino to take a break and he moved out from the bar. Now was Aiba’s chance to make himself noticeable to him, but after not achieving Nino’s attention, he decided to leave him a message.

 

_‘Masaki at 9’o clock’_

_‘Also, a latte would make me love you.’_

The instant Masaki gazed at Nino again, he noticed the younger had already found a distraction in his phone. Masaki perceived the moment Nino’s stiff shoulders loosen and his face lit up by something that radiated in the curl of his lips. There was small reveal of teeth and light chuckle hidden under his breath that was caused by the small screen of his phone. It was a smile he hadn’t seen in him in a long time.

 

And as quickly as it happened, it faded. The whole glow was switched off, transforming his look into something Aiba couldn’t read. Until his eyes finally met with Aiba’s, as if considering his presence and he moved away, back into the bar to prepare his drink.

 

~

 

“I thought you said you were going out with Matsu-hot.”

 

Aiba rose his eyebrows at Nino. To get to a nicknaming stage, it must mean Nino really did approve of Jun. “I wouldn’t call lunch break ‘going out’, but yes. I tried asking, but he’s waiting for his evaluation with the director. I’m sure his stomach is thinking about everything but food. It was better not to bother him.”

 

“You think he would get scared of Sakurai?” Nino propped his elbow on the table, cupping his chin in his hand.

 

“I don’t consider him easy to intimidate. But it _is_ his first time with the boss. Anything could go wrong.” Aiba paused over his food to process that thought. “Oh no… You think I should have said something to him beforehand?”

 

“I guess a warning wouldn’t have hurt,”

 

“Maybe I should text him,” Masaki took out his phone which Nino glanced at with a strange look. “What am I saying? I don’t even have his number.”

 

“Text Anon instead and see what happens,” Nino’s suggestion gained him a look from Aiba. He certainly didn’t expect him to be the one to bring it up and for a moment, he was unable to tell if he was taking a wild guess or he tried to prove something. “That is… assuming he is…?”

 

“It wouldn’t hurt to try,”

 

“But what should I say?”

 

Nino shrugged. “You’re the one who’s been talking to him all this time, you should know what he would respond to.”

 

“But Anon is … His not very clear with what he says. It’s like he answers with another question,”

 

“Then stop with the questions and make a statement. He’ll keep hiding if you give him the chance to.”

 

Aiba hesitated over the keyboard, seeking the words that could give him just a speck of indication if Nino’s assumptions could be proven.

 

“Maybe, If I say _’Good luck’_ Matsumoto would know what I’m referring to?”

 

“And catch him off guard?” Nino thought about it for a second, admitting it was a solid plan before shrugging off his approval. “That works.”

 

Aiba began typing into his phone, sending the message to Anon and waiting for a response.

 

“What’s the average of Anon replying to you this time of day?”

 

Aiba started at his phone, not wanting to miss a signal of Anon’s reaction. “Usually, right away. He doesn’t like our conversations to delay.”

 

“Meaning that freak is always on his phone practically waiting for you to notice him, and that doesn’t creep you out in the slightest?”

 

“Shh! He is typing,”

 

Nino rolled his eyes, his words overpowered by the text message that popped into Aiba’s phone. “What did he say?”

 

The more Aiba’s eyes traced over the text, the more his expectant look faded. Deprived from a verbal response from the older, Nino snatched the phone from Aiba’s hands, reading over their small exchange himself. A message from the recipient reading _‘You too’_ , sitting in the bottom of the screen.

 

Aiba surrendered, his hand holding his head as a frustrated sighed escaped him.

 

“So, we’re dealing with a smartass now?”

 

“He is usually like this too…” Aiba sighed. “I don’t understand how he makes me speak so honestly with him but all he says are things that don’t give much of a lead. And he makes me believe they do, but I still have no idea of who he is.”

 

“Looks to me like you two are getting along quite well.”

 

“Yeah… he is not a bad person. He only has some trouble getting to know new people. But honestly, he is very good with words and he is very understanding. Sometimes funny, even if he doesn’t try to be. And he is trying his best to be honest, but he’s insecure about himself and that doesn’t let him be the person he really is.”

 

“Oh my god, you’re flirting with him!?” Aiba sight rose, realizing Ninomiya still held on to his phone, searching through his history of chats with a certain look of disgust.

 

“What? No! Give me that,” Aiba snatched the phone out of Nino’s hands and made a quick inspection of what he was looking at before locking it’s screen off.

 

Ninomiya restrained his words from cutting lose and instead making his thoughts readable through a perturbed gaze. Aiba ignored him knowing it would only lead for them to resume their dinner’s conversation, which he wanted to avoid most of all. Ninomiya left out a sigh.

 

“Anyway… Is there a reason for why you don’t have Jun’s number?” Asked Nino.

 

“Not in particular. I just haven’t asked, but I don’t know if it’s the right time. I mean, wouldn’t it be weird if it was him who came up to me and asked for my number?”

 

“You literally share a desk with him,” Said Nino making Aiba shift on his chair, feeling rather judged. “You’re the only person he talks to as far as you know. Isn’t that enough?”

 

“What do you expect me to tell him?”

 

“ _’Hey Matsu-hottie! I think you’re very attractive. Wanna make out some time? Give me your number,’”_

 

Masaki cringed with Ninomiya’s words. “… Fine, I’ll just stick to that last part.” Nino nodded approvingly, glad his point was proven.

 

After their words had settled, the two men were startled by a new presence at the table, making both jump as a third chair was pulled from under the table suddenly.

 

“Matsumoto!” Aiba was certainly surprised to see he had finally joined them and a little shaken he could have overheard his conversation with Nino. “W-What are you doing here? Didn’t you have your-”

 

“I did…” Said Matsumoto, his face hidden in his hand, not looking as relieved as Masaki hoped. Then again, neither was he when he had his own meeting with the director.

 

“How… did it go?” Aiba was almost afraid asking would displease him, but he couldn’t help but address his frustration.

 

Matsumoto sighed heavily. “I guess I know why nobody likes that jerk.”

 

Aiba couldn’t say he was surprised. “If it makes you feel better, he treats everyone just the same.”

 

“Did he say you were underperforming after you’ve done nothing but meet with deadlines and hand every single damn report they ask for?” Said Matsumoto out of annoyance more than wanting to raise his voice at Aiba.

 

Ninomiya snickering gained not only Aiba’s but Jun’s stare. “That guy is insane. Seriously, what do they expect you to pull out of your ass?” Aiba’s eyes widened at him warningly. He could never be too careful with Nino’s sharp tongue.

 

“I don’t know…” Jun responded, his voice reflecting the opposite of joy.

 

“Did you try defending your point in a way he could understand?” Asked Masaki.

 

“I did everything I could! I didn’t want it to get out of hand but… I think a word or two must have slipped out.”

 

“You talked back at him?” Asked Aiba, exchanging a look with Nino.

 

“What else could I have said? He thought I was incompetent, saying I’ve been wasting my time and that I had nothing done! I had to defend myself somehow. I wasn’t going to let him degrade my work. That was the most unproductive evaluation I’d ever been in. Instead of saying all I did wrong, why won’t he just say what he wants from his employees? It’s not like I can read his mind.” Matsumoto drew a sigh, trying to relax his body, and remember he was no longer in the conference room, nor was he being stared at by the director’s judging look. “I did bad, didn’t I?”

 

“It wouldn’t be smart to lose your job in the first month.” Remarked Nino not being of much help to ease Jun’s state.

 

“Don’t overthink it too much,” It was Aiba’s turn to comfort him. “Just focus on what you have to do and it’ll be up to him to recognize your effort.”

 

“Wont they give him a break?” Stepped in Nino. “Let the poor man make his mistakes first before throwing him away?”

 

Aiba shook his head. “Director Sakurai is… hard to please.”

 

“Hard to please?” Nino rolled his eyes. “Someone ought to teach that guy how to lay it off. You can’t expect everyone to be on his same level when they’ve just started. Doesn’t he notice that cutting everyone off is just disrupting that progress even more? On top of that, for things that could be worse! People like him really make me wish someone gave him a taste of his own medicine. But, who knows, I could be judging him wrong. It’s not you guys’ fault however long he’s gone without getting laid.”

 

“Nino!” Aiba said warningly.

 

“It’s obvious! Why else would you’ve been sucking on that jerk all these years?” Ninomiya leaned in closer to their table lowering his voice for only them to hear. “If he ever fires either of you, just make it so that he regrets it.”

 

Aiba knew Nino only said what was fair but he couldn’t help but feel his circumstances were wrong. Aiba was certain the director’s constant dismissal of employees was not an act Sakurai particularly took pleasure of as everyone thought. He trusted Sakurai’s judgment had to be different when it came to the sake of the company, that’s why he only demanded the best performance and the best results. Therefor Aiba would never be able to please Nino’s call for revenge, not while it was unfair to their company and his coworkers.

 

Aiba turned to both men at either side of the table and noticed the deep gaze Matsumoto had lost himself in, as if he had considered Ninomiya’s word for a second. He must still be bitter from his meeting and if anything, Nino’s words would indulge him better than anything Aiba could say now.

 

~

 

_‘Good Morning.’_

_‘The train is more crowded than usual.  
Wonder if there’s something going on today.’_

_‘I’m sorry, I completely lost track of time.’_

_‘Did Anon just oversleep?’_

_‘Is it so surprising?’_

_‘You know that probably means I’m rubbing off on you.’_

_‘Oh no…’_

_‘You really are a bad influence on me.’_

_‘You’re welcome!’_

_‘Still… I’m closer than you, seeing that you’re  
taking the train right now.’_

_‘What!? How?’_

_‘Guess I haven’t quite been cursed yet.’_

_‘Do you live that close to the company?’_

_‘Who knows?’_

_‘Good luck getting here on the mark.’_

_‘Thanks…’_

~

 

The line at the elevators didn’t seem to be getting any smaller. When a new elevator finally arrived, it became so cramped the person before Aiba asked him to take the next one. Although he complied, Aiba cursed under his breath, knowing his timing couldn’t have been worse.

 

He clicked on the controls several times, hoping he still had a gap to make it before they would notice his absence. Finally, his pleas were responded with the next elevator turning up, with a single person getting off that same floor. A person Masaki turned to look at twice before realizing he had seen before. But his presumption was not confirmed until he caught a glimpse of the other’s profile, which he recognized from seeing almost every single day.

 

He felt an urge, almost a reflex, to call Kazama’s name, having heard nothing of his friend for a long time and finally finding him here. But the elevator would’ve closed on Masaki, if it wasn’t for his quick reaction to hold the doors. The more he hesitated to call him, the further Kazama walked away. With just a look from his wrist watch, he resolved it was not the right time.

 

After marking his floor, he could at least rest assured he would make it today, but because he didn’t seem to be learning his lesson, he wrote a mental note to fix the mess he’d made of his morning schedule soon.

 

The doors were abruptly stopped yet again by a new hand. Immediately noticing someone’s attempt to get in, Aiba helped holding the doors so they would slide open again, just so he would immediately regret it.

 

Perhaps it was the expectation of it being another employee running late, that finding the director by the door step seemed like a setback to his morning, or perhaps the fact that this would be the second time he had to get off an elevator to provide the director the ‘honor’ to ride it on his own.

 

Nevertheless, Masaki bowed to him respectfully and began to step out of the elevator when Sakurai held up a hand, signaling him to stop.

 

Aiba froze on his feet when instead Sakurai stepped into the elevator and marked his floor on the panel, letting the elevator doors close with them still inside.

 

Aiba stiffened as the elevator started to ascend. Was this legal? Wasn’t he breaking some sort of rule? Wasn’t the secretary the only one capable of standing so close to the director? Where was Ohno anyway? The questions in Masaki’s head came as quickly as the floors they rode past, the air inside the compartment of the elevator growing tighter as a daunting silence stood between them.

 

Aiba’s sight rose to Sakurai, standing a little more than half a meter from him. He couldn’t think of a time he’d stood beside him for more than a second. He wondered if this was what Ohno felt every moment of every day when he accompanied Sakurai everywhere. He was surprised to see just how clean and sharp his outfit really was. Masaki turned away quickly realizing he must have stared for too long and returned to look down, trying to make himself as miniscule as he could.

 

The elevator began to halt before finally opening its doors on an unfamiliar floor. Sakurai blurted what seemed like the smallest “Good day” Masaki had ever heard and walked out. It was strange to see him stop at a different department from their own, but he supposed he had his own work to take care of.

 

The elevator doors closed again and Aiba felt every muscle in his body relaxing. He hadn’t even arrived at the office and he’d already felt like he had gone through a stressful morning. Aiba leaned against the walls of the elevator, taking a deep breath just to be startled right back again with a tremendous clang and the sudden halt of the elevator that made the whole floor under him tremble.

 

~

 

_‘Anon?’_

_‘Are you there?’_

_‘Always.’_

_‘I’m sorry, this may seem like a bother to you.’_

_‘You know it never is.’_

_‘Then… will it be fair that I ask something  
from you?’_

_‘If it’s in my capability, I suppose  
I could help.’_

_‘Are you in the office?’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Would you go to the elevator for me?’_

_‘Wouldn’t it be a little too obvious?’_

_‘Look at my desk.’_

_‘I’m not there, right? You don’t have to_  
worry about me seeing you,  
so would you please help me?’

_‘Alright, just give me a second.’_

_‘Call for the elevator.’_

_‘Did you do it?’_

_‘I’m waiting.’_

_‘Let me know which one comes up.’_

_‘Right side.’_

_‘And the left side?’_

_‘It doesn’t look like it’s coming up.’_

_‘I can’t see which floor it’s on either.’_

_‘I think it’s between the 28th and 30th,  
I don’t know.’_

_‘Aiba, what’s going on? Where are you?’_

_‘Are you inside the elevator?’_

_‘Yeah.’_

_‘I’ve been trying to call from the emergency line,  
but it’s not working.’_

_‘The whole system seems to be down.  
I can’t even open the door.’_

_‘I didn’t know what else to do.’_

_‘Why didn’t you tell me sooner?’_

_‘How long have you been there?’_

_’10 minutes, more or less.’_

_‘And it just occurred to you?’_

_‘Are you hurt?’_

_‘Is it just you in there?’_

_‘Do you feel dizzy?’_

_‘Is the AC still working?’_

_‘Aiba?’_

_‘I’m fine. I’m not hurt. Yes, it’s just me._  
I don’t feel strange or anything, but a little warm.  
The AC isn’t working either.’

_‘Damn it, Aiba.’_

_‘Please hold on, I’m getting help.’_

_‘Thank you.’_

_‘Are you mad?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I’m sorry.’_

_‘Don’t. This wasn’t your fault.’_

_‘I’m sorry I’m making you worry so much.’_

_‘Anyone would do the same.’_

_‘Not like you.’_

_‘…’_

_‘Others would be worried that someone was_  
stupid enough to get stuck in an elevator,  
but you worry about me, genuinely, and  
that is something I can’t thank enough, Anon.’

_‘I’m bound to worry about you.’_

_‘As a friend?’_

_‘Of course.’_

_~_

_‘Someone just arrived. They’ll be working_  
with the elevator panel to see if it’s a malfunction.  
If not, they’ll have to check the power line.’

_‘That’s good to hear.’_

_‘How are you?’_

_‘It’s somewhat hot in here, but nothing  
I can’t stand.’_

_‘How’s the office?’_

_‘Slow and noisy since the fire brigade is_  
working on our floor. The secretary is trying  
to get them back to work.’

_‘It’s a mess, isn’t it?’_

_‘And the director?’_

_‘He spoke with the fire brigade already._  
He wants them to be finished as quickly as  
possible so everyone can get back to work.’

_‘He looks very stressed.’_

_‘Really? That’s… surprising.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘He usually never leaves his office.’_

_‘Would he be the director if he did?’_

_‘Guess not.’_

_~_

_‘Are you bored?’_

_‘If by that you meant to ask if I have_  
anything better to do in here,  
then yes, I am bored.’

_‘I suppose I could keep you company.’_

_‘Don’t you have work to do?’_

_‘Everyone is distracted,_  
I don’t see why I can’t take a break  
and distract you for a while too.’

_‘Alright then, carry on.’_

_‘Is this the first time you’ve been  
caught in such a tight situation?’ _

_‘Haha, very funny.’_

_‘At this degree, yes, I suppose._  
Although I have been locked out of my  
own apartment may times, does that count?’

_‘Of course. Your turn.’_

_‘Do you usually panic like just now when  
 I told you I was here?’_

_‘I didn’t panic.’_

_‘It sure seemed like you did,_  
asking all those questions,  
calling the fire brigade.’

_‘I just delivered the message.’_

_‘And I’m thankful for that.’_

_‘Why were you running late again today?’_

_‘I didn’t hear my alarm. It hasn’t been enough_  
 to wake me up lately. I should really take  
care of that soon.’

_‘You think I wouldn’t be stuck here if  
I hadn’t over slept?’_

_‘I’m pretty sure.’_

_‘That is just how fortunate I am.’_

_‘Do you usually carry such bad luck?’_

_‘I do.’_

_‘In some things, more than others.’_

_‘Like what exactly?’_

_‘Relationships, I guess.’_

_‘Oh.’_

_‘I’m sorry I made two in a row.’_

_‘That’s fine.’_

_‘Have you ever been in a serious relationship, Anon?’_

_‘… I can’t say I haven’t.’_

_‘Are we having this type of conversation now?’_

_‘It might be so.’_

_‘Would you tell me about it?’_

_‘You seriously want to hear about  
my past relationships?’_

_‘Yes. Why? Can I not ask?’_

_‘Hm…’_

_‘Just get on with it!’_

_‘You wanted to distract me no?_

_‘Fine…’_

_‘It was some time ago, I don’t think I was even_  
 working for the company as I am now. I started  
seeing someone I met through family and friends.  
They wanted us to be together more than ourselves.  
It was nothing memorable. It lasted over a couple of  
months. That’s all.’

_‘Was it forced?’_

_‘I wouldn’t call it that.’_

_‘Then, why? Didn’t you like them?’_

_‘It didn’t work out for me, although  
she tried more than me.’_

_‘She?’_

_‘I’m sorry, I must have misunderstood you.’_

_‘Don’t think about it too much. ‘_

_‘My turn?’_

_‘Mhm.’_

_‘I know you mentioned some time ago you’ve_  
had bad experiences with partners. Would you  
enlighten me on that now?’

_‘True, I had my bad ones. Unfortunately,  
they are larger in number than the good ones.’_

_‘I want to hear them.’_

_‘All of them?’_

_‘If it’s possible.’_

_‘That’s a lot of bad dates.’_

_‘It’s your chance to rant. You can tell me anything.’_

_‘Fine, just a couple. I want to make more  
questions.’_

_‘After you.’_

_‘But where should I start?’_

_‘First love?’_

_‘High School, second year. They were my senior._  
It started around our summer break, they asked me  
to the festival and unfortunately, I agreed to go.’

_‘Unfortunately?’_

_‘We spent the evening together, I thought he_  
must have liked it so much he kissed me.  
He asked me out again for another time and  
 I selfishly agreed. Weeks after we’ve been going out  
 and keeping things between us, I find him talking to  
his friends about a bet. That they would pay him even  
more if he kissed me at the movies.’

 _‘That was the end of it for me and I pretended he didn’t exist._  
It wasn’t easy when he still followed me around wondering  
why I was mad at him, but eventually, he understood.’

_‘Aiba… I’m so sorry.’_

_‘It’s in the past. I don’t mind anymore.’_

_‘Maybe… It was wrong of me to ask.’_

_‘What? You didn’t believe me when I said they  
were bad?’_

_‘I did, it’s just… I shouldn’t be asking you to  
revive those memories.’_

_‘I’ve repressed them enough. It’s fine, Anon, really.’_

_‘Alright… But if you want to stop, just say it.’_

_‘I will.’_

_‘But I still want to hear what your first love was like.’_

_‘It is only fair.’_

_‘College, first year. My roommates dragged me_  
to a party after our winter break finals. I met them  
there, we had our drinks, a few stares and a couple  
of songs later, we got into talking. We bonded over  
our boredom and sneaked out. It was only talk and  
dying under the cold night but their company somehow  
made it warmer. At some point they suggested we dipped  
 into the college ground pool but it was way too cold for any  
of us to agree. Instead they invited me to their dorm where  
 they promised me heat but I had to refuse. I knew what they  
wanted, but I just couldn’t give it to them. I’d never done  
something like that before so I suppose I felt very nervous  
 and refused.’

 _‘After that night I never saw them again on campus._  
I found out they weren’t even a student, but some student’s  
relative that lived abroad and had only returned for the winter.’

_‘If you would have known that sooner,  
would you have slept with them that night?’_

_‘I thought about that many times…  
The me back then would have said yes.’_

_‘And the you right now?’_

_‘I think it’s better this way. It’s not like it was  
my first and last.’_

_‘Alright I suppose it’s my turn. Tell me about  
a date that wasn’t a total disaster.’_

_‘Hmm… that’s a tough one. It’s not like I go out_  
 with people all the time. I’ve only been  
in 3 relationships.’

_‘And were any of those worth it?’_

_‘One learns. Maybe I would have made the same  
mistake with someone else.’_

_‘That’s true.’_

_‘A not-so-total-disaster, huh? I suppose my second_  
relationship didn’t end as badly. He was sweet  
and all but there simply was no communication.  
Hell, I think he forgot I even existed sometimes.  
He just never took care of me enough.’

_‘I’m sorry, you lost me at “Forgot I even existed”.’_

_‘He never texted or called me. He never invited me out,_  
 I was always the one arranging dates.  
He always wanted me to go to him but never  
the other way around. There was no compromise.  
I didn’t want that. Eventually, I got a feeling that he  
was trying to get rid of me as if I was a burden, so I left.’

_‘I have another question if I may.’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Have you dumped all of your boyfriends?’_

_‘Now that you mention it… yes.’_

_‘I see.’_

_‘What about you?’_

_‘Did you dump her?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I did.’_

_‘Because you didn’t love her?’_

_‘Because she was not what I wanted.’_

_‘Go ahead, make your question.’_

_‘I suppose… your third and last relationship?’_

_‘Right…’_

_‘Two years ago, I met him at a restaurant I use to frequent._  
I saw him occasionally until we found the guts to talk.  
We got to know each other more and started going out.  
 It’s the longest I’ve been with anyone and the longest  
 anyone has lied to me. I still don’t know why he decided  
 to tell me himself, that he was married and had a family,  
 I don’t know why he confessed it to me like that.  
But I was really mad.’

 _‘At him for all he did for me that time we were together_  
and at myself for feeling the smallest bit forgiving  
because he at least had the guts to tell me himself.’

 _‘It’s been 8 months since we broke up._  
 I haven’t given myself the chance to look for anyone  
 else since then.’

_‘I will stop here.’_

_‘Alright.’_

_‘I have something to ask that it wasn’t  
very clear to me.’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Was your first love a woman too?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I suppose I have to say no.’_

_‘Oh, okay.’_

_‘Then, you haven’t been in love with anyone else?’_

_‘For a while, no.’_

_‘Not even your friend?’_

_‘My friend…?’_

_‘The coffee boy.’_

_‘Nino? No! He is just a close friend.’_

_‘Gosh, why does everyone think we’re together?  
We are not!’_

_‘Sorry. It wasn’t very clear to me.’_

_‘Don’t get me wrong, he is a great guy,  
but we’ve never thought of it that way.’_

_‘Why not?'_

_‘I guess we just want different things.’_

_‘What do you want?’_

_‘Me… I’ve always wanted what everybody had._  
Someone I can trust. Someone who loves me.  
Truly loves me. I don’t want to be a bet, a burden  
nor a second choice. I want genuine feelings,  
something honest. Real.’

_‘I’m asking for too much, I know.  
Yet if I were given the choice, it wouldn’t hurt to ask.’_

_‘Believe me when I tell you, that is what  
you deserve.’_

_‘What do you want, Anon?’_

_‘Me…?’_

_‘Do you know?’_

_‘I do.’_

_‘Then?’_

_‘I want you to get out of there. It’s been hours.  
I don’t know why they are taking so long.’_

_‘It must be serious then.’_

_‘How much time do they need to waste fixing  
one elevator?’ _

_‘Thank you.’_

_‘For?’_

_‘You worrying about me somehow makes me calm.’_

_‘I suppose someone has to.’_

_‘But, why are you worrying?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Anon, are you in love with someone?’_

 

The elevator made a tremendous rumble before it’s lights and controls came back to life, shaking as it began to ascend once more. Masaki, who sat by a corner of the compartment, barely had the time to recollect himself before the elevator stopped once again, this time opening its doors and revealing his floor. A group of firemen, the same ones who worked on the elevator, received him at his exit.

 

Masaki quickly hopped on his feet, bowing, and thanking the firemen profoundly, before finally stepping out of the elevator as he could finally catch his breath again. He didn’t take more than two steps before he was clutched by Matsumoto, who held his arms tightly and worriedly.

 

“Are you okay? Are you hurt? What the hell happened in there?” Immediately the questions flowed out of his lips and Masaki could barely follow them by the sudden closeness of their bodies.

 

“Let him breathe.” The next voice that stood between them made even Masaki collect himself. The director approached them, his presence so unexpected, Masaki didn’t have time to think of what to do first; either to apologize or greet him.

 

But director Sakurai didn’t seem to be asking for a formal salute when he walked up to them, even when he wore that stern look that was almost imprinted in his eyes. For a few moments, there was nothing other than silence, as if something was taken in and released by Sakurai’s sigh.

 

“Are you okay?” Sakurai addressed him directly, perhaps for the first time not avoiding his gaze.

 

Aiba hesitantly nodded, afraid his response could be the wrong one he answered. “I’m… fine, sir.”

 

Sakurai nodded, confirming his words with his well-being, regardless of the sweat that stained Aiba’s shirt. Before Aiba could realize it, he felt a light weight patting on his shoulder as the director turned away. Closely behind him, it was Ohno’s turn to approach him, carrying a bottle of water which he handed over to Masaki with a slight bow, before turning away and returning to the director’s side.

 

For a second, his abrupt expression had paralyzed Aiba, but luckily Jun was there to prove it as well. That regardless of the constant rumors, the director did have a side of him that could sympathize with his employees.

 

~

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to take the stairs?” Said Jun to Aiba after the two had logged off their desktops and gathered their things to end their long laboring day.

 

Aiba sighed for the third time. “I’m not climbing down 24 floors versus barely seconds in the elevator.”

 

Matsumoto rose a brow at him. “So, you’re sure you’re not traumatized what-so-ever?”

 

“Positive.” Said Aiba, calling for the elevator hopefully for the last time that day.

 

“I’m surprised. It’s almost as if that time you spent in there was nothing.”

 

“Almost…” repeated Aiba as both men stepped into the empty elevator and marked for the lobby.

 

“Why, what were you doing in here?” Jun looked around as if he would find an answer there, only to earn a chuckle from Aiba at his poor attempt. The sound of Masaki’s hidden laugh gained a look from the younger. “You know, I was really worried.” Added Jun, his eyes never leaving Aiba even when his attention was caught on his phone to a message that had been ignored the whole day.

 

“You were?”

 

“When I heard someone was stuck and I saw your empty desk… I had a bad feeling. I couldn’t even work for the rest of the morning.”

 

Aiba paused, taking in the words that Jun spoke next to him. “How did you know it was me?” He said, his gaze encountering the other in the silence of the elevator, taking Jun’s words away.

 

Jun cleared his throat as he busied himself looking at his hands. “I had a feeling… it must have been you.”

 

 _A feeling_. Aiba repeated this on his mind, wondering why he would be the type to worry so much from a hunch?

 

“I’m trying to say…” Jun’s words came out little by little. Although Aiba wasn’t trying to pressure him, he wanted to hear more. “I couldn’t help you, trapped in here all by yourself. It made me regret that I don’t have your phone number.”

 

Aiba’s eyes slightly widened. It certainly was a bold move coming from him, but it was better than what Nino could possibly suggest him. Jun didn’t have to ask twice for Masaki to give him his number, if anything it’ll surely score him points with Ninomiya.

 

The elevator arrived at the lobby shortly after and Aiba was ready to part ways before the other’s words had stopped him.

 

“I’m sure you’ve had one hell of a day and… I don’t know if it’s too sudden, but…” Aiba could barely follow Jun’s words by the delay they took to form out of his lips, but Aiba was sure that the subtle nervousness that hinted in his voice made that man even more adorable. “Are you busy… tonight?” It wasn’t until he uttered this words that Aiba found himself heedless, almost missing his lead. And even when he recalled what he’d said, he wasn’t too convinced they were right. A long second passed after another, where Aiba lost himself inside his piercing eyes, waiting for an answer to form in his mind, or anything that would let Jun know if he’d blown his chance or not. “That is… if you want to-”

 

“Hey, I’ve been looking for you!” This was the first time Aiba had heard Nino’s voice coming up behind him and felt such relief. Finally, Aiba could turn towards something that wasn’t Jun’s eyes or the floor. “Are you ready to go?” Nino asked, clearly taking notice of Jun and the ambience between them far too late.

 

“N-Nino! I almost forgot…” Aiba said suddenly. “I promised I would take him out tonight. I’m so sorry. Can we reschedule?” He said to Jun this time.

 

“Oh… sure.” He uttered rather doubtfully. “Then… I’ll see you tomorrow?”

 

“Of course! Good night.” Aiba gave him the most sympathetic smile he could manage and with a big pain in his heart seeing Jun’s faded look, he walked away as fast as he could, pulling on Ninomiya’s sleeve to follow behind him.

 

“Would you care to explain what the hell was that about?” Asked Ninomiya, trying to keep up with Aiba’s pace as they exited the company building. “Did you just do what I think you did?”

 

“I’m sorry, okay? You’re going to yell at me for that too?” His voice sounded rather upset, which only concerned Nino even more.

 

“But, what if he’s- “

 

Aiba stopped short on his tracks, letting go of Nino and letting his heart beat settle down once again. “That’s what I’m afraid of.”

 

~

 

“So, he asked for your number, meaning he’s not Anon?” Nino spoke from the floor of Masaki’s apartment, as he fumbled in his phone games.

 

“But Anon’s been so careful so far. This is exactly what he would do to take away my suspicions of him, no? I mean, he has lied before, why wouldn’t he do the same now?” Aiba laid on his sofa, his phone lying flat on his stomach waiting for the slightest sign of life from Anon, but if he hadn’t texted him throughout the rest of the day, he had no chance to believe he would respond to him now.

 

“Hmm… I thought you said he was honest with you.”

 

“I’m not stupid, Nino.” Said Aiba, not letting him rub salt into his wound.

 

“Then how come you still don’t know what he wants form you? I thought you should have known by now.”

 

“Believe me, I tried.”

 

“Why is he ignoring you anyway?” the ringing of his phone games toned down, giving Aiba the chance to think straight.

 

Aiba looked at his phone to find no notifications waiting for him. “Maybe he is scared. Maybe I spoke too soon.”

 

“Maybe it’s not what he answers but what happens after.” Nino spoke the first words that meant something to Aiba. “Have you thought about that?”

 

Aiba looked at Nino from the sofa, his eyes still very lost in thought. When he couldn’t find an answer, he returned to look at his ceiling as if he would find it there, but there was nothing more left to think about other than how tired he had become after what seemed like the longest day.

 

~

 

After realizing it had begun to rain, Ninomiya decided to stay the night and take the sofa. Aiba had moved to his bed, trying to find that sleep that’d kicked in while he talked to Nino but shortly realized his mind was clouded once again with his unanswered message.

 

After a couple of hours of tossing around, he became irritated by even the position of his pillows. He rearranged himself once again and in the meantime, took hold of his phone. The screen illuminated the room as he searched for his recent messages and started to type.

 

_‘I’m sorry if I asked something out of place’_

_‘I didn’t mean to upset you.’_

 

He relieved now that the words had come out of his chest, but also a self-conscious feeling hit him, making him wish he could erase the message when it was too late. He set his phone on his night table and hid himself under the covers. Gradually, the tiredness finally began to kick in, starting to drift him off into a dream only to be startled back awake when his phone rang. His eyes shot open confirming it had not been his imagination, seeing his room illuminated by his phone’s light. It had to be…

_‘What makes you think I’m upset?’_

_‘You haven’t spoken all day… since I came out of the elevator.’_

_‘I’ve been thinking that’s all.’_

_‘About?’_

_‘Don’t worry about it.’_

 

Masaki knew those words weren’t going to let him return to sleep. His fingers typed into the keyboard.

 

_‘Anon?’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Why did you start texting me?’_

_‘What is the reason you spoke to me?’_

_‘I need to know.’_

_‘You promised you would tell me when I asked again.’_

_‘Please… I need you to tell me.’_

_‘Anon...?’_

_‘I like you.’_

 

Masaki sat up in his bed, his eyes never darting away from his phone even when it hurt to even look at the screen.

 

_‘Make your next question.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘Because I need to ask you something and it’s your turn.’_

_‘I have nothing to say.’_

_‘Ask.’_

_‘Are you hiding yourself to protect me?’_

_‘Are you hiding from me because it is against office policy?’_

_‘It could be.’_

_‘If the truth comes out, we could get in trouble.’_

_‘Most likely.’_

_‘Then, can I ask you something?’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Now that you know why, would you stop texting me?’_

_‘Do you want me to stop?’_

_‘I don’t want you to think I had bad intentions.’_

_‘I don’t.’_

_‘I won’t judge you like that, Anon.’_

_‘Then?’_

_‘I don’t know what to say.’_

 

His hands fell over his lap, holding on to his phone tightly as he searched for the words in the darkness of his room.

 

_‘Thank you.’_

_‘For being honest with me. For answering me.  
For your feelings. I am very grateful.’_

_‘Just grateful.’_

_‘I wish I could give you the answer you deserve but…  
that is all I can say.’_

_‘Your honesty is enough.’_

_‘Will this make things awkward between us?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I don’t think I’m ready to stop talking to you.’_

_‘If you still want to talk to a stalking creep  
 like me then, that’s up to you.’_

_‘I won’t pressure you on any further.’_

_‘No. You’re not a creep.’_

_‘You’re my friend.’_

_‘Yeah… I guess so.’_

_‘You are.’_

_‘And as my friend, I won’t abandon you.’_

_‘When I’m ready, I promise I’ll give you the answer you deserve.’_

_‘There is no need for you to.’_

_‘I will.’_

_‘You kept your promise.’_

_‘It’s what a real friend would do.’_

_‘You don’t have to pity me.’_

_‘I don’t.’_

_‘I just don’t want you to go.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘I… don’t know yet.’_

_‘Will you tell me when you do?’_

_‘It’s a promise.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 5. Anon has confessed! Aiba's reactions seems to be a little different than what Anon expected, but why? Will this change anything from now on? Thanks for reading and see you next chapter~!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Welcome to Chapter 6! We're already half way through our story. What new things will Anon reveal to us this time? As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. A very special thanks to my rl friend Dhay for her support ^^. Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 6

                                     

 

“… The cables were cut. Someone down at maintenance saw them.”

 

“Scary… Who would even do such a thing?”

 

“It’s obvious. Only an employee would know their way around.”

 

“You think _he_ had something to do with it?”

 

“I heard it wasn’t just _him_ in there. Some people from marketing saw the director get off on their floor and they said he wasn’t alone.”

 

“He must have persuaded the director to use the elevator with him.”

 

“I wouldn’t be surprised. He’s been breathing down the secretary’s neck for weeks.”

 

“He must have done it on purpose. Trying to make the director pity him.”

 

“He’s only trying to get on his good side.”

 

“If that’s the case, I can’t wait to see what the director will do-”

 

The groups of voices suddenly muted when Aiba stepped into the break room. Regardless of not feeling the least bit welcomed, Masaki slightly bowed his head as he greeted them “good morning”. Their eyes scanned him before moving away, engaging in murmured chatter as they returned to their desks. Masaki sighed for perhaps the eleventh time that morning before starting the coffee machine.

 

Returning to his desk had never felt like such a difficult task. As he tried to find some silence with his cup of coffee, another pair of his coworkers engaged in whispers, at least two cubicles down from his.

 

“I heard they found a camera in there too.”

 

“No way! What were they even trying to do?”

 

“Who knows? They couldn’t even find anyone in security, which means, it must have been someone from inside. Probably whoever used the elevator last.”

 

“Which means _he_ …”

 

“…Right?”

 

“The director sure is lucky.”

 

Masaki thought of leaving his desk again if only he could go back to the break room and drink his coffee quietly yet walking down the office would only stir their talk more. He understood he had to stay in his seat, even if it meant he couldn't take out his phone. The last thing he wanted was to cause chaos with their speculations. He only wished time passed faster so he could finally get some fresh air, and possibly have someone to talk to.

 

Matsumoto witnessed Aiba’s twelfth sigh that morning. His coworker’s fingers worked loudly on his keyboard, as if he was trying to mute the sparse chatter around them. If it were Jun, he would have already spoken his mind to draw away their ridiculous assumptions, but he knew the last thing Aiba would want would be to bring more attention to himself. Jun resented being too much of a coward to do anything, but there was still something in him that couldn’t let it go.

 

~

 

_‘Anon?’_

_‘I had a feeling you would come around.’_

_‘Hi. Sorry, I’ve been occupied.’_

_‘It’s only natural.’_

_‘You can text me first too, you know?’_

_‘I was wondering if you would.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘Because of last night?’_

_‘…’_

_‘What? Are you going to bury your head  
in the sand every time I mention it?’_

_‘Forget about it.’_

_‘Shy as always, I see.’_

_‘You’re going to mock me now?’_

_‘No, I think it’s refreshing.’_

_‘And don’t worry, Anon. Your secret  
 is safe with me.’_

_‘What are you up to? Heading for lunch?’_

_‘I don’t know. I thought of skipping lunch today.’_

_‘That’s strange. Last person who skipped a meal  
around here had to go through quite an earful.’_

_‘Today is very… strange, I guess.’_

_‘I don’t see you around. Are you not in  
the office?’_

_‘I stepped out a little early. I’m in the terrace,  
trying to get some fresh air.’_

_‘Everything okay?’_

_‘A little suffocated.’_

_‘?’_

_‘Have you even been in the office  
 today, Anon?’_

_‘What?’_

_‘You’re not seriously listening to what’s  
been going around, are you?’_

_‘How could I not? When they’ve been at it all day,  
pretending I don’t know it’s me they’re talking about.’_

_‘They’re saying I was trying to trap the director?_  
Who would seriously believe that? What do they think  
 I would have gotten out of it, when I was all by   
myself in there?’

_‘All I did was ride an elevator with him and suddenly  
 I’m a suspect for attempted murder.’_

_‘Things seem to spread fast.’_

_‘Not faster than their stupid gossips.’_

_‘I just needed to get away from everyone for a while.’_

_‘Last thing I need is for administration to interrogate  
 me because of what they’re saying.’_

_‘Believe me, they won’t.’_

_‘How can you be so sure? If they hear I tried_  
to threaten the director, even if it’s just rumors,  
 I’ll lose my job for sure.’

_‘They wouldn’t pay mind to a minor office rumor.’_

_‘Why wouldn’t they?’_

_‘Aiba, it’s just gossip. You wouldn’t believe the things  
 they would come up with just to get out of boredom.’_

_‘And this time it just happened to be me.’_

_‘Ignore them. They don’t deserve your concern._  
Making you look guilty won’t make them any more   
important. And if you show them it gets to you,   
they’ll just keep going. So, forget about them and just  
 be glad that nothing too serious happened. At any case,   
you were the only one who was there. Only your word counts.’

_‘…’_

_‘You’re right.’_

_‘I’m letting this get to my head. I’m sorry.’_

_‘Besides, they’re probably just jealous because  
you rode the elevator with the director.’_

_‘In other words, I probably rebelled against  
everyone in the office.’_

_‘Probably.’_

_‘It makes sense. They’re just looking for  
 something to complain about.’_

_‘That’s right.’_

_‘Thank you, Anon. My mind’s been all over  
 the place this week.’_

_‘How come you always know what to say?’_

_‘I’ve gotten better at it I guess.’_

_‘I appreciate it, really.’_

_‘I have to admit, it was weird.’_

_‘What was?’_

_‘Standing next to him.’_

_‘The director?’_

_‘He looked like a statue. Rigid.  
Except he smelled nice.’_

_‘You make odd observations.’_

_‘I get that a lot from Nino.’_

_‘Talk to you later.’_

_‘Sure.’_

_‘Oh, and sorry I ranted so much.’_

_‘What else am I here for?’_

_‘Because you like me.’_

_‘Stop.’_

_‘Nope._ _’_

 

 

“Aiba?” Masaki jolted when Jun’s voice came from behind him. His attention left his phone, locking his screen as Jun came closer.

 

The expression the younger found in Aiba this time was somehow the opposite of what he witnessed inside the office. There was no longer a trace of resent in him, as if it had all been washed away.

 

“Are you okay?” Jun still asked.

 

“How did you know I was here?”

 

“Didn’t see you at the café. There aren’t many places you usually go to.” Although he was not wrong, Aiba couldn’t help but feel there was more to what he spoke. Still, he decided not to ponder on it now.

 

“You haven’t spoken much all day,” Jun shorten their distance. “You know you can tell me anything. It’s no good keeping it to yourself.”

 

“I know…” Said Aiba, becoming silent for a second. “But I can’t make them change their minds about it. No matter how wrong they are.”

 

“Aren’t you going to complain?”

 

“I wouldn’t give them the benefit. At any case, they’ll forget about it by tomorrow.” Aiba put away his phone in his pocket. “I’m getting kind of hungry.” He said as he got on his feet. Jun could see the moment Aiba’s frown eased into a smile. He wondered, still, if he could even take credit for helping his mood.

 

~

 

It was rather strange not seeing Nino in the café that afternoon. The latter hadn’t even texted Aiba of his whereabouts, although, if he was completely honest, the barista hadn’t been asking around for Aiba at all. If there was one thing for certain, his absence saved him the trouble of explaining the on-going rumors that would possibly bore him.

 

In the meantime, there was nothing wrong with sharing lunch with Jun. After lying his way out of his invitation the previous night, it was the least he could do. He needed to make things clear that he would have accepted his offer if it would have been any other day and any other time, although Jun didn’t seem particularly worried about it. He could tell by the way he appeared so calm and gentle, as if just their small chatter was enough to make up for lost time. Soon, Aiba began to feel the regret of not experiencing a night with just the two of them and was even imagining what a drunk Jun would be like.

 

Regardless of trying to convince Jun it was better if they weren’t seen together at the office to not drag himself in more unnecessary rumors, the younger had refused. Aiba resented it no matter how kind Jun made himself look, but even he had to admit that having Jun by his side was a lot more reassuring than coming into the office by himself.

 

“What’s the worst they can say? That I helped you shut down the elevator on yourself?”

 

“Probably that you forced the director to share the elevator with me.”

 

They both laughed. “As much as I would have liked to see him stuck in there and not you, I still consider disconnecting an elevator idiotic.”

 

They rode the elevator in silence until Aiba had tired himself of thinking on Jun’s words.

 

“What if that was it?” He said, giving no lead for Jun to follow on his train of thought. “What if whoever did it knows that was enough to get the director. What if they knew his weakness and tried to use that against him?”

 

“Then, you should be considered the guy who saved the director instead of the one who tried to give him a heart attack.”

 

The office was as vivid as the afternoon should be, as the morning had finally worn out. Employees resumed with their work, but not before receiving, expectantly, their director and secretary, who made an arrival after returning from their own lunch break with some members of the board as they usually did.

 

The usual bows and greetings were thrown across the room as director Sakurai headed to his office and his secretary held the door open for him, before Sakurai had decided to stop just by the door step. Most employees had not taken notice of Sakurai turning his attention over the crowd of desks to stare at the vast floor of his subordinates.

 

Slowly, as if calling them one by one, everyone’s attention was fixed on the director’s silence, as his eyes scavenged across the room.

 

“I have something to inform you of.” Sakurai said, the room falling in silence for him. “For those of you who may have thought yourself contributors to a solved cause, I have bad news. The divulgation of false information is prohibited inside of this office and can be punished if exploited. Spreading rumors is no different from this for those of you who are not aware. And don’t think that because I sit a wall away, these things don’t reach beyond that door. I’ve heard my name being mentioned more than once, and I expect it to end now. Yesterday’s happenings are nothing more than what you saw. Suggesting this incident as an attack on this office is utter insulting and further talk will not be tolerated. Is that understood?”

 

Their voices came together in response to their director, who shortly after throwing a keen glance across the room, retreated.

 

Jun and Aiba exchanged looks, their thoughts encountering half way. Someone must have really overdone it to get Sakurai to address them directly. But if he didn’t approach them sooner, who knew what other things could have spread out? It was the first time in a while that Aiba could acknowledge his leadership. Still, he wondered why Sakurai’s words made him doubt the circumstances even more.

 

~

 

“Say, Nino?” Aiba sat up on his sofa clutching a pillow.

 

“Mhm?” Nino responded from the floor, his attention drawn to his phone.

 

“Do you think he was lying?”

 

“Who was lying?”

 

“Weren’t you even listening? I was just telling you about the director.”

 

“What about him?”

 

“He called it an accident. That means there was no break-in like everyone thought. But then why did they find the system damaged?”

 

“Wasn’t this supposed to be just a dirty rumor to make you look bad?”

 

“I don’t know…” Aiba fell back on the sofa. “It doesn’t seem that easy. It sounded so filtered to me...”

 

“What, you wanted it to be a scandal?”

 

“It’s not that… but how everything happened is making me doubt more of it. It wouldn’t be odd if someone was really trying to do something. It’s not the first time someone has directed their hate towards the company.”

 

“Then? What do you think whoever did it wanted?”

 

“Probably get back on the director?”

 

“You think Jun would have done it?” asked Nino.

 

“What? No! What are you saying?” Said Masaki, indignant with Nino’s suggestion.

 

“Well he did seem pretty mad at Sakurai the other day and, correct me if I’m wrong, but we _did_ just meet him.”

 

“I am not going to assume Jun is some two-faced psychopath. Besides, if you think he would go against the director for something like that, imagine all the other employees who have been enduring him for years.”

 

“Well, it doesn’t get any easier when the guy is such an ass. Who said it had to be him anyway?”

 

“It would be obvious. He is the only one important who was there. I just happened to be caught up in the middle of it.”

 

“So, you’re just going to let everyone else decide that for you?”

 

“What?”

 

Nino rolled his eyes. “They just said those things because they wanted to victimize their precious director when, in fact, you were the one who was actually there. Now, what do _you_ really think happened?”

 

Aiba frowned as his thoughts wandered. “You mean… What if, whoever did it was aiming at someone else?”

 

“Someone who totally fell in their trap.”

 

Aiba sat back up on his sofa, his gaze fixed on Nino. “You don’t actually believe someone was going after me, do you?”

 

Nino shrugged. “I’m only trying to make sense of what happened.”

 

“Well, it’s dumb. So, stop trying to creep me out.” Aiba resumed to lay on the sofa, his body shifting to find a comfortable spot where he could rest his eyes for a second.

 

“Have you gotten involved with an unsatisfied client recently?” Nino continued.

 

“No.” Aiba brushed him off.

 

“Another employee you may have gotten in a fight with?”

 

“The office may hate my guts, but I have no reason to argue with anyone.”

 

“Hm…” The room felt silent as Nino thought, his attention fixed on his phone with great concentration. “What about Anon?”

 

Aiba’s eyes shot open gazing at Nino with a frown. “Nino…”

 

“Where was he all that time you spent closed up in that box?”

 

“Don’t.”

 

“You said it yourself, Aiba. I’m just trying to make sense out of it.”

 

“By accusing him and assuming what? That he kidnapped me?”

 

“Well someone has too, considering you see nothing wrong with befriending a stalker.”

 

“And you know him so well to say that.” Said Aiba under his breath.

 

Nino scoffed, putting away his phone and picking himself up from the floor. Aiba followed him with his gaze while the younger picked up the things he had scattered in Aiba’s apartment.

 

“You’re leaving already?” Asked Aiba.

 

“Yeah… I just remembered I have to get home. I think I can still catch the train.” Nino spoke without turning back to Aiba, making himself busy while putting on his shoes.

 

Nino uttered a small “See ya.” before closing the door behind him abruptly, leaving Aiba looking perplexedly at the door. After realizing how quiet his room had become, he regretted ever saying a word.

 

~

 

_‘I think my friend is mad at me.’_

_‘Nino?’_

_‘Why is he mad?’_

_‘It’s complicated.’_

_‘I understand his worry, but I just think he is focused on_  
 the wrong aspect of things. He probably thinks I’m weak   
and I can’t do things for myself. I just wish he could trust  
 in my conviction more.’

_‘Sounds like he cares about you.’_

_‘And I appreciate it, but….’_

_‘I want his support, but I can’t change his mind.’_

_‘Maybe he needs a little time to understand that.’_

_‘And if it is the right choice you made,  
he would see it eventually.’_

_‘I really hope it is the right choice.’_

 

~

 

 

Shortly after the day had started to roll in, the office was informed of Ohno’s absence. The director gave the statement on his arrival, ordering the tasks to be divided among all employees. After his announcement, he retreated into the solitude of his office to not be disturbed for the rest of the morning.

 

Aiba expected no less when he was handed a large number of boxes and documents that needed filing, but before he was sent out to the task, Jun had stepped in, offering his help with the promise to get the job done faster. At least now they could spend some time away from the office with each other.

 

“I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” Said Masaki to the younger. The two men dumped the boxes filled with documents on the floor of the storage room.

 

“I don’t see why they would come up with a lame excuse to make you do this by yourself.”

 

“Guess they’ll do anything at this point to get rid of me,” said Aiba jokingly, but in Jun’s mind it was nothing to laugh at.

 

Both men started scattering papers around to divide their tasks as they began to assemble the documents and file them away. Aiba was surprised at how easy it was to work alongside Jun. In no time, they had found a good pace while the other offered small chatter to get them through the work.

 

“Does the secretary tend to miss work often?” Jun Asked.

 

“I don’t remember him ever missing work. Although he has gone on several business trips over the years, but they would usually tell us beforehand.”

 

“Do you think it’s something Sakurai would fire him for?”

 

“Fire Ohno? He’d be cutting his own arm if he did. I don’t think there is anyone capable of taking his place in the office.”

 

“I guess he has his favorites then.” Jun became silent, looking through the papers with a lost gaze.

 

“I almost forgot to ask… how is your mother?” Aiba’s question brought Jun back from his thoughts.

 

“We’re still waiting for a surgery date so not much has happened.” Aiba could distinguish the forced smile in Jun’s lips while his eyes looked distracted elsewhere.

 

“I really hope she gets better soon.” Aiba tried again and after receiving no response from Jun he understood it wasn’t the right moment to ask after all. “I think I didn’t say this before,” Aiba spoke to get rid of the silence between them. “But I wanted to apologize. That other day you invited me for a drink. I wasn’t feeling like myself and I didn’t want you to misunderstand me.”

 

“You shouldn’t worry about that. It was bad timing. I should have been more considerate.”

 

“B-But I’ll make it up to you, I promise,” said Aiba.

 

“You don’t have to-”

 

“I mean it, Jun. It’s the least I can do.”

 

The younger stared at him with wide eyes before he turned away, a small chuckle escaping his lips. Although Aiba was confused as to why he smiled, he was glad the worry in his eyes was gone.

 

“What’s so funny?” Aiba asked while the younger hid his laugh with the back of his hand.

 

“Nothing it’s just… It’s the first time I hear you using my name.”

 

Aiba stared unblinking at Jun before the realization hit him and his hand fell over his mouth in a gasp. “I-I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to sound rude.”

 

“It’s fine. I really don’t mind.” Aiba tried to hide his embarrassment from Jun’s gaze, but by just the sight of his lips curling, Aiba’s cheeks heated violently.

 

Jun returned to filing as he let the other regain himself. After a moment of silence, a thought made him smile to himself again. “I really admire you.” Jun said out of the sudden. If he was trying to make Aiba feel flushed, he was doing a good job at it. “I don’t think anyone in the office works as hard as you, and yet they underappreciate you, talking about you when you can hear them, taking advantage of you. But you don’t say a thing and you come the next day, put on your best face and deal with it all over again. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone as strong as you.”

 

It was Aiba’s turn to let escape a chuckle. “It’s not as easy as you make it sound. As you said, I do hear them, and it bothers me just like it would bother anyone. I just try to not let it get to me.”

 

“That alone makes you stronger than me. I can’t get mad without opening my mouth.”

 

“Maybe… Speaking your mind doesn’t make you a bad person. I think it shows you’re passionate for your work and you shouldn’t be afraid of that. Of course, it brings consequences, but letting others know how you feel is better than never speaking your mind at all. I’m always thinking of what would happen and I think it has made me cowardly… I don’t know if that’s something worth admiring.”

 

“It must be your commitment,” said Jun gaining a frown from Aiba. “Even when you don’t speak your mind, you commit to what you know and that is what helps you get through it.”

 

“My commitment, huh?” Aiba repeated, reminiscing about the times he may have thought he understood that word. Yet, if it meant something to Jun, maybe it wasn’t such a bad word after all.

 

“I just meant to say that… Regardless of the things that’ve been going around, you don’t get discouraged easily and that makes you far better than anyone. Somehow… that has made me feel very lucky, and… I’m glad it’s you… who I met.” This time, when Jun’s gaze fixed on Aiba, the storage room had become a lot smaller, or was it Jun who had managed to shorten the distance between them? He couldn’t tell. Only when the other was able to resume with his work was when Aiba was able to pounder on his words and make his own come through.

 

“Speaking of meeting… can I make a weird question?” Aiba asked. Jun agreed, inviting him to go on. “What if… hypothetically speaking, you like someone, but you’re afraid to approach them for whatever reason, will it make it any easier for you to hide yourself from them, but still let them know you like them?”

 

After giving him a strange look, Jun thought to himself for a long second. “Any specific circumstance?”

 

“For instance, you write a note saying you like them, but you don’t sign it.”

 

Jun thought quietly while he placed another group of files into their shelves. “I think it makes sense, but wouldn’t it feel lonely?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, if I confessed to someone, it will at least make me feel good once I’ve said it. But on the other hand, the person receiving the note wouldn’t feel the same way. Maybe they’ll feel confused because they don’t know who it is from and they can’t really answer the note since they don’t even know who they’re addressing.”

 

“Exactly…” Aiba said more to himself than to Jun.

 

“But at the same time…. I kind of understand whoever wrote the letter. Maybe they just wanted things to be said rather than having them acted on. Maybe they’re trying to avoid facing something they don’t want to see. If you know you’re going to be rejected, then it’s better to stay with the satisfaction of just confessing your feelings.”

 

“But if you don’t face that rejection, you’ll never know the possibility of it being an approval. It’ll be the same as running away. That will make you a coward.”

 

Jun didn’t reply. His attention kept fixed on the documents he put away, making his expression unreadable to Masaki, before he realized what he’d said.

 

“This is… hypothetical, of course.” Aiba repeated while Jun simply nodded. Suddenly, he felt the urge to bang his head against the wall. One day without speaking to Nino and he still couldn’t control how casually the words came out of him. If only he was there to break the tension that had built in the room.

 

“Ouch!” Aiba's hand shook when he felt a stinging pain. A too thin piece of paper having scraped his palm, tracing a reddish mark that soon began to palpitate. Before a complaint of his clumsiness would even escape Aiba, Jun had grabbed his hand. Searching in his pocket, he took out a neatly folded handkerchief which he wrapped around Aiba’s hand. “Ah, you don’t have to… You’ll stain it-”

 

“You can return it later.” His hands pressed on Masaki’s palm, securing his wound under the fabric. Aiba could feel the warmth of Jun’s hand pressing against his when their fingers found each other in a delicate brush. Although his hand didn’t sting as badly anymore, Jun didn’t seem willing to let go.

 

~

 

Their task was a little more than half way done by the time noon approached. Aiba had gone to wash his bleeding hand and find some bandages before returning to help Jun finish the job. Other than the documents he still had to take care of, they both had to manage their own work waiting for them back at their desks. It was going to be a long day for sure.

 

When Aiba returned to the storage room, Jun was gone. There was no sign of him by the hall nor had he seen him on his way out of the bathroom. Masaki headed down the corridor, back into the office right before his feet stopped. A collision of voices echoed down the hall. Aiba wished his ears were failing him, but a bad feeling in his gut wouldn’t let him think otherwise. Cursing under his breath, his feet hurried towards the office.

 

“Please, Sir! They just called me from the hospital, if I go now, I could get there in time-”

 

“I am not responsible for your loss of hours. If you don’t finish your schedule-”

 

“I’ll work for the rest of the week, as many hours as you ask just… please. I have to-”

 

“You know they will be no excuse if you can’t pass our evaluation.” Sakurai’s words sounded more of a threat than a warning. But the anger pooling in Jun’s eyes was vivid, staring back at Sakurai as if it were about to burst.

 

“Sir!” A third voice manifested between the two office men when Aiba pushed himself through the crowd of on-looking employees, their eyes falling on him. “Please, let him go. I’ve been working all day with him and watching over his performance. He’ll be loyal to his promise. I understand it is indeed of bad timing, but this is important to him and I believe he won’t be able to keep performing throughout the day if you forbid him to go. If it’s of any consolation, I will take responsibility for the work left.” Aiba’s head bowed low to Sakurai, regardless of how many gestures Matsumoto had made to try to prevent it. But Aiba was not going to back away after seeing the fear in Jun’s eyes and how anxiously his trembling hand held on to his phone. No matter what, he was going to make sure Sakurai would understand the degree of his worry.

 

Eventually, Matsumoto’s head had also bowed to their director as they begged for his response. The number of his subordinates watching on had increased dramatically, bringing unwanted attention and a bad taste in Sakurai’s mouth. Sakurai sighed profoundly, looking away from the two of them.

 

“Go.” The director’s voice finally came through, making both coworkers raise their heads to confirm it. This time, he didn’t bother to repeat himself, his head gesturing towards the elevators to Matsumoto.

 

The relieve in Jun’s face was unmeasurable. He bowed once again gratefully before heading towards the elevator.

 

The rest of the employees returned to their desk once Sakurai gave the order, all except for Aiba who had stopped to observe the director walking back into his office. For a short moment, Aiba thought he had seen something wavering in his eyes that he somehow couldn’t trace. But just the idea of seeing the understanding that was always missing in him had shaken his thoughts. Whatever it may have been, he couldn’t be more grateful than what he was at that moment. Masaki bowed his head once again while the door to his office closed behind Sakurai.

 

~

 

 _‘I’m sorry I couldn’t go to lunch today. I’m really busy._  
I’ll have to explain later. Let’s just hope  
 I’m still employed by then.’

_‘Did the café stop doing the delivery service? I would kill for  
some coffee right about now.’_

_‘Don’t wait for me today. I don’t know when I’ll be done.’_

_‘Nino? You alive?’_

_‘I left early.’_

_‘Oh… alright.’_

 

~

 

_‘The way you stood up for that guy was very  
admirable.’_

_‘You mean Jun?’_

_‘I’m sure he feels very lucky to have you as a friend.’_

_‘It’s the least I could do. He is a good person,_  
and I couldn’t sit back and watch. I let it happen  
 once before and I didn’t want to make the same  
 mistake again. I just hope everything is okay.’

_‘What do you mean by “make the same mistake”?’_

_‘The last person who got in an argument with_  
the director was my friend. We’d been close for years   
until he got fired and I lost contact with him suddenly.   
I still don’t know what he is up to.’

 _‘Somehow, I felt guilty for not stepping up for him._  
I was so afraid that it would cause trouble for the both of us.  
 It was selfish of me. I still wonder if he’s mad about it.’

_‘If he’s truly your friend, he wouldn’t blame you  
 for something like that.’_

_‘I guess not.’_

_‘Speaking of being mad, is everything okay with Nino?’_

_‘No… I’ve been texting him all day but he’s  
not really answering.’_

_‘And I know he’s been reading my messages,  
so I don’t get it.’_

_‘I’m sorry to hear that.’_

_‘At least we’re finished for the day. Are you going  
out for dinner or a drink?’_

_‘Speak for yourself. I still have work to do.’_

_‘Damn… I didn’t see the time. It’s getting late.’_

_‘What do you mean? You’re not home?’_

_‘Remember when I told the director I would take responsibility?_  
 Big mistake. I have a deadline coming up and I still need to  
 prepare some things before meeting a client.’

_‘You’re still at the office?’_

_‘It’s nothing I haven’t done before.’_

_‘Is there anyone else there?’_

_‘Miss Mitsushima left probably half an hour ago.  
 But since then, it’s just me.’_

_‘You shouldn’t stay there so late.’_

_‘I know, but I had to do this. I promised Jun I would take care of it.  
 I don’t want him to get fired.’_

_‘That doesn’t depend on you.’_

_‘I know, but what else could I have told the director?_  
 I was afraid he would say something harsh. If this is the price  
 I must pay for everything to work out for him, I’ll take it.’

_‘You would do that for him?’_

_‘I would do it for anyone that proves themselves  
worth helping.’_

_‘Like Matsumoto.’_

_‘He’s been through so much lately,  
 it hurts me to see him so hurt.’_

_‘Do you pity him?’_

_‘No! It’s nothing like that.’_

_‘He seems to trust in me so much, like he has no one_  
else to lean on, but I’m more than glad to help him.   
He is an amazing person, so easy to open up to.  
 He deserves better, I only hope I can do enough for him.’

_‘Aiba?’_

_‘Do you like him?’_

_‘Do I… like Jun?’_

_‘Why would you think that?’_

_‘It seems likely.’_

_‘I guess… it does seem like I think about him often.’_

_‘Then, do you?’_

_‘If I’m completely honest with you… I can’t deny  
 he is very attractive.’_

_‘Is that all?’_

_‘Well, maybe in a certain scenario where there is a  
possibility that he likes me, it wouldn’t be so bad.’_

_‘Would you go out with him if he asked you?’_

_‘You’re asking a lot about Jun, why is that?’_

_‘You’re right. I’m sorry. I’ll stop.’_

_‘Is there something you want to tell me, Anon?’_

_‘It’s fine.’_

_‘I never really took you as a jealous person.’_

_‘It isn’t… Forget it.’_

_‘Will it bother you?’_

_‘If I went out with Jun?’_

_‘…’_

_‘You really are acting weird tonight.’_

_‘Or am I just really high on caffeine right now?’_

_‘Probably the latter.’_

_‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to corner you.’_

_‘It’s fine. I made a bunch of stupid questions too.’_

_‘We’ll call it truce.’_

_‘Agreed.’_

_‘I really wish I could go home.’_

_‘I don’t think anyone would notice if you go.  
Can’t you just do it in the morning?’_

_‘At this rate, I don’t think I’ll be able to feel  
my hands tomorrow.’_

_‘Wait. A light’s still on.’_

_‘I think the director is here.’_

_‘That’s weird. I thought he should have  
 left by now.’_

_‘Maybe it’s just his office light that’s on.  
 I haven’t see him come out.’_

_‘Just leave it alone. Someone from maintenance  
will probably turn it off.’_

_‘I think I saw him. He is definitely in there.’_

_‘I wonder what he is up to.’_

_‘Probably busy as you are, heading home.’_

_‘Anon, give me a second. I’ll be right back.’_

_‘Go home, Aiba.’_

_‘I’ll text you when I’m out.’_

~

 

Masaki moved across the dim lit office towards the end, where a door emitted light from the gaps of its frame. _You don’t even know what to say_ , he told himself, his hands grasping the cold door knob, making excuses in his head to not go in.

 

Soon enough, he stepped back from the door. Yet, no matter what may have crossed his mind, there was something that wouldn’t permit him to go, and the impulse became greater when Jun’s empty desk stared back at him.

 

When he finally knocked on the director’s door, there was no response from the other side. The door was unlocked, and he proceeded to open it slowly, in case his knock had not been enough. The lights from inside were blinding compared to the rest of the office at that time of the night, but they didn’t seem to disturb the director. It was not until the door creaked that his sight rose from the papers on his desk to Aiba by the door.

 

“Excuse me, sir? I hope I’m not bothering you.” Aiba said timidly at first, holding a small tray in his hands carrying a soothing and warm aroma that now traveled inside the private office. “I noticed you were here and… I made some tea. I was wondering if you would like… some?”

 

Aiba wasn’t sure if it was the effects of the late night, but Sakurai looked lost, almost disturbed. His features questioning Aiba’s presence from across the room. Masaki concluded it was probably a bad idea to have come so suddenly after all, but before he was ready to apologize, Sakurai finally spoke.

 

“Come in.” he said without another choice.

 

Given his permission, Aiba moved deeper into the room, hoping the rattling of the cups wouldn’t give away his nerves. He settled down the tray on a coffee table across his desk, making sure he was still in a secure distance from the director’s threatening presence, which seemed ironically toned down at that time of the night.

 

“Thank you,” said Sakurai, his attention turning to his laptop screen, as if refusing to address Masaki directly, leaving the latter evidently unsatisfied.

 

His silence and the lonely clatter of his keyboard was not enough to turn Masaki around. He remained vigilant in the middle of the room, waiting until the uncomfortable silence forced Sakurai to fix on him.

 

“Can I help you with anything?”

 

Masaki’s hands tightened their grip as he gained air to speak. “Actually, sir… I think I own you an apology.” Masaki stared straight at him, his throat becoming dry, but he couldn’t afford to lose Sakurai’s attention.

 

“I have great respect for you, sir, and I hope you don’t misunderstand my actions. I was, in no way, intending to go against you and I perfectly understand your reasons to keep the office meeting with the company’s demand, and, for that same reason, I asked for you to spare Matsumoto. I’ve been worried of his well-being and I believed he wouldn’t have met with your expectations if you forbade him to go. I recognize I stepped in as a friend, rather than an employee and for my poor judgement, I apologize. But, at the same time… I don’t seem to regret doing it. As unprofessional as I may have been, I wanted to say that… you made the right thing, sir, and I thank you for that. Not just for Matsumoto, but for myself as well.”

 “That day, when you addressed the rumors about the accident, I felt relief. Since then, I haven’t been feeling the most welcomed in the office. I’ve been called a liar, a schemer, two-faced, all sorts of things that I’m obviously not. Matsumoto says I’m strong for not letting them manipulate me, but I don’t think that’s the right word to describe it when I can’t do anything about it. And I don’t know if you did this consciously, but I am very thankful. When you displayed your authority in such circumstances, your words… saved me, and I couldn’t be more grateful for that.”

 

Sakurai’s arms were crossed over his chest once Masaki was finished. The younger took a deep breath to compose himself while he waited for the most minimal reaction from Sakurai when the latter sighed.

 

“Are you finished?” Sakurai asked, his words pressuring Aiba. “… With your work, I mean?” he clarified.

 

“Y-Yes, sir.” Aiba responded weakly. 

 

Sakurai began looking through his desk, moving the piles of papers and documents from one side to another in an effort to arrange his mess with little success. There were papers without labeling scattered everywhere, and it was almost impossible to tell there was a table underneath. Masaki began to suspect it could have been of Ohno’s doing that his desk was so well arranged most of the time.

 

Sakurai placed a pile of papers and folders by the edge of his desk. “Would you arrange those?” he said to Aiba, but what came out as a request seemed more like a command.

 

Aiba paused hesitantly, waiting to confirm Sakurai’s order, but with just a look from the other, Aiba complied, pulling a chair closer to Sakurai’s desk where he had made space for him.

 

Sakurai was still shuffling papers around when Aiba’s curiosity laid on a small bottle toppled over his desk. He barely even noticed the label before Sakurai reached towards what he observed. The pill bottle rattled as Sakurai tossed it into the back of his desk drawer and out of sight. Noticing his actions alluded to seeing something he shouldn’t have, Aiba decided not to question it and proceeded with his assignment.

 

Just like that time at the elevator, the two of them shared a profound silence. Aiba had to make an effort to respect the stillness surrounding them, afraid the most minimal sound would trigger the director’s impatience, but it wasn’t enough to make Aiba particularly uncomfortable. On the contrary, it gave him the space to work carefully on his task. Although an eventual distraction would always come to bother him watching how the director worked across from him with great diligence.

 

He would peek up from his papers to notice the way he had pulled up the sleeves of his shirt, or how he bit on his lower lip in concentration. Yet the moment Sakurai discovered his staring, he would jolt back into his own work, cursing at himself for getting too carried away.

 

“You said you brought tea?” Sakurai was the first to speak to Aiba’s surprise. The younger nodded, and following his leads, he brought the tray with the single cup of tea, closer to his desk.

 

Sakurai thanked him silently before bringing the drink to his lips, but just a taste of the strong tea made it hard for Sakurai to swallow. Aiba was quick to notice the slight disgust in his expression.

 

“Is it cold already? I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t even notice. I must have rambled for too long. I’ll heat it up right away-” Sakurai raised a hand to Aiba before he continued.

 

“It’s fine.” Sakurai said.

 

“Are you sure, sir?”

 

“It’s good.” Sakurai added, as if trying to ease Aiba, but the latter could barely take in his compliment. Aiba shrunk in his chair, Sakurai’s hard expression feeding on his insecurity.

 

“What are you doing here so late?” Sakurai asked not looking up from his computer. If Masaki didn’t know better, he would have thought the director was trying to converse with him.

 

“I said I would be responsible for today’s pending work.”

 

“I see…” A vast silence spread between them. After all, he wasn’t very good at small talk. “You seem close with our new employee.”

 

“Yeah…” Said Masaki, before realizing what he’d suggested. “I mean… we work well together.” Aiba added gaining a look from Sakurai. “He has adapted quite quickly, and he is of much help. It’ll take him some time to loosen up around the office, in that sense he usually leans towards me for advice, but I’m sure you’ll find potential in him when you judge his performance.”

 

“In the least, he is not lacking,” Sakurai’s attention was drawn away. “That much I’ve heard.”

 

“So far the way we work together is complementing. Much like you and the secretary. Except, of course, he doesn’t respond to me and… you’ve been working together for longer…” Masaki paused getting the feeling he was not being listened to any more from the lack of response from the director. “Is… the secretary okay?” he tried again, changing the subject.

 

“Yes.” Sakurai responded almost brushing off his question.

 

“Will he be returning tomorrow?”

 

“Yes.” He said again, with the same abrupt tone. Perhaps he was tired of the small talk. It was impossible to read him when he didn’t even meet eyes with him. “It was a minor cold.” Sakurai finally spoke words of his own. “I told him not to come in.”

 

“That’s good to know.”

 

“Did you have some business with him?” asked Sakurai.

 

“What?”

 

“Did you needed to see Ohno?”

 

“N-No, I was worried it was something serious, but I’m relieved.” Sakurai’s fingers stopped over his keyboard to look questioningly at Aiba. “He works around here so much, I didn’t realize how much we depend on him until today. And, if I’m honest, people seemed quite stressed without him, including you, sir. I was afraid, if he didn’t come soon, you wouldn’t be able to take a break.”

 

“You’re right, you know,” said Sakurai. “He’s usually the one who tells me to stop.”

 

“Is that why you’re here so late too?”

 

“Maybe.” The cup rested on his lips before taking another swig of tea.

 

“Have you been working together for long?”

 

Sakurai took his time to answer, questioning the origin of his curiosity. “You could say we have. Since we studied together.”

 

“Really? You were partners since back then?”

 

Sakurai nodded. “Until I came to the company and I appointed him for the post. I’ve never met anyone more qualified.”

 

“In that case, it’s no wonder you work well together. It’s not something many acknowledge but, the management you've carried throughout the office is notably respectable.”

 

“Are you patronizing me?”

 

“N-No! That’s not what I meant… I didn’t mean to sound rude, I …” Masaki he bowed his head bashfully after he couldn’t find the right words. His apologies died down with the singular sound of Sakurai’s chuckle. His eyes looked on to the man across from him, whom he’d never met eyes with, before he’d felt a subtle rush of color on his cheeks. Masaki quickly looked away trying not to be unrespectable.

 

“It’s not something I’m told very often, but…. I’m flattered,” said Sakurai. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s no news I’m not the most admired around here, but it’s a change of pace to hear there are exceptions. That is… if you truly mean it.”

 

“I do, sir. I’ve always considered myself very lucky to be working here,” said Masaki genuinely.

 

“At least I’m doing something right.”

 

By the way the other had become silent again, Masaki felt he must have said something out of place, but he didn’t regret anything he spoke. Masaki’s words were anything but dishonest.

 

They each proceeded with their work, the occasional chatter making time much worthwhile, letting the serene night settle. Other than the occasional question from Aiba regarding the documents he assembled, the rest of the evening seemed to roll away with time.

 

“I don’t have a particular preference. The tea was fine.”

 

“Fine doesn’t mean good, does it?”

 

“I’m more use to the coffee here rather than the tea.” Sakurai admitted.

 

“Should I have made coffee instead?”

 

“No. The thought was enough.”

 

“I didn’t know how you would prefer it, since it’s always the secretary who makes it.”

 

“His way of making it is nothing special.”

 

“Then… have you tried the café here at the company?” Sakurai rose a brow at Masaki. “My friend works there, he makes great coffee. I’m sure he’ll deliver it here if you asked. They even have a special with his name on it. He still says my coffee taste better than his though. Says it’s not fair because I lived in a restaurant.”

 

“Restaurant?” Sakurai asked.

 

Aiba flushed dimly, realizing he’d gotten carried away, almost forgetting who was sitting across from him. “Y-Yeah… both my parents are cooks.”

 

“I would have never known.”

 

Masaki covered his mouth to drive away a yawn, trying not to seem rude in front of Sakurai. He glanced at his wrist watch momentarily having noticed for several minutes how late it had become, yet the director made no effort to be finishing any sooner. “It’s getting really late,” Masaki hinted. “We should be finishing.”

 

“You’re right.” Sakurai glazed at his wall clock. “I shouldn’t be keeping you, either.”

 

“It is no bother. This is usually the time I get home.” Masaki tapped his papers straight over the table and put them away before he caught Sakurai’s pensive look.

 

He was distracted, bothered by a thought. “I only said the truth.” His words came slowly, feeding on Aiba’s confusion. “About the accident, I said what was necessary.”

 

“You did, sir,” Aiba assured him.

 

“Everything that is said and done is solely for the good of this office. I would never compromise the safety of my employment.”

 

Aiba nodded in understanding. “I agree things got out of control, to a point… even I was doubting it myself.”

 

Sakurai was about to say something before he decided to think of his words more carefully. “If there’s anything you want to say,” his voice lowered. “Anything you may have seen…”

 

Aiba eyes widened before he shook his head. Sakurai lay back on his chair, his gaze turning away. Perhaps he had said too much after all. For a long moment, Aiba didn’t know where to rest his eyes, having no words to hearten Sakurai.

 

“I’m sorry.” The words came from the director instead, unsettling at first. Aiba thought he would be the last person he needed to hear an apology from, almost wishing he would take it back. “You may go.”

 

Aiba regretted having nothing to say, but he didn’t fight his order. He got on his feet and bowed before he walked towards the door. Aiba stopped shortly to direct himself towards him a last time. “I hope you return safely, sir.” Aiba walked out the office, hoping his words didn’t just last for that one night.

 

~

 

_‘Anon, I’m back. On my way home.’_

_‘It’s really late.’_

_‘I know. I’m not far, I promise.’_

_‘Everything okay?’_

_‘I’m not sure, but…’_

_‘I think someone is attacking the director.’_

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 6. We finally got to see some of Sakurai, but what will be his role to play in the conflicts arising? As Aiba and Anon grow closer, Nino seems to be growing further apart, but why? We begin to see a strengthening connection between Jun and Aiba. What will this bring for them? Is Anon ready to take a next step in his and Aiba's acquaintanceship? We'll see on the next chapter. Thanks for reading~!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 7 is here! I have a feeling you'll like this one. It's my personal favorite ^^ ~ Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 7

 

 

_“How’s the office?”_

“It’s been rather empty today. Every other employee is running errands, not in their desk, talking, making coffee,” Masaki described, maneuvering his phone on his shoulder as he served himself a cup of the hot beverage. “The usual.”

 

 _“What about you?”_ Aiba could hear Matsumoto’s smirk through the line.

“Guess I’m not up to much, but…. I think I may have a shot with that client I told you about earlier.”

 

_“You really think so?”_

 

“I just might. It’ll be perfect if I could have this one thing, but I shouldn’t get my hopes up.”

 

_“What do you mean? You totally deserve this.”_

Aiba drank a sip of his coffee. “Things don’t usually work out that easily for me.” There was a brief pause before either of them spoke. “Why are we talking about me again? I called to ask about you! How is everything? Is your mother any better?”

 

_“She is! Thankfully, the surgery went smoothly, and she’s been recovering quickly. The doctor’s been praising her all morning for getting through with it. She gave us quite a scare but… everything worked out for the best.”_

The relief in Jun’s voice was more than evident and it brought a smile to Masaki’s lips. “I’m glad, honestly. And… I’m sorry I didn’t contact you sooner. I didn’t want to interfere,”

 

_“You don’t even have to mention it. What you did back in the office… Where do I even start to thank you?”_

“Ah, that was nothing.”

 

 _“Are you kidding? You saved my job! Seriously, I don’t know where I’d be without your help.”_ Aiba was thankful Jun couldn’t hear the blush the latter’s words provoked. _“I wish I could thank you properly, but it’ll take me some days to catch up with work and Sakurai won’t forgive me for it.”_

“I understand. You should take it easy for now. There’s no need to rush it.”

 

 _“Guess we’ll have to post-pone those drinks again.”_ Jun sighed into the phone, the exhaustion clear in his voice. After a possibly sleepless night still he had the energy to dwell on something so trivial, yet Aiba found his reminder rather cute.

 

“Yeah…”

 

_“How’s your schedule looking for now? I don’t suppose… I got you into any trouble with the director or… am I wrong?”_

“Oh, no, it’s fine. You could say… I sort of talked it out with him.”

 

 _“Really?”_ Jun seemed genuinely surprised. _“Was he mad?”_

“I’m… not really sure. We didn’t talk much about it after I explained,”

 

_“Then… what did you talk about?”_

Aiba realize it was not the time to get into details and decided to look over Jun’s curiosity. “I explained myself the best I could, and he seemed to accept it, eventually.”

 

_“And… how is he looking today?”_

Aiba had to peek outside the break room and briefly glance at the director’s office. “Definitely not in a good mood after this morning’s news. They’re saying the Murakami Corporation went bankrupt.” Aiba whispered into his phone.

 

_“The law-firm?”_

 

“There’ve been talks all day about cutting ties with us. The director’s been stuck in meetings all morning and management is probably a war zone. It’s one of our most loyal clients! I can’t think of the measures they must be planning to make up for this. It’s going to leave a mark on us, for sure.”

 

_“Damn it, I wish I was there. This is the worst timing!”_

“On the bright side, since Sakurai’s been on his toes, he doesn’t have time to ask if you’ve showed up already or not. If anything, it’s the right timing.”

 

_“But I want to be of some help! Be there when they make rounds and pass out the work. Help you when they decide to dump everything on you,”_

Aiba laughed, flattered by his thoughtfulness and humor regardless of all they’ve been through in recent days. And Aiba was more than thankful that he’d always made the unconscious attempt to make him smile every time. 

 

A pair of footsteps entered the room just then, catching Aiba’s glance, who instantly hid his phone from the secretary’s prowling eyes. “Jun, I got to go now. Sorry!” Aiba whispered his last words with little success to fool the other who started working on the coffee machine.

 

With much regret, Aiba had hung up mid-sentence and put down his phone, trying to put his outmost attention and energy into drinking his last sips of coffee.

 

Much like the director and the rest of the employees, Ohno didn’t look his best. Aiba could tell by the degree Ohno’s shoulders slumped that it was his third run of Sakurai’s not-so-special coffee. As he prepared it almost by instinct, Ohno made no attempt to provide any of his attention to Aiba, probably distracted by the last complaint he had to hear from Sakurai, judging by the heaviness of his eyebags and a prominent pout on his lips. Meanwhile Aiba drank his coffee quietly, determined to return to his desk as soon as possible.

 

Ohno sighed heavily, bringing attention upon himself. “You’re not supposed to be making personal calls during office hours.” He suddenly said, taking Aiba by surprise.

 

The latter set down his cup before he addressed Ohno. “I-I’m very sorry, sir. It won’t happen again.”

 

“Isn’t that what you told the director last time?” Ohno asked, his gaze set on the pouring coffee while his mind wandered elsewhere.

 

It took Aiba a little over a moment to realize what Ohno suggested and even more to catch the tone in which Ohno spoke to him as he stood there, silently, and completely unarmed.

 

“It may be none of my business but standing in for a new employee and making promises you barely even follow is rather irresponsible,” said Ohno. Masaki gulped harshly, his response, nothing but silence. “Whose fault would it be if things pile up?” Masaki tried uttering words, but his thoughts came all at once. “And I suppose this familiarity between you two is only professional?”

 

“Of course, sir! I-I don’t have any intention to deceive you or the director. Believe me, it’s the last thing I would do.”

 

Ohno eyed him momentarily with a hard look weighing on his features before he turned back to finish the director’s coffee. After he brusquely poured milk into the cup and an unmeasured, yet concerning, amount of sugar, he was ready to leave, but not before giving Aiba a last look. A distrustful air made Ohno sigh at Aiba, inspecting him from head to toe.

 

“Get back to work.” Ohno commanded, and after Aiba assured him he would, Ohno parted to the director’s office.

 

It had been quite a while since he had seen this side of Ohno. The more stress drove him, the more he appeared to reflect the director himself. But the last thing any of the employees at the office needed was a second director to be looking at their flaws and reporting on them every so often. Yet unlike Sakurai, Ohno had the capacity to seem normal much frequently.

 

 

~

 

_‘Secretary’s in a bad mood again.  
Things must be tough in there.’_

_‘…’_

 

 

~

 

_‘It’s been long since we last spoke,  
I’m starting to get worried. Is everything okay?_

_‘You know you can tell me anything, Nino.’_

_‘I feel like going for ramen but it’s not as delicious  
 without a friend.’_

_‘Anything I can do?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Just text me if you change your mind.’_

 

~

 

 

_‘Sorry I saw your message so late.  
Had to turn off my phone.’_

_‘Don’t worry about it. It wasn’t the  
 right time anyway.’_

_‘Was your day any better than mine?’_

_‘You mean tiring, stressful and endless?’_

_‘Yes, but you forgot unbearable.’_

_‘I suppose you’ve already heard of the  
 Murakami Corp. scandal.’_

_‘Sadly, it’s all I’ve been hearing about today.’_

_‘This is a mess. What are we going to do?’_

_‘Bear with it. They weren’t our only clients so  
I’m sure they’ll think of alternatives to get through it.’_

_‘I’m only thinking of the worst. I can’t possibly  
imagine what administration is like right now.’_

_‘They shouldn’t be taking it lightly, but they  
 can’t despair either.’_

_‘What are your predictions on this?’_

_‘I don’t know…’_

_‘I’m not in the right position  
to infer about it.’_

_‘Maybe not as an employee, but what would  
 you say as my friend?’_

_‘Don’t think about it too much.’_

_‘I’m sure they’re being as cautious as they can.’_

_‘And if it comes down to lay-offs?’_

_‘It’s still very uncertain. It doesn’t necessarily  
have to come to that.’_

_‘I hope so, or we would be in trouble.’_

_‘I wouldn’t be surprised, though,  
 if they were drawing names already.’_

_‘The director should have a few as well._  
 Even though it would be a big hit on the company,   
It’s the easiest alternative. Anything else would  
 make them waste resources.’

_‘Right now, new contracts would mean gold.’_

_‘Now that you mention it…’_

_‘?’_

_‘I’m meeting with a client tomorrow.’_

_‘For?’_

_‘It’s a new client. They seem very interested_  
to open an offer with us. So far, they were pleased   
with the preliminary pitch and they asked  
 me to assess the project. They might be signing a  
 contract very soon, but nothing is for certain.’

_‘Aiba, that’s really great news.’_

_‘I know. I really hope I don’t blow it this once.’_

_‘What are you saying? You’ll do great.’_

_‘At least, it’ll be some good news to report back at the office.’_

_‘It certainly will.’_

_‘Don’t mention the contract unless they do so first._  
 At any case, lean into it as subtly as possible, and  
 only if they seem approving.’

_‘Right.’_

_‘It’s good to show them you’re prepared,_  
but any miscalculation will seem like you’re   
forcing it and that’s clearly not what you want.’

_‘I haven’t thought about this enough._  
This could go wrong in some many ways.   
I may get called out for not advancing on them before.’

_‘The last thing I want is to end on bad terms  
with the director.’_

_‘Relax. You’ve done it before.’_

_‘The company really needs this. I don’t want to  
 disappoint him now.’_

_‘Why would you?’_

_‘Well… I’ve already got my strikes and you know_  
he’s very delicate with these things. Messing up now  
 would put me in a bad position.’

_‘Are you afraid of him?’_

_‘To a certain extent… I guess I was.’_

_‘But, I don’t know... It’s been different lately.’_

_‘What is?’_

_‘He’s different… somehow.’_

_‘?’_

_‘It’s complicated to say anything in specific._  
It’s not like he’s changed, but I think I realized he is   
more conscious of himself than what I thought.   
He’s hard to read, regardless, but maybe   
he is trying to understand himself as well.’

_‘You think there’s another side to him?’_

_‘There has to be.’_

_‘He is not very sincere with himself.’_

_‘If he were, he’d be a totally different person.’_

_‘He’s more of a coward to me.’_

_‘Someone who is just trying to hide himself  
with authority.’_

_‘Maybe that same privilege is what’s stopping him  
from being anything else?’_

_‘I don’t know if I would blame him for that.’_

_‘Sounds like you know him.’_

_‘I don’t really.’_

_‘Nino and I use to think of ways to justify his behavior._  
 It was our way of helping me get over my stress   
whenever I received a complaint from the director.   
It would give me reasons not to hate my job.’

_‘That… sounds quite inventive.’_

_‘Because of it, I started to think of the  
director differently.’_

_‘I still get nervous around him though.  
 I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.’_

_‘How would you say he feels around his employees?’_

_‘Perhaps, judged. I’m starting to get a feeling  
he’s misunderstood as well.’_

_‘Because of what you mentioned earlier?’_

_‘Exactly.’_

_‘Do you think he wants to be understood?’_

_‘I’m not sure. He could be scared. In that case,  
you would be right. He might be a coward.’_

_‘Do you hate him?’_

_‘It’s hard to like someone like that,_  
 but I wouldn’t call it hate. Before all,   
being understanding is more important.’

_‘That sounds deep.’_

_‘Yeah. I must be getting sleepy.’_

_‘You’re the type who gets lost in thought the later it gets?’_

_‘And I begin to bore myself as well, yeah.’_

_‘But it’s interesting, what you said. You seem to have a talent for reading people.’_

_‘You think so? There are still people I can’t quite grasp yet,  
 though I really wish I could.’_

_‘Maybe with time, they’ll come around.’_

_‘With time.’_

_‘I’ll let you rest.’_

_‘Alright. You should rest too, Anon.’_

_‘I will. Good night.’_

_‘Night.’_

~

 

Aiba expected no less from Nino when the latter never returned his messages. After all, Aiba agreed it was better to do things personally than through text, but the younger didn’t know the amount of work that was pilling on that prevented Aiba from visiting the café. This day was no different from the last.

 

Since he boarded the train to work that morning, Aiba had been going back and forth through the papers he would be handing to his client that same afternoon, making revisions and ensuring that everything was in order. He was so concerned it’d only made it harder for him to fall asleep that previous night after his talk with Anon. It was nothing a cup of coffee couldn’t fix, thought Aiba, thinking that if he made it on time to the office today, he might be visiting Nino after all. It was not in his calculations though, that he would be arriving at the same time as the director and just a second too late to take the elevator before him.

 

Aiba resented to walk any further, even when the elevator remained empty behind Sakurai. A whole day stuck in those same four walls was enough for him to learn that lesson. In fact, Aiba was happy to wait for the next elevator, yet it didn’t seem to be the case for Sakurai, when the latter’s hand had stopped the elevator before it closed on Aiba.

 

“You don’t expect me to make you late on purpose, do you?”

 

Aiba paused, confused by Sakurai’s sudden gesture. He was ready to refuse if it wasn’t for the same person who held the door for him. He found it surprising that Sakurai would be by himself once again, especially now that he knew of the suspicions that arose each passing day. Still, he didn’t appear concerned to be seen alone that morning. On the contrary, Aiba would say he appeared rather willing to risk any odds if it only meant he could prove something.

 

The longer Aiba hesitated, the more it seemed for Sakurai’s words to become an order, rather than a courtesy. Eventually, Aiba obliged, stepping in and standing by the end of the compartment, making his presence less noticeable.

 

“I thought it was required that you used your own elevator, sir.” Aiba inferred in a low voice, afraid his comment would not be welcomed by the other’s customary silence. He gained a brief look from the other, nonetheless.

 

“Have I ever said that?” Sakurai asked doubtfully.

 

“It is what everyone thinks.”

 

“Nonsense.” Sakurai straightened his suit as their stop approached. “I can use the elevator as I please.”

 

The elevator rang harmoniously, and its doors opened to their floor. Sakurai proceeded while Aiba stayed behind, waiting for the trail of “good mornings” that followed the director down the hall to subside. Aiba appreciated Sakurai’s words, but it would certainly raise looks if Aiba would allow himself to be seen coming out behind him. No matter what the director may think, it was on Aiba they would give expression to their (possible) jealousy.

 

~

 

“Hey Aiba, can I have a minute?” Ikuta Toma called him to his desk just a row away from his own.

 

Regardless of being a long-recruited employee as Aiba himself and Mitsushima, Ikuta barely spoke to him unless he really needed to. The way Aiba remembered it, Ikuta had been much closer with Kazama than himself since the three of them use to share lunch when they first started working together. After a few years, Ikuta never found a reason to spend any more time with them, and even less with Aiba, after Kazama was gone. Meaning this “minute” he asked from Aiba would surely cost him a favor.

 

“I don’t know if it’s of any trouble, but I was asked to scan these and send them over to the production department,” as expected, he showed him a file with several labeled papers. “But I was asked to attend a meeting with a client at some restaurant, and if I don’t get out now, I might not make it in time.” He glanced at his wrist watch, as if their conversation was any more time consuming. “Think you can give me a hand?”

 

Aiba had also taken a glance at the time, knowing very well his own meeting could happen at any minute, but judging by Ikuta’s impatience, he still had some time to spare.

 

On Aiba’s approval to help, Ikuta thanked him endlessly before he’d even finished picking up his things to leave, but eventually, after promising him to return the favor for the tenth time, he took his leave. Aiba wondered if this was what Jun meant by “helping him when they decided to dump all the work on him”. Sadly, Ikuta must have been clever enough to tell Aiba would understand his worry and even worse, Matsumoto had not reported back to work that day either.

 

Regardless, there weren’t many papers to go through. Thankfully the printing room was empty which gave Aiba time to double check if all the papers were scanned without a flaw. After paging through them and beginning to prepare the email, Aiba carefully measured there was still time before his client’s arrival. The time it took for each file to load was crucial and consuming. It didn’t take long before the preparing of the email became a race with time. He revised the files one last time and once the mail was sent, he rushed towards the elevator, picking up his brief case and files with a few minutes to spare.

 

~

 

_‘Wondering about you.’_

_‘About your meeting, I mean.’_

_‘Text me when you can.’_

_‘Anon?’_

_‘Sorry, I just saw your message.’_

_‘Don’t mind it.’_

_‘Is everything okay?’_

_‘I… think so.’_

_‘You don’t sound too sure.’_

_‘You can tell?’_

_‘Should I be worried?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘I was just… not expecting this at all.’_

_‘They liked it. They were actually… impressed.’_

_‘The meeting must have lasted at least 40 minutes,_  
and the whole time, they were praising our work.   
They’ve agree for negotiations to continue and they’ll be  
 returning tomorrow to sign the contract.’

_‘Aiba… that’s amazing!’_

_‘I’m having a hard time taking it in.’_

_‘I’ve been sitting in the lobby since they left._  
I can’t believe what a rollercoaster of a week   
this has been.’

_‘I can imagine.’_

_‘It has worked out for the best.’_

_‘I’m happy for you. Truly.’_

_‘I guess I should be thanking you,  
for being there all this time.’_

_‘What are you saying? This was all your hard work.’_

_‘That I got through thanks to your support.’_

_‘Really. Thank you.’_

_‘I can’t believe it’s almost done!’_

_‘I guess you would want to celebrate this after.’_

_‘A cold beer would really hit the spot.  
I’ve been craving it lately.’_

_‘How about… a glass of wine and a meal?’_

_‘That could work too, although  
 I don’t have any at home.’_

_‘What if it doesn’t have to be at home?’_

_‘Why? Where else would it be?’_

_‘I mean… What if you don’t have to go home?’_

_‘For the wine and the food.’_

_‘??’_

_‘Maybe, we could go somewhere else?’_

_‘We?’_

_‘If you want to, of course.’_

_‘Anon…’_

_‘Are you… asking me out?’_

_‘…’_

_‘You’re saying you want to go somewhere?  
With me? You? Anon?’_

_‘If you want to.’_

_‘And, do you want me to?’_

_‘I am asking you.’_

_‘As in a date?’_

_‘You could call it that.’_

_‘And… you’ll be there?’_

_‘I suppose.’_

Aiba had to look up from his phone to realize his heart was pounding uncontrollably. Yet the serenity of the lobby forced him to seal in any trace of what the text he read was causing him to feel. His hand held on his chest as it started to hurt the more he read. His throat became dry right after, unable to utter a single word and even worst on forming them into text. His pause seemed to take so long, and Anon was typing again.

 

_‘If it’s any trouble, you can forget I said anything.’_

_‘Wait.’_

_‘You’ll be there?’_

_‘For real?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Maybe.’_

_‘How certain is maybe?’_

_‘Maybe I’ll be there.’_

_‘What if not?’_

_’I will still keep you company.’_

_‘And if I want you to be there no matter what?’_

_‘I will.’_

_‘You promise?’_

_‘I do.’_

~

 

_‘I know you must be busy, but I really need to talk to you.’_

_‘Can you wait for me when you’re done?’_

_‘Please, Nino? Before I do something stupid!’_

_‘Where are you?’_

_‘You already left, didn’t you?’_

_‘Still mad?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I wish you could tell me what’s going on.’_

_‘I’m really worried.’_

_‘If you need to talk, you know what to do.’_

~

 

Aiba had thought it was the night before his meeting when he’d found it most difficult to fall asleep, but that evening after tidying himself for bed, he’d saw the hours passing as he stared at his ceiling, his heart racing again, almost accidentally. His phone stared back at him from his bedside table as the thief of his sleep. Occasionally, he would grab it again to scan through their conversation again, finding it more difficult each time to close his eyes. Eventually, it was the reassuring thought of Anon’s promise that gave him peace of mind, putting all his trust in the man he talked to on his phone.

 

Coffee was much needed the next morning, but he decided to make some himself after receiving no response from Ninomiya yet. He understood now he had to take Anon’s words to heart and perhaps give him the space he needed, since he trusted he would come around when he was ready. Although this had him confused early in the morning, his surprise was different when a familiar voice greeted him “Good morning” in the break room.

 

“Jun!” Aiba exclaimed, finding the younger watching him by the door. “You’re back! You didn’t even tell me you were coming.”

 

“Guess I wanted to surprise you.” Jun’s smirk indicated he was more than pleased with his reaction.

 

“Then, I suppose everything is fine?” Aiba guessed.

 

“More or less,” Jun sighed moving into the room. “I was meaning to wait a little longer until things were for certain, but… my mother worried I was losing too many days of work. She made me come so I wouldn’t be in trouble or else, she said I would be in trouble with her.”

 

“I think you made the right choice.” Masaki laughed.

 

“I wasn’t really ready to leave her, but she knows about this whole deal with Sakurai and how it would only get worse. I think she noticed I was getting worried about work as well, after you told me what happened with the law firm.”

 

“It’s been a tough couple of days,” Aiba asserted. “Tensions in administration are building up, but nothing is for sure. I’d say, she was right about making you come, and from what I hear, I think she’s as concerned for you as you for her.” A small chuckle escaped Jun’s lips, a trace of color lighting his cheeks. “She’ll be fine. I can promise you that.”

 

There was no response from Jun other than his smile and the capturing of Masaki’s gaze in his, deep and warming as Jun’s eyes always felt. It was only when he moved away that the lure in his eyes broke and Masaki remembered his coffee was sitting, forgotten, on the counter.

 

“What about you?” Jun asked, fixing his curiosity on Aiba.

 

“What about me?”

 

“What are you up to?”

 

“The usual, I guess?” Masaki’s head tilted while he poured sugar in his cup.

 

“And you’re so well dressed today because…?” Jun eyed him with a smirk in his voice.

 

If it wasn’t for Jun’s suggestive tone, Masaki would have already forgotten his plans for that evening or even the fact that he’d decided to wear something different for work today. But adding a vest under his good suit was nothing to be surprised about, or was it? It just happened to be the first clothing item he laid eyes on that morning. It didn’t necessarily have to mean he was expecting something to happen that night.

 

“It’s nothing in particular,” Aiba lied through his teeth. “Why? Do I look weird?’

 

“I don’t know… Just a little different. Is it that meeting you have today?”

 

Masaki’s cup rested on his lips, hiding a shy smirk. “A meeting of some sort.”

 

But Jun’s suspicions didn’t die down throughout the day, even after Aiba had made the excuse of his contract signing that same evening. All day long, his attention kept fixing on Aiba as if inspecting, wondering if there was anything he may have missed over the days of his absence. But Aiba was unbreakable, and eventually, he decided to rely on Aiba’s words to convince him it was nothing he should worry about.

 

That afternoon, shortly after his meeting with their client had finished with the signing of the contract and a round of handshakes, Aiba received the much-awaited text. He waited before coming into the office to read his new message and observed as the sender typed into their chat.

 

_‘Bambino Restaurant. By the Tokyo Bay. 8:00pm.  
Reservations for Aiba Masaki.’_

_‘Don’t be late.’_

Masaki chuckled to himself with his last message when he should have felt offended.

 

_‘I wouldn’t miss it.’_

~

 

_‘Nino?’_

_‘This must be getting irritating for you but listen.’_

_‘I don’t trust anyone more than you, but I can’t ask for your  
 help if you’re still acting like this.’_

_‘I’ll go straight to the point.’_

_‘I’m sorry for being as carefree as you think I am._  
I am sorry for bothering you all those times we went for  
 ramen and I wouldn’t shut up about him.  
 I realize now it must have bothered you that  
 I didn’t talk about anything else. I admit it, you were right.  
 I am a complete idiot.’

 _‘I haven’t been acting like myself lately and I failed to realize_  
 that even after you did. I treated you like a stranger when  
 you were trying to be my friend. And I was a bigger idiot for not  
 listening to you and I’m probably the biggest idiot there is even now,   
so I will say it again… I’m sorry.’

 _‘I can’t say more right now because I have to go, and your phone_  
 is probably ringing like crazy and I know how much you  
 hate that, but I’m afraid I need to ask something from you.’

_‘If I don’t text you by midnight, call me. Okay?  
Please, don’t be alarmed. Would you do this for me?’_

_‘Good night.’_

~

 

Masaki stepped out of the cab to the location he’d specified the driver as Bambino by the Tokyo Bay. The establishment had a small entrance and a window modestly displaying its name. A small crowd was queuing by the door to be seated, as it appeared the place was small and crowded, mostly by couples as Masaki observed. But following the instructions he was given, he went inside when his clock marked the stated time and stood by the front desk.

 

When asked for reservation, Masaki gave his name timidly, afraid the very intimidating middle-aged receptionist would kick him out immediately after not finding him in the list. Yet instead, it was much to his surprise when the receptionist called for a waiter to show him to his table.

 

As soon as he was welcomed to leave his coat on the coat rack, he began to feel the nerves sinking in his stomach. Masaki was hesitant to follow the waiter deeper into the restaurant. He became too aware of himself with just the amount of people inside the place. But their eyes became nothing when Masaki realized the full extent of the restaurant he walked through. It was almost a narrow salon, extending vertically into two floors with round tables, lit by candles and other dimmer lights that gave way for the splendor of a chandelier to light up the rest of the room. Masaki had almost forgotten to follow his waiter, tranced by all its elegance and he would have stopped to admire it even more if he hadn’t remembered his table awaited.

 

The realization suddenly hit him when he wondered what he would do if he found the table occupied. Anon had promised him, after all, that he would be there, but to what extend did he agree to reveal himself to Aiba, he didn’t know. A knot tied in his stomach, almost forbidding him to move.

 

After crossing through the entire establishment, they finally arrived at his table. Located in the extreme end of the restaurant with the most breath-taking window view facing towards the Tokyo Bay, it was a small round table for two that, at the moment, remained empty.

 

The waiter offered him a seat which Aiba accepted with a still too hesitant tone of voice, his words being taken away by the beauty of the scenery. After placing a single menu on the table, the waiter asked him for a drink to start the evening, but Aiba could only request for water, not knowing if there were further plans he still didn’t know of.

 

The waiter moved out with his order and Masaki could finally lay back on his chair to take it all in. The place, the people, the view, everything was far too overwhelming he could barely think straight. It wasn’t until his eyes laid on the empty chair across the table that he decided to take out his phone, leaving the menu untouched. To his surprise, someone was already typing at the other side.

 

_‘You’re here.’_

_‘I’m having a lot of trouble deciphering  
what exactly is here.’_

_‘Are we even in Japan anymore?’_

_‘Do you like it?’_

_‘I love it! It is amazing! And the bay is so…!’_

_‘Beautiful?’_

_‘You took the words out of my mouth.’_

_‘It’s what came to mind when I saw you come in.’_

_‘You look amazing tonight.’_

_‘I can’t believe you actually came.’_

_‘Does that mean you’re here too?’_

_‘I promised you, didn’t I?’_

_‘Meaning… if I look around, I may catch  
 a glimpse of you looking my way?’_

_‘If you get lucky.’_

_‘Why? Do you work here? Is Anon actually living  
 a double life? Salary man by day, waiter by night?’_

_‘Wouldn’t that just be the most interesting  
 character you’ve heard of?’_

_‘It would be interesting to see the secret to your success.’_

_‘I’m afraid I can’t reveal such things right now,_  
but if you allow me, I would like to make use of   
my talent to serve you.’ 

_‘I would like to make your evening, Aiba Masaki.’_

_‘I’m listening.’_

_‘There will be three services. I will be recommending_  
 my favorite plates, if you don’t mind. I thought maybe  
 sharing my palate would satisfy your curiosity to learn  
 more about me.’

_‘That is indeed a desire I would very much like to satisfy.’_

_‘In addition, I will be choosing for wine. I know you_  
 wanted something strong but, I’m afraid we would  
 need something rather appropriate to the circumstances  
 in which we are meeting (just so you know, I don’t want to  
 get you drunk). I will allow you to make all themes of   
conversation you wish for this one night, meaning you  
 can ask whatever you want. Lastly, the receipt is mine,  
 so you are free to go at any point of the night. I will not   
be holding you here if you don’t want to or if you feel  
 uncomfortable. I wish only for you to enjoy your time.   
You deserve it after all.’

_‘Questions?’_

_‘This is a lot to take in.’_

_‘Am I over doing it?’_

_‘You can tell me if it gets weird. I’ll stop.’_

_‘No! This is all too sweet of you! I don’t think I deserve so much from you.’_

_‘It’s the least I could do.’_

_‘That’s hard to believe.’_

_‘It’s the truth.’_

_‘All of this?’_

_‘And all you leave me to do is say thank you?’_

_‘You being here is enough.’_

_‘I wish I could do more.’_

_‘In time.’_

_‘But now, it’s time for your wine.’_

His waiter approached not a moment later carrying a bottle of the tinted liquid and excused himself before pouring it into Masaki’s cup. A description of the drink was offered in Masaki’s phone while the author of his messages explained the reasons of his selection for their evening.

 

_‘I imagined it will suit your taste.’_

_‘It does!’_

_‘It’s very familiar, somehow.’_

_‘Really?’_

_‘Maybe my parents use to have it back at the restaurant.  
The strong smell really sends me back. It seems nostalgic.’_

_‘Did I pass?’_

_‘Perfectly!’_

_‘Phew…’_

_‘This is unfair.’_

_‘This must be costing you so much.  
 I don’t want to feel greedy.’_

_‘You’re not, Aiba. Really.’_

_‘Let me do something for you.  
 To, at least, compensate you for all of this.’_

_‘You don’t have to.’_

_‘Call me Masaki.’_

_‘…’_

_‘Use my first name from now on.’_

_‘I know it might not be much,  
but we can start from somewhere.’_

_‘What do you think?’_

_‘I don’t want you to think that you owe  
 me anything.’_

_‘But I want to. If it would at least make  
 you happy.’_

_‘Can I ask?’_

_‘What would it mean if I used your first name?’_

_‘I suppose… it’ll make us much closer.’_

_‘Why?’_

_‘Will it make you shy?’_

_‘You have an odd image of me being shy over  
everything.’_

_‘Says the guy who wouldn’t meet with  
his date face to face.’_

_‘That’s a different thing. I have my reasons.’_

_‘I would like to hear them.’_

_‘Before we get to that, it’s time to take your order.’_

Masaki was asked by Anon to direct his attention to the menu, showing him through the vast selection of plates for the first course. Their complexity in names and ingredients had left Masaki intimidated, but he had no doubt each one was as delicious as the last.

 

 

  _‘The chef’s selection for today is also a good choice,  
 but there are others I would prefer before that.’_

_‘Then… I’ll let you choose._  
You have recommendations,   
so let’s go with those.’

_‘All of them?’_

_‘Sure. You know them better than I do._  
I trust your taste. I’m sure you can make  
 it an interesting experience.’

_‘Alright, as you please.’_

The waiter returned, and Masaki dictated every plate that was texted to him by Anon. Although a keen curiosity may have crossed the other as Aiba read the plate’s names through his phone, he always displayed a smile and moved away with his order right after.

 

_‘Now… can I proceed with my questions?’_

_‘Of course.’_

_‘Tell me the reason you’re not sitting  
 right across me.’_

_‘I may or may not be busy right now.’_

_‘So, you are a waiter after all.’_

_‘I may be, for tonight.’_

_‘Are you my waiter?’_

_‘I doubt it though, he doesn’t look like you.’_

_‘What does that even mean?’_

_‘I mean… he doesn’t look like the **you** in my head.’_

_‘And how exactly do I look in your head?’_

_‘Well it’s nothing specific. I don’t have your eyes or  
 hair color or your face in detail.’_

_‘But your words, or rather the way I read your text_  
 kind of gives away a fraction of what your  
 voice would sound like.’

_‘Then, how would you describe it?’_

_‘Deep, passionate, a little timid sometimes.’_

_‘Haha.’_

_‘But overall… Gentle.’_

_‘It’s a voice that is hard to get tired of.’_

_‘That’s very nice of you to say.’_

_‘I hope I get to hear the real deal some time.’_

_‘It’s nothing extraordinary though. Average.’_

_‘Will you give me the chance to see for myself?’_

_‘Hmm…’_

_‘Have I heard it before? Is that why you don’t want to?’_

_‘Because I’ll know?’_

_‘…’_

_‘What?’_

_‘I can’t be getting too carried away, aren’t I?  
 You said I could ask anything.’_

_‘I’m sorry.’_

_‘Alright…’_

_‘Why do you insist on these secrets so much?’_

_‘To be honest…’_

_‘I thought it might make it interesting when_  
I first started texting you. But I realized it’s only  
 been hurting you so far.’

_‘Not necessarily.’_

_‘Some days I’m more confused than others.’_

_‘At least right now, on our date, I’m okay.’_

_‘You don’t hate it?’_

_‘No, not in particular.’_

_‘It takes away that awkwardness I usually  
feel when I go out with someone.’_

_‘I’m not saying this has to be any less of a date  
than the rest, but it’s different and it feels good.’_

_‘Still, if I’m very honest, I feel kind of nervous.’_

_‘Why is that?’_

_‘I don’t know what I’ll do if I see you tonight.’_

_‘Neither do I.’_

_‘But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to.’_

_‘Do you… still don’t want me to?’_

_‘It’s complicated.’_

_‘So complicated I wouldn’t understand?’_

_‘That’s where I feel nervous.’_

_‘Wait.’_

_‘My first plate is here!’_

_‘That was fast.’_

_‘Yeah, I like the service here too.’_

_‘It’s soup.’_

_‘That’s right.’_

_‘It’s smells incredible. My mouth is  
watering already.’_

_‘Stop texting and eat!’_

_‘Alright, I’ll partake!’_

_‘Do you like it?’_

_‘Shh! I’m eating.’_

_‘…’_

_‘…’_

_‘You can still text me occasionally you know.’_

_‘You told me to eat, so I’m eating.’_

_‘This is too good, even my eyes are watering.’_

_‘I’m glad to hear that.’_

_‘I just thought of another question.’_

_‘Yes?’_

_‘Give me a letter from your name.’_

_‘?’_

_‘Supposing your name was in romaji,  
will you give me a letter?’_

_‘Hm…’_

_‘It doesn’t have to be the first letter.  
 Any other letter is fine.’_

_‘I’m not holding back!’_

_‘I guess… it is only fair.’_

_‘Your answer?’_

_‘O.’_

_‘O?’_

_‘Mhm.’_

_‘There is also and “O” in Anon.  
You’re not trying to trick me, are you?’_

_‘No, I don’t intend to trick you.’_

_‘I’ll take it.’_

_‘An “O” huh?’_

_‘Yeah.’_

_‘Family name or given name?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Also, more than one?’_

_‘No comment.’_

_‘Hmp…’_

_‘Are you done with your soup?’_

_‘Almost.’_

_‘It’s better to eat while warm. Don’t let it get too cold.’_

_‘Your second plate should be arriving soon.’_

_‘Can’t wait!’_

_‘You can take your time though, we have all night.’_

_‘And I suppose you’ll use my name  
at some point of the evening, no?’_

_‘Right…’_

_‘May I ask, why the sudden urge for me to type your name?’_

_‘I don’t know… maybe I want to  
 imagine your voice saying it.’_

_‘Because?’_

_‘Because I imagine it’ll make you blush.’_

_‘And it’ll be easier to spot you from my table.’_

_‘Quite humorous tonight, aren’t you?’_

_‘I’m in a good mood, yes. The food is really  
hitting the spot.’_

_‘Are you eating too, Anon?’_

_‘I ate.’_

_‘I’m just having a glass for now.’_

_‘Second plate is here!’_

_‘As I imagined, pasta.’_

_‘It goes well after the soup. Give it a try.’_

_‘Can we make a toast first?’_

_‘A toast?’_

_‘I realized we haven’t so it’ll be nice.’_

_‘And what would you toast for?’_

_‘For closing the contract and… For having  
someone like you.’_

_‘What will you toast for?’_

_‘For meeting you, Masaki.’_

Aiba was glad for once Anon wasn’t sitting right across from him, or he would catch the deep shade of color on his face, and how he was unable to hold back the smile on his lips, as he drank to Anon’s toast.

 

As the night’s conversation increased, time made them both engaged in one another. Masaki hadn’t acknowledged the lights in the room got dimmer the later it became, for the light of his phone screen was all he saw. He’d barely noticed his third plate arriving at his table and almost forgot to complement Anon on his selection for dessert, which was as exquisite as everything else he’d experienced that night.

 

Even after his last plate remained empty and his waiter had filled his cup for a third time, Aiba had no plans of leaving his table yet. Not while he was in the middle of his conversation and the night felt too young to finish so soon. He refused to believe how late it’d gotten. He wished only for Anon to not notice so he wouldn’t leave. Masaki dreaded the thought of seeing him go, so he carried on further with their conversation if it only meant the night would last a little longer.

 

 

_‘How long has it been since  
 you first texted me?’_

_‘A few months.’_

_‘A lot has happened since then,  
but I feel like I’ve known you for longer.’_

_‘I know what you mean.’_

_‘Have you been there all this time?’_

_‘Depends if you’ve noticed me.’_

_‘I want to. More than anything right now.’_

_‘Have I talked to you before in person?’_

_‘You talk to many at the office.’_

_‘Has it ever been you?’_

_‘It’s safe to say it has.’_

_‘How was it? That first time we talked.’_

_‘That’s a good question.’_

_‘Do you remember it?’_

_‘I do.’_

_‘What exactly do you remember?’_

_‘You.’_

_‘What about me?’_

_‘I just remember you. You were all I saw.’_

_‘What did I do to make you remember me?’_

_‘You made me smile, when I hadn’t  
 smiled for a really long time.’_

_‘Did you realized then that you liked me?’_

_‘I’m not sure. I can’t pinpoint the exact_  
same moment. It was rather an odd combination   
of things that made me realize you stood out above all.  
 Maybe I’d liked you since before, but I never admitted   
it to myself. Maybe I tried to convince myself at some   
point I didn’t really like you, but you made it impossible for me.   
Maybe it was all at once.’

_‘You hide away so much, you don’t want me to_  
know who you are, does that mean you regret   
having gotten this far into knowing me?’

_‘No.’_

_‘I don’t think I would be as happy as I am  
 now if I would have chosen to forget you.’_

_‘But I still wonder what it means that you  
 haven’t forgotten me either.’_

_‘Would you believe me if I told you  
 I wonder about that myself?’_

_‘I wish I could get an answer out of you.’_

_‘I promised you, didn’t I?’_

_‘It’s only fair that I should, but even now,  
 I don’t know what to say.’_

_‘Rather than what you think, I would like to know  
how you feel. About me. About all of this.’_

_‘Why is it that you rather sit there than go home?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I am… confused.’_

_‘You make me confused.’_

_‘May I ask why?’_

_‘It’s not that there is something tearing me apart,  
 but it is you I’m confused about.’_

_‘Because I feel I know you, I feel you are real,_  
but no matter what I do, I can’t prove it. And because you’re so far   
away from my understanding I can’t prove what I feel either.   
And maybe… I’m just going crazy over everything.’

_‘You’re not crazy.’_

_‘But I am.’_

_‘And being here all this time only makes it_  
more obvious. Talking to you like this, when it should   
be different. It should be you, sitting across from me   
and not just my phone. We could talk and eat and laugh  
 together if only you would be willing to.’

 _‘We could be meeting face to face and looking into each other_  
 and realizing that we both want the same things, that we  
 both feel the same way. But it can’t be like that, because   
this is anything but ordinary. But the worst part is that   
I’m not doing anything to stop it. Because, maybe…   
I don’t want it to stop. And maybe I want this   
more than I should.’

 _‘Even when I call you Anon, you still are who I want._  
And because I don’t know if it’s in any way real,   
I’m reduced to think it’s the idea of you that I’m in love with.’

_‘Masaki…’_

_‘Still think I’m not crazy?’_

_‘This is my fault.’_

_‘I shouldn’t be the coward I am, but I don’t know_  
what to do when it comes to you and it has lead   
me to do this.’

 _‘I did wrong. And I continue to do wrong, because_  
I haven’t changed my mind either. I believe it’s better   
that we stay this way, in this distance. And if I’ve really   
hurt you that way, maybe it’s time that we both forget it as well.’

_‘Is that what you really think?’_

_‘Is that truly how you feel?’_

_‘I don’t. But it’s for the best.’_

_‘Then you’re cowering away again?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I wonder what it is that you want  
to protect so much.’_

_‘To be so strong as to control your feelings,  
it must really be important.’_

_‘Far more than what you can imagine.’_

_‘Then I won’t doubt you.’_

_‘But I can’t agree with you.’_

_‘Because I at least want to prove how real you are.’_

_‘How?’_

_‘I want to feel you close to me.’_

_‘Not all the way across the room or at the  
other end of the office, but next to me.’_

_‘Then… if it’s for you, I want to try.’_

_‘What do you mean?’_

_‘Wait’_

Seeing the other had stopped typing, Masaki’s attention left his phone to contemplate the room. His eyes searched through it vaguely, half wanting to find someone that he could recognize and half not wanting to see anything at all. His feelings wavered, impatient to know why the other had to make him wait any longer. Finally, he’d returned to the chat, but his typing took longer than expected.

_‘There is a back door just down the hall behind you._  
 An emergency exit should be there. If you go through,   
you’ll be right outside to the balcony. It is the sight you  
 can see through your window.’

_‘Go to the veranda and wait there, facing the view.’_

_‘Anon?’_

_‘Once you do so, would you close your eyes as well?’_

_‘You’re serious?’_

_‘Will you?’_

_‘Wait.’_

_‘What if you’re someone who is out of my league?’_

_‘Don’t worry.’_

_‘You already are beyond mine.’_

~

 

The view of the Tokyo Bay was much clearer from the outside, separated by the veranda and the skyline of the illuminated city. A wind was blowing heavily on Masaki reminding him of the absence of his coat, but knowing he couldn’t go back to find it, he’d compromised with waiting just a little longer. If it hadn’t been for the strong pounding in his chest, the night would have been soundless. He rubbed his hands to look for heat, but they still shook with the anticipation of hearing the emergency door creak open.

 

He tried taking in the fresh air, fixing on just a single spot of the view, and waiting for the butterflies in his stomach to settle. If only he would have given Masaki more time, perhaps it would have worked to make him feel calm, but the small creak was enough to make him jolt and become paralyzed.

 

It became so silent, Masaki could hear the other’s steps coming closer behind him, but slowly and timidly, as if there were a possibility that Masaki would escape. Masaki didn’t move, and he suddenly remembered the condition he’d agreed to. It was almost painful to abandon the view in front of him to find himself in the wavering dark, but if it was of any help for the other to overcome his insecurity, Masaki could agree his sense of sight was of little importance.

 

Masaki felt nothing, as if the approaching footsteps had been a product of his imagination. Everything became silence once more. Masaki felt a loss of breath as he’d been bracing himself all this time, and made himself dizzy, waiting for the first signs of presence from the other, making every second unbearable the more they hesitated.

 

Suddenly, a weight was dropped over Masaki’s shoulders, making him gasp suddenly, shortly to realize he was being sheltered from the cold. It only took him a moment to feel the fabric and realize it was his own coat hanging familiarly on his shoulders. The contact with the fabric had driven most of his trembling away and what remained was caused by the person who stood barely centimeters away from him.

 

At first, it was just the touch of _his_ fingers meeting Masaki’s with a small brush, hesitantly wondering if it was okay to stay. After a much bold attempt, Masaki made enough contact to allow _him_ to go further, reaching towards the other’s warm touch, until _he_ held Masaki’s hand gently in _his_.

 

Meanwhile, Masaki took all the mental notes he could about the smoothness of _his_ palm, the firmness in _his_ finger and the electricity to _his_ touch. He tried drawing the images that had started forming in his head, but regardless, it wasn’t enough. He needed to know more.

 

Masaki’s hand abandoned the touch of _his_ finger and began to trace up _his_ arm, feeling the texture of _his_ clothes. He continued wondering just how far he could go on, yet the other’s hand never came to stop him and before he knew it, Masaki’s hand rested over _his_ chest. Something drummed under the mass of _his_ clothes, and it increased the further _he_ allowed Masaki’s touch to wander.

 

The tip of his finger found _his_ neck hesitantly, knowing that the one thing he much desired to open his eyes to was there. He reached for _his_ face and found comfort in _his_ warm cheeks. He traced _his_ jawline, looking for its form, trying to find a name. But it was no use being deprived from the only sense that could tell him once and for all. Nonetheless, he was decided to try again if it wasn’t for the lips that his fingers found in their way, that made Masaki pull back at once.

 

The other didn’t seem to make a sound, and while Masaki wondered if he should utter a word of apology, he felt the other’s warmth shortening their distance, enough for Masaki to hear _him_ breathe shakenly.

 

Masaki felt _his_ hand, this time entwinning their fingers making it impossible to let go. For a long second that expanded with each breath, he thought he would hear something from the other, but not a word came. It was only but _his_ hand reaching behind Masaki’s neck, the new contact making him gasp and part his lips. The invitation was all but ignored when he felt the other’s body leaning closer and slightly brushing the entrance to Masaki’s lips before claiming them at once.

 

 _His_ kiss, smooth and careful, caused Masaki to respond. The latter’s hand moving to tug lightly on the other’s coat as his heart accelerated. A sweet sensation seemed to spark and drape Masaki’s body, wishing only for _his_ lips to say more, hoping to find the answer he looked for there.

 

Regretfully, his lips pulled away gradually, almost apologizing for the promptness of their arrival when the only remorse that persisted was when Masaki wondered why they didn’t stay any longer.

 

It seemed as though _he_ heard Aiba’s thoughts when _he_ felt his firm grip still pulling on _his_ clothes, unwilling to let him go, wondering if he reached far enough he would still find _him_ again. Instead, they stumbled clumsily, with the side of _his_ nose due to Masaki’s miscalculation. Although he drew back embarrassed, Masaki’s attempt was all but ignored when the other’s hand cupped his cheek and guided him back into their kiss.

 

The gentleness of the other’s touch deepened and Aiba’s heart was sent ablaze with each alluring brush. _He_ wished it would have lasted longer, but _he_ recognized the increasing temptation that, eventually, wouldn’t allow them to break apart, and it took the other all _his_ strengths to find himself again, and brashly pull away. Their lips parted with a sound, as they realized they were short of breath.

 

Masaki felt the strong urge to open his eyes again, a battle he could barely fight against instinct. But feeling the other’s hand grabbing on his to pull his grip away, he remembered to resist. The moment _his_ touch fluttered away, he heard his urgent steps turning and fading, feeding the distance between them until there was nothing to hear. Still in the attempt to prove _his_ fleeting, Masaki’s hand reached out in front of him and was only welcomed by _his_ absence.

 

He didn’t dare open them, unafraid of the dark but terrified to find nothing but the vacant night. He turned around, his hands finding the veranda as his body trembled once more. When his eyes opened, he was comforted by the lights of the skyline that were still present. He realized there was only him in the silence. Still his fingers traced his lips again, willing to find a piece of _him_ there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 7. Bet you didn't know this was a date chapter. Anon has appeared in front of Aiba so he is real after all, right? Does Aiba finally have a clue now after that kiss or is he only more confused? We'll see what happens in our next chapter. Thanks for reading~!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 8 is here! Will we be getting some answers? I am loving your comments and support~! They are very helpful and give me so much energy! Long chapter ahead. A very special thanks to my friend Dhay for her help ^^ Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 

“So… What’s new?” Nino took a swig of beer, inviting Aiba to talk.

 

Aiba looked up, suddenly brought back to reality by Nino’s voice, as if just realizing he was sitting across from him that whole time. He’d been rather quiet since Nino had finally agreed to meet with him at the usual place. “Not much.”

 

Nino would have expected to find Aiba a lot more eager to see him, but instead, Aiba had left his drink untouched, without speaking a word or giving another apology like the ones he had sent Nino in his text messages.

 

Ninomiya frowned at his friend, his body language saying more than his words. “You sure?”

 

Aiba affirmed it with a nod that was all but convincing.

 

“Then, what was this thing you texted about… _‘doing something stupid’_?” Nino asked, watching how Aiba’s expression changed completely. “And what you wrote about me calling you if you didn’t text by midnight? Care to explain that?”

 

“I was drunk.” Aiba said quickly while Nino rose a brow at him. “I was very drunk.” Even though his words wouldn’t work to fool the other, Aiba still knew his excuse would sound more believable to Nino than the truth.

 

Ninomiya set his cup aside before he cleared his throat. His arms crossed over the table as he looked straight at Aiba. “I appreciate what you’re doing, but… I’m also trying really hard right now to make small talk and you’re not much of a help here. So, I want to hear about anything. That is including Anon.”

 

Aiba wouldn’t have expected to hear Nino addressing the root of his distraction, but once he’d heard his name being spoken, it was inevitable to deny it.

 

“What if… nothing has happened with him so far?” Aiba tried.

 

“I highly doubt that. You talk every single day, don’t you?”

 

“Yeah, but it’s just… talk.”

 

“About?” Nino nudged him to go into details.

 

Aiba, in the other hand, doubted he were really interested to know. “Many things.”

 

“Like?”

 

“I can’t possibly remember all!”

 

“Can you admit you haven’t learned anything about him?”

 

Aiba avoided Nino’s stare. Other than a very detailed description of the warmness of _his_ touch, the softness of _his_ lips or even the smell of _his_ piercing cologne, Aiba had nothing to share with Nino.

 

“But that was the point of all of this, no?” Added Nino. “Don’t you have any sort of lead to track down who he really is?”

 

“I’m… not sure.” Aiba responded, weakly.

 

“Do you even want to anymore or… are you actually scared to know?”

 

Aiba always hated how easy it was for the younger to get in his head. He was nothing but an open book for Ninomiya, as if his insecurities were placed one by one before him.

 

“It’ll be pathetic if I just left it as secret, but… I guess I’m not too sure of what to think anymore, when it comes to him.”

 

“Because it would mean a lot to you,” said Ninomiya suddenly. “Once you know who he is, the question would be if you would rather date them or not. You don’t want it to come to something you’d rather regret, is that it?”

 

Aiba wondered to himself if he’d already crossed that line where he would regret it all. “At least… I know I’ll have an answer for him when the time comes. That much I promised him.”

 

“Wouldn’t it be hard if you had to turn them down after all?” Asked Nino.

 

“Of course it would. It always is…”

 

“Would you reject them if it turns out they’re not exactly who you expected them to be? You know, like… someone you barely know or… someone other than Jun?”

 

Aiba sighed. “I’ll do my best to judge it when the time comes.”

 

“Any idea when that will be?” Nino asked, not with the irritation his voice reflected all those other times he’d asked, but with genuine concern.

 

Aiba shook his head. “If I were to insist much more, it would probably scare him away.”

 

This time, Ninomiya scoffed. “And you actually like a guy like that?”

 

Aiba pouted at the younger. “I never said I liked him.”

 

“You didn’t have to. It’s all over your face.” Ninomiya downed a large swig of beer before setting his cup down. Allowing himself a second of silence, his gaze followed the marks on the table distractedly. The corner of his lips curled as if a thought had come back to him suddenly. “To be honest… this whole deal with Anon texting you day and night and you obsessing over a stalker is probably your dumbest move yet.” Although offended, Aiba listened. “But, I have to admit… I haven’t seen you in such a good mood over anything in a pretty long time.”

 

Masaki looked away, trying to hide the smile that Ninomiya’s words provoked in him, causing him to recognize he had truly missed his friend.

 

“I know I haven’t been the most approving with Anon,” Nino continued. “but if you’re serious about this, I’ll try all I can to understand your feelings.”

 

Aiba’s eyes smiled at the other, touched by his gesture, knowing it must be costing him all his strengths. Overwhelmed by his words, Aiba whispered a deep “Thank you,” for only Nino to hear, which the latter was too flushed to accept and brushed off as he drank.

 

Aiba left out a deep sigh, collecting himself again. “Enough about me.” He intended to break the atmosphere at their table. “I want to hear what you’ve been up to all this time.”

 

Nino seemed flattered by his attempt. “I’ve been around… thinking.”

 

“About?” It was Aiba’s turn to invite him to abound.

 

“A lot… nothing else, really. I’ve… been thinking too much.” Aiba noticed how the younger lost himself in thought and only came back when he realized Aiba’s gaze was still locked on him.

 

“You won’t say anything at all?” Aiba asked.

 

Nino shook his head, regretfully. “Not now.” He said, wishing he could hide from Aiba’s eyes. “I still need some time.”

 

Even if Nino had agreed to see him that day, Aiba understood he needed to be more patient and give him the space he needed before he could truly come back. His attempt to see him that day was more than what Aiba could be thankful for. For now, he could only rest assured that he still hadn’t lost his friend.

 

~

 

_‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen a rainier day  
than the ones I don’t see you.’_

_‘Anon?’_

_‘That’s really sweet of you.’_

_‘Haven’t seen you all morning. Are you not  
coming in today?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘I think I got a cold. Couldn’t even get  
out of bed this morning.’_

_‘Oh... I’m sorry.’_

_‘I’ll be fine. I hope it’s no trouble though,  
I had to stay home.’_

_‘No, of course not.’_

_‘Only trouble’s that it had to be you  
who got sick.’_

_‘Again, you’re very sweet.’_

_‘Ugh… And I actually wanted to go to  
work today.’_

_‘Seriously?’_

_‘Okay, maybe not “wanted” but I had things to do._  
It’ll be bad if there were a setback in the project  
 because of me.’

_‘Why don’t you take today to rest and not  
 think about work for a bit?’_

_‘Besides, the sooner you get better, the sooner  
 you can come back.’_

_‘You’re right… I can’t even think  
straight right now.’_

_‘What are you feeling?’_

_‘Headache. My nose is on fire, as well as my throat.  
Even my eyes hurt. It’s pretty bad.’_

_‘That can’t be good.’_

_‘Have you checked your temperature?’_

_‘Not yet. I had to lay down for a bit.’_

_‘Stay in bed as much as you need to.’_

_‘Thanks.’_

_‘Although what I really need is some  
 medicine.’_

_‘Think you can take care of it?’_

_‘If I manage to get out of bed.’_

_‘Anon, bad news…’_

_‘?’_

_‘I think I may have forgotten to re-stock  
on meds.’_

_‘I have the worst luck.’_

_‘You don’t have medicine?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘And I really can’t go out in this weather.’_

_‘Don’t you have someone you could  
 ask for help?’_

_‘You’ve made up with Nino, no?  
Maybe you could call him?’_

_‘I could ask him, but he won’t come until_  
after he’s done with his shift. You know…   
because “pay day is coming up”.’

_‘What about a family member?’_

_‘They all live in Chiba and they must very busy._  
 I don’t want to ask for them to come all   
the way here for a minor cold.’

_‘Meaning…?’_

_‘You’re alone?’_

_‘Yeah… seems like it.’_

_‘Have you eaten anything?’_

_‘Only a little. I’m just really tired.’_

_‘Anyway, I’m feeling kind of dizzy._  
I’ll text Nino later. I’d rather   
take a nap right now.’

_‘Alright.’_

_‘If there’s anything I can do for you,  
don’t hesitate to ask.’_

_‘Do you mean that?’_

_‘Every word.’_

_‘Then… do you think it’ll be stupid if I gave  
you my address?’_

_‘You could come, if you can...’_

_‘…’_

_‘What am I saying? I can’t make you  
miss work.’_

_‘It’s not that…’_

_‘I just didn’t think you would suggest it.’_

_‘It’s stupid, I know. I’m probably hallucinating by_  
saying this but… I hate being alone. Especially  
 when I’m feeling this sick.’

_‘I don’t know what else to do.’_

_‘Would you come?’_

_‘If I get you something to make you feel less worse,  
I could be of some help to you.’_

_‘There is drug store not far from my place. You could  
leave it at the door if it bothers you.’_

_‘I wouldn’t mind though, if you came in.’_

_‘I trust you enough.’_

_‘And I promise not to look.’_

_‘You would do that?’_

_‘I’ve done a lot more already, haven’t I?’_

_‘Rest for now.’_

_‘Okay.’_

_‘Masaki?’_

_‘You awake?’_

_‘It’s almost my lunch break.’_

_‘Can you wait a little?’_

_‘Yeah.’_

_‘I’ll send you my address in a bit.’_

 

…

 

A light knock on the front door awoke Masaki on the sofa. Even on his subconscious, he could tell it was _him_. When he tried to utter an answer, he found his voice trapped in the burning walls of his throat. It was worthless to try. Another knock came but after giving it enough thought, the knob rattled after noticing the door was unlock and it opened hesitantly.

 

Masaki expected a greeting as _he_ came in, or just a hint of _his_ voice would have been enough, but in its absence, he acknowledged _he_ was being careful once again. Masaki heard the door close behind _him_ , which could only mean he’d decided to come in.

 

Masaki buried himself in his sheets. Other than the goosebumps running through his body, he felt his heart starting to race. Suddenly he couldn’t tell if this was a good idea after all.

 

A pair of feet moved across the room, standing close behind the sofa before moving away again. The sound of a bag rustled and settled on top of his kitchen counter. Slowly, packages were taken out one by one. _He_ walked once again, closer to the sofa, trusting Aiba’s sight was obstructed underneath his sheets. _He_ placed the store-bought goods on his coffee table, close enough to Aiba’s reach. But when _he_ began to move away again, Masaki found enough strength to make use of his voice.

 

“Anon…?” It came weak and hoarse but still enough to make _him_ stop and turn around.

 

 _He_ realized now _he_ didn’t have to hide, noticing the eye mask that covered Masaki’s sight. _He_ initially thought _he_ would be calm once _he_ knew he couldn’t see _him_ , but now _he_ couldn’t help but think of how vulnerable Masaki had made himself if only to please _him._ And _he_ hated it.

 

A hand peeked from the covers, reaching out to what could receive it, not disappointed when it found _his_ touch. The same warmness he’d come to know that night, that same gentle feeling when he held _his_ hand. It was almost too well printed in his skin, like a memory. Aiba’s grip refused to let go, eventually forcing _him_ to lean down closer. They seemed like the smallest minutes while he felt _him_ beside him, but it felt like everything. Eventually, it was not just _his_ thumb tracing over Aiba’s hand, but _his_ remaining hand had found a place on Aiba’s head, grazing his hair as _he_ invited him to rest.

 

 _His_ grip loosened, and understanding _he_ asked for Masaki to do the same, he regretfully let go. He felt _him_ once again moving into his kitchen, this time, opening drawers, hearing the clattering of glass, the door to his fridge and the pouring of a liquid. When _his_ feet returned to his side, _his_ hand shook him gently. Dazed between sleep and consciousness, Masaki sat up on the sofa laboriously, unknowing on what the other tried to signal him.

 

Aiba felt a new weight sinking on the sofa and setting beside him suddenly. Masaki’s sense all turned to _his_ motions. There was surely an opening of a package and the rattling of pills. Masaki felt _his_ hand pulling on his, inviting him to open his palm and giving him a single pill, which Masaki felt carefully. A cold glass was pressed into his other hand as _he_ invited him to take it.

 

Masaki drank the medicine without complaints, sharing the other’s silence as he finished his glass and the other was ready to take it off his hands. Noticing his shivering, _he_ began to tug Masaki into his sheets once more, straightening them over his shoulders securely. But Masaki was not planning to lay down again. Instead he waited for something the other refused to give him.

 

“Anon,” Masaki voiced, this time much clearer than the last. “Thank you.” His hand reached for _him_ , to know _he_ hadn’t left his side. “I think I haven’t said it enough, and I’m sorry… I’ve asked so much from you,”

 

A response came from the other, although not verbally, as _his_ hand grabbed fondly on Masaki’s.

 

“This seems really selfish of me, but… I knew you wouldn’t let me down. You care about me and you worry so much… It’s almost unfair… that I have nothing to give back.”

 

Masaki felt the other’s leaning until he felt the placement of tender lips pressing on his cheek. The suddenness of _his_ gesture brought color to Masaki’s cheeks.

 

Masaki chuckled. “That… I guess I did give you. But honestly, even I’ve been wondering… if what we did was correct.” Masaki’s hand gradually draws away from the other’s touch. “Lately… I haven’t been able to recognize what is appropriate anymore.” There was an unmistakable doubt in his voice that restrained the other from reaching for Masaki’s hand again.

 

“Don’t get me wrong. You are a wonderful person and this time with you has only taught me that I wish I knew you sooner,” Masaki is searching again, his fingers tracing on the other until his hand rests on _his_ cheek. “That I wish I knew more… But I know you asked me to wait. I know… but I thought…” He pauses, his voice dry and in pain, yet the other’s silence allowed for his words to come slowly. “I thought I could. I just want to know how much more time you need, because… I don’t know how much longer I can go on pretending I know you.”

 

“And I know I promised you an answer to your feelings, but… I don’t know if I can give you anything as we are right now. Maybe… if you gave me a hint, a sign… maybe I could stop feeling so confused. If you could talk to me… or if you just let me see,” The other took Masaki’s hand, drawing it away from _his_ cheek and letting it rest in _his_ hand instead.

 

A knot seemed to tie on Aiba’s throat. The lack of an answer from the other slowly pushing tears into his hidden eyes. “You won’t say anything… why? What are you afraid of?” Masaki asked without receiving an answer. “Is it because of me? After all this time… do you still doubt yourself so much?”

 

He waited for a move, a word, but nothing came, as if the other had deprived him from perceiving sound as well. Masaki sighed. “Why did you come? Was there a reason? Other than me? Tell me anything and I’ll believe you. If you don’t refuse… I guess there is no use of me wearing this anymore…” Masaki’s reached for his eye mask without hesitation when he felt his hands being pulled away abruptly, forbidding him from going on any further.

 

Finding enough of an answer in _his_ actions, Masaki didn’t struggle against _him_ , letting the other realize it by himself until he let go of Masaki’s wrist quickly and regretfully. Masaki understood now it was meaningless to expect the other’s voice, no matter how much _he_ probably meant to apologize.

 

“I can’t change your mind… can’t I?” Masaki asked with hurt.

 

Masaki felt the sofa shifting, the other’s weight leaning closer until his touch bestowed him a print of his lips in his forehead. _He_ was sorry. This time, Masaki couldn’t hold back his frustration and it came out in the form of tears his eye mask refused to let show.

 

“You know… If you keep doing that, you’ll end up getting sick. If you don’t come in the office, maybe then… I’ll know,” Masaki feels the other shifting in the sofa, inching away subtly. “Is it really that obvious?” he asked _him_ , receiving a silence that said it all. “Then, why do I still doubt who you are?” His voice broke. After another failed response, he resigned.

 

Masaki dried his nose, tiered and ill, he tugged himself back on his covers. “It must be getting late,” Masaki refused to face _him_. “I shouldn’t have kept you this long. You should go.” He said no more, decided to lay back on the sofa to resume with his rest.

 

He’d waited for the moment the other finally left his side, wondering if maybe he hoped a little longer, something would change _his_ mind, but no matter how much _he_ hesitated before moving away, it wasn’t enough to make _him_ stay. The other’s feet moved across the room, perhaps taking things of his own _he’d_ scattered. There was only a brief second when _his_ steps stopped by the door, wanting to utter something Masaki couldn’t hear or just to look back at him a last time, almost as if knowing _he_ wouldn’t be able to do so in a long time.

 

Eventually, Masaki heard his door opening and closing just as quickly, but all he could do was sink into his covers, refusing to take his eye mask off and give in to the tears that he’d been holding back.

 

~

 

When he came back to his senses, he realized his eyes stung. His body began to ache by the position he’d assumed on the sofa although it hadn’t felt like much had passed since he’d gone to sleep. He was about to search for his phone when realized he wasn’t alone in his apartment. The source of sound came from his kitchen, a constant opening and closing of drawers. He hadn’t been expecting anyone as he recalled, but he did remember _him_.

 

Masaki swore _he_ had just left, but the pace and the silence with which _he_ moved across the room said otherwise. Had _he_ regretted leaving so suddenly? Or had _his_ parting all been a product of his fever? Masaki understood there was only one way of knowing.

 

Quietly, he removed the sheets from over his head and pulled off the eye mask daringly. His eyes took their time to get adjusted to the light in the room, but before his vision would clear, the one by the kitchen took notice of him.

 

“You’re finally up?” Nino asked, the sharp sound of knifes working over the kitchen counter. “You slept like a log.”

 

Aiba sat up on the sofa with drowsy eyes. “What time is it?”

 

“Late enough,” Nino moved from the kitchen to bring a steaming cup to Aiba by the sofa. “Would’ve come here sooner if my manager wouldn’t have asked for me to close today. That jerk… and he knew I was in a hurry.”

 

Masaki took the warm cup from Nino and drank from it before he was suddenly surprised by its bitter taste. “What is this?” Aiba groaned with disgust. “It’s bad!”

 

“It’s medicinal, and you’re drinking all of it.” Nino moved back into the kitchen where the stoves were lit and a strong smell was starting to spread in Aiba’s apartment. “I brought you some things, although it looked like you’d already done some shopping yourself.”

 

Aiba was about to question him before he noticed the pills and cough drops laying on his coffee table. So, it hadn’t been a dream.

 

“Are you feeling any better?” Nino asked, but Aiba was still distracted, looking at the things _he_ had brought for him as if they were trace of _him_ themselves.

 

“Yeah… a little.”

 

“Then finish your tea. The food is almost done.”

 

Ninomiya served him their dinner not much later and assumed his usual position by the coffee table as they ate, leaving the sofa solely for Aiba.

 

“Jun came around the café today,” Nino started, catching Aiba’s attention almost instantly. “He was asking about you. Seemed pretty worried.”

 

“He always worries…”

 

“You’re going to ask him out?”

 

Masaki paused over his food to stare at the younger. “Why you ask?”

 

“I don’t know. You two seem to be waiting for each other to do something and it’s getting kind of pathetic to watch,” Masaki pouted although he couldn’t deny the blush appearing in his cheeks. “So? Are you giving it a shot?”

 

Masaki became silent as if considering his words before he realized he couldn’t bring a certain person out of his thoughts. He wondered, still, if there were a possibility that Ninomiya spoke of the same person.

 

“Do you really think he likes me that way?” Aiba asked, almost making Nino choke on his food.

 

The younger wiped his mouth, unable to contain a laugh. “You’re kidding, right?” Masaki looked at Nino innocently, having perceived no joke from his own words. “You’re seriously the worst at picking up flirting, aren’t you?” Ninomiya laughed again.

 

Although Masaki still seemed confused with his assumption, seeing the younger laugh so whole-heartedly warmed Masaki more than the food Nino had made for them.

 

~

 

Aiba admitted Anon did right on not texting him. There was nothing he could have said to make Masaki feel any better, nor did Masaki know how he would respond if Anon sent a new message. It had become difficult to find the words that would encourage another conversation with Anon as he was now, and he wished for nothing but to avoid it most of all. He would have even considered to leave his phone behind, if it wasn’t for the fact that he needed it for work. Eventually, he decided to relay on the idea that Anon would understand he needed time away from their chat and his messages.

 

Just as Ninomiya had predicted, Jun had been expecting Aiba’s arrival that morning most anxiously. The moment Aiba stepped into the office, immediately he found the younger facing the entrance as if he’d been imagining he would walk in at any minute. He received Aiba with an expectant smile, as if knowing Aiba wouldn’t let him down. He did not delay on helping Aiba catch up in both work and with his own individual matters, as Masaki had insisted on asking about his mother’s recovery. Jun assured him she was fine, insisting Masaki shouldn’t worry when he’d just gotten sick himself.

 

“It was nothing,” Aiba claimed. “Just a minor cold. I’m all better already.”

 

“I’m… happy to hear that, because… I was wondering… You know I’ve been working some extra hours these past few days and I think it might be enough to get off early today. So, I meant to ask you if you were free? Tonight?”

 

Jun’s words certainly came boldly, although Aiba couldn’t help but infer his promptness would have been the work of another. And just as he had listened to his friend before, his answer came with no hesitation.

 

“I would like that… very much.”

 

As the office resumed with its usual pace that day, things were finally starting to subside in the company, as Aiba perceived. For a moment, he no longer felt himself carrying the same burdens he’d once worried about before. Rumors of bankruptcy were no longer spreading, and tensions had suddenly subsided. Perhaps now, he thought, things were beginning to normalize for the better. And he wished it would have lasted longer.

 

The director came out of his office abruptly and faced the room in silence while the secretary followed behind him hastily. It seemed his presence was not enough to call for the attention of his employment. It wasn’t until they heard his door slam shut that the room finally rose its attention towards him.

 

At first glance, Sakurai seemed agitated, as if he’d just ran a mile. His silence fed on everyone’s petrified looks, like prey about to be feasted on. Everything else felt miniscule, and they all waited for him to take his victim.

 

“Does anyone care to explain the email I’ve just been sent?” Sakurai regained his composure before taking word, although his eyes said the opposite. “Or should I paraphrase it for all of you?”

 

Sakurai unfolded a paper of little content, but enough to have startled him out of his office. “It would look like I’ve received a response for a contract from the Jensen Association, but instead I have to read the words ‘cease’ and ‘terminate’ in what seems to be the most brief and insulting letter I’ve been addressed to as director of this office. It is utter insolence.” Sakurai set the paper aside with little delicacy, tiring himself of its content and returning to the silence of the room. “I will not tolerate such ignorance to be practiced under my supervision. Now… Don’t make this any more complicated. I want to know, whoever was in charge of managing this project, to tell me what in their damn mind was so much important to have neglected this client.”

 

Looks were shot across the room, none of them pointing at anyone or saying anything, as if they’ve all proven themselves strangers on the case.

 

“Is that it?” He asked, and after a lack of response, Sakurai sighed disappointedly. “If no one comes forward at this exact moment, I’m afraid you would only regret it later.” He threatened, if only decreasing the chance of any one of them to step up. “Then… I don’t suppose I would have to investigate myself who sent those emails?” He tried again and soon realized his patience was being tested. “So, it is no one?” Sakurai fumed. “I’ll have you all know that if I have to repeat myself again, I will conduct an inspection right this instant, and no one would be allowed to exit this office until I get my answer. Now…” He waited, observing each lane of desk, watching on their reactions for the most minimal movement until he became tired of being played with. “Speak up!” He yelled, shaking the room as if a thunder had stroke.

 

It was not until then that Aiba held his breath, and stood up from his desk, bracing himself for the worst. When Sakurai’s cold eyes lay on him, it paralyzed Masaki, making him forget how to use his voice.

 

“S-Sir,” Aiba managed to utter as the blood pounded against his ears. “I-I did… I sent them.”

 

The expression in Sakurai had transformed into something Aiba couldn’t read at all, undergoing a transition as if his patience had been completely spent. Behind him, the secretary was about to alert the director of something before being completely ignored.

 

“Why?” There was difficulty in his voice.

 

Masaki swallowed. “I-I was appointed to send the emails to the production department for them to carry out.”

 

“And? Once they carried it out, did it occur to you to verify their status after, or did you send a response to the client about it? Did it even occur to you to assign a next meeting for the consultation of the pitch or at least a reminder to make sure they were still satisfied with our service?”

 

“I’m afraid I didn’t, sir.” Masaki’s eyes could only meet the floor, afraid his words would trigger anything worse. The only time he dared to raise his sight, he encountered what he mostly feared in Sakurai’s eyes, burning as he’d never felt them on himself in all of his career. It was a look he could only describe as disappointment.

 

“And why is it that this task was so impossible for you to complete?”

 

“I…” Aiba paused, torn between the truth and a lie. His eyes turned to look for Ikuta whom avoided his gaze most of all. Still, he’d already had made a decision. “I forgot.”

 

“You forgot?” Sakurai repeated, taken aback by his response.

 

“I have no other excuse, sir.”

 

“It is not an excuse I’m asking for, but an explanation.”

 

Aiba inhaled to compose his nerves. “I have none, sir.”

 

Sakurai breathed out exasperated. “I don’t believe this is your response to me of ‘taking responsibility’, is it? Because… if it were the case, I wouldn’t be able to describe how much you’ve deceived me.” He came closer to Aiba’s desk. “And I don’t suppose… you would make me think I did wrong in estimating you... although you are not the most punctual when you are required to. You speak out of place… and demand certain things you can’t even return. How do you expect to take responsibility of others when you won’t even fulfill your own? Tell me,” His words came slowly along with his steps, until they halted merely a meter away from Aiba. At his proximity, Aiba’s heart felt like bursting, unable to move under the director’s gaze. And he leaned it just a little closer to make sure his words would reach him. “What good is someone who can’t even keep his word?”

 

Jun took a stand at once, before Sakurai would say another word. “Sir, I’m afraid there might be a mistake,” Jun argued collected and steady. “Aiba was never in charge of such project. He had only but one client and their contract signing already took place. Their pitch was already done. Their client was more than pleased! This couldn’t possibly be his fault-”

 

“I don’t think I remember asking for your interference.” Sakurai interjected, addressing Jun. “What makes you think I would want your opinion? I’ll have you know, you are in no position to make claims considering you’ve taken more than enough liberty of your own. If you think you may have passed unnoticed, you are wrong. Your numbers are red enough, Matsumoto. Believe me… you don’t want to provoke me.”

 

Jun struggled to hold himself back. His knuckles turned red from the strength he repressed, and he hid his infuriation in a sharp exhale. He never turned away from Sakurai as the other returned an equally threatening gaze. Eventually, Sakurai’s silence forced him to resign, cursing to himself of how weak his emotions had made him.

 

The moment Sakurai returned to Aiba, the latter flinched by just the feeling of his gaze falling on him once again. His breath held tight, stiffening, wishing only he could close his eyes to lessen the sting his words would land on him next. The more it delayed, the more his heart ran. If he would only get it over with, but it seemed that even the position he’d manage to make Aiba assume pleased him more than taking the final strike. And Aiba felt it would never end, no matter how much he wanted it to, no matter how much it hurt. After all, he was afraid.

 

Finally, as a sign of indifference, Sakurai sighed exhaustedly. “This is a waste of my time,” He moved away quickly, out the office and towards the elevators. The secretary rushed to his side after alerting everyone to get back to work. Not a second later, both had disappeared almost as suddenly as they had come, leaving behind a clouding apprehension that forbid any space for word or movement.

 

~

 

The moment Masaki left his chair, Jun’s gaze followed him all the way through the office. Walking across the room, avoiding contact with everyone, and heading straight to the emergency stair case. The instant the door closed behind him, Jun followed. He opened the heavy door carefully as to not make a sound and followed the echoes of Masaki’s descending steps. He leaned out the spiral staircase, catching but a glimpse of the older as he’d found his way through another floor. When the door closed, Jun hurried down, following the steps Masaki left behind.

 

If he remembered well, the door Masaki had chosen was an abandoned floor. It remained under construction for several months before its preparations were suddenly interrupted. There was still furniture that’d been placed there, along with pieces of wood and gear that’d only helped to pile dust with time. Although the area was restricted, no one would care to secure the way in because there was nothing to find there. Overall, the floor was always empty.

 

Walking pass the clutter, Jun only had to follow the light sound of a sob emerging down the hall. He walked carefully to not startle Aiba and found him at a turn. Alone and by a bench in which seemed like a waiting area, Aiba hid. His crying was but a murmur.

 

When Masaki perceived a presence behind him, he held his breath, turning with surprise, finding Jun firmly fixed on him.

 

“Jun…” Aiba tried to speak as collectively as he could, hiding the tears he dried from his face with a handkerchief that seemed to catch Jun’s attention. “W-What are you doing here?”

 

Jun didn’t respond and approached him instead, taking a place by Masaki’s side as his gaze never left the older. It was impossible to hide his reddened eyes from Jun now. The more the younger stared with an evident hurt, the more Masaki’s eyes watered again. Immediately, he gave in on pretending.

 

Masaki sobbed into the handkerchief for long minutes, overpowered by the still throbbing shock. He was unable to utter a word as he humiliated himself in front of Jun, although a much greater humiliation had already been done. Jun didn’t dare give a word or a touch, unaware if the other would accept it. He hoped, still, that his company was enough to hearten the other. He remained quiet, waiting until Masaki’s voice would come again. In the meantime, he felt useless. Regretting every word he had said and what he hadn’t. But there was no use on giving or taking blame. The wound was done.

 

Aiba sniffed a last time before regaining composure. Having dried enough tears, he found the strength to direct himself to Jun, but he found he had no courage to address what had happened, for it would only trigger his anguish again.

 

“I was meaning… to return it to you,” Masaki spoke of the handkerchief instead, allowing Jun to confirm his initial assumption that he had kept it all this time. “I guess… I just ruined it again. Stupid…”

 

Jun didn’t reply and remained patient for him to speak. But there was still an uneasiness to Aiba’s words that would only make his lower lip tremble again.

 

“You shouldn’t have done it…” Masaki’s voice shook. “… It was wrong to talk back at him-”

 

“I wanted to.” Jun answered.

 

“It was wrong… It was my mistake… you should have stayed out of it. You knew you would only get in trouble, so why… why did you-”

 

“Aiba…” Jun’s voice called him softly, and after the older denied looking at him, Jun’s hand lifted Masaki’s face gently, taking Masaki in his gaze. Masaki’s teary eyes stared back at him, reflecting that same frightened feeling Sakurai had provoked in them. It broke Jun’s heart to feel his body so shaken. “There is nothing I wouldn’t have done for you,” Jun’s thumb wiped away Masaki’s streaming tears, ceasing his quivering and calming his body. “You don’t need to hide from me.” Jun said, kindly and tenderly, before leaning in and stealing his lips in a kiss.

 

Masaki had barely come to his senses in feeling Jun so close and perceiving the sensation of his lips brushing against his own. Perhaps it was the suddenness of his act that had paralyzed Aiba from responding, unable to take in his touch. His mind traveled back and forth, wishing he could stop thinking completely, wanting to give in, close his eyes and lose himself in Jun’s affection. But deep down, something warned him, a confusion that brought new tears into Masaki’s eyes as he fought the urge. And he knew he would never forgive himself for it.

 

“Jun…” Masaki slightly pulled back before the other was searching for his lips again, asking for his taste once more. Masaki repeated his name, obstructed by a kiss that soon became demanding the more Masaki called him breathlessly. Eventually, Aiba found the strength to push him away, as it was the only way he would allow him to regain himself. Jun was immediately puzzled with Aiba’s response, beginning to wonder if he’d done something wrong.

 

Aiba’s eyes looked everywhere except at Jun, who waited for an answer to his open confession, but was unable to read it in Aiba’s actions.

 

Masaki hesitated, afraid he’d lost his words, his throat becoming dry once again. “I-I’m… sorry.” It was all he could utter, unable to stop the tears that pooled under his eyes. When his gaze finally raised to meet with Jun’s again it was already too late. “I’m so sorry,” Aiba got up at once and walked away as quickly as he possibly could towards the emergency staircase. Jun made no effort to follow him this time. He’d lost all ability to do so. Left with an answer that had made him feel most neglected, he heard the door shut down the hall.

 

~

 

When Nino raised his sight to greet the next costumer in line and found Aiba in a state of devastation, his reaction was immediate. Ninomiya abandoned the bar and without prior question, he rushed to find a private place for the two of them. Luckily the terrace of the company was empty of prying eyes and it offered Aiba a change of scenery to take a break from a most agitating day. After the older had explained between sobs and tears, it seemed like his crying had been expended for the day. They both sat in silence watching as the sun settled down along with them.

 

“This is it, isn’t it?” Nino suddenly asked. “If you go back in there, you’ll get fired?”

 

 “Tomorrow,” Aiba stared distractedly at his feet. “In the morning, for sure…”

 

“Why wait for tomorrow if he can just get it over with now? He wouldn’t even have to deal with seeing you another day.”

 

“It’s always in the morning,” Aiba added. “He likes to see if we would even bother to come in. Besides, it would give us a lot more trouble going through all the effort to arrive in the first place.”

 

Nino scoffed, admitting he was surprised just how far that man would go. At least Aiba’s dismissal would mean he no longer had to deal with the likes of Sakurai ever again.

 

Nino looked at his friend. Aiba had no desire, or even the courage to go back inside, but there was still a lot more he wondered of what he’d told him, and most was left unclear.

 

“What are you going to do now?”

 

Aiba sighed. “I’m not sure… If I don’t pay rent in the next few months, I guess I’ll have to go back to my parents’.”

 

“Is it really necessary? You know there is enough space at my place,”

 

“I wouldn’t stand bothering you, Nino. You know that…” Aiba argued. Nonetheless, the barista had all the reasons to fight him, but he knew it was not the right time to try and change his mind.

 

“Then… you’re actually leaving?” Nino asked in a last effort. Masaki’s response was hidden in a sympathetic smile that gradually turned gloom. “Why couldn’t you just blame that other guy? He deserved it anyway.” Nino disputed.

 

“And make Sakurai fire him instead? Is that what you really think I should have done?” Aiba shook his head. “Ikuta would’ve hated me for life, not to mention everyone else would start to spread rumors of me again, saying I’m fawning on the director. I knew he wasn’t going to come forward. I had to do something. Besides… Sakurai threatened us with an email inspection. If they were to find those emails from Anon… who knows what other trouble I would have gotten into.”

 

“So, in the end… you were just protecting _him_?” Ninomiya asked. When Masaki didn’t give him an answer, he understood.

 

Both stared at the view of the dim lit city. A cold air began to blow but neither of them complained, wishing those minutes would only last a little longer.

 

“I can’t believe you ran away. From Jun, I mean,” Nino commented. “It couldn’t be more obvious now that you know he is Anon. But… I’m still confused as of why you chose to reject him. Was it not what you wanted?”

 

“It’s not him.” Aiba said, gaining a frown from Ninomiya. “It’s not Jun.”

 

“You’re sure about that?” Nino was unconvinced.

 

Aiba nodded slowly, not a doubt in his mind. “It is not the same… the way he kissed me. It wasn’t like Anon. It was… so much different. Like it had a whole different meaning. Like a new flavor. I could never mix the two. The way _he_ held me… and what _he_ wanted when _he_ did it, it meant so much more… It was not him. He felt nothing like Anon.”

 

“… What?”

 

Aiba was about to explain when he found the other staring at him with great perplexity. Aiba had not caught up to his reaction before he realized what he’d said himself, gasping and quickly covering his mouth, too late to take back what he’d said.

 

Ninomiya’s expression transformed into disbelief, seeing the state of the other. “No…” Nino denied. “Aiba… you didn’t,”

 

There was no use in lying. Aiba fell into admittance, his face hiding in his hand.

 

“Aiba, you didn’t!” Nino exclaimed.

 

“I’m sorry! I really am! Please don’t freak out-”

 

“Are you insane!? Freak out is an understatement! What the hell were you thinking!?” Nino’s voice rose again.

 

“Please, Nino! You promised! You said you would understand!” Aiba begged, trying to make the other’s agitation wind down.

 

Nino was about to say something before Masaki attacked him with a pleading look making him realize the things he’d say before and which he intended to keep no matter what. With great indignation, he let it go and allowed Aiba to explain.

 

“It was with my total consent, I swear! It was all my crazy idea! It’s just that… he’d paid for this amazing dinner and I... And I asked to meet him, I really tried, but he wouldn’t let me unless… I closed my eyes. Next thing I know it just… happened! And… I let him.” Aiba sighed. “What else can I say?”

 

Nino said nothing, reducing himself to accept all Aiba told him and holding back all the thoughts that came through his head. He looked at Aiba with a defeated look. “What am I going to do with you?”

 

“Bear with me a little more. I promise it won’t be long.”

 

“How much long are we talking about?”

 

Aiba thought for a second before he’d made up his mind. “If it’s not now… it’s over.”

 

~

_‘Is this silence because of me?’_

_‘Because I startled you that time at  
my apartment?’_

_‘If it is… I owe you an apology.’_

_‘I shouldn’t have cornered you as I did. I realize_  
now I pushed too far. You were only trying to help me   
but I took advantage of your kindness in the meanest way.   
I’m sorry…’  

 _‘Regardless of what you may think, I’m not mad at you._  
 Or at least I know I don’t want to be, because it would   
mean I would lose you. And I don’t want you to turn   
away from me as well.’

_‘There are not enough words to express what I’ve felt today…  
 and I don’t know who to turn to now.’_

_‘I need you more than ever, Anon.’_

_‘Please…’_

_‘Are you sure it’s me who you need?’_

_‘You’re the only Anon I know.’_

_‘You might be confusing me with someone  
else then.’_

_‘Someone else?’_

_‘What do you mean? I don’t understand.’_

_‘But you’re right. It’s my fault. You wouldn’t know  
the difference anyway.’_

_‘What is going on?’_

_‘I’ve asked you once and you admitted it before,  
so I shouldn’t be surprised now.’_

_‘Although, I can’t say I didn’t feel anything at all._  
 Rather… you texting me just now is only making   
it harder on me not to think about it.’

 _‘But what is there to think about if I’d always noticed_  
and I didn’t do a damn thing. Maybe it was me who   
was wrong.’

_‘I was only in the way.’_

_‘Anon, are you okay?’_

_‘To be honest, I don’t know what I am to you  
anymore.’_

_‘What happened?’_

_‘Tell me, please. I want to understand you.’_

_‘I don’t know how.’_

_‘I’ve ran out of ideas and this has always  
been a bad one to begin with.’_

_‘Anon…’_

_‘I don’t know what to say…’_

_‘I’m mad.’_

_‘Furious. At myself, most of all.’_

_‘…’_

_‘Why did you say you liked me? You didn’t mean it,  
didn’t you?’_

_‘Why would you lie that way? When you can’t even  
tell the difference.’_

_‘Difference? Of what?’_

_‘Of me.’_

_‘Of what you wanted so much to know.’_

_‘When you kissed me, were you thinking of me at all?’_

_‘What are you saying? Who else would I be thinking of?’_

_‘You should know.’_

_‘You seem to have quite a lead on it, don’t you?’_

_‘You saw…’_

_‘Jun and I?’_

_‘...’_

_‘You were there?’_

_‘But we were alone…’_

_‘Anon you followed us?’_

_‘You spied on us?’_

_‘Is that what matters to you the most?’_

_‘It matters to me if I ever made you think that I  
wanted you to be following me.’_

_‘I get it. Because you have your own things to hide, no?’_

_‘Because I thought I could trust you.’_

_‘You’re right. I’m the only one wrong here._  
And the moment I turn around from you, you   
already forgot about me.’

_‘You’re wrong, Anon.’_

_‘I didn’t ask for Jun to kiss me.’_

_‘But that wasn’t enough to make you complain, was it?’_

_‘All those times you ran along with him… is that what  
you were doing? Is that why he never leaves your side?’_

_‘You’re taking this out of context.  
We are not together!’_

_‘He doesn’t deprive you from anything physical,  
so it’s easier, no?’_

_‘Anon, please stop! You’re misunderstanding everything! I_  
 get you’re upset, but that doesn’t give you   
any right to accuse me this way.’

 _‘Jun is my friend, nothing more! He came to my side because_  
I was hurt, because he cared about me and wanted to console me.   
It is not my fault that you didn’t get there any sooner   
and didn’t console me yourself.’

 _‘Hell, if I ever knew that getting myself into such a_  
humiliating position would make you come around to help me,  
 I wouldn’t have asked to meet you at all. I was crushed,   
Anon, why can’t you understand that? I only needed a friend   
to tell me I was going to be okay, to make me forget   
of what had happened. And I wish it would have been you…   
Gosh you don’t know how much I wish you would   
have helped me. But you didn’t.’

 _‘You took your time and you hid and you coward away only_  
to come back and accuse me of betraying you? Where were you?  
 When I had to stand there and take those insults on my own?   
What was so much important that you had to hide from me again?’

_‘You thought I was him.’_

_‘And if I did?’_

_‘Was I not allowed to? Was that another one of your conditions?_  
You didn’t really give me much of a choice,   
when all I can do is guess about you.’

 _‘Because only you can have me, and only you can follow me around_  
and know where I go or who I talk to or when I get in trouble.   
Because only you can kiss me, right?’

_‘And only you can have secrets.’_

_‘What position are you to be so envious, when you_  
didn’t even want me to find you in the first place? How can  
 you say those things when everything I’ve ever done was   
trust you? When you don’t even let me understand you   
and all you’ve ever done is make yourself invisible?’  

_‘It gives you no right, Anon.’_

_‘You don’t possess me.’_

_‘I was right after all. You didn’t like me. You said it_  
 yourself, it was only but the thought of me what  
 you liked.’

_‘Even when it was just the thought of you,  
that was all you ever gave me.’_

_‘You’re going to deny me that too?’_

_‘…’_

_‘I rejected him.’_

_‘Because of you… I broke my friend’s heart.’_

_‘Is that really not enough for you?’_

_‘…’_

_‘How much longer were you expecting me to keep  
 waiting for you?’_

_‘Be honest.’_

_‘I told you, I was not ready.’_

_‘I don’t think there’s such a thing as being ready.  
What you really need is to be brave.’_

_‘Have you tried that in the least?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Then… I’m sorry I’ve made you so weak.’_

_‘I can’t do this anymore.’_

_‘Masaki, wait.’_

_‘And if it is you that is holding me back,  
 what am I supposed to do?’_

_‘If it’s you I don’t want to hurt?’_

_‘Tell me, what should I do?’_

_‘Masaki…’_

_‘…’_

_‘Please, answer.’_

_‘Please…’_

 

That night, Aiba silenced the chat with Anon, ceasing the reception of notifications even as the latter kept texting him. It was the closest alternative he’d found besides blocking Anon’s number or deleting his contacts.

 

~

 

Aiba never thought he would see a day he’d regret waking up to this much. It was bad enough that he had to follow his morning routine before work just to expect his dismissal noticed on top of his desk when he arrived. Yet halfway through getting ready Aiba couldn’t help but wonder what it would finally be like to free himself of that very suffocating office. Soon enough, a new feeling took over him.

 

By the end of the day, he would be released of all he’d once come to detest. No more being late or sending emails or redacting papers or filing or directors. That thought alone helped Aiba get through his morning preparations and on his way to work, he was guided by a feeling that maybe things weren’t going to be as terrible after all.

 

It seemed like any other ordinary day when he arrived at the company, entering the building as if it were the last time he would perceive himself as if he was part of it. It was a sensation much like the first time he’d come there for his job interview. That day he’d thought he would never walk through those doors again, yet there he was 5 years later, a professional. After all, it didn’t seem like he’d done so bad.

 

The office was not much different from that first day of work either. Most of the people he’d started with where also still there, some had come and gone over the years, but it wasn’t until Kazama’s dismissal that he’d felt on a brink after such a long time. He wondered if it would sadden his friend to know he would be joining him soon­­­—or at least, sooner than expected.

 

His floor was rather silent that morning, as if this day were to be the kind that passed slowly. There was no sign of the director or the secretary (or Jun) anywhere near, so he was more than confident to walk to his desk, ready to face whatever waited for him there. It was much to his confusion when he found his things intact. There was no folded paper laying on his keyboard or sitting on his chair. He thought it strange but perhaps the director had not come in yet that morning to deliver it to him himself.

 

He sat down and made himself busy, but this time he thought of the things he would leave unfinished, possibly to be assigned to someone else. He hoped at least that it would hearten them to know all the hard work had already been done.

 

Masaki felt the chair next to him being pulled out, becoming paralyzed when he felt Jun right next to him. This would be the usual time when he would share his “good morning” with him, but he doubted Jun would even want to hear from him today. The younger sat quietly as to not bring himself any attention, avoiding any sort of contact with the one to his side.

 

 _He is angry_ , Aiba thought and suddenly remembered it was not going to be an easy day after all. His silence was unbearable, the awkwardness between them even worse. It was of no help when he couldn’t even escape from him by using his phone, since it had been turned off upon his arrival to the office to drive away distractions. He wondered if he would ever be able to feel calm again, but he was proven wrong yet again when the director presented himself in the room.

 

Sakurai and Ohno walked through the office, ignoring everyone’s greetings, as they accustomed to each morning, and locking themselves away in Sakurai’s office without further ado. Masaki wondered if the next time they came out they would be making a stop at his desk. The thought alone made him anxious and trying to focus on anything else was not going to be an easy task. Not even half an hour into his day, Aiba already wanted to go home.

 

~

 

“May I have a word with you?” The time had come for Ohno to call him. It was much later than expected, considering it was almost noon and he hadn’t heard a single word from the director, but now, he thought, they’d finally made up their mind to end his torture.

 

Aiba obeyed and followed Ohno through the office to the end of the hall, the eyes beginning to weight on him. Ohno showed him through the door to the director’s office before he quickly shut it behind them. Aiba stood in the middle of the room in silence. Yet again this time, the office was empty.

 

“I hope it’s not too sudden, but I needed to speak with you in private,” Ohno began. “It’s about what happened yesterday,” Aiba expected no less although it was unknown to him why Ohno would address him in Sakurai’s stead. “It should be no news to you how angry the director was with all of this, but I don’t know if his shock will be greater to know that you’d lied to him. Would you explain to me what happened?”

 

Aiba was unarmed, looking at the other with great surprise, expecting him to be the last to have seen through him. “You knew…?”

 

“Aiba, I’m the one in charge of assigning all those projects. What makes you think I wouldn’t have known?”

 

Aiba bowed his head slightly. “I’m sorry…”

 

“Did Ikuta ask for you to take care of it? Is that why you didn’t want to tell the director?”

 

“I… didn’t wanted it to seem as if I were attacking Ikuta.”

 

Ohno sighed. “I understand your concern, but it was very unprofessional to take another’s blame like that. You should have said something sooner.”

 

“Then, I should have blamed Ikuta after all, since he was not going to come forward? I should have accused him first, was that the right thing to do? I was still going to get blamed once they’ve found I took care of that work.”

 

“At some range, since it was not your responsibility to carry out in the first place. In any case, it would still be wrong that you would keep his guilt quiet. Don’t you understand the degree of all this? The director is furious! You’re making it hard on me to understand why you would even go through that trouble. And I’m surprised to find you don’t have much of a reason either.”

 

“You’re saying it’ll be worse?” asked Aiba. “Because I lied to him and took credit for that work?”

 

“That would be up for the director to decide.”

 

“So, I might get fired after all…” Aiba said in a lower tone.

 

Ohno got closer to the younger in perceiving his grief. “I can’t say anything definite but… the director is terribly busy right now. If anything, it won’t be today.” His words made Masaki raise his sight once again. “The way you handled everything on your own was still wrong, hence a penalty might not be unusual. But I won’t speak for Sakurai. This is only but a warning from me. In the meantime, I advise you to focus on your _own_ pending matters. Is that understood?”

 

Aiba nodded and bowed to the secretary with his approval. After the warning had already been given, Ohno invited Aiba to go back to his desk, but he didn’t go before asking Ohno a last question.

 

“Will you tell him the truth after all?”

 

“What good will it do if I don’t?” Ohno responded.

 

Aiba understood and returned to work. Ohno’s last words echoed in Masaki’s conscience longer than expected. If only Anon would hear them, maybe he would have a reason to not give up on him entirely.

 

~

 

Aiba went straight home after work that day. Nino had already warned he would be busy that night so Aiba had no reason to wander around without a good excuse. He ate, bathed, and drank before deciding to sit on his bed. Sleep had yet to kick in when he decided to take his phone and play with it for a while. Inevitably, his attention was fixed on the chat titled Anonymous. Anon’s last messages were still without a response, laying on the bottom of the screen.

 

He scrolled up through the conversation that had developed into their fight. He didn’t know what to think of it still. Why had Anon turned on him such way? It was rude, aggressive, and unmediated. Almost like a whole different person. Someone who was far from the kind, gentle and caring Anon whom Aiba had allowed to kiss him.

 

To scroll away from it, Aiba found an item that he’d never considered to be of much importance until that moment. With a single tap, his phone displayed the contact’s information, in which this case had nothing more than Anon’s phone number. Just another odd combination and codes that didn’t particularly say anything.

 

Nino was fast to predict Jun couldn’t have been Anon after he gave Aiba his phone number, but the possibility of Anon’s insistence and premeditations was a reality Aiba did not want to dispose right away. Such a significant thing made him acknowledge that which he’d overseen. It was an incredible lead he’d kept right from the start. The first thing Anon ever gave him and he only but used half of its purpose. He wondered if it would be of some use now.

 

He pondered on it, trying to think of a reason to take the risk, but it was the last thing he had, the only alternative he could rely on now. If this didn’t work, he would accept he had lost him. If not… then there was only one way of knowing.

 

Masaki dialed the number on his screen and pressed the phone to his ear hesitantly. His heart beat raced when the ringing went off, each time almost taking longer than the last. It rang, and kept ringing, Masaki had forgotten to count how many times. When it came to a stop, Masaki froze, trying to come up with his first words before he realized the call had been missed.

 

He exhaled, as if he’d been holding his breath all that time. His heart still didn’t seem to calm down. But he was not going to leave things this way. Masaki dialed the number one more time. This time, he took a sharp exhale before pressing it to his ear, the ringing already going off. It rang and rang and rang and stopped.

 

Masaki signed completely defeated. At least now he had a clear answer. He was about to set his phone down when he noticed the timer on his phone screen counting seconds. The call had gone through. Suddenly he panicked before putting the phone to his ear again and listening closely for any sudden sounds.

 

“A-Anon?” Masaki called out through the line. There was a deep silence from the other side, but he was almost certain it was not empty. “Can you hear me? … Can I know if you’re there?” Masaki asked.

 

His request was soon granted when he heard the dialing of a single number as a response. _He_ was there.

 

“I didn’t think you would answer. I… didn’t know how else to approach you.” The silence from the other gave way for Masaki to speak uninterruptedly, which was exactly all he asked from _him_. “I’m sorry I ignored you. I couldn’t bare… what you said to me. That was not you. I refuse to think so… I just wanted you to realize that.”

 

“It hasn’t been long since then, but… it’s almost as if I’ve forgot what it was like to have a normal day when I didn’t have to text you. And… it’s been the longest day…” Masaki’s voice cut off, preventing his voice from breaking so soon into their talk. He still had so much to say. “I’m afraid…” He sobbed. “I don’t want to be lied to. And even less by you. I want to… talk to you again… without a worry… ask you stupid questions… listen to you all night… forget to sleep. I want you to make me laugh again… if just… … If I would know how to convince you… If I could say that I like you… without a doubt… maybe… Would you let me know?”

 

Tears burned in his cheeks the longer the silence continued through the line. “You won’t say anything?... You would make me believe I’m crazy, again? You will hide… always? Is that what you’ve decided? Then… If it is what you want… I’ve also made my decision… to give you a last chance.”

 

Masaki dried his tears, composing his voice to make himself clear. “I want to meet with you… tomorrow at the terrace after office hours. I’ll wait there all night if I must, so you will have no excuse. You will either stop running away and come and meet me or… you will stay as you are and you would have lost me as a friend as well. You have nothing to lose. After tomorrow… I won’t try to look for you again. After that… it’s over. But if I see you there… I will give you an answer to which you’ve been asking to hear for so long. And I will know… if it was truly worth the trouble loving you. That is all I ever wanted to know.”

 

“Would you let me know… that you at least understand what I’m trying to do?” Masaki gave way for his answer. _His_ pause took longer than expected, but the sound of a dial still came. “Then… I will expect your answer tomorrow if I see you there. Until then… and if you decide not to… I will it say it now… Good bye, Anon.”

 

Masaki hung up immediately and he could breathe again, the tears that he’d been hanging on to already subsided. He placed his phone down and laid on his bed soon to be taken by sleep after all his energy had been spent. He hoped the other had listened to him until the very end.

 

~

 

It was only a couple of minutes past noon and Aiba decided to spend his lunch break sitting across Nino at a table at the café. Neither of them did much lunching. Aiba was too worried time would fly if he didn’t stare at his watch and Nino only observed him with concern.

 

“You’re nervous,” said Nino. “And very anxious. You need to take it easy on yourself. There’s still half a day to go through.”

 

“Then I’ll be anxious for another half day.” Aiba answered, constantly reviving his phone screen to look at the time when a minute had barely past since the last time he checked.

 

“You really think he’ll show up?”

 

“I don’t know… But what was I supposed to do?” Aiba fixed on Nino.

 

“I wouldn’t have called him to start with. If you knew you wouldn’t get an answer out of him, why did you bother to insist? It’s just…” Nino crossed his arms over his chest, his shoulders slumping with a sign. “Forget about him. He is not worth the trouble, believe me…”

 

“I didn’t expect him to answer me, I wanted him to listen. I wanted him to know this was the last thing I would do for him.”

 

“You’re still insisting. That’s the real problem here. And honestly… I don’t think this guy even wants to be found.”

 

“I didn’t want to leave him like that, Nino. Not when I was so close,”

 

“You can’t treat this like a break up, Aiba. This isn’t one.”

 

“I know…”

 

“Then what gives?” Nino asked exhaustedly. Aiba had no argument to dispute him, but he was not willing to change his mind now. It was too late to convince him otherwise.

 

“I will finish with this tonight,” said Aiba.

 

“And if he tricks you? What if this is just another stupid lie to make a fool out of you?”

 

Masaki wouldn’t have expected to find these kinds of concerns in Ninomiya today. His persistence made it all more difficult for Aiba to understand what Nino was against.

 

“I’m not taking back my word.” Aiba said, finally, but Nino appeared to have lost interest. There was a strange look in his eyes as he refused to look at Aiba. He was not pleased. If anything, Aiba’s words had only stirred his anger. “Nino…?” Aiba called him with worry, trying to look for his gaze with little success. “Are you okay?”

 

Nino inhaled and exhaled vulgarly as he rubbed on his temples. Aiba could barely follow what was going on, but he perceived he was trying to put his best face regardless of all.

 

“How’s Jun?” Nino changed the subject without further comment.

 

Aiba followed, although confused. “Still pretending I don’t exist. I tried speaking with him today. He left his desk right away as if he didn’t hear me. It’s almost like… I can’t recognize him anymore.”

 

“What a jerk…” Nino said under his breath. “He can’t take a single ‘no’.”

 

“What are you saying? He isn’t a jerk,” Aiba argued him. “I was the one who broke his heart. I’m the only bad guy here. I can’t blame him. I would probably hate myself as much too. In fact… I haven’t forgiven myself ever since.” Aiba fell back on his chair with a sigh. “Guess It’ll be a worry less once I’m out of here.” Aiba closed his eyes and he leaned his head back, trying to quiet down the unsettlement in his head. Meanwhile Nino eyed him from across the table painfully, unable to understand what his friend was going through, but having an idea that could compare.

 

When the time came to return to the office, Aiba advised Nino to leave without him that day. He didn’t want to delay him, as he was possibly going to take longer than expected, that is, if everything worked accordingly. Nino listened, and with a last farewell, he returned to work with his head hanging low.

 

The afternoon outside the office windows became dimmer, showing an early night that began to creep in. While most of his colleges had left, Aiba worked for as late as he could. Jun’s desk remained empty by now as he’d gone out early again today and it gave Aiba the opportunity to work more freely, without tension creeping up his back every time he looked Jun’s way.

 

It was becoming late and Aiba accepted he’d delay himself enough, and with great patience, but with an inpatient heart, he put away his things, shut down his desktop and proceeded to the elevator, pressing a floor number far higher than the lobby.

 

The terrace was solitary as he’d imagined. It began to feel chilly outside, so he braced on to his coat and sat by a lone bench that faced the nearest entrance. From there, he watched everyone that came around, people that weren’t from his floor or people he never remembered seeing before. Janitors, groups from all sorts of departments, groups from the higher offices, all came and went to take some fresh air, take a smoke or chat. None of them catching Aiba’s attention.

 

Masaki had to switch sides of his bench, making his back face the entrance to lessen the distant chatter that’d began to annoy him. He couldn’t bare listen to anyone right now. He’d only wanted time to pass quickly so he could get his answer, but considering it was only growing colder the darker it got, he admitted having made a mistake to agree to stay there all night.

 

~

 

It was only but a glimpse of a starry night sky he saw before he felt a first drop of rain fall on his head. When it began to increase, he hid away his phone into his pocket, refusing to leave his spot. It didn’t rain heavily, only but a drizzle. He didn’t mind his hair getting wet and continued to look out at the night view. It was a sight that only made him fall in love with that city all over again, reminding him of why he’d decided to come there in the first place.

 

He wondered what his past self would think of him now, doing something so stupid as to give his complete trust in someone that did nothing but let him down yet and yet again. But he didn’t want to despair, not even after 2 hours had passed without a sign of anyone coming his way. He regretted to not tell _him_ to let him know if he would be waiting in vain after all. Yet _his_ not mentioning anything must have been a good sign.

 

When the rain quieted down, he returned to take out his phone. His fingers felt the device before opening _their_ chat. He’d read amusedly, trying to remember what he was thinking of when he came up with the ridiculous questions he’d made _him_ answer. Soon, he was entertained with the thought of asking him more. New questions he wished he would’ve come up with sooner. Better questions, longer ones. If only he would receive a new message from _him_. Like the kind _he_ wrote when _he_ was bored and wanted to waste time with Masaki. The type that would never fail to make Masaki smile to himself and would let him imagine _his_ voice speaking to him directly.

 

He realized he missed that voice, even when it told him lies, or made fun of him, he still missed it more than anything. He couldn’t bare but let it end as if it all had been worthless, because he still believed it wasn’t.

 

He didn’t mistake it, the moment he heard the door behind him open. There was no one else there to come, it had been emptied hours ago. Still he refused to think whoever it was were coming his direction. He kept facing away from the door, deciding to ignore his panic, and brushing it off as an overreaction. Not even when he heard a pair of footsteps approaching, becoming louder against the wet floor.

 

This time, his attention fixed on it, on _his_ steps that were still too far for him to dare look back and he cursed himself. He damned himself for being the weak one this time, for feeling his legs shaking at that moment, for not feeling able to stand and look. Even though _he_ was there. Even though _he_ waited for him to.

 

His heart pounded against his chest hurtfully, it was telling him it was his turn. He wanted it to quiet down, but its agitation persisted. Aiba didn’t know what to do next as he hadn’t thought this far ahead. And he started feeling sick. Sick of himself, sick of his hesitations, sick of his excuses. With a sharp intake of air, Masaki got on his feet and looked at the door towards the figure that stood behind him.

 

Even under the dim light of their surroundings, it was a figure he couldn’t mistake for anyone else. So much he’d seen it, it was engraved in his mind to all its extent. And Masaki felt his heart stop.

 

Masaki’s look transformed right before _his_ eyes, from confusion, to recognition, to denial. _He_ saw it all in Masaki, and _he_ expected no less.

 

Masaki’s mouth opened, about to voice the million thoughts crossing his mind at once when he noticed the redness in the other’s eyes and the stream of tears he could see from a mile away. And Masaki’s confusion returned, leaving him agape, without explanations. It made no sense. It gave him no answer. He must have been wrong.

 

“Nino…?” Masaki called as the other made no effort to answer. His eyes kept tearing the more he stared at the older. “What are you doing here?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 8 ends with a shocking reveal! What does this mean with what we've seen so far? Will this be the last we hear of Anon? This could mean a big confession next chapter. I'll see you then! Thanks for reading~!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 9 is here. A very special thanks to my friend Dhay for her help ^^ Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks! I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 

 

“Let’s go home.” Nino half commanded, half begged.

 

“Nino… what are you doing here?”

 

“Let’s go home-”

 

“Not until you explain what is going on,” Aiba interjected, before fear took him and his voice quivered. The younger refused to answer as more tears pooled under his eyes. Aiba was incapable of interpreting what they meant. “Nino…?” He couldn’t help but insist, yet Nino couldn’t force himself to think of an excuse.

 

“Please…” Nino’s eyes pleaded as well, unable to repeat himself without his voice cutting. He appeared weak, vulnerable even, and just the thought of it broke Aiba’s heart, but it hurt him even more that he had no other choice than to listen to Nino.

 

When Masaki gave in, Nino walked quickly towards him, closing their distance to pull Masaki away with him. Masaki let himself be led by the other while attempting to keep up with his pace, exiting the terrace and entering the elevator.

 

All the way down, Nino’s grip on Aiba’s wrist never loosened, as to not let him escape. Aiba was about to protest the strength Nino used on him, but there was something about the younger’s silence that took away Aiba’s will to make a sound.

 

The ride down became eternal and Aiba’s eyes never left Ninomiya, asking himself why. Trying to imagine him at the other side of that phone and finding no possible answer. He had to be wrong. He must be joking…

 

When the elevator finally stopped at the lobby, Nino pulled him once again to the exit of the company building, proceeding to call a taxi that took them home.

 

~

 

Once they arrived at Aiba’s apartment, Ninomiya ordered Aiba to take a bath. He must have noticed Aiba clothes were still wet and Aiba understood he was only looking out for him, but it bothered Aiba that Nino were only delaying things more. Ninomiya insisted. He was mad. He would have it no other way, so Aiba had no choice but to follow.

 

When he finished with his bath, Aiba’s apartment seemed empty again. Aiba called Nino’s name twice, but his friend wasn’t sitting on his sofa nor in his kitchen, searching his fridge for beer as he accustomed to. It wasn’t until he considered his bedroom that he found a lump laying on a corner of his bed, half asleep while he waited for Aiba to come out of his bath.

 

Aiba’s gaze fixed on him, unable to say a word about what he observed from Nino. It was impossible trying to take in what it all meant and even worse was the feeling of realizing he didn’t know what to do next. When he once felt so sure…

 

Aiba sat on his bed to dry his hair. By the other’s stillness he guessed he didn’t want to talk after all, but he was proven wrong when he heard the sudden awakening of the younger’s voice.

 

“I’m not him,”

 

His words came unexpectedly, bringing Aiba’s thoughts to a halt. “…What?”

 

“I’m not him,” Nino repeated, this time his voice came across clearly. “No matter how much I would’ve wanted to be...”

 

Aiba’s bewilderment took away his words.

 

“Masaki…?” Ninomiya sat up on the bed, refusing to face Aiba and giving him his back instead. “Do you remember that first time I met you?” Nino began.

 

“If I'm not wrong, it must have been spring. The weather was irritating. I woke up with allergies and I didn't want to go to work that morning, but I still came in thinking I needed to get my paycheck. It was the day of the interviews and I saw you early noon, sitting at a table at the café. Your hair was freakishly long, your tie had an odd knot and your interview clothes looked like they've seen better days, but you still managed to pull off the look somehow. You brought in a bento that came with a small hand-written note you placed right next to your drink. It looked like you had a rough time at the interview, but that note was enough to get a smile out of you.”

 

“I was cleaning the table near yours when I caught a glimpse of your phone. You were playing those funny animal videos as if to cheer yourself up. I found it so dumb and childish I laughed to myself. When you spilled your water and I rushed to clean it up, you refused my help and said you would clean the mess yourself even though it was my job. After I handed you a new napkin, I went back to the bar and came back to place a cup of coffee on your table and say it was on the house. I thought it would be the last time I would see you, so I thought I could spare some of my tipping money with you. But then you came back to the café… A month had passed. Your hair was cut, your tie straight, your suit was a proper shade of black and your shoes were polished. You made the line that day just so you could find me in the register and say, _"I'm back"_ with a stupid smile on your face. And regardless of how early in the morning it may have been, you made me smile. That's when I realized... I had feelings for you.”

 

“I feel stupid saying this now. It was pathetic, so I never wanted to admit it. But… that you would even allow me to be your friend, that I could see you every day, meant the world to me. And it didn't matter how I felt, I knew... that if I ever decided to tell you, I would lose you. Because, even if you would have reject me in the kindest way and keep stopping by the café each time you came to work, I knew I wouldn't be able to bare it. That I would eventually give in and start avoiding you. That's why I decided you didn't needed to know. And gradually each day became better than the last because you were always there. Soon enough, it wasn't just the thought of my paycheck that made me go to work each morning, but the fact that I had to be there to make you that first cup of coffee to get you through the day.”

 

“You became my best friend, so I made up my mind to get rid of what I had felt for you once. I didn't want it to get in my way to keeping things as they were. It took me a while but eventually I taught myself to stop looking at you such way and it helped me to be more honest with you. I thought those days would never end. But then _he_ came along… Anon.”

 

“I thought _he_ was just another freak on _his_ phone, desperate for attention. I thought you would grow tired of it quickly, but… I underestimated _him_. I couldn’t take you seriously when you spoke of _him_. There was no way that freak would have won you over with just text. It couldn’t have been that easy. When I’d tried so much before… It was humiliating. Who the hell did _he_ think _he_ was? What was so different about _him_? How could you have fallen for someone like that? I couldn’t stand it. Or maybe… Maybe it was me who never tried hard enough.”

 

“When I said I was going to try and understand your feelings, I meant it. I realized that time I spent away from you that I couldn’t be mad with you for liking Anon. Since it was what you wanted, I couldn’t change your mind. It would have been easier, though … if you decided to be in love with Jun instead. I knew since the first time I saw you together that he was crazy for you, but man… you were always bad at picking up my flirting, there was no doubt Jun was going to have a rough time with you as well. What I didn’t predict, though… was that Jun would lose even to _him_. Then I realized I couldn’t keep pretending. You were asking me to stay still and watch a crash in slow motion. I couldn’t allow it… I simply couldn’t.”

 

“I was about to let it go. If I saw you with _him_ tonight, if you were already gone, I would have let it go. But you were there, alone, soaking yourself in the rain like an idiot, just when you got over a cold… I understood the only idiot had been me all along and I was not going to let _him_ make a fool out of you anymore…”

 

“Nino…” Aiba noticed the younger’s voice cutting again, but Nino refused to let it stop him. He carried on.

 

“Don’t get me wrong. I’m saying this now because I’m over you. It took me some time, but… I can admit it now because... I feel like it's happening all over again. I think... I'm in love with someone. I didn’t think I would be able to admit it, but… I understand now. He’s been there with me all this time. Even when I rejected him once, he’s been so patient with me… even though I’m probably a wreck to him. He... has made me the happiest I’ve ever been this past few months. When I’m with him, it reminds me of when I first met you and how I felt back then... it feels right. He’s far more than what I could ever ask for.”

 

Ninomiya paused. He stared at his feet not knowing where else to look. Trying to reach back to his words as he dried his face with his sleeves.

 

“I will never regret getting up that morning when I didn't want to go to work. If I hadn't, I would have never met you, or fall in love with you... Nor would I allow myself to be in love now.” When he finally turned towards Aiba, the latter could see the glistening of his eyes. “Listen to me,” Nino spoke in alert this time. “If Anon truly feels the slightest bit in love with you as I felt before, he wouldn't go another day hiding from you. He wouldn't bear the thought of making you hurt like this. If he truly loves you... he would stop being a coward. This isn't about who is through that phone anymore. You should go and follow whoever you truly believe deserves your attention. Whoever makes all those promises he has fooled you with and keeps them.”

 

Aiba couldn’t hold himself back any longer. It was painful to think he’d made his friend go through so much for so long without realizing a thing. How blind could he have been that he never noticed his kindness before? His guilt was great, but even greater was his happiness to know Nino was still his friend.

 

Instead of giving him a verbal response, Aiba nodded to him, but he couldn’t help but feel it wasn’t enough. When he recognized he wouldn’t be able to hold his flowing tears back, Aiba gave in and trapped Nino in a sudden and tight embrace. The younger couldn’t say he was completely surprised for Aiba had always been a cry baby, although he always cried hardest for the wrong reasons. Although he thought about it for a long second, Ninomiya returned the gesture, his hand patting on Aiba’s back to let him know it would be okay. He was not mad. He did not hate him.

 

Nino had begun to feel his eyes watering again too, yet he couldn’t help but chuckle due to the way his friend sobbed disgustingly into his shoulder, running the mood for both. Yet Nino chose to forgive him this once.

 

~

 

That next morning, when Aiba woke up beside Nino, he found a clarity that wasn’t there before. He decided that moving on from anon was his best option. It was the least Aiba could do to start making something right.

 

Nino decided not to comment on it. Knowing his friend, he would just have to wait and see if Aiba would find it as easy as he thought it was initially. Nino was ready to support his decision, regardless and gave Aiba an earnest “good luck”.

 

“You sure you’ll be okay?” Aiba couldn’t help but ask yet again as they both entered the company building.

 

“I already told you, I’m fine,” Nino breathed out. “Stop asking as if I were sick.”

 

Aiba was sorry for insisting, but he didn’t want to take things lightly with him, not when he was sure his friend would have been better taking the day off for once.

 

“You’ll call me if you need anything, right?”

 

“Yeah, sure…”

 

“You promise?”

 

“No.”

 

They both rode the elevator to Nino’s floor when Aiba dared to ask. “Then, if you don’t want to talk to me, at least… would you call your boyfriend?” Ninomiya said nothing, almost refusing to meet the other’s gaze. He honestly had hoped Aiba would have forgotten that part of his confession. “He’s looking out for you, no? Please… contact him if you don’t feel like working, okay?”

 

It took a lot of effort, but Nino couldn’t stop the smile from peeking in between his lips. “Mhm…”

 

“What’s so funny?”

 

 “Nothing,” Nino lied through his teeth.

 

“He works here, doesn’t he?” The elevator ascended until it came to a halt on Nino’s floor. “Would you introdu-”

 

“No,” Nino cut him off when he stepped out. Before Aiba could protest, Nino explained. “He asked me to keep it quiet. Sorry. That includes you.” He escaped right after, saving himself from the interrogation and leaving to work.

 

Aiba thought it strange that Nino’s relationship had any reason to be kept secret, yet, if it made his friend this much happier, there shouldn’t be anything to worry about. Nino had incredible instincts and he would never involve himself in something so complicated. If anything, Aiba had to acknowledge Nino was in better hands.

 

~

 

_‘Hello there, Aiba.’_

_‘I’m sorry for contacting you at a time like this,_  
I know you must be busy, but I’ve been hoping we   
could chat, and if time allows it, I would like to meet   
with you.’

_‘I’ll be waiting for your response.’_

_‘I’m sorry. I don’t have you in my contacts. Who is this?_  
 I’m sure I can arrange some time for you with  
 some more information.’

_‘I must say I feel a bit shocked that you never saved_  
 my number in all this time. Makes me think twice about   
contacting you like this. Luckily, I knew you were always   
an airhead so I can’t be too surprised, can’t I?’

_‘I’m sorry?’_

_‘No clue at all? Well… might as well make myself  
a stranger and have my fun with it.’_

_‘Excuse me if I’ve offended you, but I’ve had enough_  
of strangers stealing my phone number. If you won’t identify   
yourself I’m afraid I won’t be able to assist you.’

_‘Alright, alright… I understand. Just cut me some slack,_  
 would you? Man… after I probably saved your ass all the  
 way through high school you consider me a stranger, Aibaka.’

_‘What?’_

_‘You’re going to keep dragging this on? What?  
Not enough for you? Damn… I sure overestimated you.’_

_‘Kazama?’_

_‘There you go! Wasn’t that hard, was it?’_

_‘It’s really you?’_

_‘I’m so sorry I had no idea.’_

_‘I could tell. Luckily, it’s still funny to make a  
 fool out of you, Aibaka.’_

_‘For some of us at least.’_

_‘Then? What do you say we have a beer for old time’s sake?’_

_‘I guess it wouldn’t be bad. I’ve been meaning to  
see you as well. What is it you want to talk about?’_

_‘It’s better if we do this in person, don’t you think, Aibaka?’_

~

 

_‘He’s an old friend, no? Go. It’ll be fine.’_

_‘Yeah but… I wanted us to do something together  
instead. I don’t want to leave you alone tonight.’_

_‘It’ll be fine, so go. It must be something  
 important if he texted so suddenly.’_

_‘Yeah… I guess.’_

_‘Are you sure it’s okay?’_

_‘Aiba, I swear, if you ask one more time...’_

_‘…’_

_‘If it’s of any consolation, I wanted to cancel  
 plans with you tonight.’_

_‘But why?’_

_‘It’s kind of obvious.’_

_‘?’_

_‘Your boyfriend?’_

_‘Did you have plans together?’_

_‘I sort of made them just a moment ago.’_

_‘Really? YOU asked him out? On a date?’_

_‘…’_

_‘Nino… I never took you as one to take the initiative!  
 When did you switch sides?’_

_‘That’s none of your damn business.’_

_‘That’s interesting. Do you really like him that much?’_

_‘Stupid…’_

_‘You have no excuse. Stop butting in and go  
 see your friend.’_

_‘Alright. But, take it easy with him, okay? And don’t tire  
yourself too much. Remember your back pains.’_

_‘Oh! Don’t forget to use protection!’_

_‘STOP MAKING IT WEIRD.’_

~

 

After work, Aiba had no other choice than to agree to Kazama’s invitation. He showed himself out of the office a little earlier, just to avoid having to be seen by the director or even by Jun a last time that day. If the days were to get any more awkward with them around, Aiba didn’t know how he would be making it to work from now on.

 

Kazama had asked for him to meet him at the bar Aiba frequented with Nino. Initially, it had been Kazama who showed him the food there and it was always because of Aiba’s insistence that he would return there with Nino almost every day after work. Remembering it now only made him wonder of the reasons why Nino always agreed to do everything he asked.

 

It was easy to spot Kazama sitting at a lonely table on the far side of the small restaurant. When the other spotted Aiba, he waved him over under a cloud of cigarette smoke. It was a usual site at such a restaurant, although Aiba’s memories of Kazama didn’t picture him as a smoker.

 

“You came right on time, how honest of you!” Kazama said, offering Aiba to sit across him. Once they settled, Kazama didn’t delay on shouting towards a waiter for an order of beers.

 

“I’m sorry to have called you out like this. I can’t imagine how busy you must be.” Kazama began between sips of beer.

 

“It’s not that bad…” Aiba tilted his head.

 

Kazama looked up from his drink a little strange. “Really? Would you say it has been worse?” Aiba pursed his lips doubtfully, unwilling to answer. “You were never the type to complain, were you?” Kazama chuckled.

 

Aiba found himself staring at Kazama. He didn’t know what to expect from his old friend after such a long time, and he was surprised to find him better than what he initially imagined. “If I’m not wrong, the last time I saw you, we were at that dinner party with the office.”

 

“That’s right,” said Kazama. “I thought I would drink with you back then, but you seemed pretty busy yourself with that new friend of yours.” Aiba wondered if he meant Jun. “I only got to see you by the very end, even though I served you a drink and all…”

 

A thought struck Aiba when he remembered his glass being full that night, although he had guessed it to be someone else. “…You did?”

 

“Yeah, it was no big deal.”

 

Aiba brushed the thought off his head. He had no reason to be thinking of _him_ again. “You had me worried after you left the company. Have you found another job yet?” Aiba asked Kazama.

 

“If you call those midnight construction sites ‘a job’, then yeah, I guess I do.” Kazama said, with a hint of sarcasm that made Aiba regret bringing it up. He couldn’t say much in return but to apologize.

 

“Don’t worry about it so much, it’s my problem. Or rather… it serves me right, no?” He took a last hit from his cigarette before putting it out on the ash tray sitting between them, his cheerfulness fading along with the smoke.

 

“You wanted to talk to me about…?” Aiba stepped in quickly as to not discourage him.

 

Kazama paused as if considering something. “Before we get into that… I’ve been meaning to ask you about what happened a couple of days ago,” He said, only gaining a frown from Aiba. “About the director and you. They say you got in a tight spot with him the other day.”

 

“Oh…” Aiba’s look fell with the reminder. “You heard?”

 

“I have my connections. So…?” Kazama lay back on his chair. “Any idea why he hasn’t fired you yet?”

 

“He’s busy,” Aiba said. “I suppose… he thinks it’s a waste of time to deal with me right now, considering all the trouble I’ve already caused.”

 

“Oh please, that wasn’t you. Then again… Sakurai isn’t the most clever when it comes to pointing fingers.” Aiba couldn’t agree more. “But, it’s still strange… He didn’t waste any time when he got rid of me.”

 

“If I’m completely honest, a lot has been going around. I’m not even sure I would say the office has been the same lately.”

 

“Right… about that, I guess it’s about time I apologized,” Kazama straightened himself on his chair, setting down his cup before he looked straight at Aiba. “I may have made a mistake a while ago and… I’ve been meaning to say this honestly to you. Aiba… I am very sorry.” Kazama bowed his head to the other, leaving Aiba clueless as to why. “It’s been a while, but I had to come up to you myself, even though the others disagreed…”

 

“Others?” Aiba repeated, asking for a response.

 

“You see, Aiba… After I was fired from the company, I pretty much had nowhere to go. It’s tough out there to be unemployed and being fired by Sakurai Sho doesn’t exactly leave your credentials intact. I was pretty much getting nowhere and who knows where I would have ended up if it weren’t for these people. They contacted me not long after Sakurai kicked me out. I recognized some of them and it was easy to guess they had all been in the company before. In fact, we had all been fired by the same person. Meeting them was not a coincidence. As I got to know them I realized we all had something in common. None of us were treated fairly. They’ve been wronged by the company, just as I’d been. They asked for my help and I couldn’t agree more. Only problem was we made a mistake… and it got you involved,”

 

“What are you saying?” Aiba couldn’t help asking the more the other delayed.

 

“I guess you remember what happened with the elevator some time back.” Kazama said. Aiba’s gaze widened as what he feared became known. “We’re really sorry. We didn’t mean to get you stuck in there. I really wanted to get you out myself, but if word got out that someone had damaged the system, we would have been caught.”

 

“It was you.”

 

“I swear it was not our intention. Sakurai got away from us. We just didn’t think you would be in there too.”

 

“It was you,” Aiba repeated. “I saw you that morning, I remember. You were there… You’re not lying.”

 

“That’s why I needed to see you and apologize in person.”

 

“You said that ‘the others disagreed’. ‘Disagreed’ to what?” Aiba asked.

 

“They didn’t want me to tell you this, but they don’t know you as well as I do. I trust you. You’re my friend after all. Yet… I’m afraid I had to agree with a condition before I came here.” Aiba listened, a bad feeling growing in his stomach. “They said I could only tell you this if I asked for your help.”

 

“And what exactly am I supposed to help you with?” Aiba asked.

 

Kazama sighed. “Guess there’s no other nice way to say this but… we’re trying to get back on Sakurai for obvious reasons. Thing is, it’s kind of complicated when we can’t get into the office as regular employees anymore. It’s not much what we’re asking. We just need a couple of eyes and ears to tell us a way to get the damn guy. A flaw, perhaps a weakness. Anything that’ll get us into that bastard’s head.”

 

“And, under your colleagues’ criteria, what makes them think I should be helping you with any of that after they were the ones who got me involved?”

 

“You’re getting fired soon, no?” Kazama interjected. “It won’t be long until we’re on the same side. On top of that, you even got blamed for something someone else did. It’s a shame. Sakurai can’t even distinguish you as loyal employee even though all you do is work your butt off. It’s kind of frustrating, isn’t it? And you don’t even get a chance to speak back at him, even though it was all his mistake.”

 

“That’s very unlike you, Kazama,” Aiba commented. “To put words in my mouth.”

 

“So, you’re saying I’m wrong?”

 

Aiba didn’t respond and looked at the other, seeing his friend, but listening to a total stranger.

 

“Look, Aiba… I know you like playing the innocent, but you won’t get anything done if you don’t step up to this sort of things. He wronged you. You should feel angry for once!”

 

“I am angry, Kazama. More than what you can imagine. I just can’t tell who I’m most angry at right now.”

 

Kazama squinted his eyes at Aiba, noticing the look the latter shot him. Once he realized what was happening, he scoffed.

 

“You can’t be serious…”

 

“Dead.” Aiba quickly responded.

 

“After how he humiliated you? You’re really going to defend him? Instead of doing something for yourself?”

 

“I can’t accept your offer, Kazama. I’m truly sorry.” Aiba slightly bowed his head to the other as his final answer.

 

Kazama looked away, his chin falling on his hand, unable to bring himself to accept Masaki’s answer. “You know… I really overestimated you, Aibaka.” Kazama said. “I thought it would be easier to convince you. That you could tell right from wrong.”

 

“That’s exactly what I thought about you. But I guess we were both wrong,” said Aiba, gaining a look from Kazama that could only mean disappointment. This was not the first time someone looked at him that same way and Aiba couldn’t say he felt any more threatened now.

 

When Aiba decided he had heard enough, he immediately got on his feet. Excusing himself from his colleague, he walked out of the restaurant, putting an end to their meeting. Yet Kazama refused to leave his seat even after Masaki had left and took out his phone instead. He dialed a number and set the phone to his ear before the call was picked up from the other side almost right away.

 

“Hey, it’s me… … Yeah, I spoke to him. He just left… … You were right. It didn’t work… … No, no. I wouldn’t call it a waste of time… … I’m not too sure, but… there’s something peculiar about this. I’m don’t think I’m ready to let go of him just yet… … No, don’t worry. This is my problem. I’ll take care of it myself.”

 

~

 

Masaki couldn’t blink an eye that night, thinking he may have gone too far. He realized he felt sorry for talking back to Kazama, but he mostly regretted that he hadn’t said more. It was true Kazama’s words had left him with utter indignation, but perhaps he could have handled things differently as to not put himself on Kazama’s bad side. Who knew what sort of “contacts” he had in the office, watching everything that happened. Soon enough, Masaki was sure, he would lose Kazama’s trust completely.

 

While he sat at his desk the next morning, Aiba’s head had already slipped from his hand, almost surrendering to his tiredness. After many attempts on focusing back on his work, he acknowledged he couldn’t fight his weariness and decided he needed that second cup of coffee right about now.

 

It even took him a lot more effort than anticipated to get up from his desk. Luckily, Jun wasn’t present at his desk to witness his struggle. He headed lazily towards the break room with what little energy he had left, and just when he was about to go in, he was awakened by an unanticipated bump on his shoulder, shaking him enough to almost lose his balance.

 

He was about to complain of the pain but apologized right after realizing his negligence caused the secretary to drop the documents he carried. He kneeled to help Ohno pick up what he could reach, the other also sprinkling apologizes for the incident, probably just as asleep as Aiba was.

 

Aiba would have said it was all his fault, but his eyes had fixed elsewhere, by a document laying openly and invitingly in front of him. A title in bold. Underlined. Impossible to miss. Along with the large paragraph of lines it followed underneath that only took a glimpse to figure out.

 

When Ohno picked it up, Aiba’s sight followed the document until it was hidden under Ohno’s handful of papers. Ohno finally recovered and after a last small apology, he walked back into the director’s office. Aiba had not yet picked himself from the ground, thinking of the document Ohno carried away.

 

The lay-offs. It was the perfect scenario. Laying Aiba off and pretending it were all a coincidence to make himself look better. How much did Sakurai really think this through? Could he have been wrong to think of the director differently all this time? But that was just what he wanted, that praise, that stance of authority. It was always what Sakurai craved the most. Someone to make an example out of. And that was exactly what he was reduced to.

 

Caught up in his own thoughts, Aiba walked into the break room without noticing the coffee machine was occupied by none other than his cubicle neighbor, just in time to make him regret his decision right away. Jun exchanged a look with Aiba who already looked regretful after walking in. Yet Aiba didn’t know if he should’ve proceeded or turned away, knowing he would only be a bother to Jun if he waited for him to finish.

 

“S-Sorry,” Aiba gives him a small look before turning himself around.

 

“Aiba,” Jun calls him back before he could disappear out the door, although Aiba really wished he had the guts to leave. Instead, Aiba waited a second to gather his strength before facing him again. Jun seemed at a loss for words himself, realizing he hadn’t thought this far ahead before calling him. He leaves the silence to do most of the talking before he starts to utter. “Do you… want some coffee?”

 

It wasn’t much of an excuse, and regardless of how uneasy either of them felt already, Aiba accepted more by manners than by desire.

 

Jun helped serve him a cup, but just standing near him in such a cluttered excuse of a break room was unbearable. Aiba doubted his “Thanks” made it any better. Neither of them wanted to make the next move, although they knew whose turn it was.

 

“Listen, I…” Jun began, struggling to find the right words. “Can we… talk for a bit? In private?”

 

~

 

“You must think I’m an asshole. And… I clearly deserve it.” Jun began once they came out to the terrace, his words hurting Aiba more than he thought they did.

 

“Don’t say that,” Aiba approached him, inching towards Jun on the bench. “I would never think that way about you.”

 

“Yeah… I guess I missed seeing that sooner.” Jun’s look fell. “I took advantage of you. It was wrong. I thought I understood you, but… I was only lying to myself. I shouldn’t have done what I did,”

 

“You don’t have to beat yourself up about it, Jun. I didn’t exactly stop you right away either.”

 

“But I was supposed to be helping you… and I only made you uncomfortable. Then I acted like a total jerk… I really blew it, didn’t I?”

 

Jun felt a touch of a hand on his that brought his self-loathing to a halt when he found Masaki’s eyes desperately looking for his.

 

“Jun, I don’t hate you,” Masaki said firmly. “You shouldn’t have any more reason to hate yourself.”

 

Although his eyes overwhelmed with a guilty feeling, Masaki felt Jun ease just a little with his words, comforted by the warm touch of his hands and at the same time surprised, thinking he would have never feel his touch again after what he did.

 

“Was I too late?” Jun fearlessly asked, gaining a pitiful look from Aiba.

 

“Too soon.” Aiba responded. Jun nodded acknowledging while Masaki’s grip tightened on Jun’s hand apologetically. “But I don’t want to think about it anymore. I just… I could really use my friend back.”

 

There was only but a small smile on Jun’s lips that was enough to make Masaki feel secure again.

 

“Me too,” said Jun, admitting he’d remained ignorant for far too long.

 

“Then… would it be selfish if I made use of him right now?” Aiba asked gaining a frown from the younger. “It’ll kill me if I keep this to myself and honestly… I don’t know if I want to.”

 

“What is it?” Jun asked, feeling Masaki’s hand growing sweaty before they retrieved.

 

“I’m… going to be laid off.” Aiba said taking Jun aback. “I saw the report by accident. I didn’t mean to look but… my name was in there,”

 

“Are you sure it was you?” Jun asked.

 

“Yes. There is only one Aiba Masaki in the whole floor and that list was meant for _our_ department. There’s no other explanation.”

 

Jun took a breath to recollect himself before asking the inevitable. “Was my name in there too?”

 

Aiba was about to answer when he cut himself off. He wanted to assure Jun he had nothing to worry about, but he’d almost forgotten Jun carried as much guilt in Sakurai’s eyes as he did. It wouldn’t be strange at all if his name would have been found further on those same papers.

 

“I don’t know…” Was all Aiba could answer and it didn’t help much to hearten Jun’s anxiety. “I really hope not. It’s the last thing you deserve.”

 

“Not more than you.” Jun said and Aiba had no reason to prove him wrong. “What are you going to do?”

 

“Put on my best face and… hope it’s not sooner rather than later,” said Aiba. “It’s the only thing I know how to do.”

 

Seeing Aiba had made up his mind, Jun did not debate him.

 

When the two had gotten into the elevator to return to work, Jun asked suddenly. “Why didn’t you stop me right away?” Masaki looked at him puzzled. “From kissing you,” Jun clarified.

 

“I was looking for something,” Aiba answered timidly, choosing his word carefully as to not hurt Jun’s feelings any further. “I wanted to know what I would find if I did.”

 

“What _did_ you find?”

 

Aiba smiled to himself due to the dwelling innocence Jun’s words always carried. “Someone asking me far more than what I could give them.”

 

~

 

It was the end of the day in what could be his last, but Aiba tried to not let it discourage him. He’d been anticipating it and it was only a matter of time before he would see it come true. Yet, he admitted, having to come with terms with it seemed easier at first. At least for now he could go home knowing he got through this day.

 

Masaki froze, stepping back immediately after attempting to enter the elevator, yet inevitably Sakurai had already taken notice of him. His eyes glancing over Aiba felt like the reminder of their last encounter and Aiba instantly looked away.

 

“I-I’m so sorry, sir. I’ll wait for the next one.” Aiba slightly bowed his head, wishing the elevator doors would close faster, but just when they were about to, Sakurai’s hand stopped them in time.

 

Aiba’s gaze raised timidly, wondering if this meant he had something he’d forgotten to say, and it was only worth saying now. Perhaps his anger hadn’t washed away and Aiba had just gotten himself in more trouble for whatever the reason. Aiba waited for anything, but Sakurai only took his time, making his wait a lot more unbearable. Aiba felt afraid again.

 

“Get in.” Sakurai uttered. It wasn’t a courtesy or a suggestion. It was a command. Something Aiba very much wished against.

 

“But-”

 

“I said… get in.” Sakurai cuts him off and makes way for Masaki to step inside.

 

Masaki wondered why it had to come to this. Why would he take advantage of his vulnerability and intimidate him this way? As if he knew just how much he could manipulate him for who he was. Aiba realized, it wasn’t frightening at all, it wasn’t fear what he felt. It was anger. Irritation. The sole presence of Sakurai turning up at each corner was just annoying. Why did he always have to obey someone like him? Why couldn’t he deny him for once? How did he know Aiba couldn’t fight him back?

 

Aiba made no further comment. He stepped in and stood nearest to the door where all he could face was the control panel and gave his back to Sakurai. If he at least couldn’t see him, he could pretend he were riding the elevator on his own and eventually, his exasperation would go away. Instead, Sakurai seemed to have other plans.

 

There have only passed seconds when Sakurai cleared his throat. “I don’t find these circumstances to be inappropriate to say… I’ve been meaning to speak with you… If you don’t mind,”

 

Aiba minded. He minded very much. It was the end of the day and the last thing he needed to hear was another complaint from Sakurai.

 

“I believe there has been a misunderstanding between us,” Sakurai said. Masaki frowned at that although the other couldn’t see him. Indeed, there have been a ‘misunderstanding’ but ‘us’ counted for a lot of people. “I’ve… judged you wrong… I hope you can excuse me for… handling things that way. I know now it was not your fault to take, but it would have been easier if you would have told me the truth instead.”

 

So Ohno had told him after all. But was this his idea of making things better or Ohno’s? Judging by how forced Sakurai words seemed, he decided on the latter.

 

“If you wouldn’t have decided to take the blame, none of this would have happened.” Sakurai said and Aiba had to roll his eyes. This still didn’t seem like a good excuse to not fire him. If Aiba was honest, it almost sounded like mockery to him. “But, what I’m trying to say…” Sakurai sighed. The words he wanted were harder to come across than Aiba’s chance of arriving at the lobby. “It was… my bad.”

 

Aiba would admit saying “sorry” would have come out a lot better if only Sakurai would really mean it. Instead, his words had made it sound even worse, contributing to Aiba’s distrust of him. How much, Aiba wondered, was he going to keep making a fool out of him?

 

“It is nothing personal… believe me.” Sakurai dared to say next, and it spent Aiba’s patience.

 

Aiba did not return him a single look or word, and instead braced himself for the opening of the elevator doors once they finally arrived at the lobby. His feet wanted to sprint, but he made himself look as if he was casually ignoring Sakurai’s words entirely. They were all lies anyway. He was ready to walk out and leave Sakurai behind, if it wasn’t for what caught his attention in the middle of the lobby.

 

Nino was expecting him, waiting for Aiba to come down, but it was not him who Nino’s attention was turned to. The latter looked at someone else. His eyes glistening engrossingly. And he smiled, deeply and earnestly. With a small reveal of teeth Aiba recognized he always showed to him, this time directed towards another. And it all shifted, because the next second, Nino had leaned forward to capture their lips. Whom Aiba had initially thought a stranger next to Nino he now identified as Ohno. And Nino kissed him. And kept kissing him. And not for a second did Aiba see Ohno protest. And Ninomiya’s words came barging in again, making sense now more than ever. But it wasn’t just Nino, it was Ohno’s promise Aiba remembered as well.

 

The next second, Aiba’s fingered rammed on the elevator’s door to shut again, blocking the sight towards the lobby and hopefully, obstructing Sakurai’s vision just in time before he could walk out.

 

Aiba sighed heavily, his head banged against the wall. _Stupid!_ He thought to himself. _Nino you stupid…!_

 

“Excuse me?”

 

Masaki was snapped back to the inside of the elevator by Sakurai’s voice. His eyes widen when he remembered he was still there.

 

“What are you…?”

 

Aiba had no choice but to turn towards Sakurai this time, no matter how much he wished he could stay avoiding his gaze, he would surely insist on an explanation now.

 

“I-I…” He panicked. Nothing came to mind. “I needed to speak with you… I-I mean, you wanted to speak with me, no, sir?”

 

Sakurai blinked several times. “Um… Yes, but I already said what I needed to. Would open the door?”

 

Aiba’s body blocked the control panel. “I-I’ve just remembered! I forgot something at the office.”

 

“You’re perfectly capable of going back on your own-”

 

“I-It’s very urgent, sir!”

 

“Step aside, please.”

 

Aiba persisted, not giving in to his order, even if it cost him his job. Not even when Sakurai sighed exhaustedly and reached his way to the control panel only to be stopped by Aiba’s hand quickly preventing him from going any further. Though, it took Aiba more than a second to realize what he’d just done.

 

While it was inevitable that their gazes would encounter, the flustered look in Sakurai made Aiba curse in his head. He began to feel his hands growing sweaty, or was it Sakurai’s? He couldn’t tell anymore. His touch was indescribable, but it was enough to make his heart rate increase the more the silence spread between them. It was not until Sakurai came to his senses that he quickly drew his hand away, hiding it behind him with a slight quiver.

 

Sakurai cleared his throat with difficulty, looking everywhere but at Aiba. He did not have to repeat himself before Aiba was pressing on the doors to open them once again, and with a quick bow he turned away and walked as quickly as he could towards Nino, Aiba’s cheeks violently burning with embarrassment.

 

~

 

The burst of Nino’s laugh could be heard across the restaurant, accentuating Aiba’s pleas for the earth to swallow him whole.

 

“Are you done?” Aiba asked him unamused. It took the younger several minutes to recollect himself and dry the tears his whole-hearted laughter had provoked, overlooking Aiba’s misery.

 

“You held his hand!” Nino kept repeating. “You held his freaking hand!”

 

Aiba ignored his constant reminder, especially when he felt the look of a certain secretary sitting silently by the younger’s side, trying to make himself invisible behind his drink as he found the situation as uncomfortable as Aiba had. When Aiba attempted to meet eyes with him, Ohno quickly looked away.

 

“I have to admit, you still have some guts in you!” Nino commented.

 

“Well… I wouldn’t have done it in the first place if you two wouldn’t have been so obvious!” Aiba complained to divert their conversation. “I thought you said you were trying to keep things secret.”

 

“We were,” Ohno’s voice suddenly stepped in, shooting a look towards Nino.

 

“What are you blaming me for? Don’t act as if you didn’t kiss me back!” Ohno’s elbow was shoved on Nino’s side as a warning look from the older forced Nino to take his word back. “Fine. I’m sorry.” He rolled his eyes.

 

Aiba was not only impressed but stunned at the younger’s behavior with his partner as he knew he would never get a better apology from Nino.

 

“So…?” Aiba straightened up in his chair inspecting the couple sitting across him, although they pretended to be as apart as possible. “Aren’t you going to…?” Aiba gestured towards Ohno.

 

Ninomiya groaned. “Do you really have to?”

 

“Would be rude if I didn’t,” Aiba responded, which only worked to bore Nino even more. “When did you guys get together exactly?”

 

“A couple of months,” Both friends turned towards Ohno who had decided to take word in Nino’s stead.

 

“And you made the first approach I suppose?” Aiba carried on before Nino could complain. “He was who you spoke about, no? At the party?”

 

“Y-Yes,” said Ohno with just a hint of color in his cheeks. “I admit it was complicated at first, but he responded quite well! Though I seriously couldn’t have done it without your advice.”

 

“Is that so? I’m so happy for you both!”

 

Ohno thanked him bashfully while Nino could only follow their conversation with a frowning expression.

 

“Although, if I would have known it was Nino before, I could have given you a different sort of advice.”

 

“Seriously?” interjected Nino.

 

Aiba decided to ignore the younger and leaned over the table as he invited Ohno to do the same. “I know he may seem a little… difficult at times,” Aiba whispered. “But I assure you he really is a hopeless romantic.”

 

“I can hear you. I am literally sitting right in front of you.”

 

“He is really sensitive about it, though, so I wouldn’t suggest you mention it.” Aiba added while Ohno nodded knowingly.

 

“Alright, enough conspiring between you two,” Nino stepped in. “I would appreciate if you wouldn’t gossip about me with my boyfriend. It’s weird.”

 

“Well, it’s not as weird as it is for me, considering your dating my boss. At least it’s nice to have something in common with him for once.”

 

“Yeah, well I don’t go texting Anon things about you, so knock it off.” Nino spit, taking Aiba aback. The latter was about to talk back before he realized he’d lost the words that stood on the tip of his tongue. Instead he decided to keep it to himself. “What? Too soon?” Nino asked, observing the other’s reaction.

 

“You didn’t have to bring him up so suddenly.”

 

“Yeah… my bad.”

 

Aiba’s look had fallen distractingly over the table as Nino realized it had been a bad idea to mention _him_ after all.

 

“You haven’t looked at his messages, have you?” Nino asked. Ohno couldn’t help but stare oddly at Aiba’s mood swing.

 

Aiba shook his head.

 

“You think he’ll stop if you turn your back on him?”

 

“I’m not sure…”

 

“Maybe you should make amends,” Nino’s suggestion gained a surprised look from Aiba. “Why don’t you talk things out with him? It must have been tough for both of you to end things this way. I think you should have an honest talk for once.” Nino took a swig from his beer as he let the words sink in to Aiba. “As long as you don’t fall for his lies I mean,” Nino added.

 

Aiba was mid thought when he realized Ohno’s presence still among them and perhaps too late. “Are you sure we should be discussing this right now?” Aiba asked in a lower tone, while Ohno tried to make himself as detached from their conversation as he could.

 

“It’s fine. He knows.”

 

“What!?”

 

“I may or may not have told him something, so? It’s no big deal.”

 

“Except that he’s my superior, Nino! If word got out about this...”

 

“It’s fine, Aiba. He won’t say a thing to Sakurai, if that’s what you’re worried about. Right, Satoshi?” Ohno snapped back from a thought when he’d suddenly heard Nino calling his name. “You won’t say a word.” Nino repeated.

 

Ohno managed a nod as a possibly too meditated response. Although not feeling close to convinced, Aiba had no other choice but to trust Ohno was as quiet around the director as he was around them. Yet the thought of him being so close to Sakurai gave him no chance of knowing when things could reach unwanted ears, so his restlessness was all but overstated.

 

~

 

“Aiba?” Ohno approached him at the door, going ahead of Nino who had retreated to the restroom. “I hope this doesn’t have to come between us. In the office, I mean,” said Ohno. He’d finally managed to pull off a full sentence but only when Nino wasn’t around them.

 

“I hope so too, um… sir.”

 

“Just Ohno is fine.”

 

Nino didn’t seem to be coming back yet so Aiba carried on. “I was being honest when I said it before, that I’m glad everything worked out. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Nino so comfortable around anyone else before. He looked really… happy.”

 

“You think so?” Ohno questioned, although there was a smile in his lips that confirmed it as well. “This is the first time he’s done something like this for me.”

 

“Like what?”

 

“Ask me to meet his friend, be so open about us, or even… calling me his boyfriend,” The trace of Ohno’s smile widened until a small chuckle escaped him. “He is very unpredictable.”

 

There was so much Aiba would have thought of saying if he would have just been able to, but no matter how much he wanted to see Ohno or even Nino as they were now, Aiba understood there was only so much he could take. He realized this probably made him a most selfish person, but Nino, more than anyone, would understand it if he felt envious of their happiness. Not because of any sort of second thoughts, but from the desire of their status.

 

If he would have only insisted more with Anon, who knew if he would be the one introducing someone to Ninomiya that night. If Anon would’ve had the courage to show himself to Aiba from the start, who knew if they would have been going on a conjoined date with Nino and Ohno by now. It was all but a mass of ‘What if’s that, as far as Aiba could tell, would never be so.

 

~

**Friday** 8:23PM

 

 _‘I should have been honest from the start, but you must_  
know how much of a fool I am and continue to be if I ever  
think you’re going to pay the least bit of attention to me now.   
Still, I won’t hold back to say this.’

 _‘I never wanted you to know who I was. I told you I wasn’t_  
 ready thinking you would eventually forget and accept me  
 for me rather than what I looked like. I was obviously wrong  
and incredibly stupid to think that way once. But that was back  
when I thought you wouldn’t care of who I was in the first place.   
It’s about time I apologize. I am so very sorry.’

**Friday** 12:55PM

 

 _‘You wouldn’t accept me, I made that decision by myself. I also_  
 wouldn’t accept me. I wanted to save you the trouble and still  
 asked for you to trust me. I was a hypocrite. Or rather, I am.’

 _‘Still no matter what I did or said, you believed me. You listened to me._  
 For more than anyone I’ve ever known, you were truthful to me.  
 I couldn’t help but feel like a villain for thinking I had been fooling  
 you all this time. And somehow, I don’t know how, you managed to  
 change me. And I changed my mind for you.’

**Saturday** 11:17PM

 

 _‘I went to the terrace that night. You weren’t there._  
Maybe I was too late. Maybe I’ve tired you enough and you decided  
to forget me finally. I wouldn’t blame you in the least. But believe me   
a last time when I say I was there. And I stayed there the whole night,  
imagining that perhaps you could come back at any moment. After all,   
you promised you would be there. But I realized I couldn’t keep abusing  
your patience. I was too late, wasn’t I?’

_‘Don’t answer that.’_

**Sunday** 6:20PM

 

 _‘I am sorry. I will keep saying it each passing day until I can_  
forgive myself. I don’t see that coming any time soon. I just  
wish I could do so many things over, maybe that would take   
me back to the very first time I decided to talk to you. I would   
have stopped myself, believe me.’’

**Monday** 7:27PM

 

 _‘If there is something I ever learned from you is that I_  
wouldn’t have taken you. If I really did love you, I shouldn’t  
have hurt you. I should have stepped away, I should have  
left you be as I had done all these past years. I shouldn’t have  
damaged you the way I did. I should have forgotten you after all.’

**Tuesday** 11:03AM

 

_‘I’m starting to wonder if you’ve blocked me from your contacts.’_

_‘You should. Honestly. Maybe it’ll keep me away from  
 bothering you anymore.’_

**Wednesday** 11:12AM

 

_‘It’s stupid, but I keep coming back here just to see you’ve  
read my messages.’ _

_‘I am pathetic. But I can’t stop wondering about you.’_

_‘I’m worried.’_

**Wednesday** 10:45PM

 

 _‘I don’t have the right to ask for a sign to know you are okay._  
But even if you yell at me again, even if you want to hurt me,  
let me know I haven’t hurt you. Even if you must lie, I just want  
to hear you.’

_‘Please, Masaki.’_

Masaki went through his texts each night with a pain engraving deeper as a new one never missed to come every single day. Yet again tonight, he had nothing to say. He didn’t want to fall into the trap that Anon’s words lead into. No matter how much it hurt him to ignore him for so long, he wasn’t ready. And neither was Anon, thought Masaki.

 

Masaki set his phone down finally, but not before re-activating his notifications for their chatroom, so when the time came for Anon to be ready, he would make sure to be as well.

 

~

 

Following the meeting he had to get through that morning, Aiba arrived at an unusual time at the office. Setting down his things on his desk with an unenthusiastic sigh never hurt so much, knowing the work he still had to get through before he could take his lunch break with some peace of mind. And even if he tried to engage in work or even start, the initial thought of food had trapped him into not thinking at all. He was about to comment to his cubicle neighbor when his words were cut on the tip of his tongue.

 

It was not just his chair that was empty, his desktop screen was shut off, his keyboard and mouse put away. His books, his supplies, even his miniature bonsai, it had all disappeared. He quickly scanned the room, the panic started to pound when he found no sight of him. And his mind flew to a deeper thought, to the list of the lay-offs he’d barely glanced at. Jun’s countless discussions with the director. Jun’s initial fear now turning into his own.

 

The moment he spotted Ohno walking past their aisle of desks, Masaki didn’t delay another second and ran to him.

 

“Ohno!” Aiba’s call was enough to make the older stop only to be surprised by the other’s agitation as he gripped Ohno’s arms shaking. “Where is Jun?”

 

“Um…” Ohno gazed at the empty desk where the one in question would usually be at.

 

“Why isn’t he here!?”

 

“Didn’t he just leave?” asked Ohno.

 

“Where? Where did he go!?”

 

Ohno stuttered as he tried to recollect his thoughts. “C-Consumer affairs. Twelfth floor?”

 

Aiba didn’t need to hear another word before he sprinted to the elevators, but no matter the amount of times he called for it, he decided to take the emergency stairs. Although he began to regret it halfway, a few flights of stairs were nothing to compared to the things Aiba started to imagine happening. _Why Jun?_ He couldn’t help repeating to himself, almost out of breath. _Why did it have to be Jun?_  

 

But just like Ohno had said, he was there, by the twelfth floor’s reception, carrying a box with his belongings, very much like the first day Aiba had met him.

 

 And even when he was out of breath, his voice still carried out a call as forcefully as it could. “Jun!”

 

It took a full second before the other could turn to the source of Aiba’s voice, freezing in place, astonished by the sight of the other. When their gazes exchanged, everything around them seemed to stop, except Aiba still panted wearily and Jun felt his heart race the more he acknowledged Aiba had come after all.

 

Momentarily, Jun seemed to turn away hurtfully, unknowing of how to react, when he finally decides to set his belongings aside and walk hesitantly to Aiba, unable to meet gazes with him again, or not until he stood barely feet away.

 

“Hey…” Jun is struggling with words, mostly because he could see the anger in Aiba’s eyes.

 

“What are you doing here?” Aiba spoke with frustration. It was a sight Jun hadn’t seen from him before. He understood now, he’d messed up. “I got to the office and your desk… I was so scared! Why the hell did you go!? I thought the worst had happened to you! I thought… I thought I wouldn’t see you again.” Aiba’s words became heavy as he struggled to explain.

 

“I’m sorry,” Jun said, seeing how much he’d made the other worry. “Guess I wanted to surprise you.”

 

Aiba wanted to insult him but his sudden panic had caused for his eyes to water although he refused to show it.

 

“I sort of messed up.” The younger began. “I got a notice from my supervisors this morning, they were going through my evaluations and… I didn’t make it.” Jun sighed. “My probational period… I didn’t meet with their standards so… they decided on sending me back to my old department. I tried everything I could to convince them on letting me stay a little longer, and it may have worked for some time but… it wasn’t enough, so… Here I am.”

 

Aiba sighed, his initial shock driving away as he could finally stop imagining Jun’s dismissal.

 

“I thought you weren’t coming in today, so I figured I could spare telling you. Realized it wasn’t my best idea.” Jun chuckles nervously before his smile shies down. “Are you mad?”

 

Aiba gazes at him with pursed lips. No matter how much he wanted to say, he simply shook his head.

 

Jun tried to hold himself back, but he couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips at just the sight of Aiba. The sound of his laugh suddenly reminded Aiba how much he missed his smile, strong enough to manage a smile out of Aiba’s own lips.

 

“Did you run all the way here?” Jun asks him.

 

“I thought it would be faster.”

 

“I have to say… I’m flattered. Really.” Jun’s eyes are glistening as they manage to capture Aiba in their piercing gaze. “I hope I didn’t cause too much trouble.”

 

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Said Aiba. “Still… you weren’t even going to say goodbye?”

 

“I don’t need to. I know it’s a couple of floors apart but, we can still see each other from time to time, no?”

 

“You promise?”

 

Jun nodded.

 

They both chuckled again before Jun’s smile faded. “It’s been pretty tough, these past few months, but I don’t think I regret a second of it.” Caught up in his momentary silence, Aiba could only agree to himself. “Aiba…” Jun made the other look at him again. “That I could spend all this time with you, has made everything else worth it. Truly… I’m glad I met you.”

 

The instant Jun’s body closed the gap between them and he felt him lean in, Masaki flinched momentarily, making Jun pause to assure him there was nothing to worry about as he guided his lips to leave a small and gentle kiss on Masaki’s cheek. The contact to his skin made Masaki’s face violently color.

 

Jun smiled at the sight of Aiba’s flush as he pulled away, but his smile faded just as quickly. “He is very lucky,” Jun couldn’t help but say to break their silence. Masaki stares back at him blankly. “The guy you like,” Jun clarified. “He is very lucky. I hope he realizes that.”

 

With a last look, Jun turns away, ready to leave Aiba behind before he recognized Aiba’s voice once again.

 

“Jun!” When he captures the attention of the younger, a million thoughts passed through his head, but the only prominent one came to his lips. “You still owe me those drinks!”

 

Jun appeared lost for a long second before the reminder hit him, smiling at the other as a sign that he would keep that promise.

 

~

 

The day had come and gone slowly and quietly, but almost ironically, Aiba couldn’t concentrate. His mind kept going back and forth, finding Jun’s empty desk beside him and his phone staring back at him. There was nothing he could do about Jun’s old desk, yet surely, there was still something he should have done a while ago. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be late to do so now.

 

After gathering his things to return home, Aiba took his time before exiting the office to contemplate his chatroom with Anon once again. His eyes traced over the text of Anon’s last ignored messages before he decided on the words that would help him begin. As he left his desk and walked towards the elevators, he typed.

 

_‘You didn’t write a message yesterday. Are you  
planning on not writing one today as well?’_

_‘What am I saying? You must have grown tired  
 of me already. And if not me, my ignorance.’_

_‘I was only meaning to see how further it would  
go on. If I’ve hurt your feelings, I’m sorry.’_

Aiba pause, watching one elevator leave after another. There was no hurry to get home like the eagerness he felt to get his feeling across. He waited until the words came on their own.

 

 _‘Is it strange to say that I miss you? It probably is, but_  
 I don’t know how else to greet you. I suppose that means  
 I have no shame to be writing like this now. I didn’t even wait  
 for the end of the day to do it. I suppose   
I’ve made you wait long enough.’

_‘Is it better this way, Anon? Forget each other and  
 move on? Is there no other alternative?’ _

_‘Who am I kidding? If you didn’t do it in the past there is_  
 no reason I should think you’ll do it now. You said it yourself.  
 It was never your intention for me to insist on who you were,  
 but you really were an idiot to think I wouldn’t care or…   
that I wouldn’t fall in love with you.’

Aiba steps up to call the elevator this time and waits on his own.

 

 _‘I wonder why yet and yet again I chose you over_  
everyone else. It’s like I haven’t learned a thing, like I have no  
 remorse when, honestly, I really wish you would have fought  
 for me more.’

 _‘When you were angry, I couldn’t recognize you and I felt_  
 scared of losing you. What I felt then hasn’t really gone away,  
 it has only evolved. After reading your messages, it has softened,   
shaped into a new kind of sentiment. Sort of like the kind you would get  
 if you had to say good bye to a close friend. Even worse…   
when you have to break up with someone. And honestly,  
 I’m sick of being the one who has to end everything.’ 

The elevator arrived, and he stepped in, selecting the lobby, and sinking against the back of the empty elevator.

 _‘Since when does this have to be another break up?_  
Why is it me who’s always taking that step first?  
 I wonder if I’m running away. I don’t want to do it,  
 so I ask myself, do I even have to?’

The elevator doors stop abruptly and open again, but why should Aiba feel surprised anymore? Whom other than Sakurai would be stealing the comfort of his elevator? At this time of the evening, Aiba has no willingness to shoot him a stare and sort of accepts the fact that he wouldn’t be riding the elevator on his own after all.

 

Aiba’s “Good evening,” resolves as a sign for Sakurai to step in, although he had no reason to hesitate considering the times he’d made Aiba do the same. The director doesn’t return his greeting and turns his back to him instead. Aiba takes it he was not in the mood for chatter, so he gladly returned to his phone.

 

 _‘Truth is, I was really angry too, but I shouldn’t have taken_  
 it out on you that way. I must have said very hurtful things.  
 I guess that is one thing I am willing to forget. Honestly,  
 I wish I could stop thinking at all. Thinking things   
over and over never got me anywhere.’ 

The short ringing of a phone makes Aiba raise his sight, yet the other makes no effort to attend it. With just a glimpse, he could tell Sakurai looked tense. Did this mean he was mad? And if Sakurai were mad at him, why would he bother to share the elevator this time? Aiba sees no point in wasting his energy on him so he returned to his phone.

_‘The truth only helped to dig me deeper in doubt. It never_  
 made me happy. Then, am I supposed to tell myself it’s okay,  
 that I don’t need to know everything and move on?’

Another ring. He ignores it the same.

 

 _‘If that is the condition of your company, maybe I would be_  
 willing to risk it again. I’ve been thinking now, if I’ve gotten  
 this far ahead with such great memories, maybe risking   
myself for you wasn’t so bad after all.’

_‘Right?’_

This time the consecutive rings interrupted Masaki’s thoughts, when Sakurai finally decided to pay heed to his phone. He felt his coat and pockets eagerly, and when he finds it in his back pocket, he does little more than mute his phone before he puts it away again. Aiba’s eyes were glued on him, catching but a glimpse of his phone as he refused to answer it in Aiba’s presence. Why would he even bother to let it ring? Masaki thought to himself, the sole actions of the other enough to irritate him and break his concentration. 

 

He is about to return to his typing when he finds the last messages he’d sent staring back at him. His fingers wavering over the keyboard, taken away from all thought when his eyes trace back to the one before him. The elevator rumbles as it approaches the lobby, and Masaki’s attention had left his phone. He wonders if he’ll hear it again. He waits for it to happen, and when it doesn’t he took his chances. The word came freely, purposely, and slightly hesitant.

 

_‘Anon?’_

 

There is but a subtle indication of a vibration that the other made no effort to attend. If only, they did nothing more than stir something in Aiba’s chest when he refused. And Aiba was willing to prove it again, if it only meant having to exit his chatroom to dial a phone number instead. There is a moment of relief, a breather, or the knowing of a false alarm when he hears nothing. But then it came, the presumed arrival of a phone call that turned everything else inaudible.

 

The other takes the vibrating phone from his pocket to look at his caller before letting his hand fall on his side and doesn’t look at it again. He lets it throb repeatedly and hysterically, detaching himself from its sound, knowing it would only be in vain to stop it. The call is finally missed. When the elevator came to a halt, Sakurai’s gaze encountered Masaki’s, and everything became still.

 

In the core of the bristling hair on Masaki’s skin, the familiarity of his touch burns. His mouth dries with the remains of a distant feeling of another against his lips as he recognizes the shape of them on his own. If he stepped any closer, the striking scent of a cologne printed in his memory would find him. It was no stranger but a stranger all the same. Before he could stop it all from coming back to him, the throbbing in his chest said it all.

 

Sakurai’s gaze fell, apprehended under Masaki’s blurry sight as the latter waited for an answer, if any. But now, just as always, he is rejected, shunned away, and denied from his voice. Like a coward hiding under his own shadow, only this time he couldn’t escape from Masaki anymore.

 

When the elevator opens, Masaki stormed out, avoiding Sakurai’s eyes following him as he did.

 

“Wait…” Aiba realizes he is trailing behind him and he tries to escape. “Masaki… Please!” Sakurai grabbed on his arm, making him come to a halt.

 

“Don’t touch me!” Masaki snapped, shoving Sakurai’s hand away.

 

“Please, Masaki… Let me explain-” Before the other is finished, his words were taken away by a blow lashing across Sakurai’s face, pronouncing a shade of red that matched the one in Aiba’s hand. The commotion didn’t go unnoticed by the bystanders in the reception as some even had stopped to stare.

 

“Don’t call me by my name,” Masaki fumed with a shuddering breath. “Don’t you dare pretend you can!”

 

“Please… listen to me…” Sakurai insisted in a low voice, trying to avoid bringing more attention on himself. “I’m sorry…” His voice was cut when the words got stuck in his throat. “There was no other way-”

 

Aiba scoffed in disbelief, his anger getting the best of him. “No other way? So, you decided it was best to stay a coward? It was easier for you to lie to me and manipulate everything and everyone to get to me? How could you!? I gave you my thrust! I gave you a chance and I swore I would accept you no matter what, but you… Why does it have to be you?” Masaki’s tears had begun to stream down his face. “Why is it… you?”

 

Sakurai could only stare at the other with hurt, unable to utter an answer for him, afraid he had lost him completely. But seeing Masaki breaking before him made him long to touch him and to stop his tears.

 

“Please…” Sakurai’s shaking voice pleaded, trying to close the distance between them when Masaki took a step back, not allowing him to move any closer.

 

“Get the hell away from me,” Aiba’s words paralyzed him as Aiba slipped away from his reach, turning his back to him, and walking away.

 

Sakurai stared at Masaki’s back as he walked out of the building and disappeared through the glass doors. The people that had stopped finally walked away, avoiding the man who had seemed to fall apart in the middle of the reception.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 9. How many of you knew it? This story is still not over. Thanks for reading~!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 10! We get to see a very different perspective of things. A very special thanks to my friend Dhay for her help ^^ Right text is Aiba. MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks and I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 10

 

 

There was a single knock on the door before Ohno showed himself into the private office. He glanced towards the end of the room and paused at the unusual sight before quickly shutting the door behind him. The empty desk was a mess of papers while the one responsible stood by a window.

 

Ohno could immediately tell the other’s anxiousness hadn’t let him sit still all morning, and he braced himself before moving into the room, holding on to the papers in his hands to summon the patience he needed.

 

“I’m here,” Ohno announced, greeted by the other’s back as Sakurai left a wall of silence spread between them. Ohno recognized the mug he’d prepared for the director that morning sitting by the latter’s desk, cold and neglected, along with everything else spread over the table.

 

“I thought you said you couldn’t sleep last night,” Ohno commented on the cup of coffee, but by Sakurai’s silence, Ohno could tell he didn’t want to address the matter. “You should at least eat something.”

 

“I’ve lost my appetite.” Sakurai responded. Ohno frowned at him clueless of how to approach the matter, but knowing he was no match for Sakurai’s stubbornness, there was little he could do.

 

“Should I go through the schedule?” Ohno asked. Sakurai didn’t respond and kept his stance. Nonetheless, Ohno began. “I’ve sent in the report on this week’s advances. Everything seems to be in order. Management wants to confirm a meeting for this afternoon. They expect to hear an answer from us by then. The accounting division will also be present so it’s important that we confirm. In the meantime, we should go through those expense reports. Are you done with-” Ohno holds on to his question. With just a glimpse over the desk, he notices the papers he’d put in front of Sakurai himself days ago, and just like back then, they remained blank. “You haven’t signed,” Ohno said, not at all surprised.

 

Sakurai sighs, already worn out by Ohno’s complains. “I’ve been busy, Ohno.”

 

“With?” Ohno refuted. “And your answer better be work.”

 

“I’ve been thinking.”

 

“About him?” Ohno asked. The silence he received from the other said it all. “Sho, we don’t have time for this. The board’s been breathing down my neck because of you. You can’t make them wait forever! If you’re going to choose someone else we need it done now, or else I need you to approve these candidates right away.”

 

Sakurai gives in, turning away from the window in a frantically to grab a pen by his desk and write his signature on the paper before them. He does it so hurriedly Ohno thinks the piece of paper would rip with the pressure of his pen, but once Sakurai is done he hands the document back to Ohno in a single piece, avoiding Ohno’s gaze and returning to the window right after.

 

Ohno eyed him questioningly, surprised Sakurai signed off so quickly a decision he had been pondering over for more than a week. There was certainly something skeptical about the other’s silence and Ohno decided to take his chances and look through it himself. He understood what was going on with just the first lines of the document.

 

“You took him down… You’re keeping him after all,” Ohno concluded. Sakurai could only shut his eyes, being caught by the other.

 

“I don’t want to hurt him anymore, Ohno.”

 

“So, he is still in your best interests.”

 

“What else would you have me do?”

 

“You should have done what was fair to start with.” Ohno spit to him. “As head of this office, you haven’t made a single decision as his boss. Everything he says, you do, and the rest you manipulate for his sake! Do you realize how unethical that is? If it wasn’t obvious before, it’ll be now!” Ohno didn’t mean to raise his voice, but it was almost unavoidable when the other would barely glimpse at him. “I’m sorry to say this, but you should have fired him.”

 

“Is that all?” Sakurai asked.

 

“No,” Ohno responded boldly, letting the papers in his hand sit on Sakurai’s desk. “Sho… What happened to you?” Ohno asked in a lower tone, not as his assistant but as a friend with genuine concern. “You told me you wouldn’t get carried away, but this is already out of your control. You’re not even thinking for yourself! You can’t even judge who you’re really doing this for… Why do you even let him control you this way?”

 

Sakurai breathed out. He arranged his suit and tie before he turned towards his secretary and took his seat. As always, he didn’t want to talk. He was sick of hearing what Ohno had to say and was so incompetent he couldn’t fight the other. He rustled through the papers laying on his desk and made himself look busy, running away from Ohno’s judgement.

 

“Cancel my meeting for this afternoon. I need it rescheduled for tomorrow morning. I suggest you take those documents to management right away. Also, please make the announcement that evaluations for this month will be postponed. If anyone asks, I ordered it.” Sakurai spoke as a final command, letting him know he will not resume with their discussion.

 

For several seconds, Ohno stood before him hoping his words would somehow come across, but eventually he realized he was only wasting his energy. Ohno bowed and moved away to carry out Sakurai’s instruction, but not before shooting a painful look at the other. Was this really what Sakurai had been reduced to after a rejection? If anything, Ohno was thankful Sakurai’s professional appearance at least allowed him to seem as composed as ever in front of everyone else.

 

“Ohno…” Sakurai’s voice manifested itself once again, making the secretary turn towards him. Sakurai spoke with great hesitation, knowing his words would only stir the other more, but it was a risk he was willing to take. “Did he come?”

 

Ohno’s look towards Sakurai showed disappointment, understanding he will never give up. Nevertheless, the secretary answered, hoping it would make Sakurai understand his anticipation had been in vain. “No.”

 

With Ohno’s words Sakurai seemed uneasy. His fingers brushed over his mouth anxiously, his fallen look paused aimlessly on his desk as his mind wandered. He couldn’t think of a single reason that didn’t imply blaming himself as it tortured him to know he was the cause of all of it. Ohno waited for a further command that, judging by Sakurai’s state, would not arrive, and eventually he walked out the door.

 

Ohno’s eyes glanced over the lane of cubicles briefly before they stopped by an empty one. It was the same one he would look out for whenever Aiba Masaki was present. It had almost become his duty to watch his desk in Sakurai’s stead. Ohno hated the manner of this new task most of all but seeing that the smallest report on his observations would make Sakurai forget his formal sternness had made Ohno comply each passing day. But now, Ohno had to admit Sakurai had crossed a line he couldn’t follow, and he feared the outcome of Sakurai’s decisions would only worsen with time (if there really was any way it could get worse).

 

 

Ohno didn’t take another step before his shoulder was roughly brushed aside. The strength used by the other was clearly intentional, almost making him drop the documents in his hands. When his eyes followed the individual walking past him, his complaint was cut short as he held his breath. Watching the familiar back of his body walk through the office and entering the door Ohno had just left. A bad feeling stirred in his stomach before he hurried back into Sakurai’s office.

 

Sakurai jolted due to the abrupt intrusion of a young man walking into his private office, a piercing look of anger painted in his eyes, carrying a cup on one hand while the knuckles of the other turned white with closed fists, enough to convey to Sakurai the reason of his visit.

 

Sakurai was startled up from his chair when the loud stomping of his feet approached him, and before Ohno could prevent it, the barista ruthlessly flung the strong scented cup of coffee at Sakurai, wetting his clothes and letting it spill on the documents on top of Sakurai’s desk.

 

“Nino, what are you doing!?” Ohno pulled on Nino’s arm which the latter coldly brushed off, silencing Ohno while keeping his eyes on Sakurai.

 

“I should have known…” Nino spoke with a ragged breath. “He never got fired. Even when you yelled at him you never made slightest attempt to get rid of him. You always meant to keep him for yourself, you sick freak! You only took advantage of him because he took pity on an asshole like you! But you were wrong to come across him. I should have interfered sooner. I’ve had enough of the stupid mess you’ve made out of him! Hell, it serves you right he finally got rid of you! You don’t deserve him… and he deserves better than someone as low as you.”

 

Sakurai didn’t know where to place his eyes, feeling utterly stripped of his words. But Nino’s damage had been done, and seeing the lack of response from the other, he resolved it was a waste of his time to expect anything more from someone so pathetic.

 

Nino walked out of the office not a second later, but before he could completely escape, he felt Ohno trailing close behind him, calling his name tirelessly.

 

“Nino, stop!” It’s not until they reached the elevators that Ohno pulls him by his arm.

 

“Let me go!” Nino furiously pushed Ohno away. “Leave me alone! I don’t want to see you!”

 

“Nino, calm down-!”

 

“I don’t want to hear that from you! Hell, how am I supposed to believe you didn’t have anything to do with this!?” Nino spat at him, taking Ohno aback.

 

“Nino… what are you saying?”

 

“Swear to me…” Nino’s voice cracked as he stared into the other’s eyes. “Swear you didn’t know about what he was doing! Swear you did anything to stop it! Swear to me you never got involved…”

 

Ohno held himself back, unable to find the honesty Ninomiya asked from him and realized he was cornered against a wall.

 

After not receiving his answer, Nino’s tears had begun to stream, causing him to look away as to not be caught drying them with the sleeve of his shirt.

 

“I can’t do this anymore…” Nino wept. “It’s over.”

 

Ohno’s heart sunk. His mind was blank, baffled by the words he struggled take in. “Don’t say that…” Ohno implored weakly, but Nino refused to look at him again. “Please, Nino...”

 

“I don’t want to see you again.” Nino finally said, turning his back to the other and getting into the empty elevator. Ohno wished he could have said something before his voice had stopped working. It was not until its doors closed on him that Ohno became conscious that Ninomiya’s words would be the last he’d hear from him.

 

Ninomiya hadn’t even chosen a floor when he was drowned in a violent sob. But he couldn’t take the pulsing pain in his chest that made him sink to the floor as he tried to muffle the tears under his hand. And he hated it. He hated all of them, but he hated himself the most for allowing the smallest sentiment to get to him in such a way.

 

~

 

No matter how much Sakurai thought Ohno would come through the door with that tense look he always threw at him and another protest on how much he had been right, Ohno simply did not return. And the more he delayed, the more Sakurai worried something must have gone wrong. He felt a responsibility to look for his secretary, but Sakurai wouldn’t dare leave his office, not because of the new obvious coffee stain drenching his clothes or how it wet his hair, but of not being able to tell if he would cross paths with Aiba Masaki if he did.

 

He was already informed by Ohno of Aiba’s absence, but he had no way of knowing if he would’ve decided to come in at the last minute. And Sakurai didn’t have the courage to take the chance of running into him, so he could only hide.

 

He sat back down at his desk, contemplating the mess of coffee stains and papers, having no choice but to accept their loss. At a time like this, he no longer had the ability to feel anger. He could only be thankful the drink hadn’t been boiling when Ninomiya decided to empty it on him, as he expected no less from Aiba’s close friend.

 

Ninomiya was right. All this time Sakurai had allowed himself to get closer to Aiba, he had turned weak. When he decided to become someone else, when he never had the guts to let himself be seen, and even in the very beginning when he’d made the mistake of falling for someone like Aiba Masaki. He’d always known it was wrong and he had made himself believe he tried everything to forget him, but only now he could admit he’d been taking advantage of his authority to make it so he never did forget.

 

Sakurai’s head sunk back into his chair with a loud sigh. He was overthinking things again and he wished everything would quiet down. He couldn’t reason with himself for a moment or think straight. He wished he could escape from all of it. Yet, even his only escape, his phone, which sat in a corner of his desk, was no use to him now, as he was unable to go to the only person who would make him find himself again.

 

He was mad, because there was nothing he could do but continue being the coward behind his phone. And he was unable to summon the courage to come before whom he confessed his love to, as he almost did before when he met him that late night in his office. When they sat across each other with piles of work between them and the words they exchanged flowed as freely as their texting. That one time he could feel at ease beside him and gaze at him without worrying about being caught. When there were no barriers in between or masks to hide behind. All he’d made him feel that night, which now he’d given up on ever finding again.

 

Although there were many other occasions he’d come to dread never stepping up to him before, since the day he’d come into his life for the first time and Sakurai couldn’t do anything about it than to fall victim to it. He remembered him ever since the moment he walked in for his interview and was forced to impress his superiors and himself, only Sakurai had already been captivated with his eagerness, the sincerity in his voice, his humble approach and his warming smile which disappeared by the end, when the remarks of a member of the board had taken it away from Aiba’s lips.

 

“Those idiots,” Sakurai commented loudly when they had taken and intermission from the interviews to have their lunch and he reunited with Ohno. “They think experience falls down from the sky when they should be giving opportunities to beginners trying to get their shot.” And it bothered him that through that time none of them had seen in Aiba an inch of what he’d made him feel.

 

And while he ranted when he was in Ohno’s company, his words were cut short as he spotted the subject of his worries. The younger had been walking distractedly with a fallen look causing the smallest collision of their shoulders as they crossed paths, gaining a deep apology from Aiba. Sakurai would have told him not to mind it, but he’d forgotten how to make use of his voice due to the other’s proximity. After several bows, Aiba walked away, feeding the distance between them, but Sakurai’s eyes still followed him distractedly until he’d forgotten the reason of why he’d stopped walking.

 

Then it was the nerve of the members of the board with their complaints, asking if it was even worth the bother to consider Aiba’s résumé. And right before his papers were thrown aside by the others, he had to raise his voice to speak some sense into them and explain why they would be making a mistake for not considering his thorough preparation.

 

“Well, as I believe most of us can agree, you seem to have a clear opinion about it, so why don’t you take him into your department? I’m sure he’ll do well if he can demonstrate what you’ve told us.” It was one member of the board who told him, the same one who’d made a blunt comment during the interview and had left Aiba speechless.

 

And Sakurai had to take his own word to heart, hoping he’d made the right thing as he placed Aiba’s papers into his approved candidates. Something in his chest had begun to throb he had to ask for a break the next moment.

 

But none of that could compare to the first time Aiba walked onto the floor. Among a handful of new employees, he always stood out from the rest. He always glistened in colors while the rest of the world remained in gray. But Sakurai had made the decision right then that if he was going to be his boss, there was nothing more he could be, and his decision was made so that he would never look at Aiba the same way again, not while they remained under the same roof.

 

Those were the lies he’d convinced himself to believe, and they turned into his burden with the years, as Aiba became the person he yearned to be with. Then came his own denial, as he had to watch Aiba fall short of the expectations of his superiors. Left with low remarks in his evaluations, Sakurai was bound to bargain with their judgement about his potentials while at the same time he made himself indifferent in front of Aiba. Sakurai carried a feeling much like responsibility when it came to him. And regardless of how many had come and gone, Sakurai only had to make sure Aiba would remain. As this carried over the years, Sakurai wondered if it ever was because he was trying to prove himself something or if Aiba could have really done it on his own, without his interference.

 

Each time this thought would cross his mind, he would brush it off with the delusion that he’d not harmed anyone with his decisions. And he did it again, and again, until he crossed that line when he sent Aiba that first message. And the more he received Aiba’s response, the less he had to lie to himself anymore. For the first time, he allowed himself to feel regret for ever holding back his feelings and he knew very well it would never be the same. Now, he’d fallen so deep, he couldn’t find the end to his fall.

 

It became an obsession, an impulse to get his attention, because what was the worst that could happen? As long as Aiba didn’t know, there was no reason to stop.

 

“This is… bad,” Ohno had told him once. “Sho, if any of this gets out, you have any idea of the consequences that would imply?”

 

“He doesn’t need to know.” Sakurai had responded him, his gaze barely leaving his phone where their conversation once seemed never ending. “He doesn’t need to know.” He couldn’t tell the times he’d repeated it, and even less the times he’d truly meant it.

 

Even when he had to go against Aiba’s persuasion for the truth and the possibility of not having to run away anymore, he would not let it end. No matter how much he was hurting Aiba, Sakurai simply could not phantom the moment Aiba would realize his disappointment and the mistake for ever getting involved with someone who wouldn’t even give him their name. But the damaged was made and there was no way of reverting it now. It was his own fault, after all, for falling in love with someone so out of his reach and for pretending he could someday have Aiba love him back.

 

~

 

_‘you are and odiot’_

_‘ure an idiot an a jerkrk’_

_‘Aiba?’_

_‘yo re a complete isiot’_

_‘What’s going on?’_

_‘you hab mo reason to be tecting me’_

_‘Aiba, what are you doing?’_

_‘Ican do as i please stop hotherin me’_

_‘You’re drunk.’_

_‘Is that why you’re texting me?’_

_‘i sont care wht yu think ou lisen to me’_

_‘anon is my frend yu cant tke him way from e’_

_‘he ljkes me gnuinely and i owe hm so mch’_

_‘i don wnt to lose hm to u i ont cae if yu ae mu bosss’_

_‘Aiba… I don’t understand.’_

_‘I ont need uou to undrstad me no!  
 i need anon I need non.’_

_‘aon i need uu’_

_‘...’_

_‘I can’t lie to you anymore.’_

_‘i ont care lie to e do whtver uou wan’_

_‘I jus need t know if he st ill ther’_

_‘i dnt ant to tink abut u anmore’_

_‘an d i m so tred i want t go hom’_

_‘You should call Nino.’_

_‘Tell him where you are and let him take you home.’_

_‘he dosnt cae.’_

_‘he hates me bcuse of u and I onlu kep hurtin him’_

_‘i wishe h stopped makin imslf miderable because f me’_

_‘and he was s stupid brekin up wih onho’_

_‘non! Wy do yu keep ingnoring me!’_

_‘I can’t do this.’_

_‘no you ont want to beceuse youe shmed of me’_

_‘well guss wat im ashame of uou too.because of u i lost mu firens.  
 how m i upposed t billieve i kess my boss!!?!’_

_‘Aiba, stop texting me.’_

_‘stp?? why shoulf i listn to you? You never stoppp when i asked u..  
U mae stupi d xcuses and I blived you.’_

_‘Please, just go home.’_

_‘NO. Im gong to wiat for anon am u cnat make me!’_

_‘Boss or whatwvwr.’_

_‘Don’t make me do this.’_

_‘ha!! Wha did yu eve do fr me?’_

_‘you mever cared f hw i felt.  
Yu never concdered m feeligns!’_

_‘Bosy arrongt isot!’_

_‘just leve me alon’_

_‘…’_

_‘Anoon!’_

_‘wann go hom’_

_‘Give me your location.’_

_‘not untl anon coms’_

_‘i wnt to se anon’_

_‘i need to talk’_

_‘I can’t go until you tell me where you are.’_

_‘Fien’_

_‘Itanubahr’_

_‘You have to make a better effort.’_

_‘O Ta NI bAR!’_

_‘Thank you.’_

_‘Don’t move, I won’t take long.’_

_‘Anon lease i nee to se u’_

_‘i ned yu I need u’_

The messages kept arriving to his phone as Sakurai hurried down the busy street to the bar near their company building. As each word became less comprehensible his worry only increased until the arrival of new notifications to his phone stopped all together. He wrestled with the thought of Aiba passing out at the bar or perhaps being kicked out and left stranded on a nearby street. He knew he needed to hurry.

 

He arrived at the busy establishment and instantly spotted a body passed out on one of the bar’s stools, his head collapsed over the counter with an uncertain number of empty glasses around him. Sakurai hurried past the chattering and cigarette smoke to get to him.

 

“Aiba… Aiba wake up!” Sakurai pleaded, managing to get Aiba to peek his head from between his arms, glancing at the other sleepily and a little disoriented.

 

“Anon…?” Aiba manages to mumble when his sight fixes on the other and his expression transforms into a pout. “You’re not Anon...”

 

Sakurai swallows harshly. “Aiba, please, you have to go home.”

 

“I won’t!” A very drunk and lucid Aiba snapped back.

 

“I’m not leaving you here.”

 

“I don’t care! I don’t want to see you…” Aiba’s voice trails off.

 

“Please… I don’t want to do this here.”

 

“Then where!? At the office?”

 

Sakurai can feel his chest beginning to clench and a long minute takes away his words. He can’t think straight anymore and the mess of what Aiba had become still lays in front of him. And to think it was all his fault…

 

“Hey… Hey!” the voice of a bartender is what brings Sakurai back to his senses. “Your friend there still owes me for those drinks.”

 

Sakurai finds himself lost before he internalizes what he was asked for, and therefore begins searching for his wallet.

 

“He’s not my friend…” Sakurai could hear Aiba mumble under his breath and it became hard to ignore as Sakurai handed the bartender Aiba’s payment.

 

“I’ve warned you,” Sakurai says to Aiba. “You’re going to make me use force.”

 

Aiba whines loudly before Sakurai is pulling him up from his stool and holds him from under his arm. His weight falls numbly over Sakurai for a few seconds before Aiba regains his sense again and fights Sakurai’s grip away.

 

“No! Let me go! I don’t’ want to go!” His loud tantrum is picked up from all sides of the establishment.

 

“Aiba, you’re making a scene!” Sakurai tries to shush him, before Aiba frees himself from his grip with a clumsy push.

 

“And what about you? What the hell is your deal!?” Aiba argued in a clumsily shaky voice, singling out the older. “You hated me! You pushed me around, you made me fear you and made me think it was respect! You’re my boss! How should I believe all this time I was looking up to a coward?”

 

“Aiba-”

 

“You hurt Jun! All this time you disagreed with him, not because you despised him, he never did anything wrong, it was you! You were jealous of him! You were jealous he had the courage you never had! And you pretended to be someone else and blamed me for not recognizing you sooner. But how was I supposed to know? You hated me! Why should I have trusted you? Why did you make me trust you?” Aiba’s fists land weakly and repeatedly over Sakurai’s chest. “You were supposed to hate me, so why? Why did you hide from me this way?” The drunk one had run out of breath, his voice drowned on the tears his state provoked. Making himself dizzy, his feet could barely hold up his body and his head leans on Sakurai’s shoulder. “Why… Why did you make me love you?”

 

While his last words were softly spoken, the chatter of the establishment continued, but Sakurai remained paralyzed. While the other’s weight leaned on him, he had no other choice than support him carefully enough as to touch him in the least amount possible. The contact of their bodies was wrong, no matter what Aiba may have said, as delirious as he was. Sakurai could only wait for the other to allow him to move them away, as he heard Aiba weeping next to his ear and hoped to disappear from the attention.

 

When Aiba’s weeping had toned done, Sakurai managed to convince him to help him walk him outside the establishment, this time without the tantrum he’d thrown before. Immediately out on the cold street, Sakurai calls for a cab while maneuvering Aiba’s weight on him and asking him to stay awake in vain as he’d grown heavier the more the cab delayed coming.

 

When an empty one finally pulls over, Sakurai helps the younger in first, securing him in his seat before he goes in himself from the opposite end of the car. When the driver asks for an address, Sakurai directs him to Aiba’s apartment.

 

“Director… how do you know my address?” Aiba asked drunkenly, his head leaning sleepily to the side of the window.

 

Sakurai looked at him, murmuring the words “Idiot,” under his breath. “Why did you have to get yourself drunk?”

 

During the quiet cab ride, Sakurai’s eyes were fixed on what was outside the window, as he was unable to fathom an explanation of what this night had been. He decided it would be more probable to not speak of it at all, and even less with the one on his side, who had seemed to find some peace in his sleep. Sakurai’s eyes began to relax due to the calming heater inside of the cab. He had almost given in to his exhaustion if it wasn’t for the sudden weight he felt on him after a sharp turn tossed them, causing Aiba’s head to lay conveniently on Sakurai’s lap.

 

Sakurai is immediately shaken by the unprecedented gesture and freezes. “Aiba… wake up,” Sakurai shakes the unconscious Aiba, but he appears to have fallen like a log. “You shouldn’t be…” Sakurai’s words cut short, seeing they had gained even the driver’s attention from the rearview mirror. “You have to sit up!”

 

Aiba groans in response, fixing himself into a much more comfortable spot on Sakurai’s thigh making it clear to the other he would not be moving away. Sakurai sighs, wondering why he was still trying at this point. He returns to the window to try and stay awake this time when he heard Aiba mumble. “Smells… like coffee.”

 

The last thing he needed was the reminder of Ninomiya wanting him dead, but he tried not to ponder on it. Aiba wasn’t in his right mind nor did Sakurai feel the urge to tell him why the smell was printed on his clothes. There was still a long ride ahead to Aiba’s apartment, and he wished he could convince him to sleep in the meantime.

 

For a moment Sakurai’s attention fixes on Aiba’s head, his brown and straight hair falling over his face. His hands felt the urge to brush it away, but he needs to hold himself back. _It’s wrong_ , he tells himself again. And no matter how long the ride became, he couldn’t bring himself to touch him.

 

~

 

When the cab finally drops them off by Aiba’s apartment building, Sakurai had found it best to carry Aiba on his back all the way up to his door step. Finding the keys to his front door was another complication as he reached for Aiba’s pockets and tried to not lose his balance. Luckily, they were hidden safely in his coat and Sakurai was thankful there was not much searching to do.

 

Coming into Aiba’s apartment seemed almost familiar, taking off his shoes by the entrance and making his way past the living room, going straight to Aiba’s room, probably the only part of his apartment that still remained unknown to him.

 

Finally, he could let go of Aiba’s weight and let him collapse over the bed. The younger remained sound asleep, or at least he pretended to be, seeing that a smile drew on his face when he recognized the comfort and familiarity of his bed sheets. Sakurai didn’t want to delay himself any longer and began to move away before he notices he’d forgotten to take care of Aiba’s shoes.

 

He hesitates. Everything is telling him to let it go, but an impulse doesn’t allow him to leave the room. He unties each shoe carefully, and places them beside the foot of the bed when he feels a light tough pulling on his arm. Aiba had awaken and he struggled to gesture something Sakurai couldn’t understand.

 

“What is it?” Sakurai asked, but the younger refused to talk, pulling on his arm, and making Sho sit on the bed. Sakurai’s heart raced, feeling the younger’s eyes following his parted lips.

 

Aiba tugged on Sakurai’s clothes while his fingers played with the buttons of Sakurai’s shirt. “Aiba…” Sakurai said warningly, but the younger shortened their distance, pulling Sakurai closer, allowing their lips to brush against each other.

 

“Aiba… we can’t…” Sakurai pulled back with each repeated peck of Aiba’s lips, feeling Aiba’s ragged breath against his mouth each time, but the younger’s strength forced him back on the mattress while Aiba ardently carved into his lips.

 

Pinned down by Aiba’s body, Sakurai knew he needed to make him stop, but Masaki had made it difficult to break free from his embrace and the enticing sensation of Aiba’s hot lips on his was almost torture. And when he thought he couldn’t feel any worse, Aiba moaned against his lips.

 

Gradually, Aiba’s hands slide down Sakurai’s body, pulling his tie loose and beginning to work awkwardly on the buttons of his shirt. The youngers lips began to trail clumsily from Sakurai’s lips to his jaw line and stopping at his neck while his hands explored the inside of Sakurai’s shirt.

 

“Anon…” His breathless voice calls him softly the slower his lips moved against Sakurai’s hot skin. Aiba repeated his pseudonym a few times, filling Sakurai with more guilt each time.

 

Eventually Sakurai felt Aiba’s body get heavier and his hands becoming still, right until Aiba’s lips couldn’t move any longer. He breathed profoundly against Sakurai’s neck when he finally entered sleep and his unconscious body laid over Sakurai’s immobile one.

 

Resting peacefully and inebriated over his chest, Sakurai realized what he’d done. His hand falls over his mouth to muffle a gasp that brought tears to his eyes. How selfish and stupid could he be? Since when had become such a detestable person?

 

“I’m sorry…” Sakurai uttered with a choked voice. “I’m so sorry…” It was all he repeated, muffling the sobs that came with his words, as he felt the younger’s body silently breathing against his and hated himself all over again.

 

~

 

Sakurai had managed to replace his body by placing a pillow under Aiba’s head before he moved away. He sat on the bed to button up his shirt again, thinking of putting an end to his recklessness for a last time. He simply couldn’t risk making such a stupid mistake again.

 

Taking Aiba’s blazer, which had fallen beside the bed, he finds Aiba’s cell phone. Hesitantly, he makes sure the younger was sound asleep before he unlocks his phone and goes into his contacts. He finds his own number under the name Anonymous. Searching under “details”, he found the “Delete Contact” option and pressed it without a second thought, along with the text and call history that remained in Aiba’s phone.

 

Sakurai placed the phone back on Aiba’s bedside table and left the room, but not without looking back at his peaceful body a last time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 10. Sorry I didn't warn you this chapter had a bed scene ^^' But we finally get to see into Sho's head. Did he made the right choice? What is he planning to do next? What does Aiba have to say in response to this? Thanks for reading~! Sadly we are nearing the end of this fanfiction.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 11 is here! What other decisions will Aiba have to face now? As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks and I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

 

Aiba Masaki stood in front of the private office. His hand tapped hesitatingly and almost inaudibly on the door. No response came from the other side, no matter how many times he knocked, and so he decided he had done enough waiting and he opened the door himself.

 

He came into the director’s office murmuring a small “Excuse me,” only to be welcomed by the absence of whom he waited to see. But he wasn’t surprised. After all, _he_ was never there when he most expected him to be.

 

Even in his disappointment, Aiba stepped inside and shut the door behind him, realizing he no longer felt anxious nor insecure going into that room. Carefully, he looked through the room as if he hadn’t really been able to take it in before, and he came close enough to observe _his_ messy desk. Immediately, it reminded him of that one night they had spent together working in that same spot. Just the thought of it made Aiba wonder how he must have made the other feel with just his presence, and why everything else couldn’t have been just like that moment.

 

His gaze followed his hand delicately gliding across _his_ desk, examining the objects scattered on it. A newspaper, a planner, his laptop, an assortment of pens, until he came across a lonely snow globe in the middle of the clutter. Masaki couldn’t help but pick it up to observe closely. Inside it was a palm tree with particles of snow floating around. Just underneath it _HAWAI’I_ was written in large letters. The object felt so out of place with the rest of his things it had managed to get the smallest smile out of Aiba, although he still regretted not seeing whom he really wanted to find.

 

His eyes kept looking everywhere as if he would somehow find _him_ there, when suddenly he fixed on a bottle toppled beside his empty and dirty coffee mug. It looked familiar at first glance and it felt wrong to look, but the tag around the pill bottle was hard to miss as its large, black letters gave away a prescription to an anti-depressant.

 

“What are you doing?” A voice coming from the door snapped, making Aiba jump. Ohno looked at him startled and almost angered, closing the door behind him hurriedly. “You’re not supposed to be here,” 

 

“Where is he?” Aiba quickly asked as to not lose time.

 

“You shouldn’t come in here without permission,” Ohno avoided his question.

 

“I need to see him. Where is he?”

 

Ohno sighed before moving towards Sakurai’s desk. “That is none of your concern.”

 

“You’re wrong, Ohno,” Aiba followed the secretary with his gaze. “You know it’s too late for you to say that. How do you expect me not to worry?”

 

“Aiba, we don’t have time to do this right now. Believe me… you don’t want to.” Ohno continued scavenging for documents on Sakurai’s desk as he tried to ignore the younger.

 

“You were with him all this time, right? You knew about us.” Aiba said, but Ohno pretended not to listen. “You lied. Is that why Nino is so upset with you?”

 

“What do you want me to say?” Ohno snapped at him, his anger getting the best of him. “Of course, I knew! I tried to convince him many times not to get close to you, but... When you both started texting I realized it was too late. He was so obsessed, and I wasn’t even capable of stopping him from doing something so stupid. And... honestly, part of me didn’t want to. At least… he seemed like himself while it lasted.”

 

Ohno sighed deeply, his shoulders slouching tiredly as his eyes filled with concern.

 

“I’m sorry,” Aiba said, regretting his words. “I know I cause you a lot of trouble…”

 

“Not as much as he caused himself.” Ohno responded.

 

“All this time… He spoke to me as if he were a whole other person, talking about the director… He even spoke badly of himself before... And I’m starting to think it was not just a way to fool me.”

 

“He would have said anything to please you.”

 

“But he meant it... didn’t he? Why would he harm himself that way?’

 

“I know it’s hard to believe but, he was in his best state whenever he spoke with you.” Ohno’s words didn’t settle well with Aiba.

 

“I’m… afraid. I’ve been beating myself up all this time, trying to figure out why I never saw it sooner and it makes me mad to think… he was there all along… but I guess it’s not something I wanted to see. For a moment, I came to wonder if… me being here was of my own doing and not because… of him.”

 

“I think you should ask him that yourself.”

 

“Then please, let me see him. If I could just talk with him-”

 

“I don’t’ think you should see him right now.” Ohno walked to the door while Aiba followed.

 

“Why? Because I’ll be in the way? If you’re so worried about him, why are you letting him cower away?”

 

Ohno stopped in his tracks at turned to the younger. “Aiba, you have to trust me-.”

 

“Give me one good reason I should.”

 

Ohno opened his mouth before closing it again. He struggled with himself before his hand reached for his blazer’s pocket, producing a folded piece of paper he handed to Aiba.

 

“I didn’t want to do this to you, but you leave me no choice.”

 

Aiba looked at the paper and back at Ohno before accepting it. A bad feeling grew in his stomach as he unfolded it, and he froze the second his eyes lay on the picture. A low gasp escaped his lips. It had to be a lie. He looked through it many times to confirm it and was only confused more when he couldn’t prove it wrong.

 

“It was faxed in this morning from an unknown address. They delivered it to every floor in the company. The board immediately ordered them to be recollected but it’s been spreading fast. The only place they didn’t sent it to was this office.” Said Ohno.

 

Aiba couldn’t turn his sight away from the picture. It was dark, clearly taken at night with just the right illumination to show director Sakurai helping someone into a cab. The face of who he carried was completely blurred and there was no way of telling who it was or what was going on, which only made it easier to infer what the scene portrayed. The text in bolded letters under the picture described the scandalous image of the director’s supposed private life.

 

‘ ** _HEAD OF OFFICE SLEEPING WITH EMPLOYEES. AFTER A DRUNK NIGHT OUT, THEIR ESCAPADE!’_**

****

“The boards been looking into this all morning and they think it was someone from our office,” Ohno added, as Aiba remained speechless. “They’ve been interrogating Sakurai since he came in this morning and they probably won’t let him come into the office. It won’t be long before they come here themselves.”

 

The more Aiba looked at the photo, the harder his gaze became, not studying the faceless identity which he recognized as himself in the picture, but at Sakurai carrying him into that cab as the fragments of that night came back to him. But if there was anything that infuriated him more it was knowing who had taken that picture.

 

“Aiba, listen to me. I don’t want to interfere between you two, but this concerns you just as much, whether you like it or not. I need to warn you, this is out of my hands as well as Sakurai’s, but one thing I know for sure is that you can’t be acting recklessly now. So please, promise me you won’t look for him!”

 

“When was he planning to come and tell me this?”

 

“He didn’t want me to show it to you… but it was wrong of me not to warn you before you found it yourself. Sakurai is not going to have much of a choice but to give the board your name. They’re going to ask to meet with you by the end of this week to interrogate you about this. At least you can rest assured Sakurai made the board agree everything will be undisclosed, so your name shouldn’t be mentioned beyond that meeting. The least you could do is not give yourself away so easily. If you value your job, no one should know about this. Lastly, when the time comes for them to interrogate you, you must make sure you answer everything they ask from you. And no matter what, you must blame it all on Sakurai.”

 

“…What?” Aiba asked shaken by Ohno’s suggestion.

 

“It’s the best we can do-”

 

“What makes you think that? When the board comes to decide, it’ll be stupid if they don’t choose their person of interest, and that is obviously not me.”

 

“That won’t happen.” Ohno answered. “If there is anything Sakurai is willing to put before himself it’s you.”

 

“What do you mean?” Aiba responded in disbelief. “What is he going to do?”

 

“You don’t have a choice. If you want to keep your job, you must let them know you were only a victim.”

 

Aiba was trying to understand what Sakurai intended to do, but he refused to think Sakurai would give himself away so easily. “Tell me… if I lie to save myself, would I even deserve to keep my job?”

 

“If you haven’t noticed, we’re running out of choices here, Aiba.”

 

“Then I just have to play stupid? Thank you, Ohno, I appreciate your advice, but I’m perfectly capable of admitting what I got myself into. He may not notice it, but all this time, I’ve only been trying to help him. I’m not going to become part of a lie just to tear him apart! I won’t betray him.” Aiba said, walking past Ohno and heading to the door first.

 

“Aiba, he is not going to agree with this!”

 

Aiba stopped, his hand holding firmly on the door knob. “Tell him you couldn’t change my mind and if he doesn’t like it, tell him to come up to me and say it himself.” With those last words, Aiba stormed out the room.

 

~

 

That night, when Masaki dined with Nino at their usual place, neither of them wanted to speak a word. Nino stared distractedly at his food, almost forgetting that Masaki was there, but Masaki couldn’t blame him as he didn’t have anything worth saying either. Moreover, he didn’t think Nino was ready to hear about the scandal that had been set loose on their company, nor did he think himself capable of explaining the picture that involved him and his boss.

 

“We should have gone home…” Aiba said with a sigh almost to himself. Nino looked up at him momentarily.

 

“Bad day?” Nino asked.

 

“I don’t think I have good days anymore, but it’ll get worse.”

 

“I’m guessing missing work didn’t help at all?”

 

“No… I think I just complicated things even more.”

 

“Between you two?” Nino asked, knowing Aiba wanted to avoid his name.

 

“Yes…”

 

“So, you didn’t see him?” Nino asked and the older just shook his head.

 

“He’s avoiding me... when I need him the most. I’m just trying to know for sure if following him is even worth the trouble, but… I don’t know why I even bother.”

 

 

Ninomiya saw the dueling feelings his friend wrestled with, although he decided it was not fair for him to say. “Maybe he’s scared,” He said instead. “Has he not always been?”

 

“He _is_ sacred, just not for the reasons I thought he was.”

 

“Does that mean you can forgive him for it?” Nino asked, but Aiba didn’t know how to answer.

 

“I don’t know what to do. I think I want to talk to him, but I have no idea of what I want to say if I do. And if things keep going this way in the office, I don’t think I’ll have much of a choice but to stop trying altogether. I know I’ve been waiting to get fired all this time but, maybe it was me who should have quit a long time ago,” said Aiba. “It would have saved them the trouble anyways.”

 

“Maybe I should too.” Nino suddenly added, his words more surprising than Aiba’s. “Unlike you, I don’t think I’ll lose anything if I did.”

 

Aiba’s eyes widen, taken aback by the younger’s words. “You mean that?” he asked, but Nino only shrugged. “I mean… I’m not against you quitting at all, I actually think you should start your own career but… Ohno?” Aiba asked and Nino looked elsewhere. “Wouldn’t you lose him?”

 

Nino found that the words were hard to come across, but he finally answered. “I don’t think he would notice.”

 

“You haven’t spoken to him?” Aiba asked. Nino shook his head with a hard look.

 

“I told him I didn’t want to see him… So far, he’s been doing a great job.” Nino’s eyes glistened.

 

“I’m sorry,” It was all Aiba could say.

 

“You must have talked to him today, no?” Nino asked.

 

“I did. But he has too much on his shoulders. We only argued.”

 

“He didn’t even ask… about…?” Nino couldn’t finish his sentence, but Aiba understood him nonetheless.

 

“I mentioned you once and he snapped at me. I’m sure he’s thinking about you, there is just too much on his mind,” Aiba tried to justify it but the more he tried to convince the other, the less it worked.

 

“I tried texting him the other night,” Nino added avoiding Aiba’s gaze. “I sent him texts all night like an idiot. He didn’t even open them… That jerk. Why does he always… always do what I say?” The younger harshly bit his lower lip.

 

“Nino, he’ll come around.”

 

Nino shook his head. “He’s had quite enough of me, I’m sure.” He exhaled sharply, not giving in to the water pooling in his eyes. “And I had to be stupid enough to say that.” He chuckled nervously, not giving a chance for Aiba to say something back. Aiba felt useless for not being able to hearten his friend, but Nino needed his lover more than Aiba at that moment.

 

“We should have gone home.” Nino sighed taking another sip from his cup before placing it loudly on their table. The rest of their meal continued in silence.

 

~

 

That night, Aiba insisted Nino should stay at his place as to not leave him go home by himself. It took some convincing, but Nino obliged and had fallen asleep on one side of Masaki’s bed shortly after their arrival. As he let Nino rest, Masaki opened his phone to look at his contacts once again, cursing to himself when he still couldn’t find Anonymous’ chat or even his contact information anywhere. He hated himself, wondering how he could have been so stupid to try and get rid of him in such a way. All of their conversations, all those written moments, gone, but why? He had wanted to talk to Anon most of all that night, so why would he try to get rid of him? Remembering how dear those memories were to him, Aiba didn’t know how he would ever forgive himself for doing such a thing.

 

~

 

Masaki was too late on realizing the chaos he would encounter that next morning in the office. The moment he came in in, he could tell what was on everyone’s minds as their conversations overlapped one another. Every time he walked past another group of his co-workers, there was always two words that stood out from the rest: “The director”. It was as if their sentences couldn’t continue any other way.

“I don’t expect the director would be coming in here today. He didn’t even show his face yesterday. Can you believe that?”

 

“Who knew we had someone as pathetic as the director as head of this office! Guess now we know his ego was just part of his big act!”

 

“I’ve been working for the director for who knows how long! What am I going tell my wife!?”

 

Aiba couldn’t stand it. His hands were closed in firm fists, trying to resist the urge of slamming them against his desk. He wanted to silence the whole room. But no matter what, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. This time he was not brave enough. Afraid of what this would mean for him, or even for _him._ He remembered Ohno’s words to not act so recklessly, but just the strength it took to keep that anger sealed in was exhausting.

 

The commotion of the floor died down to murmurs when the secretary was spotted walking in, yet as expected, he was all alone.

 

“Hey, Ohno!” An employee by the end of the room called out suddenly. “What is the meaning of this?”

 

“Isn’t Sakurai coming in?” Another employee closer to Aiba’s desk added.

 

“He’s not even going to make an apology, isn’t he?” A third voice added, before turmoil set loose amongst them.

 

Ohno had stop in his tracks to listen to what they had to express, but he did not back away. Instead he took in their rage and confusion as if it were his own.

 

“I will see that your complaints are delivered as they should,” Ohno didn’t even need to raise his voice for the rest of their voices to stop and listen to him. “In the meantime, I will appreciate if you would all return to work until further notice. If it’s anything urgent, you are welcome to send me an email and I will respond as soon as I can. I will inform you, nonetheless, that your work may seem interrupted momentarily this afternoon when management conducts its protocol interrogation with each of you,” There were complains heard across the room. “But right now, I will only ask for you to refrain yourselves from mentioning the director in a derogatory manner inside of this office. And while he is away, you will refer to me as ‘manager’ or ‘sir’ when you address me. If you still refuse to meet with these conditions, I recommend you show yourselves to the nearest exit.” Ohno walked out, harshly shutting the door to the private office as he’d left the floor of employees looking at one another, somehow feeling even more unsettled.

 

~

 

Everything began as Ohno had predicted it. Management sent down several of its officials into their conference room to conduct an interrogation of the employees on their floor. Although everyone had protested at first, now they cooperated to get things over with as soon as possible. It was expected for the interrogations to take more than a day to complete. Moreover, many suspected an email inspection was taking place simultaneously which only helped to feed Aiba’s apprehension as he waited to be called upon.

 

In the middle of that uncertainty, Masaki received a new email. It was from the company’s board, an address Aiba certainly never expected to receive an email from.

 

Along its lines, the note informed him of a meeting that had been arranged with the leaders of the board later that same day for an important conference to which they compelled him to attend. For this reason, they had decided to exclude him from the interrogations being conducted in his own office. Their meeting was to take place after office hours and it was to be kept solely between them, assuring him he would face severe consequences if he broke that condition. The email was signed off with a formal farewell by the second head of the board himself.

 

Aiba could already feel his palms sweating. Even when he had moved out from the office to look through the email over again, the fresh air of the terrace didn’t do much work to help his restiveness. According to their note, it only left him with a few hours to think about what he would do when he presented himself in front of the board, whom he thought of as far more threatening than Sakurai.

 

Aiba wasn’t too sure himself he even knew what they would ask from him. Ohno’s suggestion to lie was the last thing he would’ve thought of doing, so there was no other choice but telling the truth. But how much was he allowed to say? How could he be so sure that _he_ had confessed everything to them? And what could Masaki even say about them if he wasn’t sure of the status of their relationship anymore?

 

Aiba felt lost again, when the answers he initially intended to find were just not a possibility anymore. Now, when he needed to hear _him_ more than ever it was almost as if everything were preventing them from seeing each other again. And Masaki hated that he understood why he had to stay away, and he hated even more how _he_ always managed to get away from him, but most of all, Masaki hated it was always him who was chasing after the other without a chance of reaching them.

 

Aiba wanted to close his eyes and forget about the day that was still left ahead. If only he could stay at the terrace and escape from his work to catch up on the sleep that had been neglecting him, maybe it would bring back the energy he needed to head back into the office. If only…

 

“Aiba?”

 

A gentle voice had jolted Aiba from his daze. His eyes widened to find Jun observing him closely.

 

“Jun…”

 

“Sorry, did I startle you?” Matsumoto said apologetically.

 

“N-No, I just… W-What are you doing here?” Aiba tried to look as awake as possible.

 

“I was just passing by,” Jun signals with his head a group of people behind them, engaged in chatter by a far side of the terrace. “They’re from my department, we just came out from a meeting and thought we’d get something to eat. Are you… on a lunch break right now?” Jun glanced at his watch.

 

“N-No, I… sort of sneaked out a little earlier, that’s all.” Aiba’s mind wondered elsewhere, not really wanting to talk as he could barely follow the younger’s words.

 

Jun nodded. He glanced a last time towards the group of people whom hadn’t even acknowledged his absence before he finally decided to sit next to Aiba on the bench. Just by feeling him coming closer, Aiba grew nervous.

 

“I bet you’re tired.” Jun began. “Been busy lately?”

 

Aiba avoided Jun’s eyes and fixed on the ground instead. “Yeah...”

 

“And the office? How are you holding up?”

 

“As usual…”

 

“I hear it’s a total mess over there with what’s been going around about… you know. It was quite a shock, even for me. But… I don’t think I expected any less from him.” Aiba shut his eyes. He did not want to hear this, and even less coming from Matsumoto.

 

“How’s your work?” Aiba quickly changed subjects, trying to hide the waver in his voice.

 

“It’s okay, not as exciting as yours I suppose,” said Jun, trying to lighten the mood but gradually realized he was only making it worse. He wished he could take his words back right after.

 

Jun waited for the other to say anything at all, but seeing how the silence only drew them apart, he understood perhaps he had spoken out of place. “I’m sorry.” Matsumoto said. “I would usually ask how you’ve been, but that’ll be stupid considering you’re clearly not okay. Is there… something you need to say?”

 

“Wouldn’t you rather be with your friends right now?” Aiba simply asked, afraid he would be forced to confess it all.

 

“I’m with them all day and I only get to see you by chance lately.”

 

“And you rather listen to whatever silly thing is bothering me?” Aiba said jokingly.

 

“Of course, I would.” Jun responded seriously. “Always.” His response reminded Aiba that Jun’s feelings were nothing to toy with. “I doubt it really is that silly, considering you’re feeling like this.”

 

Jun invited him to talk, but Aiba couldn’t do much but refuse. “I don’t think it’s all that important-”

 

“Lying doesn’t suit you, Aiba,” said Jun, not realizing how much he was pressuring the other. “Neither is looking so low.”

 

“Jun, I can’t do it.” Aiba confessed, trying to hide the guiltiness he felt. “I can’t talk about this with you.”

 

When he understood Aiba was not just avoiding his questions, Jun slowed down. The other could barely dissimulate the heaviness in his voice and it startled Jun to think it was something far more complicated than what he could handle himself, but it didn’t mean he would be backing down.

 

“You know… You can choose not to tell me anything, but that probably won’t get rid of me. After all you did for me… I can’t move away without at least trying to help you.”

 

“You don’t owe me anything, Jun.”

 

“You’re wrong.” The younger refuted. “You showed me it wasn’t wrong to fight for myself. That I could stand up for those I cared about. You made me realize that maybe it was not my mother who was afraid of being alone all this time… but me. That I didn’t want to go through this by myself… and I didn’t. Even if it was just during work, you were there for me too. You listened to me. You cared. And even though I hurt you, you forgave me nonetheless. You taught me to be true to myself. I understood what mattered the most for me. Even after being rejected I feel… like I gained a new strength just from knowing you. And there is nothing I would have wanted more.”

 

When Jun finally found Aiba’s red and puffy eyes, he felt enraged for whomever had caused Aiba to feel such way, but he tried not to let it get to him. Clearly, it was something Aiba cared about.

 

Jun left Aiba’s side on the bench to pace instead. “You don’t need to tell me what’s bothering you, but you should know, if you don’t want to talk about it with me because it involves that guy you like, that’s not important. This isn’t about me. I just want to be there for you as well.”

 

Aiba sighed heavily to drive his tears away. He nodded understandingly to Jun before looking for his voice to speak again. “He’s really selfish… that guy,” Aiba spoke carefully. “We’ve both been stupid, but he is being an idiot… asking me to lie. There must be another way but it’s just… I can’t see it. And… I don’t know what I should do.”

 

Something stung in Jun’s chest just by listening to the other, but he didn’t let it keep him from responding to Aiba. “No one else should decide what you want to do. You more than anyone should know what is right. So, what’s holding you back?”

 

“Probably… I’m making everything harder on myself.”

 

“Then, don’t. Instead of overthinking things, have you even thought of what you wanted?”

 

What he wanted. It was such a vague question that the answer was nowhere near clear for Aiba, but he appreciated Jun’s words deeply as it gave his concerns something to work with.

 

Aiba wiped his eyes. “I’m sorry…”

 

“No, don’t be. It’s okay to feel upset. Be mad if you need to. As long as you do something about it.”

 

Aiba looked up to his friend as he tried to offer him a gesture of gratitude, but Jun would have preferred for him not to force his smile.

 

In the middle of their silence, Masaki’s phone suddenly rang. Both glanced at the device announcing the arrival of a new message and Jun could only observe Aiba hesitation before looking at the name of the sender. A thousand thoughts crossed Aiba’s mind at once before he dared to look, but with a single glimpse at his phone, his anxiety eased.

 

Aiba sighed. “It’s Nino,” he said almost disappointedly. Still, Aiba read the new message.

 

 

_‘Come to the café. We need to talk.’_

“It sounds urgent,” Aiba said to Jun. “I should go.”

 

Seeing Aiba still so discouraged, Jun couldn’t help but feel inept for not being able to help him. But even he had to agree there was only so much he could hear. After all, Jun was not able to predict just how much it would pain him to know the truth Aiba chose to hide from him.

 

~

 

The café became crowded as lunch hours approached, and Nino waited for Aiba by an empty table. Yet, when Aiba was sat across from his friend, Ninomiya hesitated to come up with the right words. Aiba noticed the worry in his eyes and began to feel it himself.

 

“You must have heard… about the rumor.” Aiba inferred as to help him start.

 

Ninomiya’s brow rose. “You thought I wouldn’t hear?”

 

Aiba shook his head. “I didn’t know how to explain. I’m not sure what happened myself.” Nino sighed and Aiba was afraid he was upset. “Is that what you needed to talk to me about?”

 

“No,” he responded, unfortunately. “Although it’s not too far off.” Aiba leaned in, listening uneasily. “ _He_ came here… to the café.”

 

Aiba’s eyes widen. “What…?”

 

“Anon… He came to see me-”

 

“When?” Aiba quickly interrupted.

 

“That night before I met with you… and again this morning. I didn’t want to deal with him, so I told him to back off. He just kept insisting that I needed to hear him out, like he doesn’t know better…”

 

“Why would he go to you? Why didn’t he…” Aiba’s words are cut off as he cursed to himself. In his head, he only kept repeating he should have known.

 

“I suppose he came to me because he knew I would be harder to convince. But it’s not like I trust him any more now, it’s just…”

 

“He is hiding,” Aiba continued. “He doesn’t want to see me…”

 

“He is afraid to hurt you again.”

 

“No. He knows it’s too late for that…”

 

“Aiba…” Nino called him. “He’s going to quit.” His words provoked a small gasp from Aiba as everything he feared would happen started to align. “I don’t know why he wanted me to relay this to you, but he left me no choice. You needed to know. He said he would hand in his resignation letter before your meeting with the board. He hopes that can somehow influence in their final decision. I think… he is going to quit so you can keep your job.”

 

Aiba said nothing as it now made sense why Ohno had asked him to lie. He finally understood what Sakurai was trying to do, although Aiba couldn’t be so sure this was what he wanted. And even less, what either of them needed.

 

“I don’t think he wants you to interfere. And I sort of understand why. Though, I don’t know if I would’ve done the same,” said Ninomiya.

 

“What did you tell him?”

 

“I obviously questioned him, but he was convinced what he was doing was the right thing. I told him he would only be making you upset, but he didn’t listen. Said you would eventually understand. I sort of respected his decision after we talked, but… I can’t help but hate him for making you feel this way, without properly explaining to you why.”

 

“He won’t,” Aiba said. “He’s never been honest with me to begin with. Why should I expect anything from him now? It’s always me who must guess what he’s thinking. But he doesn’t realize… it was only just now that I understood who he was. Still… what made me think that was going to solve anything?”

 

Nino only wished he could say more to assure him it would be okay, but there was no reason for him to lie.

 

Aiba got up from his chair, pausing for a second as he thought of what he would do next. “I should be heading back. I don’t want to keep you for long.”

 

“Should I wait for you tonight?” Ninomiya asked.

 

Aiba thought about it for a long second before he looked back to his friend. “Don’t worry about me, you already have enough to deal with.” He responded to the younger to which Ninomiya could only nod, conveying him a silent “good luck” before he walked away.

 

~

 

The time finally approached when the rest of the employees began to leave one by one and the office emptied. Only a few remained last to finish their work before eventually they gathered their things and joined the rest in leaving the office, making Aiba wish he could do the same. Instead he was forced to wait another hour in the empty office, until Ohno would come down to inform him they were ready to see him.

 

He knew it wouldn’t be for long, but Ohno’s company gave him a sense of reassurance as they both waited for the elevator to come. Still, Aiba’s nerves were unsettling and his palms began sweating again the more the silence spread between them. Ohno must have seen through him, because the next second, he asked.

 

“How is he? Nino, I mean?” His question came so suddenly Aiba thought he may have mistaken what he said. “Is he… any better?”

 

“He’s been staying at my place.” Aiba answered. “I think it’s best if he’s not alone right now. I’m sorry… if that bothers you.”

 

Ohno shook his head. “I think he is better off with you. There is nothing I can say to fix it right now.” The vacant elevator arrived, and both men stepped in, one more hesitantly than the other. “He was right you know… I did help Sakurai. I did use him.”

 

“But you didn’t love him for that reason,” Aiba interjected. Ohno gave the younger his back, not giving Aiba a chance to read his expression and pretending to not have heard him. “He misses you, Ohno. He’s afraid he’s hurt you, that you won’t want to be with him again… That you hate him.”

 

“Isn’t that what he asked for?” Ohno suddenly said. “I’m merely doing what he said.”

 

“Then you’re a fool.”

 

The elevator ascended silently as they got closer to the top floors each second.

 

“… Does he really think I hate him?” Ohno asked.

 

“Ask him yourself. He’s been waiting for you all this time. Sending you messages you won’t even reply to.”

 

“You wouldn’t understand. He doesn’t simply display his feelings to anyone like he does with you. The moment I get too close, he’ll hide and I… I just don’t know what he really thinks of me…” Ohno said in a lower voice. “I guess I’ll simply never known...”

 

“Even if I knew, it wouldn’t be my place to say. But that’s just how he’s always been. He is complex and intimate. He never really admits what he feels even if he says otherwise. I guess… that’s all because of what he’s been through. But that doesn’t mean you can’t do anything. Sometimes… it’s your turn to reach out to them, as hard as it may seem.”

 

As Aiba had lost himself in a thought, he almost failed to notice Ohno’s sudden chuckle. “You know, this is stupid to say but… it’s been on my mind,” The elevator began to decelerate. “Lately, it seems like I’m only surrounded by people that love you. And, I’m not going to lie, it’s a real pain in the ass, but… you also make it hard for me to hate you.”

 

The elevator opened its doors to a large waiting area as the reception on the floor to the board’s office, which was down a narrow hall. Ohno held the doors to allow Aiba to step out and didn’t seem to have plans to follow him any further.

 

“This is as far as I’ll go.” Ohno said to him. “You’ll wait here until they allow you inside. Once you’re there… I hope you know what to do.”

 

Aiba observed him briefly before nodding in understanding, allowing Ohno to let go of the door and letting the elevator close on him.

 

Aiba grew restless with the thought of waiting for the moment he would be showed inside the board’s office. He hadn’t thought this much ahead into what he was going to do, because he was sick of thinking and meditating over every little thing. Perhaps it was better if he trusted in his instincts for once and decided on what he was going to do when the time came. After all, he didn’t know what they wanted from him.

 

When a young woman came up to Aiba, she asked him to follow her. Aiba stood from his seat shakily, drying his sweaty hands on his pants and straightening his tie before following her through a glass door.

 

Aiba had never come to this side of their company and he never thought he would ever find the necessity to. He began to question himself on what he had done and wondered if he knew it would have taken him this far, would he had dared to do it in the first place. But because there was so much he still didn’t understand he decided not to answer. In any case, he had already made his decision and there was no going back now.

 

The young woman opened the door for him and Aiba took a deep breath before he finally stepped inside. A vast room was spread before him with a long table in which several men were already sat at, in a manner that wasn’t exactly welcoming. The men chatted behind their large table, noticing Aiba’s presence in the room one by one. Aiba couldn’t stop and count them as his heart raced and the blood pumped in his ears, but they must have been at least seven of them. A framed picture of the company’s president hung behind the one who sat in the middle, so Aiba inferred he must be the head of the board.

 

Aiba was taken out of his thoughts when he heard the door close behind him and he swallowed hard when he realized all their eyes fell on him.

 

“Please take a seat, Mr. Aiba.” It was the man on the right side who spoke. The second in command, perhaps, and the one who wrote the email.

 

Aiba did as he was asked, excusing himself before he sat in the solitary chair in the middle of the room, dumping his things beside him. He sat straight as to make himself look more confident and tried hiding his shaking legs. It felt much like the first time he came in for an interview to the company, except there were different faces in the room and _he_ was not there among them.

 

“Please state your full name as well as your position in this company and your respective supervisor.” The man on the right ordered him.

 

Aiba exhaled and his voice came out fearful. “My name is Aiba Masaki. I work as an advisor under director… S-Sakurai Sho.”

 

“Mr. Aiba, you are aware the board has decided to keep this meeting in confidentiality to continue carrying this company’s best interests in order, so we ask you to do the same. In addition, and because of these conditions, you will not be granted complete liberty in the subject, meaning we are in no obligation to answer you. Is that clear?”

 

Aiba hesitated at first, not knowing what it would imply, yet he answered firmly. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Very well. We’ll begin right away then. Tell us, Mr. Aiba, you’ve been working in this company for five years, is that correct?”

 

“Y-Yes, sir.”

 

“And how many of those years exactly have you personally known director Sakurai?”

 

Aiba thought back on his chats and found it hard to believe there were things that qualified as ‘personally knowing the director’. “Four months.”

 

The secretary whom asked the question raised his sight to Aiba. “Months?” he verified.

 

“Yes, sir. I only came to know him 4 months ago.”

 

The members of the board exchanged looks. “And in this period, how regularly would you meet with director Sakurai?”

 

Aiba paused for a long moment. After realizing they all waited for him, Aiba had no choice but to answer. “Never… sir.”

 

The board leader, who spoke to him directly now, frowned at Aiba. “I’m sorry, would you give us a clear answer, Mr. Aiba.”

 

“Besides working together in the office and perhaps sharing an elevator a few times… we didn’t meet, sir. Not willingly at least...”

 

“What about our topic under evaluation? Can you confirm this is you along with director Sakurai?” The board member flailed the photograph in his hand for Aiba to see.

 

“Y-Yes, sir, that is-”

 

“So, you in fact confirm director Sakurai had asked for you to meet after office hours?”

 

“N-No, that was… He was only trying to help-”

 

“Mr. Aiba, would you report director Sakurai has, in any occasion, forced you into any situation?” A different member by the far left asked this time.

 

“What?”

 

“Has direct Sakurai approach you in a way that has made you feel anything but comfortable? Or perhaps could you describe it as suggestive behavior?”

 

“I-I’m sorry? What does this have to do with what we’re discussing?”

 

The members of the board exchange murmurs before they could return to the baffled man in the middle of the room.

 

“Mr. Aiba, we are only but helping you recollect your evidence. You must know a lawsuit must be contain facts as nothing should be left out,” said the head of the board this time.

 

“Lawsuit? For what?”

 

“Why, director Sakurai, of course. After your experience, it is only fair that we should file a formal lawsuit. We are merely helping you through the process.”

 

“I never said I was going to report.”

 

“That is understandable, Mr. Aiba, but please rest assured, because this meeting is confidential, the details of this lawsuit will not be disclosed to the director himself or anyone else who is not present.”

 

“I don’t think you’re understanding me, sir. I am not going to report.”

 

The head of the board paused briefly, taking off his glasses to stare at Masaki’s stern expression. “I’m sorry, Mr. Aiba, I must be misunderstanding-”

 

“You’re not, sir. With all due respect, I would appreciate if you didn’t make that decision for me.”

 

“Again, Mr. Aiba, we are only trying to help you-”

 

“I appreciate it, sir, but I don’t need it.”

 

The head of the board sighed before his attention was draw back to the papers in front of him.

 

“Very well,” The member by the right side carried on. “You’ve confirmed that you’ve shared an intimate relationship with director Sakurai over the course of 4 months, correct?”

 

“No.” Aiba responded firmly. “I said I came to know him 4 months ago. I didn’t say we were in any sort of relationship.”

 

“Has director Sakurai influenced you in any way to believe that?”

 

“No, and I think I’m capable of thinking for myself!”

 

“So, you deny you ever exchanged personal information amongst yourselves.”

 

Aiba hesitated. Was this really what they wanted to know? “No…”

 

“Then you must be aware of director Sakurai’s condition and the treatments he’s been receiving for the last several years.”

 

“Is this not a little too personal, sir?”

 

“We would appreciate if you would give us an honest answer, Mr. Aiba. Are you familiar with Sakurai’s history of mental diagnosis?”

 

Aiba’s hands closed into fists. “I am aware.”

 

“Would you say his behavior towards you is justified or related to his mental issue? In other words, would you describe his regular behavior as compulsive or obsessive, perhaps to a certain extent that has made you feel unsafe around your work place?”

 

“What are you getting at with this?”

 

“Please answer our question, Mr. Aiba. Would you describe his drug prescription to control this behavior as ‘ineffective’?”

 

“No.”

 

“No, it is not entirely effective?”

 

“No, I won’t answer your questions.”

 

The head of the board took word. “It is necessary that you cooperate so that we can get to a proper conclusion Mr. Aiba-”

 

“Conclusion? Conclusion of what? All you’re doing is talking down on Sakurai! Is that really what I was called here for?”

 

“May I remind you that if you refuse to cooperate-”

 

“I am cooperating, sir, at least to what is relevant. Otherwise, I didn’t agree on coming here and accusing Sakurai with these… these overstatements!”

 

“By denying a clear answer, are you agreeing with these facts and, as some may have described, his abuse of authority?”

 

“I’ve already explained myself, sir. I will not answer.”

 

“Mr. Aiba, we do not intend to start any sort of conflict with you. It is only fair on our part that we look through these faults to help your situation, in which case you’ve been most affected and could help as witness.”

 

“But-”

 

“We understand these circumstances have been much problematic to you more than anyone, but we assure you, you carry no fault here.”

 

“What do you mean? Who has decided that?”

 

“It is not our obligation to answer, but in order for you to keep your position in this company, it is imminent for someone else to assume responsibility for harming our image.”

 

Aiba knew. He understood clearly what was going on now. Even so, he wanted to hear it for himself. “And who, under the board’s criteria, should take that responsibility?”

 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Aiba, it is not our obligation to answer. For this meeting’s best interest, they must remain anonymous.”

 

Aiba understood now how far they were willing to go, how they would not stop until they were pleased. In that moment he found something within himself as well. That it was not confusion he had been feeling all this time, nor was he feeling saddened or upset. He was angry. That same anger he was unable to show Sakurai as he kept running away from him, he now felt towards the members of the board, as they kept coming at him with lies he understood were part of some bigger hate. But now he knew how to express what he’d been keeping to himself all this time.

 

“Is there anything else you would like to state?” The head of the board asked. And as Aiba looked upon the men behind their table, he understood what he had to do.

 

“Yes.”

 

The members of the board pause as they were clearly not expecting Aiba’s answer. “Very well,” They invited him to talk, but Aiba took his time before the proper words reached him.

 

“I don’t understand how Sakurai would have fallen for your manipulations. But now I know he wanted to quit in my stead, because he probably didn’t want me to deal with all of you.”

 

“Excuse me-”

 

“I’m not done,” Aiba interrupted him immediately. “I may not understand why you’re all against him but, you can’t expect me to sit here are listen to you making up these lies to degrade him. And I’m sorry if you can’t accept you’re wrong about him, but if you really knew who he was… If you truly knew him as I’ve known him… you wouldn’t be trying to convince me by putting words in my mouth. Considering you’re the face of this company, that leaves a lot to say about you. You’ve judged me wrongly if you thought I would be so stupid as to betray him. Sakurai… he is my friend… And even though he’s lied to me, he’s cared for me all this time. It’s only fair that I do something for him as well.”

 

Aiba took a deep breath. Seeing they gave him the space to talk, he continued without a second thought. “Haven’t you even thought of studying that photograph you’re holding?” Aiba asked. “Has it really not occurred to you to ask who took that picture?”

 

The head of the board squinted his eyes at Aiba. “And how do you expect us to know?”

 

“You wouldn’t know, because you don’t want to see it… But I may be able to tell.” The attention of all the members was granted to him. “I know who was following us that night. I knew the second I saw it, but I was afraid… that I were betraying a friend if I said something. I realized that didn’t mean anything now since he clearly did nothing for me by taking that photograph. But at least I know for sure it wasn’t just him. There were others, a group of them, I can’t exactly say how many, but they worked together. Sakurai’s ex-employees, the ones he fired himself. It explains why this was directed at him. But this wasn’t the first time, the elevator as well. Because I got stuck in Sakurai’s stead, they decided to approach me, asking for my help for their next attack on Sakurai. But I refused to betray him. I suppose they suspected… That I’ve always been a bit too forgiving when it came to Sakurai. I guess… I hadn’t even noticed it before but… it may be true…”

 

Aiba’s voice lowered as he approached the end of his thoughts. He found himself against an answer he hadn’t seen before, yet he understood it had always been there. When he found himself again inside that room, he realized he was still granted the silence of the board, as if they waited for him to finish, but there was nothing else to mention that would be worth for them to hear.

 

“That is all I’ll say.” Aiba finished.

 

~

 

A side of the room was already piled with boxes. With his papers put away and his belongings set aside, his desk finally looked arranged for once. His office became empty, compared to the rest of the deserted floor at the late hours of the night. A silence spread through the room as he contemplated his office all alone. It was the first time in what seemed like such a while that he could come into his office in peace, yet it was also the last time he would be able to do so.

 

The lights across the office had already been turned off, expecting no one to come in, yet the familiar sound of the elevator coming up to the floor emerged down the hall. This was not enough to alarm him, as he could recognize the footsteps that came up behind him shortly after. He expected no one else.

 

“You’re still around?” Sakurai asked as Ohno stood by the door of what was no longer his office.

 

“They asked me to stay until the meeting was over.” Ohno responded.

 

“I see,” Sakurai continued putting things away as Ohno received his friend’s inexpressive words in return. “It must have finished late, then.”

 

“It was extended, yes.”

 

Sakurai didn’t stop to face Ohno, almost detaching himself from the secretary’s words, although the other waited for him to grant him his attention.

 

“I know you told me not to bother coming but… I thought you would want to hear about it after all,” Ohno was ignored, but carried on. “It seems… things got way more side tracked than expected. Their interrogation was delayed, the members of the board were too divided to make a decision, so… they had to call in the CEO,” Sakurai had stopped carrying things across the room, which was enough of an indicator for Ohno to continue. “Apparently, during the meeting… certain information about the identities of the culprits was disclosed.”

 

This time it was inevitable to miss the confusion in Sakurai’s eyes trying to internalize what Ohno said. “…What?” he voiced in a whisper.

 

“It may be inaccurate and they’re still looking into it, but an investigation is being conducted right now. They’re looking into a great amount of evidence and could be confirming it at any moment. It’s only a matter of time…”

 

Sakurai let himself lean back on his desk, his eyes scanned the floor as he tried to understand what this meant.

 

“Still I’m no one to say what will happen to you now. I doubt they’ll let you stay here or even let you keep your office, but the CEO asked to meet you tomorrow morning to let you know. Although…” Ohno’s hand searched inside his blazer as he walked closer to Sakurai. “They sent me to return this,” Ohno set the folded piece of paper on Sakurai’s desk, from which the latter recognized the word _‘Resignation’_ in his own hand writing. “They didn’t need it anymore. Though, I can’t say the board was too happy about the CEO’s decision, this is what he agreed to after consulting it with Aiba himself. I have no idea how, but… Sho… he gave you your job back.”

 

“Why?” Sakurai asked in disbelief. “Why did he do it?”

 

“I wouldn’t know myself, but… maybe is not too late to ask.”

 

Sakurai glanced at Ohno, bewildered by his suggestion.

 

“Sho… I am not here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do, but you will never know if you don’t take these risks.” Ohno spoke harshly this time. “For once… you should be the person you promised him you would be.”

 

Sakurai didn’t need to hear another word, as it had already been decided in his mind what he had to do. For so long he had been trying to get away, it was the first time he felt he had to look for something.

 

“Where is he?”

 

 

~

 

 

Aiba became still in the middle of the empty lobby. He still hadn’t taken in the voice of whom called his name, but the rest of his body felt it all over him. He almost remembering what it felt to hear a voice that did so much to him with so little effort.

 

He wanted to turn around, but he realized he didn’t know how. Almost as if he were afraid of what he would find when he did. Yet, feeling _his_ hurrying steps come closer and stop behind him, he had no choice but to look, acknowledging Sakurai standing before him. Something about that sight alone was enough to make Aiba’s heart race.

 

Aiba froze in the other’s gaze and the air became harder to take in. After all, Aiba didn’t know what to do in his presence, confused about who he was looking at anymore. All he knew was that he wanted to hear his name being called by that voice once again.

 

Because no words came out of Sakurai for a long moment, Aiba stepped up first to bow his head, as it was the most natural thing to do whenever Sakurai stood before him.

 

“No,” Sakurai’s voice finally emerges, stopping Aiba’s formal greeting. “Please… don’t.”

 

Aiba recollects himself, this time noticing the words that struggled out of Sakurai. “I think… I owe you an explanation.” He begins. Aiba finds his voice so much different than before when he gave out orders or tried to display authority. It felt real for once, no longer hiding behind formalities. “I’ve been hiding from you for so long, I’m… it is not fair-”

 

“Stop,” Aiba raised a hand before Sakurai could go on. “I don’t need another apology.”

 

If Aiba really meant there was nothing else worth apologizing for, Sakurai would’ve proved him wrong.

 

“I-I’m sorry, I…” Sakurai stopped himself, realizing he was doing it again. He cursed to himself under his breath. “I’m not… very good at this.” Sakurai said instead, not knowing where to pose his eyes.

 

Aiba noticed the other’s stammering and couldn’t help but add. “You were always shy.” There was a small yet noticeable reaction in Sakurai as he recognized those familiar words, but unlike those times, he didn’t try to fight it or prove Aiba wrong.

 

A silence spread between them, their eyes were unable to stay still on one another. After all, it was hard to come across the words when they were no longer a phone line apart.

 

“I guess I should say,” Aiba finally spoke. “I overreacted earlier, at the elevator. I was not in the right mind to say those things to you. You would understand, no? Maybe we could… forget about it.”

 

“It’s in the past.” Sakurai said.

 

“A-And what I said at the bar… I wish I could say it wasn’t me talking.”

 

Sakurai nodded although troubled. “Then… while we’re at it, perhaps I should clear up what happened that night. I didn’t mean to let it get out of hand.”

 

Aiba stared at him confusedly before the memory came back to him, leaving a hint of color in his cheeks with the reminder.

 

“Oh…” Aiba looked away, to not let himself be caught in Sakurai’s gaze. “About that… I’m not sure I can recall exactly…”

 

“You… don’t remember?” Sakurai asked.

 

“Not everything,” Aiba shook his head, hiding from Sakurai’s gaze. “Did we get to…?”

 

“N-No!” Sakurai answered quickly, preventing his bashfulness from getting in his way.

 

Aiba’s look fell, although Sakurai wasn’t too sure why. Aiba chuckled nervously. “We’ve done some stupid things haven’t we?” Aiba said suddenly, and Sakurai wasn’t too sure what to answer. “It’s like we haven’t learned a thing.”

 

“I know,” Sakurai said. “This is my fault after all.”

 

“Fault?” Aiba asked a little surprised. “Are you saying it was wrong?”

 

“Was it not?” Sakurai asked.

 

Aiba thought by himself before a smile peeked from his lips. “I had fun,” his words gained a wide stare from Sakurai. “Meeting Anon… getting to know him… It’s the most fun I had in all my time working here.”

 

“I don’t think I’m capable of living up to someone like that.” Sakurai said, a pain engraved in his voice.

 

“But he is you,” Aiba said. “And you are him.” He took a step closer, searching for Sakurai’s eyes which had fallen and now were finding their way back to Aiba’s glistening ones. “He is here too, isn’t he? In that ‘O’ that your names share. ‘O’ as in Sho, isn’t it? That’s your name. I was right after all. About knowing your name. Though I don’t think I’m capable of understanding why. Why did you like someone… like me? I mean you’re my boss, and I… I don’t exactly stand out from the rest.”

 

“I know I’m not what you imagined.” Sakurai avoided his question. “And I wish I could have had the guts to do this differently, where I didn’t end up hurting you or disappointing you. I wonder if there even was a possibility where everything would have worked out.”

 

“Me too.” Aiba responded to Sakurai’s surprise. “Though I really do wonder if anything would have worked any other way. After all, it’s because of how you opened up to me that I decided to believe you.”

 

“Why are you doing this?” Sakurai asked. “You’re supposed to be mad at me. Why do you talk as if I had a choice to make it better? When all I’ve done is hurt you. Why do you insist on making everything right?”

 

“I don’t know.” Aiba looked confused himself. “I’m trying to imagine if I would have done the same thing as you, but I can’t think of a way anyone would be the kind of fool I was.”

 

“We both were.” Sakurai added.

 

The hint of a smile curled on Aiba’s lips. “That explains it.”

 

 

“About the meeting…” Sakurai began. “How did you do it?”

 

“I asked for them to give you a second chance. After all, it was my own fault we were caught like that, when I could have prevented it sooner. The CEO seemed like an easy person to convince, though I can’t say the same about the rest of them. It may not be much, but at least the CEO promised a fair punishment without the need of drastic measures. Though… they may decide on a transfer after all.”

 

“Then, maybe we should make things right once and for all.” Sakurai said. Although Aiba was afraid of what he meant, he listened. “The truth is… I’m your superior. It was stupid of me to think that you would see me as anything else. Therefore, I don’t see a reason why we should lie to ourselves.”

 

Aiba’s look fell, wondering who was really lying then and there.

 

“That promise you made to me, about your answer… forget about it. It doesn’t matter anymore.” Sakurai said instead, taking Aiba aback. “Besides, it was unfair of me to pressure you in such a way. It was clearly not what you wanted. You’ve already given me enough. If anything, I am grateful that you would’ve allowed me this time, for as short as it may have seemed, to know you so closely.”

 

“Are you saying… it won’t be like that anymore?” Aiba questioned him. “And then? What good would it be that you knew me?”

 

“Maybe… If we could remain as friends, even if you don’t forgive me, perhaps it wouldn’t have been in vain.” Sakurai could see the unsettlement in Aiba’s expression, but before the younger could say anything, Sakurai tried to reason. “Aiba… You know we can’t-”

 

“I know,” Aiba interrupted, afraid to hear it coming from Sakurai’s mouth. “It’s sort of unfair… you got to see me this whole time, but I only get this memory of you. The real you. It should have lasted longer.”

 

“You’re right,” said Sakurai. “It should have.”

 

“And now I’m supposed to see you go?” Aiba sighed.

 

“Perhaps it would be less unfair if we both left.” Sakurai suggested, not knowing the younger would take him seriously.

 

“Before that, would you let me say goodbye?”

 

Although Sakurai appeared hesitant to go along with Aiba’s suggestion, he nodded firmly, inviting Aiba to say all he needed. Though Sakurai was stunned when he felt Aiba’s body approaching him unannounced. It barely gave Sakurai time to acknowledge Aiba’s hands tug on his blazer and the proximity of the younger’s eyes in which he became lost in.

 

From the moment Sakurai felt his parted lips being watched and his heart race, he allowed the sensations run through him. When instead he felt Aiba’s tight embrace trap him, Sakurai held his breath. His arms remained on his sides, scared of reacting at all. He’d made it so far determined to fix everything he did wrong, but now, surrounded by the younger’s warmth, he admitted he never would have expected to feel so at ease in his arms again. And it made him wonder how something so wrong could be in any way right.

 

Aiba’s arms curled around Sakurai’s neck, he could feel Aiba’s breath ease against his skin and his embrace tighten, as if almost afraid to let go. Eventually, Aiba’s voice came around whispering the words close to Sakurai’s ear. “I'm glad I found you.”

 

Sakurai wondered when his own breath began to quiver. His body gave in and his arms returned Aiba’s embrace, holding him tightly as to not let it end.

 

They had forgotten to count the seconds it took for them to break apart, and even when they did, it felt as if they had lost part of themselves. But they had decided it would have worked no other way.

 

Aiba wished to leave his uncertainty behind, so he wiped his cheek with his sleeve before the other would notice, yet his attempt was in vain. When Sakurai saw the younger’s effort to hide his sentiments, he couldn’t help but feel guilty all over again.

 

It was then when Aiba felt Sakurai’s touch. His familiar and gentle hand resting on the side of his cheek, lifting Aiba’s head ever so slightly and capturing his gaze. His thumb wiped a tear off Aiba’s cheek the latter hadn’t realize was there before.

 

 

Aiba became lost in the eyes that stared into his, feeling vulnerable by his overflowing feelings but secure with just a brush of Sakurai’s hand. And in that certainty Sakurai conveyed to him, Aiba found a way to soothe his own wavering feelings. It was the first time Aiba had stared at him so closely with his eyes opened and realized it was still _him_.

 

In their silence, Sakurai’s touch left Aiba’s skin. Unsure of the exchange of good byes, they looked into one another before turning away and leaving each other’s sides. It was only when the distance grew between them that a smile became apparent in their lips. Along with an unspoken promise to not forget, they walked away without looking back, afraid that if they tried they would regret it all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: End of Chapter 11. An unexpected conclusion, perhaps, but not yet an ending. Let me know what you think! Thanks for reading~! Next is our final chapter. (Wow... we're almost done!)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The final chapter is finally here. A very special thanks to my friend Dhay for her help ^^ MOBILE VIEW RECOMMENDED. As indicated above, this fanfiction is mystery genre. THE PAIRING WILL NOT BE SPECIFIED IN THE FANFICTION DESCRIPTION, EVER. If you want to know the mystery, you must read. I want you to have fun with it. Thanks and I hope you enjoy! I don't own them, sadly.

Chapter 12

 

 

3 Months Later

 

 

“There seems to be something missing. Your number aren’t quite measuring up.”

 

“I’d say you’re not giving everything we want to hear, you’ll never convince a client if you do this with just half of your potential.”

 

“Yes, I agree.”

 

“What do you think… Aiba?”

 

“Perhaps you should be taking more risks,” Aiba leaned over the table to observe the written presentation with detail. “There is a lot more investigation that needs to be done. That should be your focus. This looks like a good place to start, but your client would be expecting more considering they want to make business out of this. You would want to make it something that not just they feel comfortable with but everyone else as well. Review your requirements, but don’t be afraid to put in your own preferences. After all, that is why you were handed the responsibility.”

 

It was a common sight amongst the employees of the advertising department to be left discouraged after an evaluation, though things had changed ever since Aiba Masaki had started taking part of their meetings. As the new assistant administrator in their department, employees looked forward to listening to his suggestions which helped them get through their meetings with a clear mind and the desire to do better. Perhaps it was the fact that Aiba had been in their same position not long before that helped as an advantage for him to understand the employees’ approach and push them in the right direction. That alone made Aiba Masaki very different from other supervisors.

 

“Thank you for today, Aiba!” The department supervisor would come up to him at the end of the evaluations. “It didn’t think I could get through so many performance reviews if it weren’t for your help.”

 

“It’s no problem!” Aiba would smile back as he truly appreciated their constant praise.

 

“Say, do you have any plans later today? We were thinking of heading somewhere for lunch. It be great if you could along.”

 

Aiba was more than used to their invitations, and he had gave them company many times before, yet today he felt different about it. “Today… is a little difficult, sorry. You’ll have to excuse me this time, but I’ll let you know when I’m available.”

 

“Don’t tell me you have another meeting. You never take a break, do you?”

 

Aiba laughed nervously before he excused himself from the conference room. He was afraid to admit they were right, although it was not the same kind of meeting they spoke about.

 

~

 

 _“He was a total jerk!”_ Ninomiya’s voice burst through the phone line, making Aiba lift the phone from his ear momentarily. _“What a waste of an interview, he totally sabotaged me on purpose!”_

 

“Now, that can’t be it-”

 

_“You should have seen it. I’ve never walked out of an office so pissed off! I even told the guy after me to not even bother going in. Gosh… I should have taken back my résumé, they made me look like an idiot! As if I didn’t feel stupid enough wearing this suit. Have I told you how much I hate ties?”_

 

Aiba chuckled, balancing his phone against his shoulder while he assorted the documents that were all over his desk. His new department had proven to be a lot more spacious and practical than his last. It consisted of a fewer number of desks lined across the room, providing each employee their own personal space.

 

 _“What a waste of my time…”_ Nino’s complaints went on.

 

“I trust that’s not what you told them.”

 

_“I wish.”_

“Maybe you should put those minor interviews to rest. Didn’t you land two second interviews last week?”

 

 _“I did,”_ Nino spoke with a mouth full of his lunch. _“But those are not until Friday.”_

“That’s fine. You can go over what we practiced and try passing those instead.”

 

Ninomiya scoffed. _“I got this in the bag. Those guys will be fighting for me during the final interviews.”_

 Aiba was glad Nino couldn’t see him roll his eyes. “You should save up that confidence.” he suggested.

 

 _“Anyway, what are we doing tonight?”_ Nino changed the subject. _“I was thinking, we haven’t gone out to celebrate Satoshi’s promotion yet, and he’ll become a senior before we know it so…”_

“Oh, that’s right…” Aiba paused his work. “I almost forgot about it. Although… No, I can’t do tonight.”

 

 _“Why am I not surprised?”_ Nino sighed, a little disappointed. _“What is it this time? Work? A meeting? A Date?”_

 

“It might be… the latter? I’m not sure if I would call it that.” Aiba admitted which made Nino’s side of the line silent.

 

“Wait… Are you still going out with Jun?”

 

“Yes, but it’s not what you think,” Aiba clarified quickly. “I’m just… making things clear tonight, that’s all.”

 

_“Fine… If it’s that complicated, we should leave it for tomorrow.”_

“… About that…”

 

 _“What?”_ Ninomiya sounded annoyed.

 

“I might not be here tomorrow.”

 

Aiba could almost hear Ninomiya’s brow rise. _“What do you mean ‘here’? You’re not going in to work?”_

“I’m not planning on it, no.”

 

_“Then, you’ll be home? You can still meet with us at the restaurant, you know.”_

“I meant to say… I’m not sure of where I’ll be tomorrow,” Aiba said. For a moment he thought Nino had not heard him after receiving no response from the other. “But I can’t tell for sure.”

 

 _“Aiba?”_ There was a change in Nino’s tone. _“Is everything okay?”_

 

Aiba remained silent, not knowing how to answer his question honestly. It was difficult to hide his feelings from Nino.

 

“You and Ohno should have that dinner for yourselves. I’ll just be in your way…”

 

_“Aiba-”_

“Nino, it’s fine. Seriously, I mean it.”

 

It was odd, but Aiba’s word did sound honest. _“Are you going to Yokohama?”_

 

“It depends.” Was all Aiba could say.

_“Then… when are you coming back?”_ Nino still insisted on knowing all he could from the other.

 

“Soon, I suppose. I still have to go to work, but I’m taking a long weekend just to make sure.”

 

_“And you won’t tell me what it is until you do it?”_

“I don’t want to get my hopes up.” Aiba responded. “It’s better this way…” Aiba respired with a noticeable melancholy in his voice. As Ninomiya could only accept his words, Aiba glanced at the clock on the wall of the office. “Damn it, I almost forgot. I’m late… Nino, can I call you back?”

 

 _“Don’t worry about it,”_ Nino assured him. _“I know everything will work out.”_ His words gave Aiba some of the certainty he had been losing throughout the day. He could never hide anything from his dear friend, especially when it was something Ninomiya had encouraged him to do before. Yet, it was different this time. He made no use of his friend’s help to figure out any sort of plan and decided to go with his own instincts, even if it meant bringing back those memories he’d once promised to forget.

 

~

 

Aiba knocked on the door to the private office and was granted passage from a voice inside. Coming in, he found the director behind his desk turned to a window as he hid the conversation taking place through his phone. The director couldn’t greet Aiba as he’d began to raise his voice through the line, yet a glimpse at the younger was enough to welcome him inside.

 

Aiba walked in quietly as Ohno finished his call with rough orders. This was no longer an unusual sight for Aiba since the promotion of his former secretary.

 

“Busy day, sir?”

 

“More of the same,” Ohno sighed as he put his phone down. “I would kill for some sleep right about now.”

 

“I doubt your secretary would like it if he found you sleeping at your desk again.”

 

“Don’t remind me,” Ohno said with disgust. “That brat Chinen can complain all he wants. I didn’t promote him to give me orders.” Ohno took a seat at his desk.

 

“He admires you, you know? He is only looking out for you. Maybe if you gave him some more time to let him get used to the job, you might get along with him.” Aiba presented him the folders he carried with him.

 

“You have no idea how many times I have to tell him not to step on my heels when he walks behind me.” Ohno complained, accepting the papers Aiba delivered to him. Aiba liked to sympathize with the idea that he became more confident around Ohno those last few months due to his lack of trust towards his secretary.

 

“He sure is into you.”

 

“Tell that to Nino.” Ohno scoffed, and it didn’t surprise Aiba at all that he would bring up his boyfriend so casually with him.

 

“You’re still not having that discussion, are you?”

 

“He can’t help it. Every time I do so much as mention Chinen, he turns cold on me. It’s ridiculous!”

 

“Nino has always been quite jealous... though I’m sure if Nino got to meet your secretary, he would know he has nothing to worry about.”

 

Ohno paused over his thoughts as if considering it. “You think that might work?”

 

“Ohno… I’m kidding. It’ll be ridiculous.”

 

Ohno groaned, moving in his chair impatiently. Although he saw no problem with proving to Nino he had no feelings what-so-ever towards his secretary, perhaps sharing his private life with Chinen was not the most clever of his ideas. As Ohno had lost himself in a thought, he barely noticed Aiba’s farewell and found him walking to the door. “Aiba!” Ohno called suddenly.

 

Aiba turned on his heels to look at the older who’d even stood up from his chair again.

 

“Do you have a moment? I was hoping… we could talk a little? Privately.” Ohno’s voice became smaller. Aiba came closer to his desk once again and allowed him to continue. “Nino called earlier. He mentioned you were planning something...”

 

Aiba was not surprised Nino would have spoken with Ohno already, although Aiba regretted not telling the younger to not share it with anyone else. Especially Ohno.

 

“I was a little concerned at first, but I think we both understand what you’re trying to do.” Aiba was about to say something when Ohno rose his hand to stop him. “Don’t get me wrong.” Ohno clarified. “I know I disagreed before and I understand why you chose not to tell me about this now, but… I have been meaning to tell you something and I need to get it out of the way… I take back what I said to you before.”

 

Aiba said nothing although this was not what he expected from Ohno.

 

“I may have been harsh, I know. I was thinking like a professional when I said those things. I didn’t realize that was not what you needed to hear. I hope you can forgive me.”

 

Aiba nodded slowly. “It’s no problem.”

 

“But it is,” said Ohno and for a moment, Aiba noticed the worry in the other’s expression. “I spoke to him not too long ago and I was wrong to say you shouldn’t get close to him. You see, he… doesn’t sound too well. It’s almost like… he is not himself anymore. I don’t want to think it’s my fault, but… I think he needs you, after all.”

 

“Ohno-”

 

“I know… this may sound really selfish coming from me, but please… he is my friend. Since I met him, I had never left his side and right now, he is probably the most alone he’s been in a very long time. Keeping you from him… it was wrong. So, I am asking you now, forget all I said before. Please go to him. He needs you more than what he realizes. This distance… is only making it worse. And I don’t want to make myself a villain between you-”

 

“Ohno,” Aiba interrupted. “Even if you told me all this, there’s no way I would not go. You may not know it yet, but I do need him, perhaps the same way he needs me now.”

 

Ohno had not thought of what to expect from Aiba, but now he acknowledged his opinion didn’t really matter to the younger. If only, he made himself seem out of place.

 

Ohno went through his desk the next moment to take out a small piece of paper and pen. He wrote down a single line before held out the note to Aiba.

 

“Here. I suppose you’ll need it after all,” Ohno invited him to take it. Aiba examined it quietly. “It’s his private number. I believe you may have lost it.”

 

The times he had asked Ohno for those same numbers without success managed a chuckle out of him, never imagining Ohno would be the one to hand it over to him. Even so, Aiba placed the note on Ohno’s desk.

 

“I’m sorry, sir,” Aiba said formally. “I don’t need it anymore.” The older looked at him puzzled. “I may or may not have acquired it already, but I appreciate your help.”

 

Although still appearing confused, Ohno knew there was only one other person that would go out of his way to help Aiba. And he honestly expected no less from him.

 

“Aiba…” Ohno called him a last time before Aiba would reach the door. “Don’t let them know, by any circumstances.” Ohno warned him. Aiba already found it problematic that Ohno knew about his intentions, but he appreciated Ohno was still someone he could confidently call a friend.

 

“If I may say so, sir,” Aiba spoke once again. “I always believed a great leader was someone who was never afraid to admit their mistakes.” Ohno gave him a confused look which made the younger chuckle and add, “The position of director suits you.” Aiba bowed before walking out the door.

 

~

 

He excused himself from work earlier that day, heading towards a café not far from the company building. He didn’t have to wait long before who he waited for came into the establishment. There was a silent exchange of looks before he finally decided to approach Aiba at the table.

 

Aiba didn’t order anything, nor did he wait for Kazama to make an order, he simply placed the papers in front of Kazama and let him read them on his own.

 

“I explained to them your current situation the best I could, and they seemed willing to help. They’ll want to know the reason why you were dismissed, so that will depend on you to elaborate. In any case, I already sent in my recommendation, so in the least, I’d say you should try.”

 

Kazama stared back at him baffled, having a hard time taking in what he held in his hands. “You’re offering me a job?”

 

“It is not our company, but they have close affiliations. I believe they’re short on staff. Of course, I can’t guarantee you’ll be given anything similar to what you had with us. In any case, you’ll need to work your way up, but it’s a better pay and better benefits than a construction site. It’ll be a bigger help to pay for your fine.”

 

Kazama looked doubtful, scanning the pamphlets Aiba had given him and the form for a job application.

 

“You still have to go through the interview process for them to accept you and they have all the right to reject you according to your performance, so… it’s in your hands.”

 

“Why are you doing this?”

 

“I don’t know what you may think of me now… but we’ve been friends for a very long time.” Aiba explained. “Even if that has changed for you it doesn’t erase the fact that you were always there for me. So, I would like for you to consider this to be a truce. I don’t want to owe you anything anymore, and I hope this makes us even.”

 

“Even? For what?”

 

“The photograph,” Aiba answered, only leaving Kazama with more questions. “It was you who blurred me out of the picture, wasn’t it? I knew it since the moment I saw it,” Kazama’s gaze turned away, exposed by Aiba’s words. “Out of all the people involved, I don’t think anyone would have thought about me the way you did. I think… you always had a sixth sense for getting me out of trouble.”

 

“You weren’t the target,” Kazama clarified. “There’s nothing more to that.” but Aiba knew there was little for him to justify.

 

“Believe it or not,” Aiba added. “You’re the most honest person I’ve ever called my friend.”

 

Kazama still refused to accept his words, turning away as to make himself look indifferent while wishing he could have the courage to face him again.

 

Aiba had begun to pick up his things and had gotten up from his chair when Kazama dared to ask. “Are you still seeing that guy?”

 

Aiba glanced at him momentarily before a smile curled in his lips, though in his eyes, Kazama felt the melancholy of something that was beyond his comprehension. Realizing there was more in Aiba than what Aiba himself could manage to express, Kazama felt as if he’d only made a fool of himself for asking.

 

 

~

 

He arrived at the restaurant perhaps too early, but he resolved on waiting for the meantime, occasionally glimpsing at his wristwatch to make sure he had time to catch his train. He began to feel impatient when night came and he was offered a table to wait at instead. Eventually, his nerves settled when he finally saw him come into the restaurant in a hurry and with an apologetic smile.

 

“I’m so sorry I’m late… I should have called you sooner,” Jun said regretfully, taking a seat across from Aiba.

 

“It’s okay.” Aiba assured him. “You’re here now.”

 

“Did you wait long?” Jun asked. Aiba observed him carefully, noticing how clean the other was dressed. Even his hair bangs had a different style than how he wore them during work, but Jun always looked his best when it came to their dates.

 

Aiba had already lost count of the times they had gone out together, but it had been two long months since it started. After their former director was transferred to a different branch, Jun had approached him with a tempting invitation that eventually they recalled as their first date. But Aiba wanted to take things slowly and he made sure Jun understood that. They only went out to public places and Jun was careful enough to never refer to Aiba as his boyfriend just in case. Each date ended with Jun walking him home and asking before kissing him, but never coming in to Aiba’s apartment.

 

The conditions built around their relationship were sometimes even a burden to keep up with, and Aiba didn’t understand why Jun would want to follow any of it. But Matsumoto had proved himself patient with him all this time, his only interest was to make Aiba feel ready before engaging into anything bigger. Aiba’s only regret now was never being honest with him from the very start. 

 

Aiba denied having waited out of courtesy, but he had expected to get things done sooner. Glancing at his watch, he knew he was going to be late.

 

Jun begun to inspect the menu when Aiba felt his nerves kicking in again. Not knowing how he would get through with this, he took a deep breath.

 

“Actually… I may have to skip dinner tonight,” Aiba began. “In all honesty, I called you here for a different reason.”

 

Jun was taken aback by Aiba’s sudden announcement, but he quickly set the menu aside to grant him his attention. “What is it?”

 

“I don’t know if there is any easy way of saying this.” Aiba sighed, trying to ease his trembling hands. “Jun… you’re amazing, and the most wonderful person I’ve met. I’ve learned that since the moment I met you and I’m reminded of it each time I’m with you. You’ve made feel like I’m a special part of your life even when I doubt myself so much, and for that I truly thank you.” Aiba could feel his heart racing with just the look he gained from Jun, but he had to go on before it was too late. “I know I told you I would try my best to understand your feelings and somehow make this work between us, but instead…I’ve learned something about myself I was too sacred to admit before. That what you feel for me, I feel it too… for someone else.”

 

Jun’s look fell in silence, as he had nothing to say. Yet Aiba wouldn’t allow him to feel discouraged. “I’m sorry if I ever made you misunderstand me. I shouldn’t have played with your feelings like this.” Aiba continued. “All this time I’ve just been regretting every decision I did in the past, but you always reminded me to look for what I wanted and I’ve finally found that thanks to you. So don’t ever think our time together was in vain. If it wasn’t for you… I would have forgotten that which means so much to me.”

 

Jun’s thoughts had wondered off and the smile he had arrived with faded from his lips. “You love him, don’t you? Anonymous.” Jun asked, perceiving the effect of his own words on Aiba. “I know it’s none of my business and I only know because I saw your phone once by chance, I don’t even know the guy but… it’s always been on my mind why you were always stuck to your phone. Though you’re not like that anymore. What happened?”

 

Aiba sighed. “We went our sperate ways.”

 

“Then, you’re not seeing each other?”

 

“No… we haven’t met for a while.”

 

“I see…” Jun sighed deeply, collecting his thoughts again before he could carry on. “In that case, I’ve already made up my mind. I’m not giving up on you.” he said, firmly, taking Aiba by surprise. “You’re not together, and you’re not even sure if he’ll take you back, so if it doesn’t work out… I’ll be here. I’ll wait for you.”

 

“Jun, you’re not being fair to yourself-”

 

“I know I must sound desperate to you,” Jun interrupted. “But… don’t we all do crazy things for the people we love?” Jun smiled to him, almost like the first time they had ever looked at each other deeply, only now Masaki wasn’t able to lose himself in the younger’s gaze without thinking of another.

 

 

Aiba chuckled, wondering how much of a fool he was for rejecting the man in front of him, and he understood how right Matsumoto was. But Aiba believed he could longer compromise with taking the easy way out.

 

 

~

 

 

_‘I lied to you.’_

_‘I’m not doing this anymore.’_

_‘You might have hurt me before, but forgetting you is the  
hardest thing you’ve ever asked from me.’_

_‘I don’t want to pretend I lost you.’_

_‘You say perhaps things wouldn’t have worked  
 out between us, but I think you’re wrong.’_

_‘I trusted you unconditionally and without  
 knowing you, I loved you.’_

_‘How can a person I’ve never seen before  
 make me feel so much?’_

_‘I refuse to think you’re gone.’_

_‘That you won’t come back.’_

_‘Or that it was our fault that we had to split apart.’_

_‘It wasn’t.’_

_‘So why are we hiding from each other, when no one  
can touch us here?’_

_‘Why did we run away?’_

_‘We must have thought that it was correct.’_

_‘Do you still believe that?’_

_‘No.’_

_‘I don’t think I’ve ever been more of a fool.’_

_‘Would you tell me something?’_

_‘Anything.’_

_‘What would you do if I were with you right now?’_

_‘I wouldn’t let you go.’_

_‘It’s a long way from home.’_

_‘It wouldn’t matter if you were here.’_

_‘I don’t think I could stand going back so soon,  
 but for you, I would try anything.’_

_‘I would take my chances.’_

_‘You’re outside right now aren’t you?’_

Sakurai stopped all together, his attention caught in the text in his phone. Momentarily, he looked around him, outside of the building of the company offices, but saw no more than strangers. He retuned to his phone to find the other typing.

_‘It’s a beautiful night.’_

_‘It is.’_

_‘Seeing you now is just what I imagined.’_

_‘What did you imagine?’_

_‘Just you.’_

_‘You’re everything I can think of.’_

_‘You stopped walking now, why?’_

_‘Let me see you.’_

_‘When you do, what will happen then?’_

_‘We’ll stop hiding.’_

_‘And after? Would you let me feel you again?’_

_‘I will.’_

_‘And kiss me?’_

_‘I will.’_

_‘Would you tell me you love me?’_

 

For once, Sakurai was glad they were a phone away for the lump in his throat wouldn’t have let him answer.

 

_‘It’s a promise.’_

 

 The End

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I simply cannot believe I've actually finished something in my life. As I said before, I've been planing this story since Jun 2016 and I'm still amazed of how much this story grew from it's first drafts. This fic was my only source of entertainment when my country went through 2 very devastating hurricanes and if it wasn't for that time I don't think I would have been able to finish it as fast as I did. I had so much fun sharing this and reading your reactions made my day each time. I cannot thank you enough for your support. I would like a round of applause for arashikuro who has put up with me for the last year and 90k words. It wouldn't have turned out as coherent if it wasn't for your big help <3 And thank you for those of you who left comments which each update, you've made this all the more exciting! 
> 
> I hope I can do another project like this one soon, but I'll be quiet for a while until I can finish with my semester. Hopefully I will get lots of things done in the summer. Thank you all again for reading and commenting, I hoped you enjoyed! And I'll see you next time.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I'm so happy I finally get to share this with you guys, this should be fun! Next chapter will be very soon. Thanks for reading and see you next chapter!


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